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Demetz

Happy News!

Okay, so two days ago I was breaking down in tears because it seemed like no matter what I did I could never get out of the rathole im currently living in. I got an extra shift permanently added to my schedule and im not a moron - i know how to live on a budget and what I can afford. With the extra shift each week I can afford my own place but it seemed like everywhere I went they wanted 3x rent as minimum monthly income. I was ready to give up... but yesterday I came across an ad in the paper..
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Demetz

Did I shave my nuts for this?

A few days ago a cute guy i met online asked me out for a date for today. We were supposed to go to the beach. A few hours ago i send him a text message asking me when he wants to meet. The first answer I get back is "when do you want to f**K" and I thought "what the hell, you asked me on a date not to screw" so I messaged him back asking if that was all he was interested in. He responds that he was just checking to make sure thats not what I was interested in. Great... he thinks he has to be de
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Demetz

New guy; new job?

So last night I had this guy come over. We go out to dinner at applebees for their 2 for 20 special and have nice and ranging conversation... then we go back to my place and for the next couple hours our hands are all over each other but we keep our pants on...   Actually... I could give a very thorough and exciting description of all the foreplay that went on between us, but instead I'm going to skip all that and say that at about 2am I asked if he wanted to spend the night or head home... he
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Demetz

So much for stage two!

Haha, okay so maybe not yet but with last night....   Well I'll start at the beginning. The beginning of yesterday, anyway. Yesterday was a Tuesday, my day off, so I had lots of free time and its also the day I do my best to find myself a date. During the day time I went out and took the Florida Criminal Justice Basic Abilities Test. While I was there I decided to go ahead and start the PASS process, which when complete will put me into the candidate pool for law enforcement agencies across al
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Demetz

End of the year happiness

So a good friend flew down to spend new year's with me and so far we have had an excellent time. Yesterday we went to the beach and spent most of the day there, walked through the surf, shared an icecream cone, and watched the sunset. To make a great day even better, this girl took pictures of us together watching the sunset and e-mailed them to me. I'm so happy he came and really enjoying our time together.      
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Demetz

Cancer

When I was sixteen, my Grandfather died of cancer to the lungs, liver, and kidneys. On Friday I found out my mom has skin cancer and is undergoing treatment. That night, I realized I have a lump on my right testicle... non painful.   According to what I've been able to find out, there are five things which can cause a non-painful lump. 1) Varicocele - some kind of inflamation of the veins, which is supposed to feel like a bag of worms... which does not fit the description of what I have.  
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Demetz

Friction Sex?

This is what Aaron asked of me last night..... essentially, lubing him up, lubing up my stomach, and then laying on me and sliding back and forth........ one problem though: I'm pretty hairy and that's not so comfortable.   Anyway... this guy moved very fast and I think I've figured out why. His ex is also his roomate and apparently his ex's car is also his primary means of transportation. His ex is apparently extraordinarily controlling and a bit of a drama queen. The ex actually wanted to co
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Demetz

New Year's Bad News

So today I was told i have 30 days to leave my current residence. It seems my landlord has a friend moving here from out of state and as the other friend already living here has known my landlord longer i'm at the bottom of the totem pole and on my way out.   Interesting how he didn't bother to inform me of this until AFTER I've paid him this month's rent, which had I known his plans, would have been paid to him weekly until i had a new place to stay.       I am not happy about this.
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Demetz

Idiots who stay with possessive-obsessives

Okay, So I've been had.   I don't know what to think/believe when it comes to the veracity of Aaron's claims. I do know that I don't trust him. Amusingly enough I actually put more weight in the word of his possessive-obsessive ex at this point.   It seems that Aaron had told him he would try to work things out with him. Hence the shock when he peaked through the window and saw Aaron jacking me off. Hence the emotional outburst a few minutes later. Hence the call I received from Jeremy a lit
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Demetz

A return to blogging

April 30, 2010         I've just completed a good run. I always feel well afterward, if a bit parched since I don't have a water bottle. I'll be fixing that soon, hopefully. I've been meaning to work out more regularly and I've decided that today will mark day zero for that effort. My goal is to eventually do two miles in fifteen minutes, and twenty minutes of running total. Today I got maybe a mile and a half before the fifteen minute mark and my lower legs felt like they were burning, but
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Demetz

Abortion: part 2

I would like to clarify that when I posted the previous blog I was highly frustrated for having been chewed out just previously for having an opinion on the issue at all. I have various reasons to be indignant about the events transpiring in that situation, but they're ultimately irrelevant to the issue of abortion and merely relate to the irrationality of the person I was misfortunate enough to speak near.   In spite of that person's protest that as a man I don't have a right to an opinion o
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Initial Results: I'm HIV- ; but I'm crying anyway

I'll get the rest of my test results back on Friday. I got the results for my HIV test back today: I'm non-reactive. Now, I'm really wishing I hadn't gone to see Dwayne in September because if I hadn't I wouldn't have had to do what I did next.   I left a tagline on my instant messenger relating that I was HIV -. He came online and asked me what the message meant. The rest of the conversation went like this:     His status is always set to appear offline so I don't know how much of that he
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Demetz

Evolving Identity

I just got done watching a movie called "Boy Culture" ... I enjoyed it even i don't care for all the hustling... still a few good points were made here and there. I ended up reflecting a bit on myself as I watched it and came across a scene where they're talking about the stages of being gay.   In stage 1, you've just come out to yourself and you have this romantic idea of not being a slut and meeting another guy who is also not a slut and living happily ever after with him. My stage 1 lasted
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Demetz

Changing Plans

Okay, first on the agenda today: my job. I'm not especially happy working at the restaurant. If a table comes in and can't figure out what the hell they want until the next table is in too, its like having double-duty. Top that up with having to put together all their salads myself and fetch countless little things for them that don't come with the meal and only some items go through the computer, but most don't so I have to remember when to punch stuff through....   Ugh.   I'm told breakfas
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Demetz

Sick of Being Stood UP

I'm not even going to bother anymore. Even when someone agrees to meet (rare enough, everybody's got some excuse) they don't actually show up.   I'm not that bad looking. I like to think I have a decent personality, but nobody bothers to actually go out with me.   So now I'm not bothering. Just going to do my own thing and quit caring.
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Demetz

Bicycle Lights

Tonight was my last night at work. It was the last night i would ever have to make that three mile ride through near pitch-black dark. I was going to ride on the far side of SR 70 since the side i normally ride on is having some work done on it in some places.   However, yesterday I learned that despite my mom's request to have the 22nd off was not just granted, it was also forgotten and she got scheduled anyway. What this means to me is I have to be up at 8:30 am on wednesday to get the uhaul
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Demetz

Losing my head

This entry gets rather personal and it covers less than cheery subject matter. I wrote this last night, feeling as miserable as could be...   I am losing my god damned head tonight. It didn
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Demetz

Feeling a bit better today

As always seems to happen with me, when I get to feeling bad I can feel good again by sleeping it off.   In other news... pics of me seem to have come into popular demand, so here's a good one... of me sliding off the face of the planet. Enjoy!  
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Demetz

I hate banks

Okay, so I go to get a brand new car.... new for me anyway; Its a Red 2002 Chrysler Sebring 4 door sedan with only 29,000 miles on it... leather interior, brand new tires... suffice it to say, this car is awesome.   Thing is, it would cost me about 10,000 between cost of the car itself, taxes, tags and other nonsense. Well, thats what my credit union is there for, right? WRONG. At first they tell me they can only do 9,000 so we work it out with the dealer so that i can have 45 days to come up
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Demetz

New beginnings

These past two days have been incredible.   Two days ago, out looking for a new place to live and a job, I meet this woman who wants to pray for me, so I figure why not? It couldn't hurt. Later, while checking out a place for a job, I meet another guy who's looking for a new place, we talk for a few hours and we think we've got a decent business deal worked out to cut down on our costs to find a place to live. He's not gay... he does have a nice body but not all that cute in the face, and kind
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Demetz

Islam and Homosexuality Part 2

I was referred to a video which supposedly justified the sactioned murder of homosexuals by Islamic law. Naturally I was skeptical.   http://islamictube.net/view_video.php?view...dd8fe4e481144d8   My skepticism was well warranted.   I do have to give the man credit for his discussion of the matter of homosexuality's naturalness. Indeed, humans are above the animal world because we have systems of morality and ethics and we can not govern our behavior by the idea that anything animals do is
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Demetz

2 years old

Its been a little over 2 years since I came out to myself. I hardly even remember what it was like thinking I was anything other than gay. My rebirth as a gay man 2 years ago resulted in a great deal of personal growth and changes, many good but the occasional one a bit more painful to go through.... life before being openly gay is now more of a distant memory, almost as though it happened to somebody else.   In some senses, it did happen to someone else. The me before I came out was radicall
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Demetz

Unsteady

Ever get the feeling the world or the universe as it were is running against you?   A year ago, I saw myself today being about to start my third semester of graduate school. Where am I instead?   I'm in the smallest room of my parents' house. I have a crappy job that doesn't pay well enough for the bank to approve the loan I need to get a non-crappy car. This means I do not have the option to move out of my parents house. Why is that? Surely I could just get a crappy car without the loan rig
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Demetz

Finances; Writing

So yesterday I got a nasty note from the university wanting me to pay $975 I didn't think I'd have to pay for another couple months... but even so, I should be able to pay that off and be almost completely out of credit card debt by the end of the month. It just means I won't have the cash on hand I thought I'd have to pay down my computer loan. By the end of next month I'll have the cards paid off completely and a hefty amount of cash in hand to buy a car the first week of June... when I'll fin
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Demetz

Moving Out

For ages now I've wanted to move out but earlier this week I made the decision: I'm going to do it.   Today I got a call back from someone whose ad I had responded to. He's 37, buying a house, and looking for a room mate. The house is a two bedroom, one bathroom home with big beautiful trees in the yard. We've set up a meeting saturday afternoon to meet and look at the place. He also mentioned he might drop by my restaurant friday evening.   Its 500/month with utilities included.... more th
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