I doubt anyone got through this long, whiney, rambling entry in the first place, but if you did thanks for listening, and even if you didn't I did it for me anyway.

 

 

I got through it Kevin!!!!

 

In terms of being positive, you are a lot like my BF. He's positive and always looking at the bright side of things 90-95% of the time. I'm Mr. Cloudly day, Mr. Skeptical, & Mr. Negative. Together we bring a balanced approach to anything that comes up. For example, he sees an ad in the paper 'Get a $100 gift card...' and gets all excited, trying to figure out what he's going to buy. I look at the fine print and break the news to him '..when you sign up for 1 year of Direct TV' .

 

I on the other hand, start stressing out when things aren't going according to plan, and he's Mr. 'Don't worry, it will all work out' and it usually does.

 

On rare occasions, when he's having a bad day or being negative, I have to roll up the sleeves and become Mr. Optimist.

 

I'm not sure I can help you in any way, but here's a couple things to keep in mind:

 

- It's good to keep talking(typing) about these things

- February is the shortest month of the year

- You shouldn't drink alone

- STAY AWAY FROM THE CHOCOLATE MOUNTAIN!

- One day you're going to make a lucky man very happy. You're a catch, just be patient.

 

Take Care®,

 

Vic

Dear Kevin,

 

Well, firstly and least importantly... I did make it through your whole post... on the first try even!

 

Now then... I think everyone has a bad time a some point or another... for me it's the first four months of the year and I drink root beer floats. It's perfectly healthy and normal for you to not be happy ALL the time, in fact, if you were, I would wonder and worry about you. That said, I really do believe that talking about it helps, even if nothing is solved or changed as a result. If you know the reason, like I do, for your bad time and you know it's coming, that even gives you a leg up because you can prepare yourself and act rationally when the time comes.

 

The next step, in my eyes is get a support system. People to talk to, even some you trust to offer good advice if you ask for it, and then find healthy ways to comfort yourself. I heard somewhere, and I sort of adopted it as my own policy, although it's definitely easier said than done to do it, and I'll admit that I'm not always successful, but I do try... and that is this... It takes too much energy to be angry all the time and most of the stuff you spend all that energy on being mad about won't even be bothering you in 5 years so don't let it bother you now. It's just not worth it. Besides, I'm a firm believer that you have to create your own happiness as much as possible. You can't just sit around waiting for it to randomly fall in your lap.

 

So, a chocolate hill maybe instead of a mountain, a drink with a friend while you're talking about what's bugging you, or a bubble bath are all fine compromises.

 

Hugs Kevin,

Viv

 

PS. You always can add me to that list of people when you want to talk

I don't think I have seasonal affect disorder (S.A.D.), but my mood is a tad susceptible to the weather.

erm... that's what SAD is. It may not, all by itself, throw you into a nasty blue funk, but it certainly doesn't help, and taking steps to offset it is usually a good thing. Standard stuff -- exercise, eat properly, try and get as much sun as you can (and since odds are you can't actually get enough this time of year, pump up your vitamin D intake) and that'll help offset it.

 

Won't do anything for the no guy for Valentine's problem, but if you're feeling better it's a lot easier to fix that particular problem...

Hey Kevin

 

I have to totally agree with you on your point that Febuary is depressing. I don't know what does it to me each year but it seems that ever since like 2nd grade February has been that way. I think some of it is the weather...I mean it's no longer winter with the gentle snowfall or what have you...instead it's a muddy melting mess all over with cold wind until the mess eventually gets evaporated and summer comes, at least in SD that is. I know that Spring is traditionally symbolic with rebirth as Winter is death but to me, winter isnt nearly as depressing as spring is.

 

I guess all I can suggest is a line from Annie (we're singing that in chorus right now so don't think I'm too weird ) which would be, "Ya got to hang on till tomorrow, come what may." Hehe, anyway, I hope all turns out good and take care .

I got through it Kevin!!!!

 

In terms of being positive, you are a lot like my BF. He's positive and always looking at the bright side of things 90-95% of the time. I'm Mr. Cloudly day, Mr. Skeptical, & Mr. Negative. Together we bring a balanced approach to anything that comes up. For example, he sees an ad in the paper 'Get a $100 gift card...' and gets all excited, trying to figure out what he's going to buy. I look at the fine print and break the news to him '..when you sign up for 1 year of Direct TV' .

 

I on the other hand, start stressing out when things aren't going according to plan, and he's Mr. 'Don't worry, it will all work out' and it usually does.

 

On rare occasions, when he's having a bad day or being negative, I have to roll up the sleeves and become Mr. Optimist.

 

I'm not sure I can help you in any way, but here's a couple things to keep in mind:

 

- It's good to keep talking(typing) about these things

- February is the shortest month of the year

- You shouldn't drink alone

- STAY AWAY FROM THE CHOCOLATE MOUNTAIN!

- One day you're going to make a lucky man very happy. You're a catch, just be patient.

 

Take Care

Dear Kevin,

 

Well, firstly and least importantly... I did make it through your whole post... on the first try even!

 

Now then... I think everyone has a bad time a some point or another... for me it's the first four months of the year and I drink root beer floats. It's perfectly healthy and normal for you to not be happy ALL the time, in fact, if you were, I would wonder and worry about you. That said, I really do believe that talking about it helps, even if nothing is solved or changed as a result. If you know the reason, like I do, for your bad time and you know it's coming, that even gives you a leg up because you can prepare yourself and act rationally when the time comes.

 

The next step, in my eyes is get a support system. People to talk to, even some you trust to offer good advice if you ask for it, and then find healthy ways to comfort yourself. I heard somewhere, and I sort of adopted it as my own policy, although it's definitely easier said than done to do it, and I'll admit that I'm not always successful, but I do try... and that is this... It takes too much energy to be angry all the time and most of the stuff you spend all that energy on being mad about won't even be bothering you in 5 years so don't let it bother you now. It's just not worth it. Besides, I'm a firm believer that you have to create your own happiness as much as possible. You can't just sit around waiting for it to randomly fall in your lap.

 

So, a chocolate hill maybe instead of a mountain, a drink with a friend while you're talking about what's bugging you, or a bubble bath are all fine compromises.

 

Hugs Kevin,

Viv

 

PS. You always can add me to that list of people when you want to talk

 

Aww Thanks Viv!

 

I'm sorry it's four whole months for you , I'm lucky that it's usually just one short one for me. You're right talking about it does help and thanks very much for the kind offer, I will definitely PM you sometime if I'm upset! And please feel free to do the same.

 

I too am a firm believer in people being at least partially responsible for their own happiness. That's why I blame my response as much as the actions that led to it. LOL I had a great bubble bath....in fact it turned into three (the water kept getting cold )

 

Have an awesome day and take care,

Kevin

erm... that's what SAD is. It may not, all by itself, throw you into a nasty blue funk, but it certainly doesn't help, and taking steps to offset it is usually a good thing. Standard stuff -- exercise, eat properly, try and get as much sun as you can (and since odds are you can't actually get enough this time of year, pump up your vitamin D intake) and that'll help offset it.

 

Won't do anything for the no guy for Valentine's problem, but if you're feeling better it's a lot easier to fix that particular problem...

 

Hey Zot, Thanks for the advice.

 

I don't really think I fully meet the criteria for SAD, I mean going down the checklist and stuff. but you're right doing those things would definitely help me to feel better. I do try to exercise and eat right. And actually I already take a vitamin D supplement.

 

Also while I know I'd feel better if I were "with" someone for Valentine's day, I've pretty much decided I don't want to start a relationship right now, since I have to move in about 3 and a half months anyway. Oh I wouldn't turn love away if it came knocking, I'd just be upfront about the fact that I were leaving soon, and just kind of see what happened (though I know then moving away would be hard for me). But I'm not going to look for something I can't finish.

 

Anyway, have an awesome day and take care,

Kevin

Hey Kevin

 

I have to totally agree with you on your point that Febuary is depressing. I don't know what does it to me each year but it seems that ever since like 2nd grade February has been that way. I think some of it is the weather...I mean it's no longer winter with the gentle snowfall or what have you...instead it's a muddy melting mess all over with cold wind until the mess eventually gets evaporated and summer comes, at least in SD that is. I know that Spring is traditionally symbolic with rebirth as Winter is death but to me, winter isnt nearly as depressing as spring is.

 

I guess all I can suggest is a line from Annie (we're singing that in chorus right now so don't think I'm too weird ) which would be, "Ya got to hang on till tomorrow, come what may." Hehe, anyway, I hope all turns out good and take care .

Thanks Ronnie!

 

You're right the weather is sucky in Feb. I'm sorry to hear you hate this time of year too. It's really weird in Louisiana, the weather is so bipolar right now. Like on Monday you have to wear long sleeves and/or a jacket. Then on Tuesday you're sweating your butt off and have to keep the AC blasting. Then Wednesday it'll rain all day or something and just have that nasty "wet, cold" feel. Then Thursday it'll keep raining but it'll be really hot and you feel like you're in some kinda humid rain forest or something.

 

Thanks for advice. I will hang on till tomorrow come what may . Lol anyway have an awesome day and take care.

 

Kevin

Heya Kevin

 

I doubt anyone got through this long, whiney, rambling entry in the first place, but if you did thanks for listening, and even if you didn't I did it for me anyway.

I got through it all too!

 

Kevin, I think you have a lot of interesting things to say and I know there are heaps of people around here who really appreciate your love, care, concern, your willing ear and your ready shoulder and that you are never backwards in coming forward and offering support.

 

about 90% of the time that I seem happy, I really am, just not always.

No one is totally happy 100% of the time. And to pretend to be happy all the time is just plain hard work.

 

You know what I think sucks the most? When people you care about, those who you let in past the brick wall, dump on you and don't give you the same love, respect and trust that you give them....and then you end up blaming yourself for something they have or haven't done! Been there, done that, got the t-shirt and still wear it from time to time.

 

Kevin, you know how we are to love others as we love ourselves? Maybe we need to turn that around and LOVE OURSELVES AS WE LOVE OTHERS! Loving yourself can be a really difficult lesson to learn. But on the other hand, hating yourself or your life is exhausting.

 

So, here I offer a couple or eight of suggestions...

*keep talking or typing about what is bothering you. There is a myriad of friends here who are waiting for the opportunity to bless you as you have blessed them,

*find someone you trust and really talk to them, (I know that is a tad repetative but it is the most important thing to do when you are feeling depressed or angry),

*being angry or upset about something doesn't make you a failure, it makes you a human being,

*remember a mistake isn't a mistake if you learn from it (vague reference to drinking so much that you wake up sick),

*the definition of a success is a person who gets up one more time than they fall down,

*february is the shortest month, so keep putting one foot in front of the other for as long as you are able,

*the light that you see at the end of the tunnel is not the head lamp of an oncoming train...it is an actual light - spring is on it's way,

and last but most importantly, send the chocolate mountain my way...

 

Bev

So I guess what bothers me the most isn't the "problems" anyway. It's me, it's how I deal with it, it's how I "cause" it in the first place. I mean yeah today sucked, but I know on one of my good days it wouldn't have bothered me at all, or very little. I straight out sabatouged my own day, I knew I was doing it, and I still couldn't stop myself.

I think that's called "being human" . Actually, you're ahead of most people because you realize that the key is not the things out there ("the problems"), it's how you cause it or deal with it.

 

The good news is, you got drunk instead of dealing with things, and saw that it didn't work and that it only made you feel worse. So you might be less inclined to handle things that way in the future.

 

BTW, I remember those Louisiana Februarys (Februaries? :wacko: ) -- I hear you had some bad weather there yesterday.

 

"The sun'll come out ... tomorrow ..."

 

Kitty

Heya Kevin

 

I got through it all too!

 

Kevin, I think you have a lot of interesting things to say and I know there are heaps of people around here who really appreciate your love, care, concern, your willing ear and your ready shoulder and that you are never backwards in coming forward and offering support.

 

No one is totally happy 100% of the time. And to pretend to be happy all the time is just plain hard work.

 

You know what I think sucks the most? When people you care about, those who you let in past the brick wall, dump on you and don't give you the same love, respect and trust that you give them....and then you end up blaming yourself for something they have or haven't done! Been there, done that, got the t-shirt and still wear it from time to time.

 

Kevin, you know how we are to love others as we love ourselves? Maybe we need to turn that around and LOVE OURSELVES AS WE LOVE OTHERS! Loving yourself can be a really difficult lesson to learn. But on the other hand, hating yourself or your life is exhausting.

 

So, here I offer a couple or eight of suggestions...

*keep talking or typing about what is bothering you. There is a myriad of friends here who are waiting for the opportunity to bless you as you have blessed them,

*find someone you trust and really talk to them, (I know that is a tad repetative but it is the most important thing to do when you are feeling depressed or angry),

*being angry or upset about something doesn't make you a failure, it makes you a human being,

*remember a mistake isn't a mistake if you learn from it (vague reference to drinking so much that you wake up sick),

*the definition of a success is a person who gets up one more time than they fall down,

*february is the shortest month, so keep putting one foot in front of the other for as long as you are able,

*the light that you see at the end of the tunnel is not the head lamp of an oncoming train...it is an actual light - spring is on it's way,

and last but most importantly, send the chocolate mountain my way...

 

Bev

 

Awww thank you Bev, I'm touched! I admit I do try to hold myself up to high standards, but I definitely wouldn't say I hate myself. Actually I'm one of my favourite people! You're right though I do need to accept that I won't be cheerful all the time. I don't even really feel bad about being a little grumpy with the people that were irritating me. I just feel bad about being "sour" toward perfectly innocent people because I was in a bad mood. Moods are definitely infectious, and if I've got a bad one I shouldn't make other people sick. I also regret that I let it ruin my whole day.

 

On the bright side though everything's fine now. I worked out all the concrete problems I had. Which basically consisted of a mix up with my moving out date for my current apt. and my moving in date with the new one. As well as difficulty contacting the necessarily people at my university to get my dipoloma mailing address sorted out. I was starting to come down with a cold, which I'm over. And all the people that were in bad moods and that things were "tense with" before; I'm back on good terms with.

 

Anyway thanks for the excellent advice and support, I really appreciate it. Have a terrific day and take care!

Kevin

I think that's called "being human" . Actually, you're ahead of most people because you realize that the key is not the things out there ("the problems"), it's how you cause it or deal with it.

 

The good news is, you got drunk instead of dealing with things, and saw that it didn't work and that it only made you feel worse. So you might be less inclined to handle things that way in the future.

 

BTW, I remember those Louisiana Februarys (Februaries? :wacko: ) -- I hear you had some bad weather there yesterday.

 

"The sun'll come out ... tomorrow ..."

 

Kitty

 

Hey Kitty! Thanks for kind post! I guess you're right sometimes people do sabatouge themselves. I just wish I'd quit lol.

 

There's a quote from a Reliant K song:

 

"the thing I hate more than everything, is how I'm powerless to dictate my own mood"

 

I think that's pretty true of me. Even with less positive things. Like if I'm mad at someone (for a good reason), I can never stay mad very long if they're nice to me. I guess I just feel like if anyone should be able to control my feelings, it's me. Oh well I'll get over that I guess

 

You were right about today, it was a beautiful day!

 

Thanks and have a really really great day!!

Kevin