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On Friendship and Diversity

Carlos Hazday

Entry posted by Carlos Hazday

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I suspect some readers may consider the cast I surrounded CJ—the protagonist in my ongoing series—unrealistic. The diverse group of supporting characters could be construed as wishful thinking at a time our country seems divided along so many lines. I beg to differ.

 

IT IS NOT A FANTASY.

 

A few weeks ago, I traveled to New York to celebrate my 60th birthday; I was reminded how lucky I’ve been with the people I’ve surrounded myself with. A caring, loving group of humans, the world would be better if we had more like them.

 

Brunch at an apartment in the Upper East Side, a museum visit to see the David Bowie exhibit, cocktails at a hipster pub in Brooklyn, and ice cream at a place where the line doubled upon itself and spilled out the door. And through it all, constant conversation and laughter.

 

One person I’ve known for forty years, their spouse around thirty. Another one I met thirty-five years ago when we joined the same board of directors; their spouse I met a decade later. One is a fan of my stories on Gay Authors—my work having fans is the weirdest feeling—and we’ve chatted for a couple of years but this was our first live interaction. The other two—a father and son duo—I met for the first time that day.

 

The seven individuals I spent time with on that one day are proof the world I describe isn’t fantasy. We were adults and children, men and women, gays and straights, married and single, Christians and Jews, Asian, black, Hispanic, and white, USA and foreign-born.

 

Many of them had only me in common when the day began. When we parted, contact information had been exchanged by most of them. Those few hours we shared are proof we all can get along. That the melting pot is alive and well. And that when we look past our differences, we might just discover a wonderful person who will enrich our lives.

 

I know those surrounding me that day have made me a better man and I thank them for it.

 

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11 Comments

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Mikiesboy

Mikiesboy 143,869

Posted

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Wonderful C!

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Kitt

Kitt 46,144

Posted (edited)

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That's one of the good aspects of meeting peeps through social media and becoming friends before meeting. For a good many of my online friends I have no clue of skin color, economic class, or ethnic background. While those things would not stop me from becoming friends with a good person, unfortunately there are people for whom it would be a factor, and could derail what might be a beautiful friendship before it starts.

Edited by Kitt
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Parker Owens

Parker Owens 61,810

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Carlos, you made the world smile in this entry. How wonderful the reality that you describe is. 

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Brayon

Brayon 40,934

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Your story and personal experience is a lesson of being open and inclusive. The majority of people on all sides are like that. Live and let live sorts. Sadly its the vocal minority of divisionists that people listen to, and they come in all stripes of life.

 

Thank you for sharing Carlos, and I hope what you said becomes more the norm, and less the exception.

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TetRefine

TetRefine 2,609

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The world MOST CERTAINLY needs more of this!

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Headstall

Headstall 306,127

Posted

:thumbup: ... sounds like a wonderful birthday, Carlos. We are all just humans wearing slightly different skin... I don't understand why some don't get that, but it's their loss. 

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Former Member

Former Member 5,625

Posted (edited)

I think real friends, are a gift from God, being a friend means to me that you mourn with those that mourn and rejoice with them that are rejoicing. They can correct you and you won't feel pissed off, because you know that they love and care about you.
it also means that you want your friends to succeed, to be glad when they do something and it goes well.  To support them and to sustain them in difficult times.
My friends live in The Netherlands, The UK, and the USA.
The great thing about real friends is that although you do not see each other for many years, the years simply fall away when you speak with them on the telephone, 
or better yet meet in person. You just pick up where you left off. 
My life would be very empty without the friends that I love.

Edited by Job
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Defiance19

Defiance19 28,484

Posted

❤️ Very well put, Carlos. It is so not a fantasy. 

 It would be so boring if we were all the same. This is an important lesson.  We definitely need to embrace our differences rather than let them set us apart and lose out on so much, including such amazing friendships.  

 

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Carlos Hazday

Carlos Hazday 115,514

Posted (edited)

25 minutes ago, Defiance19 said:

❤️ Very well put, Carlos. It is so not a fantasy. 

 It would be so boring if we were all the same. This is an important lesson.  We definitely need to embrace our differences rather than let them set us apart and lose out on so much, including such amazing friendships.  

 

 

Someone gave me a beautiful, leather-bound journal as a birthday present and I scribbled the basics of this entry in it on the train ride home. I smiled most of the way. That Sunday was special and if it wasn't for Springsteen on Broadway on Friday night, it would have been the highlight of the trip. Sunday had to share the honor with The Boss. I thought about you a lot while writing.

Edited by Carlos Hazday
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Defiance19

Defiance19 28,484

Posted

@Carlos Hazday It’s impossible not to think of me and smile...Im.poss.ible. 😁

That Sunday will always be special because it was the first, but I can’t wait for us to eclipse that, and then some. 

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BendtedWreath

BendtedWreath 2,065

Posted

That's beautiful. I really missed out on becoming one of your many friends, Carlos. I hope you realize, wherever you are, that you're still blazing a trail even after your passing. On behalf of everyone here that knew you and those that have yet to read your work and blogs, I thank you.

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