Character Empathy

So what is the strong adhesive that keeps people glued to a story once they start reading? What can writers do to evoke emotion and conjure up the craving needed to keep reading all the way to the end without stopping? What makes them think about your story during the day when they’re away from the internet, in the car, on the train, or even while they’re hanging out with friends? It is such a powerful skill that you can wield as a writer to have your words and your ideas actually carry over into the real world and into the lives of people that you’ve never even spoken to before. It’s an incredible feeling. I can live the rest of my life off of that happy buzz alone. Hehehe! If you’ve never tried writing before...give it a shot! It’s a thrill that you seriously can’t match with much else in your everyday life! It truly is something special!

The big question here, though, isn’t why...but HOW? What universal element can you tap into that can reach out and make contact with total strangers? They’re just words one a screen, representing emotion and reader involvement. Right? They’re not real.

Ok, first thing...lose that whole frame of mind. I mean it. Get rid of it, as it doesn’t belong here. I think a lot of writers, even the phenomenally talented ones, sell their abilities short when it comes to the question of working this kind of magic. And a great deal of that comes from not understanding the impact that well written story can have. Which means that they probably don’t read enough to study the scenes, characters, and dialogue, that touches them in the same way. Hehehe, lord knows that I don’t! I keep trying to read other people’s stories and leave comments, and my life gets so damn tangled up that I either can’t read the stories I wanted to, or I get so far behind that it’s nearly impossible to catch up to where I was in the first place. This is something that I’m desperately trying to correct within myself...so I’ll be doing better by the time you guys read this, k? It just takes me forever to do much of anything these days.

But the one thing that I think makes for an excellent story...is the woven in presence of empathy. Plain and simple. Even if and one of your readers is separated by distance, culture, religious beliefs, age, financial status...whatever. Empathy is a constant, and it is the gateway drug to everything else that you can add to your fiction. Whether it be for good or for bad or anywhere in between...empathy is the magic elixir that can make any story work and reach up to it’s fullest potential. That has been one of the most complimented and praised parts of my writing over the years. So definitely hear me out here! Because, no matter what you’re writing, no matter what genre, no matter if it’s a short story or an extended series, empathy is the skeleton key that opens all doors. Figure out how to use that magical tool in varying degrees...and your stories will always succeed in drawing in a loyal fanbase at some point. Always, no question.

So...what is empathy? We all have a pretty vague idea of what it is and what it entails, but what is it, really? I mean the dictionary definition says “The ability to understand and share the feelings of another.” Which is very simple and right to the point, so it makes a lot sense, right? But, here’s the magic trick...how can a writer ever hope to create that for the characters that they have included in their current project? I mean, no matter what your characters are going through, it’s not like you could really force a single one of your readers to give a shit from the text on the screen alone. Your entire audience has to decide whether or not they want to offer that up to you of their own free will. All you can really do is inspire them to do so. And that means stepping your game as an author to make that happen. Right?

Getting someone to empathize with your characters is a lot like introducing them to someone else at a massive party for the first time. It starts with an exchange of names and a few awkward handshakes and all, but moves into finding something a bit more relatable to talk about that goes beyond the weather outside and a few chunks of casual small talk that I’m sure we’ve all used to be somewhat social at one time or another, and then abandon all that for a conversation that impacts us on a deeper level than that once you get to know each other a bit better. Then you move into the realm of common interests….movies, music, video games, artwork, etc. In my own stories, this is something that can instantly bond two people together and start building a playful or meaningful interaction with one another. If they agree on certain things that they think is absolutely awesome...then GREAT! It takes my love interest beyond just being somebody who’s really cute, and therefore is only of a sexual interest to my main character. Not that there’s anything wrong with that...but I feel like people can read that anywhere. I want something more engaging. I want to empathize with the character and care to the point where I’m fully invested in seeing them get some kind of reward from the interaction. I want to be ‘touched’! Hehehe, get your heads out of the gutter! You know what mean!

And creating that empathy in your story comes from one thing. Intimate knowledge of your main characters, inside and out. Both their attributes and their flaws. Both their goals for the future, and their embracing of their past. Their hopes and regrets. And then finding a way to connect to that to something that is essentially familiar to every audience. Something that they can really relate to and understand. When you’re able to do this with your story...you immediately shift gears. And it’s almost like you’re no longer just telling your own story...but you’re telling their story as well. This creates an empathetic vibe between the readers and your characters that will instantly give your fiction an instant boost that it might not have without it. And this is a big plus in the ‘win’ column.

You do this best through their interaction with one another. Remember, show don’t tell. Even if you’re really great with your prose and imaginative descriptions...that can develop the plot and move the story forward, but it won’t create a sense of empathy. It can be used to introduced the characters to one another, but not to your readers. Try to avoid writing things like, “He was so shy. Soft spoken with a blush.” when you’re in the process of building them up as a character. There’s nothing wrong with that sentence, and you can effectively toss a sentence or two like that in your story later on with no problem. But during your audience’s initial introduction to that character...display their personalities in action first. Why is he shy? Show me. How is he soft spoken? Show me. Allow them to interact and ‘feel each other out’ in real time. By building that connection from the start, you begin to create empathy for anything that they may face throughout the length of the rest of your story. Having people discover an intimate knowledge of your characters is what builds the bridges needed for them to really engage with them...even if they don’t exist.

It’s sort of like having someone hand you a super cute puppy. Hehehe! How can you not fall in love with a sweet little puppy, you know? If the puppy is happy...you’re happy. If the puppy is being playful and weird...you feel playful and weird. And God forbid if anybody were to hurt it or make it whimper and cry. It doesn’t matter what’s happening at that particular moment, because your empathy is tuned in. If you’re writing romance, if you’re writing a murder mystery, if you’re writing fantasy...these stories become more exciting and more impactful through the tension and confusion created by the stakes involved. And people aren’t really invested in the stakes if their not invested in the characters dealing with them. That’s why empathy is the gateway to everything else. Because being able to have people care (Not FORCE them to care...that’s not possible, remember?) is what keeps these characters, and thus the stories themselves, so close to their hearts. And why they think about them like old friends, even when they’re not reading new chapters about their personal journey towards being happy.

Take the endearing traits, or possibly even the aggravating issues, that you want your readers to know about the people in your story...and spread them out. Leave little breadcrumbs behind for your audience to find as they piece together their own connections to the entities that you’ve created. Maybe they like them, maybe they don’t. That’s for them to decide. Your job is to make them memorable enough for them to affect the story in whichever way you see fit and have it matter. Even if readers totally loathe this character and are only sticking around to see him punished and finally get his comeuppance in the end...you can consider that a mission accomplished. Because they’re invested now, and they won’t let go until the story is over. And if you really want to up the stress factor...take the empathy that you’ve built up for the other characters in the story and how much pain and damage this one asshole has done to them. Hehehe, it’s a negative emotion...but it works. Just try not to ruin everybody’s day TOO often with your story! You don’t want them going off the deep end...because they will be thinking about it. So don’t make them too miserable, k? Throw a few puppy dog moments in there every now and then to balance things out. Think of it as a stressful mind massage.

Bottom line, creating a sense of empathy in your stories is just a matter of making your fictional characters and you critical readers feel as if their of one mind. Bring them together and get them as close to one another as humanly possible. They should feel as though everything that is going on in your narrative is happening to them. Or, at the very least, to a good friend. And since the most intersting part of any story is its struggle and its conflict...you want to tug on their emotions and get them to feel it too. You can figure out your own methods on the most comfortable and natural ways for this to work for you, personally. Just know the goal, pick your method of travel, and allow your instincts to take you there.

That’s my piece for today, ladies and gentlemen! Hehehe! Hope it puts you in the right frame of mind and gives you some ideas! Take care! And, as always...stay beautiful!