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The lights are on...

AFriendlyFace

Entry posted by AFriendlyFace

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But there's really no one home.

 

 

My attention span and short-term memory seem to be getting progressively worse with each passing day. I'm lucky to finish sentences nevermind multi-step tasks. It was always something I just sorta blew off before. "Oh I'm just absent-minded", "it's just another quirky aspect of my personality"...but it's getting worse, and it's starting to actually bother me.

 

I lost money again at work today...it's about the 5th time (that I know of) that it's happened since I've started. There are other people who have been there years and never lost any. I still have no clue how I'm doing it. It doesn't make sense either; at my last job I was the fastest, most accurate cashier. All I can guess is that there's just too many completely different things going on at once, or else that I'm just less careful in general since it's my money and not the company's.

 

LOL, and goodness knows I'm not particularly careful with my own money. I'm lucky to go three days without buying some new article of clothing. And eating out? I'm lucky to go one day without eating at least one of my meals in a restaurant. Anyway, I've got to put a break on my spending...I get the impression my friends might hold an intervention soon otherwise :blink:

 

So getting back to the point: I can't FOCUS! I lost a belt too. I mean granted I have so many it probably seems like it would be hard to keep track of them all anyway, but actually I'm pretty well-organized and tidy around the house (probably as some sort of compensating mechanism - I just can't handle clutter and disarray). That belt, like every other belt, shoe, shirt, and pair of pants, had a specific place in one of the closets that it's supposed to occupy. It isn't there, it isn't visting any of the belts nor is it hanging out in the dirty laundry with the pants...it's just gone. I mean how does one actually LOSE a belt? Not that it's the first piece of clothing that's gone inexplicably missing. I mean it's very easy for me to lose stuff in general. I just put it down then wander off, but with clothing I'm generally aware of removing them from my body, and I don't generally do that in public places (if it happens in someone's home presumably they'd run across the item and, upon seeing me the next time, say something to the effect of "hey scatterbrain, you left without your shoes the other night"). Anyway I just don't quite understand how bits of clothing just go missing periodically. My primary checkbook has been MIA for the last 6 or 7 months.

 

Anyway, I'm seriously beginning to worry. In the past couple of months I've wandered away from sinks with the water running, FREQUENTLY prepared things for cooking/washing/cleaning etc. only to fail to turn the actual appliance on. "Gee these veggies are taking forever to cook!...ohh well perhaps if I turned the stove on". How I've managed to avoid having a car accident is beyond me. I am NOT focused enough to be behind the wheel of a highspeed vehicle. I mean I think I'm too much of a space cadet to drive, but I can't exactly not drive; it's pretty much a requirement of modern life, particularly if you are a young, single, working person. It's fine for an 80 year old to say "I just didn't think I should be driving anymore", but when a twenty-something year old says it people think he's nuts!

 

The most frustrating times aren't those in which I misplace things, or even when I forget an important step in an everyday activity; the most frustrating times are those in which I'm really trying to focus, trying to remember what I needed to do or say and can't.

 

I really am worried. I'm getting enough sleep, my mood is good, I'm eating heathily and yet, for lack of a better term, I'm getting senile. Worse considering the frustration that comes when I try to focus and can't, walking around in a happy, foggy daze is not only getting easier to do, it's also getting more tempting. It's almost like I'm giving up. For years I struggled to keep my mind on the matter at hand, now I'm content to let it flit about wherever it deems appealing. What if one day I wander into my own little world and don't come back at all?

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viv

I'm sure there is a good explanation for what you are going through and a way to fix it that isn't too imposing... and I think that you're absolutely right by noticing that you have these compensationg defense mechanisms you have developed in order to deal with it.

 

Another thing to consider is that before you were always much more occupied with things you HAD to focus on in order to be successful, like you had classes and youhad to stay focused and organized and 'on task' and now you have work and that's about it (I think) and so maybe the reason you are noticing it more now is because you have more time to be less focused....

 

Anyway Foxy :wub: if you do have your own little world... can I come visit? I'd sure miss you like crazy!

 

Hugs, Viv

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Coming Undone

Hi Kevin

 

Admitting there is a problem is the first step to recovery. :lmao:

 

As for the clothing you probably have too much already, but restaurant food all the time will kill you.

Money? Put that in the restaurant category but in a different way.

 

I haven't got any sage words but I hope you get a handle on this.

 

Eric :devil:

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old bob
Sounds like ADD. See your doctor. Sharon

Hey Kevin !

I would also say so.

The symptoms of AD :

1. Failure to pay close attention to details or making careless mistakes when doing schoolwork or other activities

2. Trouble keeping attention focused during play or tasks

3. Appearing not to listen when spoken to

4. Failure to follow instructions or finish tasks

5. Avoiding tasks that require a high amount of mental effort and organization,

6. Frequently losing items required to facilitate tasks or activities,

7. Excessive distractibility

8. Forgetfulness

9. Procrastination, inability to begin an activity

10. Difficulties with household activities (cleaning, paying bills, etc.)

11. Difficulty falling asleep, may be due to too many thoughts at night

12. Frequent emotional outbursts

13. Easily frustrated

14. Easily distracted

 

How do you feel now ?

Take care, really !

Old bob

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AFriendlyFace
:hug:

:hug: aww thanks Camy!

 

Sounds like ADD. See your doctor.

 

Sharon

Hey Sharon :)

 

Actually I don't have a doctor. Never got one after I moved :wacko:

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AFriendlyFace

Hey Viv! :D

 

Another thing to consider is that before you were always much more occupied with things you HAD to focus on in order to be successful, like you had classes and youhad to stay focused and organized and 'on task' and now you have work and that's about it (I think) and so maybe the reason you are noticing it more now is because you have more time to be less focused....

Hmm, I hadn't thought of that!! That's a very good point!

 

Anyway Foxy :wub: if you do have your own little world... can I come visit? I'd sure miss you like crazy!

awww of course you can, Viv! I'll make the leprechaun sleep in the stables with the monkeys and you can have his summer cottage :D

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AFriendlyFace

Hey Eric!

Hi Kevin

 

Admitting there is a problem is the first step to recovery. :lmao:

HAHAHA

As for the clothing you probably have too much already, but restaurant food all the time will kill you.

Money? Put that in the restaurant category but in a different way.

Hmm, yes I think they call that "death by chocolate". Tragic yes, but what I way to go! :P:boy:

I haven't got any sage words but I hope you get a handle on this.

Thanks! I'm really going to try! LOL Okay I admit it I spent the day shopping and ate out twice :*) ,,,,but this was like totally my going away binge 0:)

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AFriendlyFace

Hey Old Bob!

 

Thanks for the list! Very helpful :D

 

Let's see:

 

The symptoms of AD :

 

 

1. Failure to pay close attention to details or making careless mistakes when doing schoolwork or other activities

Hmm, this one is a definite maybe. Depends on my mood.

 

2. Trouble keeping attention focused during play or tasks

Pretty much another maybe, also depends on my mood

 

3. Appearing not to listen when spoken to

No, I don't think so. I do pay attention to other people pretty well.

 

4. Failure to follow instructions or finish tasks

Hmm, yes and no. I often do get distracted in the middle of tasks, but sometimes I "blow them off" on purpose.

 

5. Avoiding tasks that require a high amount of mental effort and organization,

No, I don't do that. I like the challenge, find it stimulating.

 

6. Frequently losing items required to facilitate tasks or activities,

Yep, that I do.

7. Excessive distractibility

uh huh

8. Forgetfulness

Yeah

9. Procrastination, inability to begin an activity

No more than most people.

10. Difficulties with household activities (cleaning, paying bills, etc.)

Sometimes yes, sometiems no

 

11. Difficulty falling asleep, may be due to too many thoughts at night

Definitely NOT! I usually fall asleep BEFORE I want to. I like to lay around in bed and think before I go to sleep, but I usually drift off too quickly. I never have any trouble falling asleep or staying asleep.

12. Frequent emotional outbursts

Not "outbursts", but occassionally I feel very emotional and can't figure out why. I can usually surpress it or express it appropriately though.

 

13. Easily frustrated

Nope, I'm pretty unflappable actually

 

14. Easily distracted

Yeah

 

How do you feel now ?

Somewhat distracted and spacey actually :wacko:

 

Thanks again for the list, Bob! That did help give me some perspective! :D

 

Actually if it's not too much to ask, if someone who knows they don't have ADD or attention problems happens to read this, could they answer the symptoms as well so that I can compare? Thanks

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