Communication problems on the Internet

[Graeme]

There is one thing that has saddened me several times in the years that I've been using the Internet, and that is the way that the communications can be so damaging and hurtful.

 

Most of the time, I find the Internet to be supportive and encouraging, but there are times when it causes anger and fights.

 

I'm interested in what people see as the reason for this.

 

What I've observed so far are:

 

Miscommunications:

I've seen studies that indicate most people receive something like 60% of their communication non-verbally. For example, if you switch off the sound on most movies, you will still have a fair idea of the plot, but if you turn off the picture, it is a lot harder to work out what is going on.

 

Since most internet communication is a written form of speech, we are missing out on that 60%, as well as missing out on the tones and emphasis that characterises speech. Thus, it is easy to take offense at something that was supposed to be sarcastic, but was interpreted literally. Recent communications with someone who has Aspergers Syndrome has emphasised this point to me.

 

I don't know how many arguments I've been in where the underlying cause has been a simple difference in definition of a key term. This has happened to me enough in face-to-face communications -- it's even easier to do in online communication.

Anonymity:

Because there is a veneer of anonymity on the Internet, people are more likely to say something that they wouldn't say in person. Even without the anonymity, I know personally it is often easier to say something via email than it is face-to-face (especially when you are telling someone 'NO').

 

There have been studies that show people tend to be more open and honest on the Internet than in real life, though naturally there are also those that are more likely to lie and deceive. Are the online fights/arguments sometimes a case of being more brutally honest than would be the case if you could see the person in question and how what you are saying affects them?

 

Culture:

Less frequent, but increasing in prevalence, is misunderstandings due to a difference in cultures. This is something that has always been around, but the Internet is bringing together people from around the world and cultural clashes occur as a consequence. Some cultures tend to speak more openly than others, while some can be very circumspect with criticism. Bringing these cultures together can cause problems. Unless we are aware of these differences, simple matters can be blown out of proportion.

 

Comments?

[BeaStKid]

i've noticed this too... on many occasions i've refrained from typing something because when read as it is, it sounded offensive and could have hurt the other person's feelings. But when i say the same thing, it can be taken in a joking manner.

 

The problem lies with the absence of speech vectors while typing. We can still emphasize some things by making the text bold or with emoticons, but it is not sufficient. Speech vectors enables a speaker to communicate efficiently.

 

E.g. Try the different way you can use/say f***k in various situations....The sentence is the same but with the correct tone, the meaning changes---

 

What the f***k? (Horror)

What the f***k? (disbelief)

What the f***k? (question)

 

Now, if anyone was to read this without the situations in the brackets, they all would appear the same. Hence the skills required for internet communication have to be honed over time. The typing thing also limits the use of speech vectors. So, one needs to come up with sentences that puts the point across (the correct one, that is) and does not sound offending when read.

 

Just my two cents

 

BSK

[Menzoberranzen]

Communication problems are definitely issues online, especially when it comes to sarcasm/jokes. And yes, people do tend to be more honest online. There is definitely something easier about admitting something to people you've never met than to someone you know personally. I don't share my writing with people in 'real' life, but I don't mind posting it on the internet. It's that one step of removal from personal dealings that changes the dynamic so much. For me, however, I'm much less likely to be blunt with my comments online, because there is no opportunity to explain myself in the same way. For that same reason, I am much more comfortable raising delicate issues in person, because I can minimize the risk of misunderstandings between myself and the other person.

 

All in all, I find online communication to be useful and effective, except when it comes to sensitive issues and sarcasm, where, as BSK mentioned, the context of a remark is sometimes ambiguous.

 

PS

What the f***k

Since when does F**k have 5 letters?

[colinian]

I took a web design class in 11th grade. One of our projects was to evaluate email messages we sent to and received from friends, relatives, our parents, and commercial senders. Many of the same points Graeme made were to be included in our analysis of well and poorly written email messages. We were to provide the text of messages that we received and had misinterpreted, and email messages that we sent and had been misinterpreted especially if an unfriendly reply had been received. We then had to analyze each message, and what in the content caused misinterpretation. It was a fun project. Examples of messages and replies were shown by the kids in the class, and some were pretty funny. Our conclusions were:

1. When writing email messages, people are sloppy in every aspect of grammar, spelling, punctuation, word order, sentence construction, leaving out words, using the wrong word -- name any convention, and it's probably violated in most email messages.
   
2. People either don't use the spell checker in their email program, or use email programs that don't have spell checkers. And they don't know how to spell or are sloppy when keying their messages.
   
3. People don't edit what they've written in an email message before clicking "Send".
   
4. People sometimes click "Reply to All" when they didn't intend to, causing a lot of embarrassment.
   
5. People don't read email messages carefully, leading to misinterpretation of what's actually written in the message.
   

There were a lot of other conclusions, but those are the ones that were identified as the most important.

 

BTW, the same factors apply to forum posts.

 

 

Colin

[Ieshwar]

Yeah, I completely agree with Graeme. When you talk with someone face-to-face, you can see their body language, tone and so one and understand better what they're saying.

 

Are the online fights/arguments sometimes a case of being more brutally honest than would be the case if you could see the person in question and how what you are saying affects them?

 

Most probably yes! I mean, with the advantage of anonymity, you tend to defend your causes (sexuality, colour...) more fiercely. Like if someone from internet starts raving about gays being abomination blah blah blah, I will surely give him my piece of thoughts and where he can shove his opinions. But had it been someone face-to-face, I wouldn't have been brave enough to do it, perhaps even if I was out.

 

But is this a communication problem? I don't think so.

 

Talking about "definition of a key term", it's definitely more probable to occur online coz not all of us has a deep knowledge of the language. In US, Uk, Australia, you guys talk and live in English but guys like me don't. English is a learnt subject. Not everyone here would be able to converse fluently in English! When chatting ore exchaging views online, small misunderstandings are bound to occur, especially if defending oneself.

 

Ieshwar

[BeaStKid]

Since when does F**k have 5 letters?

Typos....they can be soooo annoying...lol

 

BSK