C James Posted November 17, 2006 Share Posted November 17, 2006 Chapter 4 is up entitled 'Sanctuary.' For those of you who read 'JJ and The Boys'; they're back. https://www.gayauthors.org/eficiton/viewstory.php?sid=161 If you read it please leave a comment. Positive or negative, I'm not proud. Cheers, Camy Very clever!! We still don't know much about Valerian, and I'm really curious about Nick now. Great job, Camy!! More please!! Link to comment
Camy Posted November 19, 2006 Author Share Posted November 19, 2006 Very clever!! We still don't know much about Valerian, and I'm really curious about Nick now. Great job, Camy!! More please!! Thanks CJ! There's not a lot I can tell you without giving the game away .... Camy Link to comment
C James Posted November 19, 2006 Share Posted November 19, 2006 Thanks CJ! There's not a lot I can tell you without giving the game away .... Camy I know exactly how that goes, Camy! I have a similar quandry quite often with my story. So, is this where I should start to holler "next chapter! next chapter NOW!!"? I hope we see more of Nick! Link to comment
Ieshwar Posted November 25, 2006 Share Posted November 25, 2006 Wow! that story rocks! I'm not into mysteries much but this one is really wonderful. I started yesterday and read all the 4 chapters without any break. i was hooked till the last word. I ahve never such a good mystery story after Josh Aterovis's Kilian series. Wanting more! Ieshwar Link to comment
DarkShadow Posted November 25, 2006 Share Posted November 25, 2006 Hey, Shannon, well, I'll take all the "best wishes" I can get, but I'm in good health, thank heavens. Except for apparently needing to pull my head out of ... *ahem* ... you know . I thought I had sent the final edit of Chapter 3 back to Camy over a week ago, and had been wondering why he hadn't posted it by now. Last night, he emailed me and said, very nicely, " ... erm ... where the heck is it?" Ooops. Kitty LOL Don't feel bad. I've been sitting here thinking to myself... I wonder how long it will take Sharon to get through with chapter 2 of MR, but just realized... heheheh I don't think I've sent it to her yet! WOO HOO! Bleach my hair and call me blond! Wait never mind... I'm just too messed up in the head to remember sending it. I found it... hmmm Drain Bamage! Link to comment
Camy Posted November 25, 2006 Author Share Posted November 25, 2006 Wow! that story rocks! I'm not into mysteries much but this one is really wonderful. I started yesterday and read all the 4 chapters without any break. i was hooked till the last word. I ahve never such a good mystery story after Josh Aterovis's Kilian series. Wanting more! Ieshwar Thank you so much, being mentioned in the same breath as Josh Aterovis is high praise indeed. Chapter 5 is on the way. Camy Link to comment
DarkShadow Posted November 25, 2006 Share Posted November 25, 2006 (I just got done reading the newest chapters) One word Camy MORE! I freaking love it! I need to get me a tutor! This is definately... INTENSE! Link to comment
Camy Posted November 25, 2006 Author Share Posted November 25, 2006 (I just got done reading the newest chapters) One word Camy MORE! I freaking love it! I need to get me a tutor! This is definately... INTENSE! Tutor? You, hahaha. Don't think so. As for 'I freaking love it' - can't tell you how happy that makes me ... except Cheers! Link to comment
Camy Posted November 25, 2006 Author Share Posted November 25, 2006 OMG CAMY!!! I love it! I just read the first chapter, and for the first time in months I found myself speed-reading to find out what happened next!!! AMAZING!Birds WOW! But, but, but if you speed read, you won't catch all those commas, semi-colons and adverbs Kitty and I have bickered and sweated over. Thanks Birds. Camy Link to comment
DarkShadow Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 WOW! But, but, but if you speed read, you won't catch all those commas, semi-colons and adverbs Kitty and I have bickered and sweated over. Thanks Birds. Camy You listen to Miss Kitty Every comma, semi-colon, and adverb is paramount. Trust Miss Kitty... she knows best Link to comment
Camy Posted November 27, 2006 Author Share Posted November 27, 2006 You listen to Miss Kitty Every comma, semi-colon, and adverb is paramount. Trust Miss Kitty... she knows best She certainly does, and I always do. My fingers are sore from adverb removal duty... Camy Link to comment
Camy Posted December 2, 2006 Author Share Posted December 2, 2006 shouldn't that be *flaps* rather than *frolics*? Link to comment
DarkShadow Posted December 2, 2006 Share Posted December 2, 2006 I'm still loving this Camy! I really enjoyed chapter 4! One thing though... and only one... "extemporized" I looked it up... (well I hadn't read this word before and I love to learn new words) lol Here is the definition I found: 'to speak extemporaneously' Ohhh yeah... that lead to another word look up lol I've finally surmised that this means "to speak without thinking or forethought" LOVE the story, LOVE the editor, and I would LOVE to see chapter 5! (*hint, hint*) I really do love this place I learn more and more every day! Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted December 6, 2006 Share Posted December 6, 2006 OK, I'll review before I read others' opinions. I really enjoyed a lot the first two chapters. I loved the setting up of the adventure story, and the whole Nick/ Gabe thing, with all the mystery surrounding the tutor. All the other characters (relatives, friends...) are really good. The dialogues flow easily, the general tone is light and playful, with all the hints and foreshadowing that make me want to read further. The rescue in (and out) of the Mc Donald's is great. I have more trouble buying the whole sanctuary episode. I thought it was the final chapter (dumb me, I could have read it wasn't) so I was really eager to know the end. It's still as playful, but it seems to me to be dragging up a bit, with not many answers as to what this mysterious organization does. The whole "besotted with Martin" part is fun as a part, but from my POV it's a bit annoying plot-wise. It reminds me of the SAS series (fascist French spy novels from the 60s and 70s), in which the hero had three different women in every book. So I'll certainly be eager to read chapter 5, because I like your characters, and your style is extremely entertaining. Oh, darn, I forgot to rate it as I read! I'll go back to give a 9 to chapter 1&2, an 8 to ch. 3 and a 7.5 to ch. 4! (Isn't it strange to consider a story chapter by chapter?) Link to comment
Camy Posted December 10, 2006 Author Share Posted December 10, 2006 OK, I'll review before I read others' opinions.I really enjoyed a lot the first two chapters. I loved the setting up of the adventure story, and the whole Nick/ Gabe thing, with all the mystery surrounding the tutor. All the other characters (relatives, friends...) are really good. The dialogues flow easily, the general tone is light and playful, with all the hints and foreshadowing that make me want to read further. The rescue in (and out) of the Mc Donald's is great. I have more trouble buying the whole sanctuary episode. I thought it was the final chapter (dumb me, I could have read it wasn't) so I was really eager to know the end. It's still as playful, but it seems to me to be dragging up a bit, with not many answers as to what this mysterious organization does. The whole "besotted with Martin" part is fun as a part, but from my POV it's a bit annoying plot-wise. It reminds me of the SAS series (fascist French spy novels from the 60s and 70s), in which the hero had three different women in every book. So I'll certainly be eager to read chapter 5, because I like your characters, and your style is extremely entertaining. Oh, darn, I forgot to rate it as I read! I'll go back to give a 9 to chapter 1&2, an 8 to ch. 3 and a 7.5 to ch. 4! (Isn't it strange to consider a story chapter by chapter?) Thanks for reading and the review, Bondwriter. I like the scoring idea a lot! FYI 'The Boys' come from an earlier short story 'JJ and The Boys' Chapter five is finished and is ready to upload, but due to a computer crash I've lost the codes for efiction ... bummer, though I'm sure I'll find them sooner rather than later. Camy Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted December 10, 2006 Share Posted December 10, 2006 You're welcome! I'll go check out JJ and his friends at awesome dude. Looking back, I think grades/ rating with numbers are kind of strange. Giving one-dimensional value to fictions that are so multi-dimensional. And it sounds a bit like a grade report... I hope it's more helful and heart-warming than "Cool story"! Link to comment
Camy Posted December 10, 2006 Author Share Posted December 10, 2006 Finally I've managed to post chapter 5. Hope you all enjoy it! Rip roaring mayhem kicks off in chapter six as 'things' begin to get much darker ... will the light of true love and friendship see them through I wonder? Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted December 11, 2006 Share Posted December 11, 2006 OK, I shouldn't have written what I wrote in the previous post about different relationships and stuff. It's all for the plot. Then it's tough to comment on any plot issue. I'm just really eager to read the next part, and man! how I wish I could read on paper rather than onscreen. I'm really not used to long fiction in electronic format. (Not very helpful review, is it? ) Link to comment
Camy Posted December 16, 2006 Author Share Posted December 16, 2006 OK, I shouldn't have written what I wrote in the previous post about different relationships and stuff. It's all for the plot. Then it's tough to comment on any plot issue. Of course you should, that's what this thread is for. Comment away, and know it makes my heart sing to read them (how's that for poetic). I'm just really eager to read the next part, and man! how I wish I could read on paper rather than onscreen. I'm really not used to long fiction in electronic format. (Not very helpful review, is it? ) 'Eager to read the next part' is good, nay, most excellent!!! If anyone wants to print my stuff out, please feel free. I know some authors don't like it, but I can't see a problem provided you shred it afterwards - bwahaha! Chapter 6 is being edited Camy Link to comment
Camy Posted December 20, 2006 Author Share Posted December 20, 2006 Regarding Seraph... Firstly, I want to apologise to those who are fed up with the less than regular posting ... sorry! Having now finished my 'Winter Anthology' story, I am concentrating on Seraph. I've just finished chapter eight, and am hopefully going to have the final four chapters complete, except for editing, by early new year. Once edited they'll be posted on a weekly basis. Thanks, Camy Link to comment
Camy Posted January 4, 2007 Author Share Posted January 4, 2007 Chapter six is up ... it begins to get much darker. Link to comment
C James Posted January 4, 2007 Share Posted January 4, 2007 Chapter six is up ... it begins to get much darker. I'm not caught up yet, but this is one heck of a good story, Camy!!! Link to comment
shadowgod Posted January 5, 2007 Share Posted January 5, 2007 ACKKK!!! Im two chapters behind... Thank goodness the holidays are over and I can get back to some sort of normalcy! Steve Link to comment
Bondwriter Posted January 5, 2007 Share Posted January 5, 2007 Darn! It is getting darker indeed... With me liking happy endings, I hope I won't be disappointed... But well, as long as the story keeps being told the way it is, I'll abide. Link to comment
C James Posted January 6, 2007 Share Posted January 6, 2007 That is kinda dark! One heck of a good read, as always, Camy!!!! Can't wait to see where you go with this! Link to comment
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