[Dezlboi] A Letter to Jon...

[Dezlboi]

This was an unexpected one. But sometimes, writing comes unbidden, and sometimes you just gotta let some of those feelings out.

 

You can find it on my story page, which is here.

 

-Dez

[Camy]

Poignant to the brink of tears.

 

Please remove the line in your profile that says 'writing badly...'

[Formosa]

take one last glance over at you, drink in the vision of youthful manhood that you embody, and then suppress and compartmentalize all of these feelings one more time.

 

Wow...

It's been a while since I last read anything on GA, and I must say I'm glad I started again!

 

possible spoiler~!!

 

This letter sort of reminded me of the situation in 'The Boy', where similarly this older man is infatuated with a younger youth. Again, it's so full of emotions, longing that can't be expressed openly because of embarrasment and taboos. Which I guess probably makes the letter even more powerful than if the emotions were able to be openly expressed; as J says, writing is a sort of purging process to deal with feelings bottled up once and for all.

 

I really like how the 'broken' state of J is described, with references to mechanical things like cogs, whereas Jon's descriptions are by contrast so deep and vivid (the smallest detail of his pupils, the sound of his chuckle, the look of his hair). And the clever use of 'space' between J and Jon, who are so close, but at the same time so far, far away really brings out the distance between them.

 

Great work, especially a sudden spur of the moment thing...but then again those are the best of inspirations!

 

Btw, just saw your site and it's

[Dezlboi]

Thank you for the feedback, both of you.

 

Formosa - I find it a little unnerving that someone is familiar enough with my writing to draw comparisons between two different works. I didn't think anyone paid that much attention. Just kidding.

 

There are two important difference between "The boy" and this letter: 1) "The boy" is pure fiction, where this letter is partially non-fiction; 2) "Jon" in the letter is of legal age; "the boy" is decidedly not. The taboos certainly exist in both, certainly.

 

Anyway - I have a feeling there will be more to come, if you're interested.

 

-Dez