Sometimes life can be bluefish ironic.
My dad's bedroom door was ajar and the cats went to fight on the bed so I went to separated them. That's how I saw that he's thrown away absolutely all of my mom's things. Nothing is left in the wardrobe or bathroom. Nada. This week he's been doing some tidying and sorting but I thought it was his stuff and some old stuff of her. Thing is he didn't even told me, consult me or asked me if I wanted to keep a few things. It's all gone.
The irony? At the same time I got a text from him - cause yeah he only told me this afternoon he wouldn't be here and I'd be alone - wishing me a "happy new year full of joy and success".
I've been thinking a lot lately and I can't keep getting hurt like that. I can't keep waiting for a gesture, a look or even just a word from him I'll never get. The times we tried to talk he stayed on his positions, getting defensive even and not listening to how I feel so I think I'll write him a letter and I won't be coming back to the house except if I really really need to. I'm not cutting ties, he's the only parent I have left, but right now it hurts more than stepping away will.
I don't want to let the last couple of year dictate my future life. I want to get better, to be better.