Chaz

I found something unique in this place. I found people that cared enought about you that they asked if you were alright, that they supported you when you needed them to. I think that most of the people come here because of the stories but most stay because of the community this place offers. I couldnt have made it throught the past few months if it wasnt for some of the people that come here also. So I think we should all be grateful that this place exists. I know I am and i wouldn't have it any other way. Chaz

I just wanted to say Happy Thanksgiving to everyone. CHAZ

It amazes me the hypocracy and denial of some christian americans. Why couldn't he come out happily like Neil Patrick Harris and be like, hey I did a mistake and apologize with dignity. No He'd rather bash his own persuasion so he can later on like an idiot decide that he no longer can live his life like a straight man. We all know this will happen eventually. The sad part is that I find the prostitute more interesting than he is.

Congratulations James. I hope you have many more because you are a great person and you deserve the best. Chaz

wow I love this story already. its so good I cant wait for more. Chaz

You guys think thats bad. Check this out. Gen pets This really creeps me out and it's not even real.

Happy birthday Bev. Here is to many more... Chaz

Happy birthday Michael. I hope you've had a wonderful day. Chaz

Green had designed that one. He took it out of the competition.

It amazes me how many people knew Green. Today as I sit here getting ready to let him go forever I realize that losing him will never compare to anything else that can come or has passed. Just hearing that doctor say I'm sorry will forever be implanted in my head. So many people have come and gone through this house today that it unnerves me. I can't face them not now. At the funeral service I found myself more concerned with his family than myself. His mother is devastated and so are his fathers. David however is taking it the hardest. There hasn't been a point where he isn't crying. It occurs to me that Green wasn't just mine. He belonged to everyone that was a part of his life. He touched so many people. Selene and I just sat away. We are both still in shock. He was taken away from us so quickly. There are so many things I wanted to say and I wasn't allowed to. I never got the chance. His mother had to sneak me into the icu just so I could see my boyfriend in the worst condition. I want to thank all of you guys for everything. Your kind words mean a lot to me. I am going to be away for a while. Things here have to settle you know? Plus I am going to move back home for the summer. I will be back though, I promise. CHAZ

Guys greeen passed away this afternoon. I just wanted to let you guys know. Chaz

Guys I finally got to see Green. He doesn't look good guys. They have him on a respirator and it seems like he's getting worse. He flatlined twice already and they don't know how much more they can do. I don't want to lose him guys. I can't see him like this. He doesn't deserve this. The doctors already told his parents to look into funeral services. I just want to scream right now to wake him up. Chaz

Hi guys thanks for your thoughts. Um Green is still in ICU. They won't tell me anything and Green's mother hasn't come out of the room in a long time. His father left crying before I could ask him anything. David is doing better but he still doesn't remember what happened. One of the cops told me that there might have been some foul play in this. They think that whoever called the cops might have been involved. I don't know what to do. The nurses don't want me here and the doctors won't talk to me. I just want someone to tell me that he is going to be alright you know? I'll keep you posted guys. CHAZ

Hi guys I just want to fill you in on what's going on. Um Green and David were in a car accident last night. David has a broken collar bone and a pretty nasty cut on the side of his head. Green is not doing to well. He's in icu right now. David doesn't remember what happened. They found Green's car in the breakdown lane on it's side. Green was hanging from his seatbelt unconscious. Green is in a comma and they don't know how much more they can do. I just wanted to let you guys know. Sorry I'm writing this from a cellphone and it's my only release. Chaz

I came home a couple of hours ago. Green and the kid were seated on the floor with big headphones listening to music. Green makes me angry some times I will admit. Before he took this kid in he called me and told me he was doing it. He didn't really ask me he just said he was doing it. I know this is his house ultimately but I feel like he and I are a team right now. I think it's great that he can help this kid and I find myself helping the kid too it's just well I would be nice just to be asked. I mean maybe I am being overdramatic here but what's it going to be like when we get married. I want to know that he's going to trust me. I want to know that I can trust him like I do right now forever. If he cant trust me is it worth it for us to even be together? Well I am talking to him now and I told him these in explicit detail. Yes we're good now. Thanks guys and please keep your questions coming. GREEN + CHAZ - COUCH

My boyfriend it seems has fallen of the face of the earth. He left late last night and hasn't returned. SO if anybody has seen him tell him to get butt home or it's over between us. I hope this isn't one of his disappearing fits. Green if you are reading this wth! Oh alright on another note I wanted to update you guys on our lives. My mother is a psycho apparently the white horse thing is her idea. I want to puke (Green did) all over this idea. We need some more questions we were hoping on ten good ones so ask them peoples. Selene thinks she's planning the bachelor party but since we lost control of our own ceremony that is not going to happen. She had some idea including some dancers. You will be glad to know that Julio and I have peace. He and I went out for lunch today and we spoke extensively about everything. He told me that he was so jealous of me. He also told me something that i didn't know. He knew that I was better for Green than he was and that at some point he had convinced himself of this so he took off. He also told me that he would always love Green but he would never come between us and that I shouldn't worry about that because he loves his current boyfriend. My brother is doing well with the guy Green Knows. They have been dating and it seems like they will cross become boyfriends if they aren't already. My older brother is dating the bartender now and I couldn't be happier. David and Steve had their first real fight but it was so cute because withing ten minutes they were both apologizing. Rob and the creepy guy have broken up. We know this because everyone at our school knows it as it happened with full flair at the student union. God that was so funny. Green didn't think so and he walked away but you couldn't tear David and me from there. As for us we're happy. LOL when he's here that is. CHAZ + GREEN

I cant do this anymore, it's killing me! I see it on Green's face he misses this blog. It's like his own personal diary and I know he misses it. I know we decided to not post here anymore but I don't think that is fair for either of us. Plus I want to tell you guys how we got engaged. Alright So I Miss It Too, sue me. So we're coming back and we would really like to do this Q and A session so please PM some or add them here. (Remember no questions pertaining to our bedroom or where we live and go to school. We wont answer those) WE LOVE YOU GUYS and we really would like to come back if you would have us... CHAZ + GREEN

My life was uneventful and very boring until Green came along. I used to be this shy kid that had a close nit friendship with a couple of people I've known since kindergarten. I used to be a goth (thank god I grew out of that because it really didn't suit me) with black hair and I loved to blend in the shadows. I used to love to just read myself into oblivion, then I meet the one person that changes my life. He leads me down a path of happiness and fear, or should I say emotional roller coaster of love and trust including some rough points that stretch us to the edge and back. Today at lunch I thought about how much I love him as he embarrassed the hell out of me. He in one of his acts of Genius (see previous posts) dropped a whole plate of lasagna on my white shirt. This was of course followed by his insistence that he can eat it all back up which he proceeds to do by sliding under the table and coming up between my legs. Then as the manager kicks us out with a few choice words he tries to undress me in the middle of the street. So now as my boyfriend (soon to be ex if he keeps undressing me in public ) sits watching me from the other side of the table, I contemplate how lucky I am to still have him here alive and healthy. I remember that night we went to see his family and we ended fighting his cousins. I truly felt like he and I were a team. Then that night we spent in that hotel room watching that guy who was missing his piece dance for that old couple. I wanted to kiss him so badly that night, I wanted him to be mine. Of course he belonged to someone else that night. I am writing this because I am so very grateful right now. Grateful that he is going to be around for us to have a real heartfelt and meaningful relationship. I know it's only been five months but I am ready to be with him for the rest of my life. He is looking at me right now but he doesn't know I am writing this and he has ice cream on his shirt LOL. The first time I kissed him was the easiest thing I had ever done but when he ignored me after that my heart broke. I wasn't right with myself. My mother told me to fight for him. My father told me that If I didn't get him they were going to disown me. So I did and now he is mine. Then there was his whole disappearance thing (Oh he better not do that again or I will be forced to make him commit suicide) that had me worried until yesterday when they told me that everything is alright and his tumors are not cancerous. I read what he had posted the other day and I wanted to kill him. "How could he," I thought. I felt betrayed over this and I thank everyone out there that told my boyfriend Green that he was being a big idiot. I want to be there when he needs me as he's here when all of us need him. Believe it or not David actually took this harder than me and I got kicked out of my dorm over this. David was so angry that he really wanted to move. He almost really did even though we did it to teach him a lesson. Now this whole Selene thing will not get me to leave my man. We have called it a truce somewhat but I know how she feels and she knows how I feel. Chaz I don't know, I love him...

Hi guys and thanks. Green is at the hospital right now. His mom is with him. Um I dont know how to say this but the doctors are concerned about this a bit more than they should be right now. They want to keep him for a few days longer and they fear that one of the smaller tumors might be cancerous. I just wanted to keep you guys updated he has his laptop with him so he'll be able to see everything you've posted. Again, thanks you guys. Chaz

Every one seems distant today. Green is off studying for one of his projects. I asked David if he wanted to catch a movie with me today. He said he had already seen it with Steve. I was going to ask if he wanted to go get lunch and he said that he had plans to do just that With Steve. He did ask if I wanted to come, but I said no because I didn't want to a third wheel. I think Selene still hates me so I'm not going there. I called my friend and he said he's coming but now I look at that as a bad Idea. He's going to come into my home looking for a reason to bash Green. It's not that Green has anything to be ashamed of. This house is actually very nice and Green is a neat freak. So you can imagine. He's not allowed In Dave's room anymore. Not that David's dirty but Green will look for dust under the floorboards LOL. So I am contemplating telling my friend to meet me somewhere else. I Mean Green was nothing more than civil with him. I heard later on from one of my other friends and by reading what Green had written what had really happened. I just wanted them to like Green as much as I do. This makes me like my boyfriend so much more. He never made come close to his friends I just did without much effort I might add. They took me in as one of their own as I Imagine Green does with their significant others. I come to realize that my friends are a bunch of judgemental snobs. They are so miserable in their own lives that they have to try and make every one else just as miserable. I am going to tell my friend this. If he wants to be my friend he's going to have to change his attitude. Chaz

Alright you guys can hate me. I know I hate myself for doing what I did. Trust me I thought I was going to have to beg Green everyday this week for forgiveness. I read the blog last night and I almost ran over to him but I know he wasn't going to talk to me. I mean I had to call his brother and ask him to let me in this morning so I could bring him breakfast. To my surprise he actually didn't kick me out. Then he kissed me. What happened Friday was that I got drunk and I lost track of time. By the time I got to call him It was already too late. I know he put a lot of time into this and I felt terrible that morning but I couldn't deal with it so I got defensive when he confronted me about it. I apologized for this also. I am really happy that he is not mad at me anymore. I know he put a lot into this because of the NY thing I am going to take your advice and one day soon I am going to randomly surprise him. Chaz

We're having a great time here at the beach. It's still cold as hell but at least we are having fun. Selene finally found us we wouldn't have let her in but it was cruel to leave her out in the cold with her daughter so we let her in. Green and I love her daughter, she's so cute. Selene yelled at us because of the Dragon breath remarks we have made. I pointed out that neither of us lied. She thought it was rude of us to mention it. I wouldn't have if it wasn't for the fact that it kept me up all night. We're going back home tomorrow and Green is leaving me to plan some surprise that I am really worried about. Though his surprises do tend to be very good. What bothers me the most is that Selene is in on it. I hope she's not still mad at me. Green's been writing some stuff that seems very personal to him because he wont let me see it. It's this darkest day Mr. Black chapters. He even locked his laptop so I couldn't get in when he wasn't looking. I don't know I don't like this. He said he would let me see it when he was ready to but I know where the story is headed and I dont know why he would keep it from me. Oh well. There are people here that seem to like the cold. There was one guy walking around with a tank top. Green wanted to go outside and yell at him. We walked by the water and met with Green's father for lunch. He who works near here. He took us out to eat Japanese food. I must say that I hate sushi but I do love spring rolls. Green almost choked on wasabi sauce. His father and I laughed until he got mad and almost choked on water. No I didnt laugh this time. This time I actually felt bad. Chaz

I love the humor in this story. I think it's the best part because it keeps the story flowing. I read the whole six chapters in one sitdown because of the humor. I also read Desert Dropping which was also full of humor and I loved it. Great author period.

The one with the long hair looks like Green. Jonathan used him as an inspiration for that picture. Chaz

So I just read all of the six chapters in one sitting. These were great my boyfriend was right I am addicted now. Chaz