Krista

The comment read very story-telling, narratively to me. It flowed nicely. I loved it. You almost made me sad how you described the selling off of the unwanted land piece by piece. Maybe they needed to be more appreciative of the place built on the land they sold away. Phil took a different path than his father, who farmed. Living in an area where "lot sales" are becoming the sad truth of the landscape, I felt it. There will be five or six families buy those lots, they will claim it as their own and then before you know it they're backed up on your doorstep and there goes your peace, because no one wants to inherit land anymore, to work it. Just to sell it. I like these characters. I want people to believe that there are people walking around just like them, that's why I write the characters that I do.

I laughed loud enough that I had to explain how something could be so funny to my husband, who was only half paying me any attention because College Football 26 came out this month and he's been engrossed in that. I'm also annoyed that I hadn't noticed this new chapter until today. Don't be sneaky, now. So, the jock isn't dumb, just a bit academically disorganized. What happens after Skylar gives him the tools to bring him up well past the "dumb jock," level to a more even playing field. At least, with his unapologetically biased playing field. 😮 The guy also didn't blink with the whole sleeping with Lex thing, completely unbothered. Almost as if he didn't believe that for a second and knew Skylar's mother's interrogation was pointless. Or, he just doesn't care who Skylar may be accused of sleeping with. But, he's also horribly bothered with his girlfriend, to the point of a near end with her. Even on my worst cranky days, if I got that response back, I would have ended it there. We'll see if she has any dignity for herself, because even if she's being a bitchy controlling girlfriend, his response to that wasn't a good one. Just entirely too toxic and high school all around, those two. In it to be Homecoming and Prom royalty, with the bonus of sex, I'm guessing.

Not exactly Gay TV/Movies/or Books... But, "The Summer I Turned Pretty," season three's two debut episodes were a complete and total letdown for me. Mind you, most of season two annoyed me so much that I attempted to read the books. I got through the first half of one. So, I'm not all that invested in the source material, but if the source material has the scene in the second episode play out like it did, then I find it a major fault with the writing. The writing took a step back in season two, but it seems worse in these first two episodes. I'd have to look and see if there was a change in writers or not. I know the author has a significant role in the adaptation, and has since tweaked a lot of it to be more... current. Yes, people can make mistakes. There were just too many excuses made for poor behavior, that should have carried a lot more weight than it has so far. If there is 'less' of that weight in the following episodes, I may DNF it and retain my title of picky to a fault.

I think the next piece of writing will move along the story a bit better. Know that I am soooo tempted to post it. I wonder if I can sneak it in without Wildthing catching me... might dangle a basket of fish and chips in front of him, a cold pint too just for good measure.

I'm glad you did, because I just noticed that I called poor Simon a Clam. lol. Yeah, I think seeing people be accepted, specifically for being like you is something people whole a lot of weight on, before they make up their minds about things. If all you're living on is unknowns, it makes the decisions far more daunting.

I was thinking, aww this comment is so cute. Then you threw a shor'nuff statement at me and it sent me.

The last thing we need to be thinking about is Jonny Lundst Jr. being the hero of this story. But... it is an interesting and very true statement. He came along, annoyed Joel, and became an unwanted distraction. I like Trace thinking all this is a miracle angle better, but you can't deny Jonny's unexpected role either.

Colt... sigh. Well he's Colt.

Krista may also be interested. My paranoid-author self is going to be rereading chapters 4, 5, and 6 really fast after some of these comments. And by 4, 5, and 6.. I mean 6, 7, and 8 since we split up some of the monster chapters and I'm too lazy to re-number them in my documents. I just called them 1, 2, 3A, 3B, 4A,4B. I think 5 stands alone, then 6A, and 6B. Why make life easier and create new documents, one may ask...

Sometimes self-preservation is the only way people know how to live. I've seen it.

Gosh, the only thing I can say is... we'll see, won't we? lol. 😮 Just know, I say this with a twitch and a wondering if I'm going to survive some of these comments knowing full well if I open my mouth too much I'm going to say something that's going to spoil the hell out of something.

Damn, this makes my day... but also, the pressure. This story is roughly over 250k words long, for better or worse. Already written, so you don't have to wait, *hopefully* months between chapters and make the story span multiple years before you get the conclusion. *whistles*

Damn... what a missed opportunity that was... No genetic for familial connections between them though. Shocking, I know. 😮

I'd have to reread a bit, but yeah, I don't think I ever had Lisa or Phil use anything religious against him. Just prejudices, I think the most I went into is Joel overhearing things he didn't like, and knew he needed to be cautious and careful, but not exactly what it was. I mean, people can have physical aversions to homosexuality, because of the sexual act, etc. They may have had a bad experience dealing with someone who happened to be homosexual. It could be good ol' generational hate that she learned from a parent that 'may' loosely be based on religion, but she herself isn't religious, but retained that mindset. That's why I always say that hate is an individual choice people make. They can show strength and break the chains if they wanted. Lisa also doesn't speak to her siblings either. Maybe Lisa is just full of hate and if you give her enough time, she can run through everyone she knows and realize something about them she can't accept. There are people walking this earth that are like that... You are also correct about the span of time so far. Joel is not yet 48 hours into being outed and kicked out of his house. He doesn't have his phone. I don't think many people would even catch on that anything is amiss yet, despite small towns and all that. It is also the summer, so at least his gossip may be slowed down a little, at least until school starts.

Yes... for a lot of different reasons, unfortunately.

At least for now, she's behind him.

Yeah, Trace caught him in 'that' moment. People can come back to life, but sometimes they need to be caught right before, shown a different path and be helped along until they can walk it by themselves a bit better. It is sad, because for everyone who does, there are those that don't. He has shown some resilience, but I don't know if he would have had the chance to show himself that or not, not in the writing of Chapter one anyhow. I think people are too fast to end relationships, even with family now. Too willing to give up and be escapists instead of remembering and trying to stay, if there's something worth staying for, and it isn't too toxic of an environment for them. Joel couldn't stay after that, even if Lisa said all those things and let him stay, I wouldn't have written him as someone who stayed. If Lisa has a change a heart, she can find him. But yes, it still happens and not just with sexuality/coming out, but political differences, religious differences, disciplinary differences, etc. Go ahead and fantasize about Grady "Roy" with-Nice-Brown-Eyes Mason(Maison, because I've already caught myself oops changing his last name's spelling), so if I miss any, woops. It will be another Connor/Conner moment for me, for sure.

Yeah! Maybe?

Hmm. More than Cindy? 😮 Not to be off-topic, but (Do not read the spoiler if you've not read The Best Year...) I think the writing picks up a bit from this point on. There are some comments popping up that has me thinking I need to do some rewriting as well. They've been interesting. At least I have time to read and mull things over a bit.

Yeah, that last bit was a bit of new writing, because as I read this chapter (it was one of the 25k chapters that I split up), I saw that splitting it there, kind of left Joel's thoughts a bit... out there. I needed to bring them back to a more rounded out and central place. I liked the closing paragraphs. Joel is definitely guarded, maybe he won't be so guarded that he misses out. I'm glad you think Trace is still a strong role model.

Maybe. 😮 Or... maybe not. 😮 lol. At least Trace is trying to meet him more than halfway, definitely trying to wake him up with the jokes and promise of food and a roof.

Simon is the clam to Charlie's excited, flirty, outgoing nature. The rock that grounds the relationship and centers Charlie a bit. I didn't get into the dynamics of the lovers the "swim team" had, it was getting a bit clogged in the character department for me. If I developed Shaye-with-an-e because I totally didn't notice that I named two girls Shay until I remembered that Draeden had a girlfriend and that girlfriend had a name. At least Simon doesn't have to share his name with anyone else. He could have easily been a Gavin, btw, because apparently I can't go one story without a Gavin.

I can tell by the comments that this is the chapter that everyone was a bit miffed with me about, as it was a bit of a "nothing," chapter. I had to sit and reanalyze the story going forward, as I was worried sick that I was about to ruin these guys after all the building I put in all the chapters before this one. It was me seeing something different than what I think I wanted the writing to be.