kbois

Wayne, the worst thing someone can do is not listen to what their body is trying to tell them. I think most people are guilty of that. I know I certainly am. I'm glad you finally realized something was really wrong and got help. Kevin probably hit the nail on the head! 🤣 So....enjoy the cake. You deserve it!

Well, we're back home and all unpacked, laundry is going and I realized exactly how overboard I went at the distillery when I was putting it all away and it nearly didn't fit in the cupboard. It's a bit embarrassing to realize I bought: 2 bottles of Apple Pie Moonshine, 1 bottle of Orange Cream Moonshine, 1 bottle of Limoncello, 1 bottle of Florida Straight Bourbon, 1 bottle of Port Finished Bourbon, 1 bottle of Pineapple Rum, 1bottle of Orange Spiced Rum, 1 bottle of Gin. Plus, the non-alcoholic mixers....Ancient City Spice (2 of them) If anyone every makes it to St. Augustine I highly recommend the Airbnb we stayed at. It can be found if you search 'St. Augustine Intercoastal Private Waterfront Loft'. The hosts are Jeremy and Rena. We never saw them, just their cat and dog. We already want to go back and are thinking about going in Jan for hubby's b-day. We'll see how the crazy world turns for the next couple months. I hop the rest of the week goes well for everyone. I really don't want to go back to work tomorrow *whine*. 😭

Just checking in....the ghosts didn't get us!🤣👀

Well it's Monday evening and I'm sitting here on the balcony of our airbnb watching the dolphins 🐬 hunt for their dinner. There's about a half dozen of them, but it's kinda hard to tell. They don't exactly pop their heads out of the water and introduce themselves. 😄There’s a beautiful breeze coming off the Atlantic and I'm letting the wind dry my hair. It's actually a bit cool, which is nice coz it was really warm today. St. Augustine is a cool city. For those that don't know, it's the oldest continually inhabited city in the US. Lots of history for those who are buffs and plenty of shops and restaurants for those who aren't. For those interested there are also two distilleries and a winery, all are easily accessible via the trolley. I left behind a good chunk of change at each one, but hey, I don't need to buy whiskey, rum, gin or moonshine for at least a year. Oh yeah, bourbon maple syrup too! We had brunch at the St. Augustine Distillery and I had the BEST French Toast I have ever had the pleasure of introducing my taste buds to! I have no idea how anyone could've gone to Disney over the summer. It's been in the low 80s here, but wearing a mask outdoors is Hell. So much worse than indoors. Masks are no longer mandatory in this county,, but most stores still have a requirement posted. We wore ours whenever we were near other people. The trolley is open air and they have plexiglass between all the rows. My knees are toast. My feet hate me, but my brain has reset and I'm in a good place. It's amazing what a little R&R can do for one's soul. We are off to a ghost tour later on so if you never hear from me again you'll know that it twas a ghost that did me in! I hope everyone has a good week. @rickproehl I hope you get some relief with your dental issues soon.

Nice work tim. I really like how meaningful your way with words is.

They've definitely taken a step in the right direction. They still have a long way to go and they both have a lot more soul searching too. Their differences are absolutely fundamental and that will never change. As to where it will lead and how they get there? 🤐 Thanks for commenting Bard!

I made it. The last 5 minutes was rough. Now it's time to kick back, maybe go do early voting if hubby gets home soon. All that's on tonite's agenda is giving my son a ride to his youth group and putting groceries away when they get here. Tomorrow... pack a bag and drive four hours over to the Atlantic side of the state. We have a 2.5 hour sunset cruise booked. Social distancing and masks of course. I found out a local jazz band will be playing as well. 🙂 The rest of the weekend is all play it by ear. I haven't done touristy things in a while so it'll be fun. We have an airbnb reserved on the river facing east, so I guess watching a few sunrises are on the schedule too (with a big tumbler if coffee of course). We don't have to be back home until Tuesday. Younger son and I had a good talk and he seems to be more upbeat and his older brother will check in with him this weekend too. So, thankfully I feel ok leaving for the weekend. Hope everyone has a good weekend too!

I'm hanging on by a thread....decided to skip lunch and leave an hour early. My brain already departed for vacation a few days ago. C'mon 4 o'clock.....you can do it! Giddyap!

Things are getting better. Today I did a little adulting in the form of getting my oil changed in my car on my lunch hour. Then I got in touch with my inner child and ate a Tootsie Pop, which I can't even remember when the last time was that I had one. It definitely took more than three licks to get to the center. @mollyhousemouse I hope your day gets better.

You're welcome. And well done!

He loves music and I'm proud that he taught himself guitar. However... He did NOT get any musical talent from me! I might be able to string a few words together, but I'm special ed when it comes to anything music related. Thanks for the shoulder and the encouragement.

Thank you rick.

He might drive me crazy, but I'm really proud of this kid and what he can do with music. This is a cover song he did, guitar and vocals.

Thank you Kitt....and @Reader1810. Just being here is enough.

Thank you Mike. I have to admit that reading your post got me a little teary, but in a good way. It's comforting to have the support of everyone here. I don't think 'normal' will ever really apply again. Like tim said...the therapy, the meds, depression and anxiety is his life. It's true for my son too. We had a decent talk in the car when I brought him to his youth group thing. It's a start. I'm glad that we've only had one trip to the behavioral hospital and we were lucky that he didn't have to stay. I have told him in the past that I will not hesitate to Baker Act him if he becomes suicidal again. I hope I never have to go there. But you are soooooo right, it's worth the sacrifice we make. I think Moms have it harder than Dads. We carry a life inside us and endure a lot of pain bringing that life into this world. In the end the pain is worth it a thousand times over. I love my son, but I often don't like his behavior. He is the child that will always need me more than his brother. The sweet, little curly-haired tow headed little boy who 'discovered' a monster family under the chairs at his brother's karate class and made me 'wrap them up' and put them in my purse to take home is still in there somewhere. I have to believe that. Thank you again. The support that this group gives is incredible. ❤ (P.S. those "monsters" came with us everywhere for years.)

He's said that he would go. There are days when adulting is really hard and this is one of them.

Thanks for your thoughts tim. There's nothing to be sorry for. I just talked with his therapist and there's good and bad news. Bad news is that because he is now 18 he can't be reenrolled in services thru CPS (child protective service) Good news is that she's going to send me info on services he may be eligible for. Because of the whole deal with not having insurance, we now have to figure out what he will qualify for now that he's 18. Hopefully we can get him enrolled in Medicaid. It will fall completely on my shoulders as usual to figure it all out. He doesn't like to read, but he has his music as his outlet. He left last night as I was getting home. He said he was going to a job with a friend laying cable at a construction site. He was still gone this morning. I guess I'll get more info when I get home. I guess I'm tired, stressed, and just plain worried. I'm grateful for this forum as an outlet. Thanks again tim.

I would love for that to be a possibility. Unfortunately my son has pretty much hated school since kindergarten. Well, maybe 1st grade. Right before Covid he was behind in two of his four classes. The only positive thing about the shut down was his teachers basically passing everyone as long as they showed up online, which he managed to do. I'd be OK with the military, but he'd need to lose about 50-60 lbs and get into at least semi decent shape first. He was working out at home for a while and then lost interest. Like I mentioned earlier...I need a brick wall to bang my head against.

I highly doubt it. I think it's the consequence of being cooped up in the house pretty much since March. He's always been lazy? Lackadaisical? Something like that when it comes to helping out. I've just gotten to the end of my rope (husband too). We both work full time, I have my mom every weekend and it's been stressful not being able to go out anywhere. He runs hot and cold. He keeps telling us he's going to look for jobs, but when we try to ask, or offer suggestions he gets upset, takes things the wrong way and then we're arguing. Personally I think he doesn't trust us because we didn't protect him from the a-hole who abused him. I can't blame him for that. I'm still trying to come to terms with it. Gah, sometimes things just suck. Tomorrow is a new day, and I'm going to try to have a new attitude. It's the best I can do. Thanks for asking rick.

She's calling me on my lunch hour tomorrow. I hope she can help. I'm no longer looking forward to going away this weekend if he's still angry with us. He doesn't always make the best decisions and I don't want to worry thr whole time we're gone. Thanks for the encouragement.

Not a great day. I'm just in a funky mood. Waiting for my son's therapist to call. The whole incident just got to me.

Apparently getting angry was NOT the right thing to do. I need a brick wall to bang my head against. Is it wrong to expect an 18 yr old to clean up after himself? Having a child who is dealing with depression and anxiety is so hard sometimes. Theoretically he should know that he needs to clean up. Realistically he's incapable and I never know if it's truly his depression or just plain laziness. He is a master manipulator and I just can't risk the consequences of guessing. I have a call in to his therapist. He officially is done, but I think he needs to go back. Hopefully he'll agree. I just get so frustrated.

I love those results! I have a feeling this is going to be a long week. I have a 4 day weekend coming up with plans for a quick getaway for our anniversary. I need it to be Friday!!!🤪🤪

You too tim and Mike.

Breakfast done Mom is back at my brother's Hubby did laundry yesterday Need more coffee Could probably sweep the floors...maybe So far, so good!