Talo Segura

The ending was fine, I would have liked more at the beginning. Who was the person being resuscitated?

It really is about things unsaid, as @Geron Kees touched upon, kind of ephemeral conversations where something is talked around, which in this case was the feelings Brian had for Mick. Those feelings were echoed by the relationship between Tom and Mary, but Mick, gave the impression that he was not gay and so it would be unrequited love. They were happy, yet sad, Mick was wrapped up in himself and Brian was there, doting. There was actually an awful lot in a short chapter.

I want to say thank you for such a fantastic welcome, a special thanks to @Marty for taking time to read and comment. I really am overwhelmed after having either been ignored or gotten negative comments (I don't mind that not everyone likes what I write and I know it's far from perfect, but if you get told to go away and come back when you've learnt how to write, that's very discouraging) that here on this site you have all welcomed me with open arms. What more could anyone want, thank you, all of you.

Hello fellow members and aficionados of gay fiction, I am a new author (would be writer perhaps, as I'm not published and don't have much of a following) who joined the site to post my own effort at a story (and get some comments/feedback). I am also a reader and have read a lot on this site and lots of other sites. I probably read more than I write, but I do like writing. I have one difficulty (handicap perhaps, vis a vis being a member) which is I do not get online and onto this site very frequently, but when I am here I do my best to be apart of it and reply to people (I can always be contacted by email). Best, Tal. talo.segura.x@gmail.com

I am nine chapters in and thought it time to mention that this story is UNIQUE. Tell me if you've ever read a book from a baby's point of view, from the womb to birth and his early years. It is wonderfully described, whilst remaining a fictional story which includes reincarnation and telepathy. Somehow it keeps you gripped, maybe because, in part, it actually reminds you of everything you have forgotten about your very earliest view on the world.

Yes, that works 😁 Still think the Green WOW looks like a crazy bird and the blue SAD like a blue nose 🤣🤣

Three chapters in and I've liked them all, that is the story, but you need to correct the writing, read through it. You've got autocorrect putting in wrong words and I have to re-write it in my head as I'm reading. The story is great, really good!

Okay thanks, but the hovering over doesn't work on a phone.

I understand the Thumbs up is a LIKE, the Heart is a LOVED IT, the Yellow laughing face is FUNNY, but what is the Green bird and the Blue nose, and the Black face looks like HATED IT, why would you want to hate a chapter? Explanation?

I'm not always on to add reactions, but I've liked every chapter and this has to be probably one of the best stories on this site at the moment. There is a lot to comment on, and I'm way behind, but let's try: Kyle's mum is a weird character, she has a mother's insight and suspects her son might be gay, which is why she kind of approves of Greg as a role model. Whether Kyle is or is not gay hardly matters, he does pull Greg's strings when it comes to the abuse Greg suffered as a teen. Another weird mother is Nates mum, Greg's surrogate mother, also intuitive and loves to call people out, but the weird bit is she was married to the fiend and none of her intuitive nature saw what her own husband was up to. Anyhow great writing, great story (I also like your other story, it's different) this one has all the elements readers love.

You are right about not getting any comments here. I am new and posted a couple of chapters. On the second posting I asked readers to follow and comment. I got a LIKE and two followers, I got no comments. The numbers show a few hundred readers, but nobody said, nice story, liked it, nothing. I found another site, Nifty, and posted a story there, immediately I got emails from readers. What a huge difference! I stopped posting here, just look in from time to time to see if anything's happening, but nothing is. I can't really see myself posting chapters into a void. I agree with you, that if like 200 or 300 people read a chapter, then a few comments to the guy who wrote it, isn't too much to expect. If the readers out there can't be bothered to just say, liked it, I can't be bothered to post it.

I wanted to read a new author's story (apart from my own 🤣) and your opening chapter was good, full of mystery, I see a real tale developing.