Dan South
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Everything posted by Dan South
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Chapter 6 - My Girlfriend
Dan South commented on Arch Hunter's story chapter in Chapter 6 - My Girlfriend
I still can’t guess where this is going to land. Good job! -
Kevin’s inner monologue has been making me chuckle but this chapter I laughed out loud: “…it's also a weiner. He pees through it.”
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Chapter 4 - Anything for Love
Dan South commented on Arch Hunter's story chapter in Chapter 4 - Anything for Love
Seems Kevin is about to see Tory’s magic wand… -
Chapter 2 - Trout Fishing in Europe
Dan South commented on Arch Hunter's story chapter in Chapter 2 - Trout Fishing in Europe
No clue where this going yet and that alone will keep me reading! -
There is always someone greater than us and there is always someone lesser. Damien, the Shy Boy, believes himself to be lesser. That all changes when he is befriended by someone he considers greater. Befriended might be too lesser of a word. A repeat trip to a summer camp he dreads ends up being the best thing he couldn’t have imagined. Turn to Chapter One and meet Damien. It’s a grand adventure and an Author whose voice I’m sure you’ll love. Trust me …
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Young love. Beautiful!
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This is the only chapter that sounded Polish, lol. In your introduction you mentioned people told you there was awkward sentence structure and such. Likely the Americans’ comments. To me, this is where your voice comes through. Less measured, more natural. Beautiful. Your writing today is less like this but this is … charming. I have a dear friend who is Polish and Ukrainian, lives in Poland, and this was like reading his words. Beautiful! I’m hesitant to comment on teen sex but this, all of it, has been sensual. An awakening for these boys. And (semi) autobiographical? Phew. You were so brave to share this. Thank you! And… robić loda
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Every story posted here is a gift. I say too much, comment too often. I’m aware of that but lack the impulse control to not do so. I suppose I’m the other half of the fun…
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It’s either for Wainright or a Kim Possible reference. What do I think? Powerful prose. This chapter totally put the pedal to the metal. Clearly you hit your stride here @Arch Hunter. Really like Mr. Hudson, a lot. I am beyond impressed that you’re a non-native speaker. This is great! Just great.
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The dawning of self-awareness. Delightful.
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The extremely honest disclosure by Rufus that his father is in prison worries me. Tyler seems to lack the maturity to keep that information to himself. I hope to be wrong. I seriously suspect I’m not. A lot to unpack in this fantastic chapter!
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Seems the comment section has rather high expectations of a teenage boy. As a former teenage boy I have extremely low expectations for good behavior. Tyler is thinking with the wrong head. No cruelty but falling short on kindness…so far.
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Eric Carmen! Funny the things that capture our attention. That is indeed his song and that one line brought a big smile to my face. Love that the fifteen year olds consider it a put down to call the others twelve year olds. Happy to have discovered this story while I was clicking around looking for something new to read. I’m hooked.
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Gotta learn the Kentucky rules. Kentucky has rules? #respect
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Didn’t want to mention Creek Fried Potatoes … Hoda would love them
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How is it that Elaine didn’t make a frozen dessert? Love the Loelife shoutout.
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Chapter 2 Transcendental Taxi
Dan South commented on astone2292's story chapter in Chapter 2 Transcendental Taxi
Such a sweet short visit with these four guys. The Inkwell touch was great but leaves me wanting more Lex and more of kbois words. Nicely done Mr. Stone. You’re driving me to your co-author 😉 -
I have to rethink my adjectives for Wren. Trade deadly for … delicious. Trade gore for godlike. Trade beast for … bottom. Wren, the Monster of Aine! A lover? Lovely! “He was so adorable it physically hurt me. I could just eat him.“ Yeah. That’s expected. The rest of this wasn’t! No clue how I missed this sidetrack until today. Neatly knitted into the story I know and love. And to think the Monster part is questionable given more recent events. I needed a @Demiurge fix and this was quite the shot. Loved hearing (from) Eon. But there are wars to fight …
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Chapter 23: Alpha Arriving
Dan South commented on astone2292's story chapter in Chapter 23: Alpha Arriving
So Vincent’s wolf sounds like Gobbledok to you? Happy I wasn’t the only one hearing voices 😂 -
So, Eon is an attention whore? That certainly works in Lyme’s favor. Pleased to see the young character getting so much development. Anika is not worth much trouble, that’s well established. Kalian’s bleeding heart will likely go too far to save that bitch. Meep is getting a little sister ❤️ Wren aka Cherub LMAO I hadn’t intended to catch up @Demiurge but couldn’t stop myself. Now I sit here quietly and wait. One final question: how long? ❤️
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People are Friends Not Food
Dan South commented on Demiurge's story chapter in People are Friends Not Food
What have they done to the Monster of Aine? Blonde curls and burgundy eyes? He seems sufficiently hostile but does that work in a cute package? I knew Lyme would be in peril but perhaps he won’t be eaten? More questions than answers <sigh> -
If it is Wren returning then Lyme is gonna get eaten.
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Wren’s death has left a void in violent conflict that Talon is well suited to fill. I’ve missed his rage. Really enjoying Talon’s POV.
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Looks like that string snapped! Buh-bye Sumerian. Next!
