In a way, I'm speechless. This was not my world. I would have died had I "conformed." Each experience I "endured" in gay bars over the years were different. Many of them were fun (a good sense of humor helped). I'm not Mr. Personality, and I'm certainly not Mr. Studly or Mr. Chic or Mr. Gorgeous. But I had more than my share of dances with great guys, more than my share of dalliances with nice guys, and more than my share of, well ... fill in the blank. There were some disappointments, but those were easy to get past. Tears? Of course ... I balled my eyes out in more than one trans-Atlantic phone call. But, well, maybe I was just lucky. And maybe it says something that I didn't "get lucky" ultimately in a bar.