Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
Gemini - 10. A Private Exposure
Josh
Soft snoring… Why is there someone snoring in my room? And whatever I am lying on, it is definitely not my own comfortable bed. It is way too hard for that.
I opened my eyes and it took me a second to realize that I was still at Jacob’s place. A glance over to the nightstand told me it was a little past 5am. I usually didn’t wake up this early, but then again, I usually didn’t go to bed as early as I had last night. I felt a yawn coming, and made to stretch myself.
The only sound that came out of my mouth was a suppressed groan. Even the slightest movement made my arms and torso ache. The afternoon on the farm came back to my mind and then that I would have to go there this afternoon again. I groaned once more. Damn it! Why did I say I wanted to do that? I regretted it for a moment, but then I thought better of it. This muscle ache was still much more bearable than a single day with my parents or at my school.
I contemplated trying to get some more sleep, but I didn’t feel too tired, so I sat up and carefully left the bed, trying to avoid any more pain than necessary. Better to start early, before the others got up. Jacob had said that he usually got ready together with Ian and Conrad, but I didn’t feel comfortable with the idea of taking a shower while they were brushing their teeth in the same room. I grabbed Jacob’s towel from a chair nearby and a fresh change of clothes from the cupboard, and headed to the bathroom.
It took me a few moments to figure out the right temperature. I finally got it just right and stepped into the shower. The hot water was like balsam on my aching muscles. I relaxed and just let it flow over my body. After a few minutes, I realized that hot water costs its money and I couldn’t shower for too long. I didn’t want to be a burden on Jacob’s parents and I was already behaving differently enough from Jacob. It was better not to risk anyone noticing me taking an endless shower.
I quickly washed and turned off the shower. It had only been short, but still, those few minutes of hot water had done wonders to my body. The pain had subsided and there was only a slight aching in my muscles when I toweled off and got dressed. With still damp hair, I went to the kitchen to pour myself a bowl of cereal and make a couple of sandwiches for school. I took my time eating because I still had almost two hours left before school started. About twenty minutes later, Jacob’s mom entered the kitchen.
“Oh, good morning Jacob. You’re up early. Didn’t you sleep well?” She asked me.
I smiled at her. “Nah, I slept okay. I just woke up early and couldn’t go back to sleep. No idea why.”
“Ah okay. That happens to me, too, sometimes,” she replied and began preparing breakfast. I hadn’t seen much of her the night before, so I gave her a lot of careful glances while she was frying eggs and then later while she was eating. She was a small, roundish woman with a happy smile that never seemed to leave her lips. I didn’t exactly know why, but I couldn’t help but like her.
The kitchen slowly filled until all six of us were crammed together at the small table. There was some conversation but everyone was still sleepy, so it was mostly limited to someone asking to pass them something. I kept quiet and tried to look tired, so nobody would start a conversation with me. Nobody seemed to notice anything out of the ordinary and I barely had to speak at all. When it was a quarter to 7am, I got up and put away my dishes.
After having placed everything in the sink, I turned to the door to leave the kitchen. In front of me, at the oven, was Jacob’s mom, frying the last remaining eggs. She was kind of in my way, not enough that I couldn’t get past her if I really wanted to, but enough that it seemed impolite to me to squeeze myself through between her and the fridge. I was unsure what to do, but before I could make a decision, she turned to me.
“Are you leaving early?” She asked me.
“Yeah, Ethan asked me to meet him before school,” I explained.
“Is he plotting something again?” She winked at me and her eyes twinkled.
I rolled my eyes and grinned back at her. “He didn’t say anything, but with him, you never know.” I actually felt at ease with Jacob’s mom. The answer had also not been far from the truth. I wanted to walk on, but before I could react, she pulled me into a hug.
I was completely unprepared, almost shocked. My mother never hugged me. She was so distanced, I couldn’t even remember the last time I had any contact with her, not even through fabric while brushing arms against one another when entering a car or sitting next to each other at the table. Our dinner table was large and we sat far apart enough that there was no chance of coincidental touches.
It took me a second or two to shake off the stiffness that had first spread over my whole body. I was unsure of how I had to react, but it seemed like this was something completely normal for Jacob’s family, so I laid my arms around her and hugged her back. I didn’t even really know her, but being so close to her somehow made me feel good. I hesitated for a moment, and then I let her hug me, like really hug me, and it felt like I was melting into her embrace.
I didn’t know how long it took, only that I didn’t want it to stop, and that I kept holding on to her. I felt warm, and safe, like nothing could hurt me anymore. I suddenly realized how out of character I was acting for Jacob and started to pull back. She held me for a moment longer, but now I felt awkward. Jacob was her son, not I, and she only hugged me that way because she thought I was him. I felt bad, somehow like I was intruding on their relationship, like we were breaking the trust she had in him.
“Have a good day”, she said to me, as she ruffled my hair and smiled.
I tried to smile back at her. “Thanks, you too.”
I looked back as I left the kitchen and saw Ian staring after me, a thoughtful expression on his face. I turned around and walked on, pushing all the thoughts I’d just had back. If I started to think about things now, I would only give more away. I would deal with it later. After having brushed my teeth, I grabbed Jacob’s backpack and left the apartment.
My muscles had been okay during breakfast, but walking down the stairs and pushing open the heavy main door of the building reminded me of last day’s work. It wasn’t unbearable but I would definitely feel it during the day. My arms and my back were the worst while my legs barely gave me any trouble.
I walked to the street corner Ethan and I had agreed on meeting at. He wasn’t there yet, but I had expected that, as I was too early. While I was waiting for him, my phone rang. I checked the caller ID and it was Jacob. Great! Finally an opportunity to bitch about my muscle ache. I grinned and accepted the call.
He offered to trade back places, so I wouldn’t have to go to the farm, but I didn’t even waste a second to think about it before I declined. I was living Jacob’s life now and some muscle ache wasn’t going to stop me from that. I wanted to really experience being him and if that included some pain; I could accept that. He was definitely doing the same for me. So far, being him had been great, and if it was up to me, this would go on for forever. There were some problems here and there, but compared to my usual life, they seemed small.
Then Jacob started talking about Philip and how he had acted differently. I was really surprised, and for a second, I was even pissed that he interfered with my life in that way. If he was all friendly, Philip surely would notice a change and maybe that would make it even harder to get him to leave me alone. Then I remembered the hug between me and his mom. Some things just happened and we had to deal with them. I hadn’t handled everything perfectly either.
Maybe he was even right and I was completely misreading Philip? I doubted that, at least as long as I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes. Still, it couldn’t hurt to give it a chance. Whatever got Philip to leave me alone was fair game. We were just done talking about that when Ethan arrived.
“Anyway, gotta go, have a good day and don’t overdo it on the farm,” Jacob told me.
“Yup, and you, too,” I replied. Before I hung up I added softly: “ Be careful at school.”
“Hey Ethan”, I greeted him, as I put my phone away. We bumped fists and turned to walk the short distance to the school gates. I grinned at him. “Ready for another day at school with me?”
He laughed. “Definitely! How are you doing? Survived the day at the farm? Hurting much?”
“It’s alright, not too bad,” I told him, not wanting to look weak.
“Great,” he replied. “The coach is probably gonna give us choices on what we want to do. I wanna run with you. Just like Jacob, you’re probably good at that, and that way we can hopefully talk without anyone listening in.”
I groaned. “PE? Seriously?” Just then, I realized that I hadn’t even looked properly at the schedule for Tuesday. Jacob had Health on Mondays and Fridays, and PE for the rest of the week, I recalled. The whole plan had been set up for one day of school, Monday, and after that things had developed too fast to really think everything through. It was too late to do anything about it, though. I would have to deal with whatever was thrown at me that we hadn’t considered.
“Well, I think I can handle it,” I added. “I am in a pretty good condition from swimming and I used to do cross-country. The muscle ache is mostly in my arms, so I should survive.”
“Good, I was a bit worried that the day on the farm had completely worn you out,” Ethan commented grinning.
“Well, let’s see how things are tomorrow. I’m going there again today,” I said, and made a face.
“You’re crazy,” he shook his head. “Why are you doing that? It’s not like you have to. Jacob would trade back any time if you asked him. He is used to it so it wouldn’t be a problem for him. I don’t want to be you tomorrow.”
“I don’t know,” I replied. “Let’s talk about it later, we’re almost there.” I pointed ahead to the school gates.
He nodded, and shortly after we joined the stream of students who were entering the building. I spotted Sarah and greeted her with a hug. “It’s me. Josh, I mean,” I whispered in her ear.
“Damn, you fooled me again,” she whispered back. “I totally thought you wouldn’t do another day after having spent an afternoon on the farm.”
Before I could break the hug, I felt her fingers on my rips and she started to tickle me. I squirmed and tried to stop myself from laughing for a few seconds, but then I stepped forward and started to tickle her. She screeched and backed away from me, laughing.
When we walked on, she leaned over to me and whispered into my ear. “I knew it, you’re just as ticklish as him.”
I stuck out my tongue at her and shoved her playfully. Just then I spotted a face that looked familiar. He was a tall guy with short brown hair and a few freckles. I tried to remember why I knew him and what his name was. Ian had been hanging out with him the day before and we had spoken a few words at lunch. I suddenly remembered his name and took the risk.
“Hey Connor,” I greeted him.
“Hey J,” he replied with a smile and a nod before we walked on. Any doubt about whether the school day would be good had vanished. This was the first time I had greeted someone by myself and it was a great feeling, like I had just taken a huge step. I greeted several other students on the way to the homeroom and by the time I sat on my chair, next to Ethan, I couldn’t stop smiling.
♊
Sweat was running over my forehead and my shirt was sticking to my chest. A merciless sun was burning down on us, and there was not a single cloud in sight. Ethan and I ran side by side, fighting hard to finish the last mile before the time was up.
“If I find that idiot who was so keen on doing cross-country, I’m gonna kill him,” Ethan panted. Chuckling, I looked into his eyes and raised an eyebrow before I turned my eyes back to the ground before me.
“Yeah, whoever that was, tell me and I’ll help you to flay him alive,” I replied sarcastically.
At the beginning of the lesson, the coach gave us a free choice of several activities, just like Ethan had predicted in the morning. He enthusiastically signed us up for cross-country running. He really seemed keen on running with me and being able to talk without anyone around. I agreed right away, too excited about spending time together with him to actually think it through.
As soon as we had started running, I realized that I had no idea what to talk about when I was alone with him. I started to frantically think about what I could say and how I could prevent this from being totally awkward. After a few minutes, the crowd of students who had chosen to run, too, started to split up more and more.
However, by the time everyone was far enough away for us to talk without being overheard, we had other problems. It was far too hot to run and even though my muscle ache was mostly limited to my arms, I wasn’t exactly in the right condition for a long run. So instead of talking, we just focused on running, and that’s how we ended up totally sweaty and worn out with one mile to go.
“We should have taken a shortcut when it was still possible,” I panted. “This is insanity.”
“You know what?” Ethan commented. “I almost feel sorry for you. I can spend the afternoon relaxing and playing video games while you work on the farm.”
“I should volunteer you to help, too,” I grumbled.
“You wouldn’t dare doing that,” he laughed.
“Who knows?” I panted. “Let’s not talk, too much effort.”
“Aw, poor Josh being a wimp?” He teased me. I just rolled my eyes at him and focused on my breathing.
“Almost there,” I panted, as we were getting close. Ethan fell into a sprint and I joined in. I was really exhausted, but not wanting to fall behind, I did it anyway. By the time we reached the finish, I was ready to collapse. Leaning on Ethan, I waited for my breathing to calm down. Some assistant coach recorded our time and told us that the period was almost over, so we could go change.
Still panting, we headed to the changing room. Jacob’s locker was right next to Ethan’s at the end of the room. There were four other guys in that corner with us, but other than that it was pretty secluded thanks to a wall of lockers behind us. I took off my shirt and opened the door to Jacob’s locker. Ethan did the same and I glanced over at him as he pulled his shirt over his head.
After a short struggle, he got the shirt off, and I quickly knelt down to untie my shoes, so he wouldn’t notice that I had looked at him. When I came back up I saw the other four guys stripping and leaving. I followed them with my eyes until they disappeared, then I heard water running and suddenly a terrifying realization hit me. My eyes shot back to my locker. I saw a towel right in front of me. For a second I stopped breathing.
“What are you waiting for?” Ethan asked me, as he pulled his towel out of his backpack.
My heart was beating increasingly fast. “Jacob never said anything about showering after PE,” I hissed.
Ethan gave me a confused look. “Well, don’t you shower after PE?”
“I always had PE last period or before lunch,” I whispered, panic clearly audible in my voice. “We don’t have to shower, so I always go home right after PE to shower there.”
“Well, we have one more class left before lunch, so it’s probably better to take a shower,” he shrugged. “We’re totally sweaty and Jacob always showers, so you should, too, I guess.”
I looked at him with big eyes. “Damn, I hadn’t even thought of this. I don’t know if I can do it. I have never done it before, what if...” I trailed off.
“Oh,” he said, finally realizing that I was totally scared. “Look J, it’s no big deal, really. You just walk in, take a shower and then you walk back out. That’s it. Nothing to worry about.”
“Yeah, but what…” I started again, but he interrupted me. “Stop worrying. You’ll be fine,” he reassured me. “Look, here you’re Jacob. Don’t worry about anything, because he’s always been showering after PE. There is nothing you need to waste any thoughts on. You’re just doing what he’s doing and nobody will even think about it.”
“Do I have to?” I asked, desperately hoping he would just tell me not to do it.
“Actually, I think you should do it,” he said, and grinned at me. “Really, it’s not that bad. We’re running out of time, so don’t think much about it, just do it.”
I sighed. “You’re probably right, I’m being childish. It’s just… ah whatever,” I interrupted myself. I surely wasn’t going to tell him that I was afraid I’d pop a boner when I was in a group shower with over 20 naked, and some pretty hot guys my age.
I turned away from him and hooked my thumbs into the waistband of my boxers. It couldn’t be that difficult, could it? It was a totally normal thing for most people, so why was I making a big issue out of this? I hesitated for another second, but then I made a decision and pulled the boxers down. I had pushed my boundaries so often since I’d met Jacob, this was just another small step on my way to being a different person, to being Jacob’s twin.
Feeling very unprotected, I stepped out of my boxers and covered up with the towel before I turned back to Ethan. He was still standing there, watching me. I waited for him to move, to strip, and head to the showers, but he didn’t.
“What?” I asked him with a confused look.
“I just realized something when you pulled those boxers off,” he stated.
“And that is?” I asked nervously.
“Take off that towel for a second,” he told me.
“What? Why?” I asked shocked. Why would he want me to do that?
“Oh, c’mon, you will take it off anyway, as soon as we get to the shower, so don’t make a big deal out of it. I just realized that there is something that could give the whole secret away,” he shot back.
“And that is?” I asked slowly.
“Well do we even know if Jacob and you are both cut or uncut?” Or maybe Jacob is shaved, and you are not?” He grinned. “That could cause some unpleasant questions.”
“Well, just tell me then; is he?” I asked, probably a little too eager. I was sensing a great chance to avoid taking a shower. I could just tell him I was whatever Jacob wasn’t and then I couldn’t take the shower. It wasn’t like I wanted to go all sweaty to the next class, but I wasn’t thinking straight. The whole thing with showering naked had totally caught me off guard and I was still kind of scared about it.
“Oh no, you won’t,” Ethan scolded me, totally reading my thoughts. “No cheating allowed. I know what you’re planning. You signed up for being Jacob, now go through with it. This is as much a part of the deal as sleeping in his bed or eating his aunt’s awesome cooking.”
I wanted to argue, but he had a point and I couldn’t find any good reasons against his logic. When I hesitated for another few seconds, he gave me a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, there are only guys around here. We’ve all got the same equipment. Well, more or less at least. Now, drop the towel?” When he had finished speaking, he gave me the ‘puppy eyes’ look.
I looked back to him like a deer caught in the headlights and slowly nodded. I couldn’t think of any way to get out of this anymore. After taking a deep breath, I unwrapped the towel from my waist and held it in my hands, presenting my naked crotch to him. I could feel my head burn and I turned my eyes away, not daring to look at him while he scanned my body.
I could feel his eyes on me and started to count the tiles on the ground while I waited for him to say something. I don’t know how long it took. Five Seconds? Ten seconds? It felt like an eternity. Finally, I couldn’t take the tension any longer and looked up. He was grinning and gave me a wink. Was he enjoying this?
I opened my mouth but he was faster. “Looks good to me, let’s go.”
He turned around, pulled down his boxers, and grabbed his towel. Turning his head around, he gave me a wink before he strolled towards the showers. I stood there for a second longer, thinking about what he’d just said. ‘Looks good to me.’ Also, the time he had taken to stare at me… and then there was his grin. Was I just seeing things I wanted to see or was there more to this?
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Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
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