Blueblood 4: Dracula - 6. Confronting Inner Demons

I threw my hands out in frustration and this man…claiming to be Dracula raised a single eyebrow. “Mister Articulate strikes again.” I moaned. I noticed this…whoever he claimed he was, wasn’t bothered by it. The corner of his mouth turned us slightly as if it amused him.

The man that said he was Christian walked forward a little. “Now, why would you say that what I said was…bullshit?”

Christian folded his arms over his chest. “You didn’t even hesitate. You simply said yes.” He waved at him. “You’re not Dracula any more than I am!” Colin walked closer. “You are a vampire, I’ll grant you that. You readily admit that you are…the most infamous person that lived during that time, or any other times?”

“That doesn’t tell you anything.” The man said. “Why do you think I’m not Dracula?”

“I feel you’re not telling the truth,” Colin explained.

“Do you?” The man said smiling.

I felt a sudden chill. It was summer, we were underground so there was no breeze nor was it cold down here. It wasn’t just on my skin; this chill went down to my very core…my bones…my very soul? This feeling grew behind us. We turned around. Each of us, Colin, George, and Burke turned at the same time. This chill had reached each of us at the same instant. How do I say this? Behind us was a shadow. He was…at least by his shadow…between Colin’s size and mine, so about six feet.

“Enough.” The shadow said softly. It wasn’t loud, but it was powerful, deep and seemed to resonate. “Thank you, Cragen.”

You know me and my love of movies, all that was missing here was a thunderclap and flash of lightning; and don’t forget the creepy music. This room was lit by several gas lamps, but when this shadow moved closer and the light revealed what he looked like. This person was…he had the vampires eyes or rather a vampire's eye. He wasn’t ugly, but there was the scar down the left part of his face he’d gotten long ago by a sword that cut him from just above the left eyebrow and down parallel to his nose, the left eye had also been cut, but only slightly and now was clouded over in white, but still lacked the moisture. The most important part was his very presence. He was a warrior, a soldier. His body had been through battles and it showed. His hair was dark black, but while clean and cut, but in long curls that made him look sort of windblown.

“If you had said you were Dracula, I’d believe you,” I said.

This man gave the ghost of a smile as he moved closer. “But Cragen wasn’t lying when he said he was Dracula. He is.” This new man said. “I am the one they call Christian.”

Colin looked at me and then back to the real Christian. “Dracula isn’t just him, is it?”

Christian shook his head. “No. The man that wrote Dracula made a composite of several vampires. He combined several stories into one character, which you know Count Dracula is just made up.”

I nodded. “There are similarities with Dracula and Vlad Dracul. You have to admit. The idea that Dracul, in Romanian means devil, Gaelic meaning bad blood, that’s pretty coincidental.”

Christian gave his ghost of a smile again. “Why does it have to be coincidental? It could be on purpose.” He looked at George with his alert eye. “I sense…” he walked closer to George. “…you are the healer.”

“Alin told you?” George asked.

Christian gave again that ghost of a smile. “He told me about the red hair, but I could tell from observation, intellect is not hard to see. You learn through the centuries to read the subtle signs. For instance, a laborer has calloused hands, which are often dirty, even when they scrub them. After a while, there are indentions on the fingers and alertness or dullness in the eyes. You have what I see is the alertness and very clean hands. No callouses. A man is like a book, it’s a talent learned with time to read these signs.” He looked at Colin. “Which I sense you have learned, or are starting to learn. People don’t deceive you, do they?”

“Not often,” Colin replied.

Christian nodded. “You have a look also that says you’ve been alive a while.” He walked to John Burke. “You have been around longer than these three.” He came to me. “You, however still have the look of someone that life is still new for. You were made one of us recently…in the past few years.” He turned to Colin. “Why did you seek me out?”

“Our life has been changed because of this…” Colin waved at Christian, “…condition we find ourselves in. I lived a difficult time for a century. I was alone. I was different even before I became a vampire.”

Christian nodded. “Because you are drawn by the desire to humans that are male for companionship.”

“Yes.” Colin nodded. “That doesn’t shock you?”

Christian laughed lightly. “Men in places of power, usually claiming they speak for God, have problems with it. It is more prevalent than people think. I too have enjoyed the company of male companionship in the past. It is almost…common among men. They just don’t talk about it.” He looked again at Colin. “Why did you seek me?”

“Wouldn’t you like to be free of the bloodthirst? To go into the world when the sun is up? To be able to travel where you want or need to? To see you are not alone?” Colin asked.

“In order to find others that are vampires,” I added. “Having your backing on what we do, will add more validity to what we want to accomplish.”

Christian looked at me. “Why?”

“If you are, who I think you are,” I said. “You have more power to bring those like us to a new place in the world. We wouldn’t be restricted to darkness and shadows. We could take a place in the world again.”

“We should not be at all!” Christian said firmly. “Alin told me you have some information about our origins.”

Colin nodded. “We found in Egypt, some writings that we’ve pretty well translated. It tells of men that created the first vampires. These first vampires were sent into this world to weaken nations in preparation for conquest. We called them The Others or the Old Ones.” Colin pulled his tablet out and pulled once again the drawing that Wayne had done. “This is one. It bit a friend of mine and changed him into what we call a Wild Vampire. The Old Ones are incapable of speech. They mature very quickly but don’t die. They do not have the scrotum or anus as men do, they are incapable of reproducing except through venom they inject when they bite and can only live on blood. We think…no, we’re certain they are the beginnings of our kind now.”

“You wish to cleanse the world of these creatures,” Christian said with a nod. “You seek to get rid of this…evil.” He looked at me as I thought about Gizmo. “You’ve met one.”

I looked suddenly back at Christian. “I did.” I nodded. “I can no longer assign the label of evil or good to them.” I smiled as I thought of Gizmo. “I befriended one. I named him Gizmo. Other than his need for blood, which was really the only thing he wanted, I found…since he didn’t desire mine because I already was a vampire…trapped with me…I found he was almost like a child. I’m not sure he even knew about right and wrong. He was…innocent.”

Colin walked to Christian. “George came up with this serum. It attaches to this venom that changed our bodies. We became these creatures. We are vampires.”

“Yet through time, mankind has been diluting the venom and we changed it, keeping our humanity,” George added. “I’ve worked so hard to get us some sort of life back from which we were all robbed. I’m close. I think it can be stopped.”

“And create a much more dangerous man,” Christian said, but his tone was more grave. “You can’t reduce the life span, so we are still virtually immortal. A twisted human with this ability is much, much more dangerous than a mortal man.” He sighed. “Even now, among ourselves, there are conflicts. Here, in this part of the world, there are those that seek control and will do anything they have to get what they want. Power.” He turned away in thought. “The new technology you bring here will allow these men to push out more, they will seek this power and control. A man will die eventually. A vampire will not! A dictator comes to power every so often, but his lifetime is limited. A dictator or tyrant who will not die is much more dangerous.” He turned back to George. “I believe your true motives are to help people, but what you’re doing is giving these bad men the means to do it and do it longer!” Christian was now angry. “You take the hunger away from a vampire which restricts his movements and motivations. You give him the freedom to do…the unspeakable.” He shook his head. “No. Man struggles in the attempt to make things better; conflicts arise and it causes them to stress on the next generations how they should conduct themselves to be better. The need to change is now moot with this…serum! You are as guilty as those men that created the Old Ones.”

“Whoa.” I held my hands up. “That is a stretch!”

Christian shook his head. “He is continuing the work those men started by creating us!”

“So, why are you still here?” I asked. “If things are so dire, why not go outside when the sun rises and end it?”

Christian frowned. “Do you know what I’ll face after I do?” He asked. “I don’t! Is there a God? I don’t know. I know that if there is a God, I face judgment! My past deeds will not get me into Heaven. I stay here as long as I can to avoid that!”

“Wow,” Colin said. “You think what you did makes you evil?”

“I did what I had to!” Christian said. “Families were being torn apart, children used in ways to satisfy men’s desires for both sadistic and sexual gratification! My brother was used for that! They were slaves!”

I shook my head. “That sounds like you were doing it for the right reasons.”

Christian shook his head. “I found I was enjoying it!! I am evil!!”

“You’re not giving any God a chance to forgive you,” I said.

Christian turned to me. “I can’t ask for forgiveness! I don’t regret it! Nothing I did, do I regret. How can I ask for forgiveness for something I enjoyed?”

I frowned. “I get what the problems is; you can’t forgive yourself. That means you are…”

Christian spun on me which surprisingly, didn’t scare me. “Don’t say that name!!” He shouted. “I chose to be known as Christian, maybe it will reduce the punishment I deserve! But I can’t let it go!” He held his fists to his head. “I got pleasure hurting those people. That is evil.”

George shook his head and came closer to Christian. “Then why didn’t you stop Alin? Why did you want to see him getting that which you feel you don’t deserve?”

Christian looked at Alin. “Look at him.” He waved looking almost lovingly at Alin. “He is not guilty of anything. He was made what he is.” He looked at Colin. “Just like you weren’t guilty of anything to be what you are. I am!” He looked at George. “You monitor those that you give this medicine to. Do you give it to criminals?”

George shrugged. “I want to, if for no other reason than to stop them from feeding on people.”

“We have several vampires that are criminals,” Colin said. “They are no longer in control of anything. Their hunger is gone.”

“You say you’re evil,” I said. “I see a man that had to do horrible things and got used to it. Did you ever do it to an innocent?”

Christian looked at me. “Not all that I had killed or maimed were evil, I’m sure there were innocents.”

“I see a man that has a presence. I could feel you even before I saw you. That’s powerful.” I took Colin’s hand. “He is trying to get us together so we’re not isolated and alone anymore.” I waved at George. “He’s trying to rid us of this condition. Do you think he should stop? Give in and all of us go out in the sunlight and burn?”

Christian gave a nod. “It would end this condition.”

I shook my head. “I don’t think so. There are going to be those that won’t do that. The condition will still be there. There are still Old Ones out there. I met one and I’m sure there are still a few. If you don’t want the serum, fine. You have a powerful personality that could persuade people. We are trying to come up with regulations about giving the serum. You could help!”

“Which I don’t think there should be regulations,” George said. “Every vampire should be on it to prevent making others. We can lock them up. They can no longer cause harm.”

“It’s fear,” I said simply. “You’re afraid to die,” I said softly to Christian.

Christian nodded. “I am! I admit it. Not knowing what I’ll face, sure, I’m afraid to die. If you can convince me beyond the shadow of any doubt there is nothing. I would go in the sun, but I can’t take that risk.”

“No one can convince you of that,” I said. “If you take the serum and have freedom, you can concentrate on positive things you can do.”

“A single piece of rotten fruit will ruin fresh fruit,” Christian said. “I can’t undo the things of the past. Only with me, there is a lot of rotten fruit.”

I nodded. “You…have a big problem.”

Colin nodded. “You do, but you don’t see you have a talent and ability that most men don’t? You can size up a man easily. You have a…” Colin thought, “…charisma that will draw people to you. If you agree to add your voice to what we’re trying to do…many people out there suffering as vampires will get help.”

“This can’t all be about you,” I said. “You did what you did for others. You helped them deal with a bad group of people. You didn’t do it because you like making people suffer. You began to like to make them suffer…after you were forced to do it. Your mind just…slipped into a comfortable place to keep going. You had to, or go insane!”

“I am insane!” Christian said loud.

I shook my head. “I don’t think so. The fact that you said that, tells me you’re not. An insane person doesn’t know he’s insane. You think you are.”

Colin nodded. “We’re not your judges. You’re doing a fine job all by yourself doing that. If you don’t want the serum, that’s fine. Don’t say George is doing something he shouldn’t. He’s trying to get a life back when the one he had was ripped away by this venom.”

“There are bad men.” I nodded. “They don’t wrestle with their conscience as you do,” I said. “I sense a good man in you. You regret. Those men don’t. You’re not a bad man.” I was now next to Christian and I carefully reached out and touched him. “Please. I would love to help you, as well.”

“How?” Christian asked.

“I’ll listen,” I said. “I have a man I gladly call Dad now. He has things in his past he regrets. He thinks what happened in his past is also unforgivable and he can’t forgive himself. When he needs to, I listen. No judgment, just listen. I can do that with you.”

“How will that help?” Christian asked.

I smiled. “Sometimes, just getting it out helps; it will be difficult for you. It will be difficult to hear I have no doubt, but I’m willing to try. Maybe, with time, you can get to a point you can forgive yourself and ask God to forgive you. I promise to try.”

“There’s so much,” Christian said in a moan.

I nodded. “Then we need to get started.”

Christian sighed and he wiped his face of tears he could not shed but wanted to. “Where do I start?”

I smiled. “You just did. You have agreed to think about it. That was a start.” I looked him in his one good eye. “I’ve met and befriended some others; one that no one thought I should. Gizmo was a killer…far more than you were, it was what he was made for, but I loved him. I’m willing to take that chance with you.” For a moment, in that one eye…I swear I saw…something; a flash of something more…human. I carefully put my arms around Christian who was not sure if he should respond, but slowly, I felt his arms come around me.

I heard what he’d said before about the other vampires being Count Dracula, but my mind now was telling me, I was hugging and being hugged by the very REAL Dracula!!!