Songs of the Heart - 4. Chapter 4 - Sore Nuts, A giant, and A yellow bug... Oh My!

Who would've thought that a 5’5 guy could pack such a wallop? After the knee/punch combo all I could do was moan and hold my baby makers.I could hear the guys and some dude whom I assume was a friend of Nessay’s screaming his name. I know I deserved that punch, but jeez, did he have for go for low blow, too?

“Hey guys just ignore me, I am fine! Don’t think I will be having babies anytime soon!”

That seemed to get people's attention and I was helped up and into a chair with lots of ice packs. Out of the corner of my eye I saw this massive man come over, his hands slipped under my arms and he hoisted me to my feet with ease. I really don’t know if I have the words to describe this guy. Think the mountain from GoT, only ten times more handsome. I was trying to figure out whether he was here to throw me out or deliver more pain that I deserved.

Over the next several hours I got interrogated by Ty and the giant whose name I learned is Odin. I told them about how I made Nessay’s life hell, how I regretted it all, that I wasn't an angel but, I am not the same person I was. Finally after my story we took a look at my nose and thankfully, just painful, not broken. Lucky for me, Odin is a pediatrician, so I could feel confident in his diagnosis.

Caring and sweet, strong and stubborn, more of a homebody, well as much as an owner of the only bar in town could be one. Nessay has been single for several years, last boyfriend cheating on him. I wonder what people would think of me if they knew how much I wanted to wring that bastard’s neck. How dare he hurt Nessay? I also felt the dagger of my own guilt dig a little deeper into my own gut.

Couple hours later and after a couple beers, the boys and I excused ourselves to head back to the hotel. The look Ty gave me sure made the room get a little cooler. I think I am going to have to work a little bit harder than I thought to get back into Nessay's good graces. Luckily it seemed like Odin was not going to interfere, that may have been one huge road block. I also noticed that Jared was watching Ty a little closer than he normally would other people he just met. Knowing his fondness for his partners to be smaller and slim, I eyed the couple up. Jared stood almost 6'3 where Ty must have been 5' even, where Jared was like me built like a bodybuilder and packed with muscle, Ty was slim and his body built like a dancer or gymnast.

It was Micah's fist to my shoulder that knocked me out of my revere, and with a returned punch, we excuse ourselves, calling it a night. In the bus, the boys grilled me about the town. What was it like to live where you could literally walk everywhere you needed to go? What was it like to have one diner, one grocery store, no Wal-Mart? I just sat there and grinned as they acted like they have never seen a town this small before. On our way here I had broken down and explained the whole past and who I use to be to them. They razzed me to hell about it, and also gave me a tongue lashing I so deserved. Then they built me back up like brothers do, I am not sure what we would do without each other. And I don’t want to find out. The three of us over the last two years have become the only family we could rely on. I love these men, and when the fame has come and gone we will be there in our old age teasing and supporting each other for rest of our days.

Arriving at the hotel we made plans to meet up at the diner cross the street for breakfast. God I could almost taste the bacon, eggs, hash browns and Texas toast. I was also looking forward to talking to Becky, the waitress unlike any other waitress. She seemed to know just how to deliver some sage advice just when you needed it. I definitely needed some advice on how to get Nessay speaking and not kneeing.

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“Well if I live and breathe is that little Brady Jordan walking in my door! How have you been sugar? Long time no see baby boy.” It felt simply amazing to be home and with someone who was just like family. I rushed over and gave her a huge hug and spun the older lady around a couple times before leading the boys to my table. The final years in town I had picked and claimed the table in the corner that let me see the whole diner including the entrance. It let me see if my father was looking for me, giving me options if he did.

Over the next couple hours we laughed, talked some, and then laughed even harder. We put our heads together trying to figure out how I could get back into Nessay’s good graces. We developed a three prong idea to at least get him to point where I could apologize and see where that goes. After devouring our delicious food and another big hug we left to head out for practice. If nothing else I was going to give my hometown crowd a show they would never forget.

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So at this point, all the planning we did has gone out the window. It's been three days, no one has seen or heard from Nessay except one bartender. Calls, emails, flowers, texts, and even just showing up at his door had gone unanswered. His friends were both concerned and nervous. Especially Ty who seemed to keep wringing his hands together over and over, and at one point looked like he was ready to burst out in tears. We had decided to meet at the bar and talk out a strategy to get Nessay out of his house and back to the bar. I could also see Jared inching closer and closer to Ty, it was pretty funny watching my band-mate act all nervous and giddy.

“Okay guys it's time to get serious, why do both of you look like your puppy just got kicked?”

That broke the ice, and the tale they would tell me just about broke me. I as the reason Nessay never finished high school. I was the reason of their panic and concern, about what would Nessay do seeing me again. After he had stormed off they had gone to see his mom, she had filled them in. Two days after that pantsing incident in high school, Nessay Rodriguez decided to take a knife and slash at both wrists. If his mom had not come home early, Nessay would have been lost to us.

I was crushed, angry, hurt, frustrated, and most of all disappointed. There is no worse feeling than seeing disappointment in the eyes of your brothers. Though no one was more disgusted with me than me. I could feel myself slowly slide from the chair onto my knees. Tears and sobs wracking my body. What had I almost done? Why didn’t someone help him?

“I lost him! I don't deserve ever be forgiven. I should never have come back to this wretched little town.I should of stayed away, like I had over the last several years.

Slowly sank to the floor and curled into a ball. I had almost taken a life. I was and am a horrible person. How do I get past this? Maybe I should disappear. I am sure the band would survive without me.

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I awoke three hours later in Nessay’s office on the couch, I could hear the muffled voices of my band mates and Nessay’s friends talking. Slowly I got up and began to look around the office, stopping when I see an official looking letter from the bank. A quick glance and my heart dropped. Nessay was weeks if not days away [weeks, if not days, away] from losing the bar, and I couldn't imagine the pain that would've caused him. Taking picture with my phone of the letter, and shooting off quick text, simply stating “fix this,” before turning to the door and opening it.

“Guys I am going to his house, and I will not take no for an answer! We will talk and I will fix this if it’s the last thing I do. Now all of you focus on getting the festival set up. I will be back with a certain someone in no time!”

Ty started to object but I gave him a glare, this was between Nessay and me I started his problems and now I was going to do my best to fix them. Odin gave me a small smile before tossing me his keys, then leading still complaining Ty away I turned to my band mates. Quick nod to them both I jogged out the door and hit the unlock button. Searching around each of the big trucks in the lot I was starting to get frustrated, when I suddenly saw head lights flashing.

“You have gotta be shitting me?” There sat Odin’s car, a 1960, bright yellow Volkswagen Beetle. How does someone the size of a mountain fit into this tiny little car? Why would someone the size of a mountain drive this tiny car? This was definitely something to ask Odin about later.

After a quick drive, I pulled up to Nessay’s. Frist, I knocked on the door, then I pounded on the door, and finally, I backed up and charged and busted the door wide open. Stepping into his house my heart shattered, in one hand I saw a knife and on the opposite wrist, I saw drops of blood. I approached him and took the knife away, wrapped my arms around him and kissed him stupid. Talking would come next but, for now he needed to know exactly how I felt. I broke the kiss leaving us both panting and breathing hard, so I could cup his chin and look him in the eyes.

“I don't know what you're thinking Ness, but we need to talk!”

Then I kissed him again, fireworks went off and the world tilted. We still needed to talk, but for now I hoped this kiss would never end!