The Thousandth Regiment - 11. "O warm-spice mercy in a moving dress!"

Impressive, strong images in brutal contrasts. You translated them perfectly. It seems almost as if they were prisoners instead of soldiers -prisoners of a false believe a false idea of obedience, a false system. And in this mud, dust and blood, his humanity is stripped bare. Even though the contrast of the first two stanzas seem to have more volume, to my opinion the last two stanzas give also a deep impression, maybe a deeper one, because of the quieter dark sound, they generate in my ear at least. Your achievment to bring this effect from German into English is enormous. Hammer! 

Their lives are slowly being sucked from them. A bullet may be better.  This is beautiful work, but i am sorry in a way, he ever had to write them.

The civilian life likened to a seductive woman; the soldiers’ lives made into a prim, strait-laced and embroidered one - this is brilliant imagery and metaphorical poetry. So too is Hans’ appeal to the relative innocence of the men in the trenches, who, until recent time were boys in the bloom of their youth. Let me repeat my thanks to you for your work translating these poems. 

On 8/22/2019 at 11:51 AM, Lyssa said:

Impressive, strong images in brutal contrasts. You translated them perfectly. It seems almost as if they were prisoners instead of soldiers -prisoners of a false believe a false idea of obedience, a false system. And in this mud, dust and blood, his humanity is stripped bare. Even though the contrast of the first two stanzas seem to have more volume, to my opinion the last two stanzas give also a deep impression, maybe a deeper one, because of the quieter dark sound, they generate in my ear at least. Your achievement to bring this effect from German into English is enormous. Hammer! 

Thank you, Lyssa. You mention the contrast between the first two stanzas and the last two. Ehrenbaum-Degele was a master of the Sonnet form -- which each of these thirty-eight "Regiment" poems are -- and used the inherent power of the pivot point to great effect. At first, when I dug into Hans' non-war poems, I was fairly astounded to see him construct Sonnets as I do: challenging opening Quatrains falling to clear-cut passages after the pivot point. In some ways, he and I seem to be poetic brothers, so I am committed to doing my best for his work. 

Thank you, as always, for introducing me to him in the first place. Yay for our mutual friend Else!     

On 8/22/2019 at 7:44 PM, Mikiesboy said:

Their lives are slowly being sucked from them. A bullet may be better.  This is beautiful work, but i am sorry in a way, he ever had to write them.

Thank you, Tim. What you mention here is an element shown breathtakingly clear in later poems. I feel writing these poems helped Hans cope, and as we poets know, this can be a great lifeline in an otherwise bleak existence. 

Thank you for reading and commenting on these Regiment poems. I really do appreciate it

On 8/23/2019 at 4:47 AM, Parker Owens said:

The civilian life likened to a seductive woman; the soldiers’ lives made into a prim, strait-laced and embroidered one - this is brilliant imagery and metaphorical poetry. So too is Hans’ appeal to the relative innocence of the men in the trenches, who, until recent time were boys in the bloom of their youth. Let me repeat my thanks to you for your work translating these poems. 

Thank you, Parker. I like how you mention the "Barracks hooked in and embroidered tightly closed." I agree it's extraordinary poetry, the depth of which several serious papers could be written. And yes, the "chests filled with blood and roses" also concisely places the men in their time of life. I doubt there has ever been much difference between maturing teenage-boy soldiers throughout history. The experiences all seems to go into them with too much ease, only to come out later as large personal issues. Sad, but this is what war does to people. 

Thank you for reading and commenting. I always appreciate it