The Humpening - 3. Chapter 3

I’m not a boy who can stick his penis just about anywhere and never think about it again. I liked my emotions neatly on a shelf and now they were all over the floor.

We didn’t talk much after we woke up. I think Keith was ashamed of losing his anal virginity. I started wondering if we’d ever be able to treat each other as equals again.

When he dressed up and left, I cuddled with Patrick for a while.

“It was fun,” he said.

“Yeah,” I agreed. For the most part, it was.

“Don’t worry, Bradd. I love only you.”

I wish I could say the same.

***

I didn’t talk to Keith for a day or two but we met after school on Thursday. We exchanged some news and talked about this and that, never mentioning the threesome.

“I tried again with Amy,” he said at some point.

“Cool. So, how was it?”

He shook his head. “Not good. It felt like fucking a wooden plank with a hole in it. She was lying there with her eyes closed; she never moved or made any sound. I had to check if she was asleep.”

“Dude… You’re just like me. You get horny a lot, right?”

“You know it. All the time.”

“I don’t want to be that guy but… I think you should dump her. The sooner, the better.”

I couldn’t believe I was the one saying this. But hey, if Patrick was as deprived of passion as Amy seemed to be, I wouldn’t think twice.

Luckily, that wasn’t the case. Patrick came over on Friday after school and stayed the whole weekend. And what a weekend it was! We tried so many new things. My favorite was our first go at a standing position. My parents were away shopping. I lifted Patrick and supported him against the wall. It was simply amazing. I really had to be grateful to have such a sexually charged and passionate boyfriend. He made every second of it special. Sure, that was a quickie because I had to cum before my arms got tired but it was still the hottest thing we’ve done in my view. It was the best early birthday present I could imagine.

I invited Keith to my place on Monday to play some games and hang out. I’d feel bad to boast about my sexy weekend so I didn’t go into details. But there was something else that was bugging me.

“Keith… Are we cool?”

“Sure. Why wouldn’t we be?”

“I don’t know… I just wanted to make sure.”

“Do you mean that we can’t be friends anymore because you fucked me?”

I felt shivers. Damn… him saying that in the broad daylight felt almost as intense as actually doing it.

“No, not at all… I meant the exact opposite. I’d never forgive myself if I lost you as a friend because of what we did.”

“Don’t worry about it, dude. My ass hurt for two days but my pride is fine. It’s not something I would ever do again but it was cool to experiment. And, as much as I hate to say it, it was way better than anything I’ve had with Amy.”

I chuckled nervously and Keith looked at me intently. “How did you feel about it?” he asked.

“Well… you know you’ve always been my straight crush, dude. There’s a part of me that isn’t one hundred percent over you and that part loved it more than it should… Okay, I’ll be frank. It was the hottest thing I’ve ever done.”

“Hotter than sex with Patrick?”

“Probably… yeah, but Patrick was there, too, so it doesn’t count,” I laughed.

“So it’s good that we tried it. You really did change my mind about telling my grandkids about it one day.”

“You dirty bastard… Anyway, are you coming to my birthday party this Saturday?”

“Sure. Can Amy come, too?”

“Of course. Are you two okay?”

“Yeah… I don’t want to break up with her only because she sucks at sex. I like her as a person, you know? We have fun times together.”

“Sure, dude. Follow your heart, not your dick. I only want you to be in a relationship where you don’t have to pretend you’re someone you’re not.”

“I’m working on it, dude.”

We went for a quick bro hug and changed the topic.

***

I loved my birthday because it was a good opportunity to meet and have fun, but I also hated when things were about me. Everyone who knew me knew that presents were strictly forbidden and would land in the trash without even being opened. Our house wasn’t big so I would usually only invite a few of my closest friends. My 15th birthday was no exception. Except for Patrick, Keith and Amy there were only three boys and two girls I hung out with the most at school.

No one brought any presents but they brought some beer. I hated alcohol but decided they can do what they want, as long as they don’t puke on the couch or on my head. But the biggest surprise came along with Keith and Amy.

“Hi, I’m Earl. Happy birthday, yadda yadda yadda.” The confident twelve-year-old owner of the pubescent voice shook my hand and just walked around me to look around the house. My parents were kind of strict about taking off your shoes in my house and that strictness kind of rubbed off on me, but before I could protest, Earl was already in the dining room making friends.

“Who the fuck is that?” I whispered to Keith after Amy went to use the toilet.

“Amy’s little brother, Earl. Sorry I didn’t give you heads up. Amy’s parents suddenly decided she has to stay home and babysit her brother so here we are.”

“He seems like quite a handful.”

“A handful? He’s a little devil. If he gets out of control, we can tie him up and lock in the broom cupboard”

“We don’t have a broom cupboard, dude.”

“You know what I mean.”

Earl wasn’t your typical shy boy. He was talking to and joking with everyone. He was telling story after story, going from sitting to jumping on the couch to doing a silly dance in the middle of the room to grabbing both of Keith’s legs and pretending he was crying and begging for forgiveness. By the look of it, all the girls were in love with him and the boys wanted him dead. I didn’t really mind him until he sat back on the couch and put his shoes on the table right next to a bowl of chips. Keith must’ve seen that I was getting red in the face.

“Get your feet off the table, you’re not in your room,” he said.

“And you’re not my mom,” Earl retorted, unfazed.

“I won’t say it again, get them off!”

“Kiss my ass, Keith,” Earl chuckled and put his hands behind his head comfortably, wiggling his shoes provocatively.

That was enough, the little shit was starting to feel too entitled. Not at my house. I was on the other side of the room when it happened and I stood up among the silence.

“Earl, come here for a second,” I said calmly.

Earl’s smile faded. I told you, I could be really intimidating if I wanted. I don’t know where it came from, I never trained for it, I never bullied anyone. What mattered was, Earl hung his head in shame and walked to me. Not gonna lie, it was pretty satisfying to watch.

“Follow me,” I said and led him to the small guest bedroom. I showed him an old chair that stood there for at least a decade for no apparent reason. He sat down.

“Earl,” I said but my voice was calm as a lake. “You broke two rules of my house. You know what they are?”

“Don’t put my shoes on the table?” Earl mumbled. His transformation was a behavioral miracle.

“Very good. And the other one?”

Silence, followed by “I don’t know,” barely audible.

“The other rule is - don’t offend my guests. You broke both in a span of ten minutes. You are lucky you got away without spanking. Do you understand?”

“...yes.”

“Now sit here and think about your behavior until I tell you you can come out.”

“...”

“What was that?”

“Okay.”

“Good. See you later,” I said and closed the door and returned to the party.

“How did you do it?” Amy asked when I made myself comfortable back on the couch.

“I just used my natural charm,” I shrugged. “I’ll let him think about his behavior for a while but I think he learned his lesson.”

“If you agree to babysit Earl from time to time, my parents will cover you with gold, Bradd. No one ever managed to get him to obey like that.”

“I’ll think about it. He looks like he’s used to bossing everyone around.”

“Tell me about it,” she said.

“Hey!” Keith interrupted, “he listens to me, too!”

Amy smiled ironically. “Babe… please, you know he treats you like a doormat.”

Everyone laughed and Keith blushed. I felt really bad about him and tried to relax him by talking to him about other stuff but he seemed to have taken that personally.

Still, the time flew by, and before I knew it, Earl had been serving his punishment for an hour. I totally forgot about the little dude! When I opened the door to the guest room, I found him sitting on the chair right where I left him.

“Earl?” I said and he looked up at me. “What did you learn today?”

“That I shouldn’t put my shoes on furniture,” he recited as he’s been practicing it for the whole hour.

“Very good. What else?”

He took a quick breath and looked at the opposite wall, like a student trying to remember something he learned by heart. “I also learned that I shouldn’t offend your guests.”

“Make it - ‘don’t offend anyone’. Other than that, very good!” I praised and Earl lit up. “If you promise me to behave, then your punishment is over.”

“I promise, Bradd!” he exclaimed eagerly. To be perfectly honest, I had no idea what made him look up to me so much. This was pretty rewarding. I should talk to Patrick about having kids one day.

The rest of the party was pretty fun. Earl was mostly listening to conversations and only adding something when he really had something to say. His shoes were left in the hall and he was walking around in his short, white socks. Patrick was sitting closely next to me and I had my arm wrapped around his neck. The boys were chugging beers but no one made any mess and it was a good time. That is until Keith decided to stand up and go to the bathroom, but before he could make a single step, he collapsed on the floor.

I jumped to my feet to check on him. “Keith!”

“I’mmm finneee…” he mumbled. Great. He was completely wasted.

“Take him to the bathroom before he pisses his pants,” Earl said with a grin. I gave him a severe look and he covered his mouth with his hands.

I helped Keith to his feet but it was as if his legs were made of jelly. Good thing I was a strong boy because he wasn’t helping me at all. I escorted him to the bathroom and made him sit on the toilet to avoid accidents before closing the door and waiting for him outside. I heard him humming to himself while he went and I sighed. It really wasn’t his day.

After two minutes, all fell silent and I knocked on the door. “You finished?”

There was no reply, so I opened the door. Keith was snoring gently on the toilet, his soft penis out in the open. Even in his current state, he was one of the hottest creatures I’ve ever seen. I couldn’t believe Amy was taking him for granted. I woke him up and helped him dress. Then I led him to the guest room where Earl had just been serving his punishment and helped him lay down on the bed. I took off his jeans, his shirt and left him just in his boxer briefs. He was snoring again by the time I was finished.

I was about to rejoin the party but something made me sit next to Keith and shamelessly watch his body. So that was it. I still had a crush on him. Despite my great relationship with Patrick and despite what I had done with Keith, I was jealous of Amy that she could call him his boyfriend. She will never satisfy him the way he deserves to, not in a million years!

I looked at the door to make sure no one was coming. Then I slid Keith’s boxers down to his thighs and grabbed his dick that was still pretty big in its soft state. I played with it for a minute, sliding off skin up and down and watching how his glans came to view rhythmically.

“I love you so much, Keith,” I whispered and took him into my mouth. I never thought I could be so hungry for a dick but there I was, my mouth full, while his girlfriend and my boyfriend were in the other room. I started sucking him the best I could as if trying to make up for the shitty day he’s had. His penis was so meaty and tasty! It quickly chubbed up but never got completely hard. I didn’t mind. I found it difficult to fit him in my mouth as it was. I totally lost myself in playing with his tool. If someone came from behind, I probably wouldn’t even notice until they tapped me on my back. But it was Keith who caught me.

“I’m sorry, man, I’m too drunk to get hard,” he whispered and I jumped back.

“I… I’m sorry… I thought you were… I was…” I stuttered.

“You’re my best friend in the world, man, I love you too,” he mumbled and turned to his side.

I was lost for words, so I took a blanket, covered him and turned off the light. Then I left without a word and rejoined the others.

I don’t think Keith was really missed. Patrick still kept close to me and Amy was talking to girls from my class. Earl was arm wrestling with one of the boys who was pretending the struggle to be equal. Meanwhile, I was trying to sort out my feelings.

“Okay, Earl, we’re going home,” Amy said an hour later. It was getting close to midnight. “Help me wake up Keith.”

A minute later, noises from the guest room prompted me to check on them.

“Wake up, dude!” Earl was poking Keith who was out of his senses.

“You promised to walk us home!” Amy complained.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll go with you,” I offered. “Better let him sleep, he needs to rest.”

Amy agreed so I kissed Patrick goodbye, put on my shoes, and then Earl, Amy, and I left the party.

We were walking in silence for a while when Earl spoke out of nowhere.

“Why don’t you have a girlfriend, Bradd?”

“Because I’m gay,” I said with a chuckle.

“No you’re not,” Earl said with confidence.

“Earl!” Amy scolded him.

“What makes you think that?” I chuckled, unfazed.

“You’re a normal guy, not like Keith,” Earl shrugged.

“You have it all wrong, Earl. Just because Keith isn’t masculine, it doesn’t mean he’s gay or straight. He happens to be straight and I happen to be gay, that’s it.”

Earl looked at me suspiciously. “You make it sound like being gay is only about liking boys and not girls.”

“But that’s exactly how it works!” I was openly laughing but Earl was dead serious. “If you’re a boy and like girls, you’re straight. If you like boys, you’re gay. It doesn’t matter how masculine or feminine you are.

“That’s bullshit,” Earl said, unconvinced.

“Earl, language!” Amy said.

“It’s fine, Amy,” I said. “But it’s not bullshit, Earl. Don’t believe everything your friends tell you.”

Earl seemed lost in thoughts for the rest of the walk. I probably destroyed his world view and he needed to make sense of it all over again.

“We’re here,” Amy said after a minute or two. “Thanks, Bradd, you’ve been great. Great party, too. Tell Keith to text me when he wakes up.”

“I will Amy, thanks for coming.” I ruffled her brother’s hair. “Take care, Earl. And remember to behave.”

“Bye Bradd,” he smiled at me shyly.

I was about to turn around when Amy stopped me.

“Bradd… do you have a moment?”

“Yeah sure.”

“Earl, go inside, I need to talk to Bradd alone.”

I had a bad feeling about it and got a little nervous while watching the unhappy Earl disappear inside the house.

“So, what’s up?” I asked innocently.

“Bradd, I know you’re very close with Keith…”

“Uhm, yeah, he’s my best friend.”

“Yeah, I know. I know that it means he shares with you stuff he doesn't share even with me. And that’s fine, I understand it but… if I can ask… were you talking maybe about me and him recently?”

“Uh, no, not really, nothing I can remember off the top of my head,” I lied, imagining Amy lying motionlessly in bed, unresponsive to Keith’s efforts.

“Oh, okay,” she said. “See, Keith and I have been together for a while and recently I started making suggestions that we should start, you know, having sex.”

“Oh, really?” I said, controlling my voice.

“Yeah… he didn’t seem crazy about the idea but eventually agreed. And when it finally happened… he seemed totally uninterested. I don’t know how to say this. I tried everything and didn’t manage to get him hard. Do you think he’s not into me?”

“Oof, I really don’t know, Amy,” I said, scratching the back of my head and recalling how rock-hard Keith was every time we messed around. “He’s only had good things to say about you. Maybe he’s just nervous. Give him time.”

“That’s the problem,” she said, “I don’t think he wants there to be another time.”

I didn’t know what to say. This was the complete opposite from what Keith told me. I needed time to make sense of it.

“I will try to talk to him discreetly. Maybe I’ll learn something,” I just said.

“That’s very sweet of you, Braddy,” she said and hugged me. “How about you and Patrick, are you alright?”

“Yeah, we’re great… sex is great, we get along fine,” I said, blushing.

“Good to hear. I’m happy for you guys. You look so cute together. Okay, I need to go back now before Earl sets home on fire.

“Bye, Amy.”

My mind was a mess as I was walking back home. So many thoughts to process. So many details to analyze.

My friends were just leaving when I came back. I wished them a good night and walked to my room. Patrick was already in bed, waiting on me.

I quickly lost my clothes and we made out. My dick couldn’t be wrong. I was very horny for him.

“Not today, babe,” Patrick said when I started getting in a lovemaking position. “I was too lazy to clean myself up. I’m sorry”

“Don’t worry, Patrick, we have all day tomorrow, right?”

“Oh yeah,” my boyfriend whispered and gave my sensitive dick a few sensual strokes. We kissed for a few more minutes and then Patrick said goodnight and we went to sleep.

At least he did. I was lying there for an hour on my back, watching my erection tenting the cover while Patrick was sleeping peacefully next to me. I decided to go and pee to lose my boner. It helped partially and when I flushed, my penis was down to half mast.

Then, I remembered that Keith was still in the guest room so came in to check on him. I sat on the edge of the bed next to him and nudged him gently.

“Keith?” I whispered?

“Bradd” he said weakly. It was dark but I could see his face and tired eyes. “I got drunk, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it. Do you need something? Water?”

“No, I’m fine,” he said. “Had weird dreams. At least I didn’t puke. Why aren’t you in bed?”

“I don’t know, I couldn’t sleep.”

“Where’s Patrick?” he asked.

“In the other room.”

“Oh. Okay. You can go back to sleep, dude. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine.”

“Okay,” I said but didn’t move an inch.

“Aren’t you going?” Keith chuckled.

“Do I have to?”

“You came here for something else, huh?” Keith whispered slowly.

“Yes,” I admitted and placed my hand on his chest.

“Then come and take it,” he said.

I slid my hand down to his shorts and he was hard as a rock. We quickly got rid of our underwear and lay on top of him, pressing our boners together. Being naked with him was so hot I could barely believe it. I gave him a little peck on the lips to test the waters. He didn’t react so I planted a longer kiss and we started making out. Fuck, I almost came. I was devouring his mouth and touching the sides of his body, while grinding my erection against Keith’s. His arms were around my neck and he was kissing me back eagerly.

Suddenly, Keith reached down, grabbed my dick and spread his legs, aiming my shaft at his hole. I shuddered in excitement.

“Are you sure, dude?”

“Yeah man, go for it.”

“But dude… you’re straight, we’re friends… and Amy…”

“Yeah, and Patrick,” Keith said. “I don’t care. I love you more than I love her.”

“I love you more than I love Patrick, too,” I said, unable to believe I just said it.

“Then what are you waiting for?” Keith asked. He lifted and bent his knee, giving me better access to his ass. I really didn’t need to be told twice. I adjusted myself and pressed against his tight hole. In just one minute, I was inside and making my way all the way up his hot tunnel.

“Oh fuck, man,” Keith moaned, holding my neck tight. “Does this ever get old?”

“I don’t think so,” I said and started moving inside him rhythmically.”

“Shit, it feels so good,” he whispered and I was sure I could see tears in his eyes.

“It’s amazing dude…”

I couldn’t believe I was making love to my straight school friend. I couldn’t believe we were cheating on our partners. I couldn’t believe I had no regrets about it. I was in heaven.

“You know, we don’t have to kiss if you don’t want to,” I suggested, not losing my rhythm. But I guess he did want to kiss me because he pulled me down and pressed our lips together. We were sword fighting with our tongues as I was giving him all I had. My entire dick’s length was buried deep inside Keith’s ass and I was plowing him with passion. His moves or technique weren’t better than Patrick - after all, Keith was very inexperienced. But for some reason, having sex with him felt finally… right. Like making love to someone’s soul! Keith was looking me in the eyes at all times while letting out soft whimpers. I felt myself falling deeply in love.

“Oh yes… fuck…” I grunted and came like a billion fireworks. Keith started jerking himself off vigorously and joined me in my orgasm before I finished shooting.

We held each other while recovering from our orgasms.

“Whew,” I said and smiled at my friend.

“Yeah…” he smiled back at me. “You should go back to Patrick now, before he notices you’re gone.”

“Yeah…” I said, still smiling at him. “Oh, and I just remembered. Amy said you should text her when you wake up.”

“I will do that now, dude, thanks for letting me know.”

“No problem, man. I think I’ll go now and… yeah.”

“Yeah.”

I cleaned us very briefly, put on my boxers and staggered back to bed with Patrick. My boyfriend was sleeping like a baby and after a few minutes, so was I.