A Gift for Mom - 1. A Gift for Mom

A Gift for Mom

"Doctor...!"

I peek out of the book 'Life Must Go On'. It's nurse Carol, a brunette with icy blue eyes and a lithe body, who was both strong and confident, despite being senior in age. But now she looks different. I can sense there is something unusual from her look. Like she wants to tell me something but doesn't know how.

"What is it, sister?" I ask with a calm voice.

"It's an accident case, sir--an emergency." She betrays a panicky voice.

I know the accident is not the reason she's stressing out. Being near the highway, accident cases are normal in this hospital, and as a senior, she has handled many of that type of case.

"Anything special, Carol?" I ask.

"You sh... You should come, an... And see!" Saying that, she walks out of the room I call my office. I follow her, instantly.

"A hit and run case. Someone called 911. He’s in pretty bad shape. Bruises all over his body and a severe head injury," she explains, walking alongside me.

In the distance, a man is lying on a stretcher in bloody clothes. When I get to him, I look into the man's face for the assumption of first aid hypothesis. My mind flips. My thoughts whirl. I feel like I'm stuck in a small space with no air to breathe.

The man on the stretcher is me. No, not me, I mean we both look alike. I don't know how to explain it; same eyes, same nose, same face. Everything is the same but he looks older--much older, about my father's age. Carol looks from me to him and him to me.

"You both look alike, Dr. Samuel. Like a Xerox copy."

I can feel everyone's eyes on us. I am confused myself. My mind is wary and running through every possibility it can think of. It looks like my life was built on a secret that I was never privy to. But with him in front of me, I think I just did. It may be the time to put an end to this ignorance.

"Doctor...!" The concerned voice of Carol brings me to Earth and makes me aware of my duty.

"We have to take him to surgery immediately. Can you call Dr. Victor?" I was speaking in auto-mode. Carol ran for him, and he is by my side within the next minute.

He is as surprised as me. "Do we have to take blood samples from you both?"

I know that question is directed towards me. No, I say to myself, there is no need for any DNA test to tell that we are blood related. God made us like that. There is no room for doubt.

"I am not feeling well. Can you attend this case for me Vic?"

"With pleasure!" he replies, understanding my condition.

With that, I walk out of the hospital. My house is just 5 minutes away by car, but it takes 15 minutes if I walk. I now have a lot of time to think; a lot of time to clear my mind.

I lost my mother when I was born. Don't get me wrong. She isn't dead; she just isn't there for me. I don't know why, but she hates me a lot. She will beat on me without any reason, and beat me more if I cry. Being always drunk, she never misses a chance to scold me. Everything with me is a new reason for her lash out at me: my food, my clothes, my education--everything. She even curses my father, who comes to the rescue from her cruelty.

My father is a man of extreme love and generosity. He is always patient and peaceful. He loves me a lot. He has always taken good care of me. A smile is always on his face, even after my mother is cruel to him because of me. I know he loves my mother as much as he loves me. I am still in that house only because of him. I can't leave him alone with my mother. It's not that she is a danger to my father, but she just never stops antagonizing him.

All I had ever seen, from my childhood up until now, was my mother's hate towards me. All those beatings, all those cries and all that sadness, I grieve over them. How can a mother hate her one and only son so much? Tears started to fall from my eyes.

Because of the night shift, my parents never expect me until morning. I know I'll get a mouthful if I wake my mom. But this had to be done right now. So, sighing heavily, I ring the doorbell to my house. After a minute, my dad opens the door, somewhat surprised to see me at this time of night.

"Sam! What happened, son?" A sense of concern is in his voice.

"Hopeless shit, we are trying to sleep here! Don't you have any manners to wake us up in the middle of the night?" I can hear my mother shouting from her room. I can tell she is drunk again. I can't think of any particular reason today.

"I have to talk with you, Dad!"

"Go get some sleep. We can talk in the morning."

"No, Dad! It's an emergency. Can you please come to the back porch?" Saying that, I walk to back of the house.

"What happened, son?" He follows me, and I stand there, saying nothing. Silence consumes us for some time.

"Is everything alright, Sam?" Dad asks.

I'm trying my best not to cry, but I break down in front of him. I am weeping like a child in front of my father.

"What happened! Why are you crying?" Worry fills his voice as he says that. I don't know what to say or how to ask, but I have to know everything.

"Can you honestly tell me the truth to my question?" I know that's a stupid question to ask my father. He'll always be sincere and true when I ask about anything.

"Tell me what happened!"

I am silent for some time. My mind is racing as fast as a racehorse to ask the question without hurting my father too much, but with no success.

"Am I really your s...?" I trail off. I can't ask him, although he's waiting for me to complete what I had begun. Building all the strength I have left, I ask. "Are you really my father?"

He becomes sadder rather than surprised. I know that question is hurting him more than I can imagine. He only drops his head and falls silent. With my father, I know silence is acceptance. So I continue.

"There's an accident case at the hospital. There is a man who appears to be the same age as you, give or take a year." I sigh. "No one has to tell me that he is my..."

"Will you please stop? I can't listen anymore!" Dad is speaking with some anger added to his voice. We are silent a while longer. I can see that grief is consuming him.

"I never wanted you to know this. But who am I to prevent it, if destiny herself leads us to this day? I'll tell you everything that happened."

Then Dad sat me down and described this chilling story, which once was our fate.

****-----****

Your mother and I had been married for two years when...our lives changed forever. Jessica was an orphan in the orphanage my father funded. I fell in love with her almost instantly. Your grandfather is a man of prestige and order. He never wanted an orphan to be his daughter-in-law. He wanted me to act against my will and threatened me to disowning me. So I left my parents and their money to marry your mother. After we got married, we started our middle class life with a low salary and a lot of travelling.

Being a medical representative, I was out of town most of the time. Even after two years, we hadn't been blessed with a child. We even consulted a doctor who told us, we have no medical problems.

On one unfortunate day, I was out of town as usual. That night a burglar broke into our house and stole our valuables and money. Before he left, he sexually assaulted your mother. The next day, when I returned from my medical tour, I found Jessica unconscious. It took many weeks for Jessica to recover. We even moved to another city, hoping a change of environment would help. But no luck was with us at all.

I never reported this to anyone, afraid of what my parents and society might do or might say. I was more concerned about your mother's health and mental condition. She tried to kill herself two times. I even made her consult a psychiatrist, and thought she would recover from what had happened. I was wrong. After two months, we learned that Jessica was pregnant. She wanted to abort, but I convinced her not to do so.

In my mind, whatever had happened was an unfortunate thing. I never considered it to be Jessica's fault, as she thought it was. After the hell of nine months for us both, at last she gave birth to a boy. You. On her first look at you, she knew, we both knew, you were that burglar's son. You looked like him. So she hated you from that very moment. She even tried to kill you once. To save you from her, I was always with you and raised you as my own.

I love you son. I loved your mother too. So I quit the travel job I had and started that medical pharmacy. I can't leave either of you for the other. I tried my best to keep you and your mother safe. I succeeded in giving you a better life. But I failed for your mother's health condition. I failed. I am sorry you’ve had so much heartache growing up.

****-----****

'It never was your fault dad. You don't have to say sorry. You have done everything a real father cannot do for their own child.' I wanted to say it aloud. But I don't have to. Because he can see that through my eyes as I sat at his feet. He gives me a weak smile and pulls me into a hug before he kissed me on my head. And I know that he is crying.

Hearing all this made me sadder. I'm crying through the whole story. My mother hates me because of the man who raped her. My very existence reminds her of the horrible thing that happened to her. Am I the reason she and my father suffer from this pain? Am I the reason--am I? Maybe not.

It's not me. It's him. It's the man who is currently getting treatment to live. Is my mother the only one suffering because of him? Are there more? Does he even deserve to live? Does he? My mind and heart are both saying, 'No'.

"Can't you both see I am trying to sleep here?" We are startled to see my mother standing at the door and looking furious. I am afraid she heard what we were talking about, but she leaves saying nothing.

"I need to go to the hospital," I say, breathing a sigh of relief.

"Why now? Can't you rest?" My father pleads with a concerned voice.

"I have some errands to complete. I'll return by breakfast time." I leave, heading for the hospital.

I know what I am about to do. It's not vengeance. It never was. But there needs to be some justice. Every crime should be punished.

Victor briefs me as I enter the hospital. "His condition is somewhat stable, Sam. But we cannot guarantee it for about another 48 hours."

"I'll take a look at him." He nods in agreement and then leaves for his office.

I know it will be enough to increase or decrease some amount of oxygen. It will work. So, putting my idea into effect, I enter into the room where my biological fa-- no, I can't call him that. The thought itself tastes like venom in my mouth. I refocus, concentrating on what I came here to do. Whatever it is I am doing, I feel no wrong.

My duty is finished. Signing the papers and giving my cases to others, I go home. Dad is not there. Maybe he left early to open the pharmacy. Mom is in the kitchen, which is unusual for her, that early in the morning. I walk in to fetch some coffee from the pot and sit at the table. She is baking something, so doesn't see me yet.

"M... Mother." It was the first time I called her that after so many years.

"What do you want?" She is so calm asking that, which is strange.

"I have to tell you something." She just nods her head, letting me know that she is listening. "He is dead, Mother. I killed him."

She isn't at all surprised or shocked. She just nods her head again and says, "It’s good. You did good."

I am shocked. Mom must see it. She says, with a serious tone, "I heard everything last night. I thought, if you were my son you'd do it. If you were his son, you wouldn't. And you did it. Finally, that evil piece of shit is dead."

I can't believe my own ears right now. She called me her son. I see my mom in a new light. I am overcome by new emotions.

"Is this gonna bother you? Cause trouble with your job?"

"No. No one knows. Only you and me."

"And one more thing. Don't tell any of this to your father. He is a good man. He would never harm any being and would never want us to do so. He has borne so much in his life. He's been disowned by his parents and their money, living like a low-level employee, putting up with my health conditions, enduring my taunts and all. He is so patient with everything and faces each problem with a smile."

I don't know when I started to cry, but so does mom. We both cry silently while I listen to her.

"When you were born, I wanted both of you to live a better life than me. I always did. That is why I did all the taunting. I even pretended that I was going to kill you too to get him to take you and leave me, to have a better life just the two of you. But he never left me, not even for your sake. That really made me angry, and I scolded him more. But you both never left me. I was a fool to think that he would have ever left me."

There is a silence for some time. No one speaks. Then, breaking the silence, she says, "I can't deny that I hated you. But it's only because of that scum. Your father, Leo, may have blindsided the truth or forgotten it entirely. But I couldn't. I couldn't forget it as long as he, that scum, was breathing the same air. Finally, you gave him what he deserved. And I appreciate it."

All the time, I was wrong. I always thought she hated me. But she hated him, that man who ruined three lives. And I was wrong that she was being cruel to me and my father. She wanted us to live a better life. I was wrong. I was so wrong.

"Mother..."

"Yes, son?"

"Can I hug you once?"

"Come here dear..." She holds open her arms and I dive into them, she embraces me. We are both now crying openly and all the hate, all those years are melting down with these tears.

"I am sorry, son. I have never been a mother to you."

"I am sorry too, mom. I never understood."

For the first time, a mother got herself a son, and a son got himself a mother.

"I love you, mom..."

"I love you too, son..."

--The End--