A Second Chance - 7. Farewell

(Adam)

Laying in royal blue sheets in the comfortable king-size bed, Kaleo and I were pressed against each other, our breathing being the only sound in the room.

As I gently caressed his long, black hair and placed a tender kiss on the top of his head, my heart ached for him. Losing a grandparent that one is so close to, as Kaleo was to his grandpa, can be so rough.

I didn't even know the old man very well, but I couldn't help the feeling of sadness that nested in my heart. I had only briefly met the pleasant man during my short stay on Poa, but I could see that he was a kind and warm soul who loved his grandson very much.

Kaleo had certainly lost someone very dear to him, but I was determined to be there for him every step of the way.

Seeing his packed suitcase near the door, I wondered if he had decided to come with me before this happened, or had he packed just because it was his last day at the hotel. Of course, I didn't want to raise the issue at that point. That could wait another day after this entire ordeal is over. For now, my priority was to assure Kaleo that he has my support.

"I'm sorry, baby. I know you loved him a lot and he loved you too," I softly said, my lips almost touching his silky hair strands.

"He did... And I loved him so much. You know, when we were still living on the island, when I was just a boy, he would always teach me things about our tradition and beliefs."

"That's nice. Were you a good student?"

"Not really," Kaleo chuckled. "I just wanted to learn how to swim and hunt. I didn't care much about folklore. You know, he even told me stories about Hiri, but I thought she was just a legend."

"Wow, who knew, huh?" I smiled at him.

"Exactly. I don't think Pa fully believed it either until..."

"Yeah. I'll always be grateful to her."

"Me too. And to you," he said and hugged me tighter.

I kissed his temple and pressed his head against my chest, feeling him breathe in and out.

"Poor Pa, he died alone there..." Kaleo moaned.

"Hey, he knew you were thinking about him. And he was happy you got better," I tried to reassure him as best I could. I knew words could do little at that point, but I would sure as hell try my best.

"I just wish I’d been there for him. I wanted to spend more time with him."

"I know, baby, I know," I whispered. "At least you got to see him shortly before he died."

Kaleo pulled out of my embrace and looked at me with his watery eyes.

"I want to go there and say goodbye to him. The funeral is tomorrow, so I can't make it, but I still want to go the first chance I get."

"Of course, honey," I nodded. "Do you want me to book us the tickets?"

"Oh, you want to go with me?" he asked, surprise showing in his eyes.

"Well, of course... That is if you want me to?"

"Of course I do," he looked at me with appreciation and raised a hand, pressing it gently against my cheek. The warmth of his skin felt wonderful and I couldn't resist leaning into it and closing my eyes, cherishing the moment of closeness.

"I'd love for you to come with me, I just wasn't sure you'd have the time."

I opened my eyes and took his hand, kissing the palm of it.

"Don't sweat it. I'll take a few days off work, I don't think it's gonna be a problem."

"Thank you," he gave me a light kiss on the lips that made me tingle all over, then got up and went to the bathroom to wash his face.

When he came back, tears washed away but his eyes still moist, he noticed his suitcase and remembered.

"Oh, I have to go and check out today."

"Yeah, why don't we go," I stood up and walked up to him, taking him by the hands. "I'll drive us to my place, order some take out and we can book our plane tickets from there."

"Ok," he squeezed my hand, managing a slight smile.

The evening went as expected - Kaleo was not in a great mood, which was completely understandable, but I think my being there helped him. We booked tickets to Hawaii - for an afternoon flight in three days; from there, we would take a ship to Poa. I know I often thought about returning to the island someday, but I didn't think it would be under these circumstances.

I went to Mr. Perry’s office the next day to inform him about my need for absence from work. Even though he was the director general, he didn’t have one of those grand offices with expensive leather furniture and a panoramic view of the city. On the contrary, it was the same as most other offices: just a large computer table, a couple of chairs and floor-to-ceiling cabinets stretching along one of the walls. Stylish and modern, but not over the top.

Taking a seat in one of the chairs, I asked him about taking a few days off, explaining the situation with Kaleo. He readily agreed, telling me to take as many days as I needed, for which I was so grateful. He also told me to come by his office after lunch to arrange paying a visit to Doug’s parents. I said yes right away, as I wanted to go there and see what kind of people would kick out their own son. I was lucky that I never had such problems with my own mom and dad, since they accepted who I was without a hitch, so it was difficult for me to understand how someone could just abandon their own child like that.

Next day around noon, Mr. Perry and I got into his car and headed off to make the dreaded visit. The ride to their house was mostly silent. I thought about what we’d say to them and truth be told, somewhere deep down I was hoping we’d be able to change their minds. I knew it was an unlikely prospect, but the optimist in me believed it could happen. To be perfectly honest, I was also afraid… Afraid that they would be the scum I imagined them to be and that I wouldn’t be able to contain myself. Nonetheless, I wanted to talk to them.

As we were approaching their house, I saw a man and a woman, presumably Doug’s mom and dad, taking out some boxes from the house and putting them on the front lawn. Were they moving out?

“Are those Doug’s parents?” I asked Mr. Perry, pointing at the busy couple.

“Yep, that’s them. Let’s go,” he said as he pulled over and parked in their driveway.

The man had just walked back inside, leaving the woman alone. As she saw us coming, she stood by the front door, observing us curiously. She looked to be in her late thirties, with messy brown hair and a plain dress coupled with pink crocs.

“How may I help you?” she asked in a nasal voice, not trying to be particularly polite.

“Good afternoon, are you Mrs. Graham?” Mr. Perry said, standing right in front of her.

I stood to the side, glancing at the boxes and noticing some of them were full of clothes. Others had CDs, toys and some computer equipment. I had a feeling I knew who they belong to.

“Yes, that’s me. And you are?”

“I’m Roger Perry, director of children’s institution ‘Sunshine’. I’d like to talk to you about your son Doug,” he said formally, as if he was a police officer conducting an investigation, handing her his business card in the process.

The woman’s face seemed to turn to stone at the mention of her son. She opened her mouth to speak when her husband opened the door.

“Honey, have you seen…” he came out and stopped when he saw us. “Oh, can we help you?”

“They’re here to ask about…”

“We’re from the children’s shelter ‘Sunshine’ and we’d like to talk to you about your son,” Roger interrupted her. A moment of uncomfortable silence ensued.

“We have no son,” the man said icily and went back inside, slamming the door behind him.

“I can’t believe this,” I shook my head, getting angrier by the minute. The woman must have noticed it because she looked at me strangely.

“You two better leave, we have nothing to talk about,” she said sternly.

“On the contrary, we have a lot to talk about,” Roger exclaimed. “You’re a disgrace to all parents and should be ashamed of yourselves. Do you have any idea how Doug has been feeling these last few days?” he spat out, looking at Mrs. Graham as if he was ready to slap her across the face.

“What he did was wrong. We gave him everything and this is how he repays us? He almost gave Rob and me a heart attack!”

“Are you seriously making this all about you?” I said, trying my best to keep calm, however difficult it was. “Doug is the one who’s been heartbroken, who’s feeling hopeless, and all you think about is yourself?”

“Who are you to lecture me about my son?” she asked with disdain, moving toward the door.

“I thought your husband said you had no son?”

My words caused her to stop and turn to us again.

“If Doug comes to his senses and decides to return and apologize, our door will be open for him.”

“Doug doesn’t need to and will not do any of that. He’ll get more care at the shelter than he ever got with you. If you and your husband realize just how wrong you are, you’re welcome to come and visit Doug, if he decides he wants to see you,” Mr. Perry said.

“What’s in the boxes?” I asked before she had a chance to go back inside.

“Uh, just some things we don’t need anymore. We left them out for people to take if they need anything.”

“You mean Doug’s things?” I raised my eyebrows, showing I wasn’t in the mood for her nonsense.

“Yes, they were Doug’s things,” she replied, emphasizing the past tense.

“Then we’ll take them.” Mr. Perry immediately bent down, stacked one of the boxes on top of another and picked them up. I took the other two and headed toward the car, but stopped and turned around.

“Doug is going to be fine, we’ll make sure of that. But you and your husband are making a big mistake and I just hope you don’t regret it later.”

Mrs. Graham stood silently, looking lost. If I didn’t know any better, I’d feel sorry for her, but the only one I felt sorry for was Doug.

After putting his stuff on the back seat, we got into the car and drove off. The main question on my mind was what to tell the kid without hurting him even more? No doubt he would be glad to get his stuff back, but did he really have to know the cruel truth – that his parents already acted like they never had a son? I wasn’t so sure about that.

In the end, I decided to sleep on the matter and leave it until after I returned from Poa. Kaleo and I would be travelling the next day, and I would be able to think more clearly about the whole Doug situation after we return.

(Kaleo)

I was shifting around in the lounge leather chair, trying to make myself comfortable, but it was impossible! I don't know if it was the awkward shape of the chair or the fact that my brain was a mess. Finally, I gave up and plopped down, my one suitcase at my feet. I tried to focus on watching other passengers go through the O'Hare Airport while I was waiting for Adam to return from the toilet. My mind kept going back to my last moments with Pa. I tried remembering the last thing I told him before I left the island, but I just couldn't recall. All I knew was that I missed him dearly.

My phone buzzing in my pocket startled me and interrupted my train of thought.

"Mitch, what the...?" I thought as I saw the name of a person I already nearly forgot.

"Hello."

"Yeah, this is Kaleo. Hey, I didn't expect to hear from you so soon."

"Oh, really? That's... that's very generous of you, thank you."

"I will definitely think about it, but would it be ok if I called you in a few days? I have a family emergency... My grandpa passed away... Thank you, I appreciate it."

"Thank you again, Mitch, I'll call you when I get back," I hung up, feeling strange.

Actually, I felt hopeful, which was definitely an unusual sentiment for me after these last few days. This random call, coming completely out of the blue, shone a light and gave me a glimmer of hope that things might just work out.

Adam arrived soon after my surprise call and we boarded the plane, which was quickly filled to the last seat. The lively conversations of passengers soon filled the cabin and I welcomed the incessant noise as a distraction from my personal woes. On the other hand, all the chatter annoyed me as everyone seemed to be in a good mood, going on a holiday and looking forward to spending a few weeks in the tropical paradise.

I, however, was going in order to say goodbye to my grandpa. Why is it that I only visit Poa when something bad happens? At that point, I made a promise to myself that the next time I went to the island, it would be for pleasure.

I was sad that mom and dad couldn’t come to the island with me, but I understood it completely. It would be just too expensive and complicated for them to fly from Portland to Chicago, and then join me and Adam on this flight. Instead, they booked a flight for next week. Mom was heartbroken about the loss of her dad, and I felt horrible that I had to break the news to her. Then again, maybe it was for the better that she heard it from me rather than from a stranger.

“Hey, you’re awfully quiet,” Adam suddenly said, placing a hand on mine.

I turned from the window to look at him, giving him the best smile I was able to manage at that point. There was nothing to see outside anyway, just the endless whiteness of clouds.

“Sorry, I was just thinking,” I shook my head.

“Should I be worried?”

“No, it’s nothing bad, just… everything that’s been going on lately,” I said vaguely.

I decided not to tell him about moving in or the call from Mitch just yet, not until I was completely sure about everything. I had to get through this trip first. It was already taking a toll on me, but it was something I absolutely had to do.

Affected by the warmth in the cabin and Adam’s body next to mine, I soon fell asleep with my head on Adam’s shoulder. It was probably my most comfortable sleep on a plane ever, and we weren’t even in first class. The flight was uneventful, which was just what I needed to calm my nerves. That didn’t last long, though, because once we got on the ship and started approaching Poa, I became more and more agitated. Everything was suddenly becoming real. I felt like once I stepped on the island, Pa’s death will become final and not just some imaginary, distant notion I heard over the phone. I wasn’t sure I was ready for it.

Adam was by my side the entire time and I was so immensely grateful for that. He didn’t even have to say anything, just him being there was enough.

“When I first came to the island, I had no idea what I was getting myself into,” he chuckled. “I was sitting on the ship, just like I am now, but I was alone then. I just needed some time to myself, a place to get away from everything, and I picked Poa on a whim. Then I ran into you on the ship and I thought – well, here’s someone I’d like to see again!”

“You were so nice,” I recalled the way he helped me with my suitcase.

“And now I’m not?” Adam teased, pretending to be offended by my remark.

“Yeah, totally,” I swatted his hand and rolled my eyes. “Nice is such an understatement!”

He was so amazing, how he managed to make me laugh and take my mind off of my dark thoughts. I was so glad to have him by my side. When I first thought about coming back here, I wasn’t sure if he’d want or be able to come with me, but now that we were here, I couldn’t even imagine making this trip without him.

Stepping foot on Poa was surreal, to say the least. I hadn’t been here in years, but here I was again for the second time in four months. This time, however, the island no longer seemed to be that magical place from my youth as I used to remember it. It was marred by all the recent tragedies, all somehow connected to the island – first my illness, and now Pa’s passing away.

While I used to yearn to return here years ago, to see my childhood home once again, swim in the same waters and breathe in the same air, everything about Poa seemed different now. Yes, I’d always cherish the memories of meeting Adam and finding my cure here, but I realized Poa was definitely not some utopia where all my troubles would somehow magically vanish. It was a mystical and remote place, but the people on it were only humans, living and dying like everyone else.

Well, maybe there was one exception to that… I wondered if we’d see her again this time. We certainly didn’t intend to go into the forest again.

As soon as we got off the ship, Adam and I went to the hotel to check in, after which I wanted to go straight to the cemetery. Even though I was sleepy and tired from all the travelling, I didn’t want to delay the inevitable anymore.

Vicky was there to greet us, or should I say greet me. By her wide-eyed face and the grin she was trying so hard to suppress, I could tell she was surprised to see Adam and me together.

“Kaleo, you’re here,” my sweet cousin opened her arms and gave me a warm hug. “My condolences. We all loved grandpa so much.”

“Thank you. It’s good to see you again, Vicky.”

As we pulled away, I placed a hand on the small of Adam’s back.

“You remember Adam from last time?”

“Yes, of course,” she gave us a knowing look and shook his hand. “Nice to see you again.”

“You too, Vicky. How’ve you been?” Adam replied politely, always a gentleman.

“I’ve been good, thanks. So, you two managed to find each other.”

“Yeah, we did,” I chuckled. “Well, I found him.”

“Not that hard when he left you the address,” Vicky rolled her eyes, making Adam burst into laughter.

After catching up with my cousin and going to our room, Adam and I showered and changed, deciding to head out right away. The cemetery was in a valley east of the town, a ten-minute walk away from the coast.

“How are you holding up?” Adam asked me as we were walking slowly down a dirt road.

“Good, actually,” I replied and I meant it.

I was actually feeling rather confident that I’d be able to go through with it without a problem. However, as we found our way through the narrow path between tombstones and I spotted Pa’s grave next to my grandma’s, I realized that was it. It suddenly all became too real. Crouching down next to it, I let go and my emotions took over. I had no say in the matter, tears were rolling down my cheeks as I thought of all the moments we spent together. Regret and sorrow took me over as I whimpered, trying to find the right words to say. I had it all planned out, but whenever I tried to open my mouth and speak, it felt like something was stuck in my throat and I couldn’t get my words out.

Looking around, I realized Adam wasn’t next to me. He was some distance away, probably not wanting to intrude on a private moment, letting me say goodbye in peace. Finally calming down a bit, I spoke quietly.

“Hi, grandpa.” I looked at his grave, and then at grandma’s, right next to it. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you died… I wasn’t there when grandma died either. You’re together now, at least.”

My legs started to ache from squatting, so I sat down on the grass. Adam quickly came over, thinking I was about to fall over.

“Hey, you ok?” he asked, putting a hand on my back to hold me up.

“Yeah, I was just sitting down.”

“Oh, ok,” he turned to walk away again, but I held him by the hand.

“That’s alright, stay.”

He sat on the grass next to me, putting an arm around my shoulders.

“Look, Pa, Adam’s here as well. You remember him? He saved my life.” I felt him squeeze my shoulder.

“Mom and dad are coming next week, too.”

With that said, my thoughts went back to when all of us lived together here on Poa. Maybe it’s the nostalgia talking, but I truly had the perfect childhood and I wouldn’t have changed it for the world. I never did like dwelling on the past and thinking about what could’ve been, but I couldn’t help it at that moment. Did I regret us moving to America? I’m still not sure. I don’t know what my life would’ve looked like if I’d stayed here; maybe the island would’ve become too small for me and the desire to explore and go out into the world would’ve awakened in me, causing me to leave anyway.

Either way, I had a good life and despite the recent events, I was hopeful for the future.

Eventually, I got up and wiped my tears away. Adam followed, and after another goodbye to my beloved Pa, we returned to the hotel.

Thank you to all my readers, and of course @glennish! 
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