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Visit to the cemetery went well, I think. It started to rain lightly as I was putting the flowers on his grave, which seemed somehow appropriate. It's only been a month so he has no headstone yet. I need to try and call the funeral home next week and see if they will tell me if the family has enough $ to cover the cost. I know I could just find his sis' number online, but I'm reluctant to do that for reasons I can't quite explain even to myself. Started grief counseling last night. Not sure how well that's going to go, but will give it a try. I have 6 free appointments through my work benefits. Logically, I know what I need to be doing; emotionally.... it's not so easy to actually do. Especially this morning. Trying to focus on our good times together, like our last date -- which the first time we kissed. Sitting in his car with my coat in my lap; had a sweet kiss & told him that he was so handsome. His doubt started to surface, so I took his hand and placed it on my lap under my coat; told him he could feel for himself that I meant what I said, and wasn't just saying it to be nice. His reaction to that, and his response, will always make me smile (no, I won't share what he said). For only being 70 miles apart, it was surprisingly difficult to get together (joked at one point the Universe was trying to keep us apart) but I will always treasure the few times we did have. Told mom I won't be up for long this Christmas: up Monday morning, coming home Tuesday afternoon. Just too soon for a happy joyous holiday celebration. And if my brother says something I'll have to keep myself from hurting him. Thank all of you for your expressions of support.

Include these words: violin, menorah, peppermint ice cream, mistletoe, fireplace, Santa Claus, and a pot of cheese fondue.

So, Sasha started a topic on what sort of nice stuff everyone got. I want to know what sort of weird stuff you all got! I mean, we all have that one relative or friend who just gives really odd presents. Not necessarily bad presents, just stuff that you'd never think to ask for or want or ever buy for yourself, and that make you wonder, why on Earth would this person get me this? Mine was from my brothers' mum. She got me The Encyclopaedia of 5000 Spells. Yup, you read that right. A bona fide spell book, with spells and incantations from pretty much all cultures and all eras. It has instructions on how to make magic mirrors, bind familiars, make a woman stay in the house (!) and curse your enemies. Now, I have absolutely no problem with people who believe in magic or practice Wicca or anything like that, but I don't. (I would call myself a skeptic, except that puts me in the same category as several douchebags I'm not interested in being associated with.) Neither, as far as I know or can possibly imagine (and I've known this woman since I was born), does my brothers' mum. So what in the name of everything unholy would make her think to buy me this book? Of course, flipping through it I've come up with all kinds of interesting fantasy and horror story ideas, so I'll definitely have to thank her the next time I see her for getting me such an awesome gift!

So, I was a bit inspired by the Christmas Tree topic, but thought I'd take it a step further. I'm interested to know about traditions that are particular to where you live, or even to just your family. We have users here from all over the world, so there is so much to choose from. Do you celebrate Christmas? If not, do you celebrate any other holiday around the same time? What do you eat? Do you decorate your house? Do you get a visit from Santa Clause? I really want to know! A thing we do in Scandinavia that I think is pretty unique is the televised advent calendar. Every day in December, there's a short episode of an ongoing story that culminates at Christmas. It's made for kids, and you can buy a calendar in the shops where you open a door every day and there's a picture related to the story. It's how I knew it was nearly Christmas when I was a kid, was when I sat down at 7 in the morning, before school, and watched the advent calendar on telly.

At my house we stay up late Christmas Eve wrapping things for the kids and assembling them. We put out cookies "for Santa." I used to get into arguments with the younger kid when she was very tiny because, "Santa gonna come downna chimney and eat alla cookies!" "But he'll leave PRESENTS." "But he EAT ALLA COOKIES!!!" But she's come to terms with it over time. Then we sneak around filling stockings. Mr. Irri can stay up later than I can. I usually get a lipstick that works on me. Which is amazing, because he's color-blind. It's our annual Christmas miracle.