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Jaro_423

Jaro_423 1,556

Posted

Lovely! Has a real old world feel about it and the lyrical pattern is very clear and lilting almost. Not quite sure how you gained that quality but I think it's in the rather poetic expressions used. A lovely dreamy feel! And a wonderful waking that is very optimistic of the day. Thanks, Al.

  • Like 2
AC Benus

AC Benus 36,635

Posted

Thank you, Jaro. Later on I will post the two stanzas that go between theses. I got carried away with the challenge and broke my own 'two stanza' limitation ;) 

Irritable1

Irritable1 2,081

Posted

I like this. Creation of a dreamspace, and a bonus Dickinson: that second dash, which throws about 5 different interpretations into  the last two lines :blink: That "that" is going to haunt me all day...

  • Like 1
Percy

Percy 973

Posted

I agree with Jaro. There's a lovely old world feel to these stanzas.

  • Like 1

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