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MidnightSecret

Entry posted by MidnightSecret

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- A Confession -



I was reading a blog post earlier, and I never knew how powerful photographs could be, a snapshot of the heart.

I secreatly wish that when I do meet my prince charming, he'll somehow capture my beauty by taking lots of photographs of me. Now I know that this may be a ridiculous wish because in reality, I tend to hate most photos of me-and especially as I feel insecure about my body and my facial expressions that believing that I could be photographed beautifully/interestingly is almost unreal. I would drive all my friends crazy with my pleas to get rid of the photos that make me cringe.



 

There has been times, though, when I have wished for a portrait or two that would be the most beautiful boy of myself that I want the world to see, or maybe a snapshot of the person I see myself when I'm with the people I love... I have delusions of myself looking plain and lovely all at once, revealed to the world only by someone who loves me. This is nothing more than a fantasy and I know that.

 

I guess you could say that vanity is a part of it. But a larger part of it is wanting some tangible memento of some epic love affair I intend to have with my life on earth. It took me a long time to love and accept myself, to have the courage to stand up and say "this is who I am."

 

If you have a lover, you may already be convinced that your love for him is extraordinary and grand. Of course, I understand that all lovers feel this way about themselves and that's what makes it so wonderful. But if you ever do start to doubt the existence of your lover altogether, then would you not want some sort of a tangible object to remind yourself why you loved him from the start? Or something you and your lover have created together that will be around long after both of you are gone?

 

I feel so unfulfilled, and although I may not have a lover yet,

I need to see myself, to embrace myself.

Something to remind me of who I am in times of doubt.

 

And then I look at a photograph like this,

 

 

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and I am stunned and full of so much wonder.

I have not even one photograph like this of myself, taken by a lover and companion.

So that is my secret confession--that one day, out of all the days of my life,

I would love to be caught on camera in such a way

that would tell the photographic story of how well I was beloved

and how much I loved myself.

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Nephylim

That was really beautiful.

 

I would love one of those photographs of me too. My ex never really looked at 'me' and so would never have been able to take a photograph like that, just as he would never be able to appreciate he value of a photograph like that.

 

I hope so much that you find someone to take one of you :)

 

 

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Bleu

When you have a lover, there is so much trust and understanding between you and him/her that you can give yourself entirely to that person. You stop acting, you stop pretending; you reveal your true self.

 

I have taken a few pictures of the kind you posted above, and I have quite a few of myself as well (yes, someone was hogging the camera ;) ).

 

I'm sure you will find your charming photographer.

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