Ever wake up in the morning in such a pissy mood that you would rather crawl under a rock and just die? That's how I felt this morning. For one thing, I'm not a morning person, although lately I'm proud to say that I'm no longer exhibiting nocturnal behavior, such as going to sleep at 5AM and actually waving my father off as he heads to work, like a normal functioning being.

I was supposed to have an interview today, but I'm staying with my mother in Jersey. I didn't feel like driving into Manhattan, since that's a total bitch and takes more time. Then that leaves public transportation. However, that's just as assholic as driving in, especially when there's construction, and they shut down the bus depot. By the time I head to the other one, I'd be late! Grrr!

So here's what I did: I called my mom and said, "F**K it!" I went home, after getting a nice cup of Kona coffee mixed with hot chocolate, my favorite. YUM. And I asked the woman if I could reschedule my interview. I probably blew my chances of getting that job, then again, you never know the generosity level of people.

Yet all is well, for now at least. It turns out that the job I interviewed for last week got back to me, and if the final interview goes well, I'm pretty much hired. I should be happy, because I wanted that job. The employers are totally cool, laid back jetsetters. I would have a really flexible schedule, and easy job taking care of their house or running their errands. But I'm one of those messed up people, that whenever I get something I want, I decide I don't want it anymore. What is wrong with me? Am I one of those people like just like the hunt, the chase, the search, whatever it may pertain to? I'm thinking I am, because this guy I'm talking to, as soon as he started to indicate he liked me back, I'm kind of edging away. GAHHHHH!

SIGH....I'll get over myself in a few days. I'll take that job so I can save up more money to travel. And ironically, the start date of this job is right after I get back from Hawaii. Not bad.

OK, enough of my ramblings about jobs and coffee and my numerous mind issues. :wacko:

I have my defensive driving course tonight and tomorrow. It's two consecutive evenings, probably lecture style or something. Dear God, help me to not fall asleep. I'm so bitter about that ticket still and that assface lawyer who didn't help me. I just know that when I sit in the course tonight, I'll be staring hard at the detective teaching it, and think: DIE, DIE, DIE!!! It's really awful to think that, since he wasn't the one who gave me the ticket, and I was in the wrong by speeding. Nonetheless, bitterness and self-pity usually reigns, so "DIE, DIE, DIE" thoughts it shall be.

Wish me luck.