Stupid Valentine's Day
If someone were to prophesize to me that 'In five years, you'll be with the love of your live, living happily ever after', I'd be enjoying my life the way it is now.
I'm single, have my dog, have my house, and am secure in my job. My relatives live far enough away that I'm not bogged down by the family drama, yet we can get on the phone at any time to reconnect. I have friends to do stuff with when I need company, but no one to smother me when I want to do my things (rollerblading, biking, reading online fiction, or just hanging out with my dog).
Deep down, I know I'm a relationship kinda guy, but I won't get into one just to be in a relationship. I'm just waiting for the right guy to get into one. Until then, the single life is fine.
It's only around the holidays, with the upcoming Hallmark created abomination called 'Valentines Day' that I start feeling like crap. Lot's of thoughts go through my head, like:
- Am I going to be alone forever?
- I'm getting older as every day goes by...
- eHarmony & Chemistry ads on TV continually point out that everyone else has found their soulmates except for losers like me.
- Who's going to drive me to the emergency room if I have a heart attack?
- Who's going to let me know when I have a little food stuck on the side of my mouth and can't feel it?
- What am I going to do on Valentines day? Hide at home and go out with single friends pretending we aren't bitter? Or go out and make of point of being single & proud?
- Why are my Ex & I talking more on the phone together? Are we trying to latch onto something in the past, remembering the positive things and ignoring why we split up in the first place?
I hate doing the bitter/angry thing, but it seems to come out around a holiday like this.
Stupid Valentine's Day
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