Time to let him go?

[The_Silence]

So, I've liked this guy ever since last year. I told him I had feelings for him, and his response wasnt exactly clear, or at least not to me. So as a result I still have this lingering(and kind of strong) crush on him. Its kind of hard to move on when he is constantly on my mind. Everytime I get around him or think about him, I get the most irrational thoughts and as a result I can get kind of moody from time to time. Ive been thinking about asking him what did his answer exactly mean. But Ive been kind of timid about aproaching him about that particular subject. If you have any helpful suggestions, this is an excellent time to hand them out

 

 

thanks for taking the time out of your day to hear me whine.

[Graeme]

Hi

 

From what you've said, he's had a year to indicate if the feelings are mutual. Since he doesn't appear to have done so, I think you have to work at letting him go, at least as a crush. Definitely keep him as a friend, but you need to move on.

 

I'll say now that it is possible that he didn't really understand what you said when you told him you had feelings for him. I don't know how clear you were. If you were clear, then I think you have to accept that he hasn't reciprocated. If you may not have been clear, then I don't know. You seem to have a reason not to approach him again on the subject. If you don't feel you can, then you have to either be clear or move on. Staying in limbo isn't going to help you

 

Good luck!

[Tiger]

I agree with Graeme for the most part. However, sometimes there are mixed signals. Some guys will say one thing one day and something else the next. It's like some men are incapable of deciding what they want, which is really sad to be honest. There are a lot of people who might say that you should just make up their minds. If I were you I would just ask him. You may end up being rejected; you might not. However, if you just keep it to yourself, you won't know one way or the other. Take a risk. You may get burned or you may end up with a boyfriend. Either way you can finally move forward.

[DuffManBurns]

To be honest, I'm the Streisand of not letting people go, heh, so I understand your plight, there. But I'mma be honest, cause it does you no good to hear lies, right?

 

If this dude hasn't given you the time uh day (romantically, anyway) in the year since you told him you liked him... Yeah, that's as good as him saying, "Nope. Move along, champ." I don't really see what reminding him of the situation's gonna accomplish--beyond him actually saying, "Nope. Move along, champ" or somethin'--but if it's something you feel you need to do, rawk on. Either way, yeah, I do agree with the populace that it's time to move on the next disappointment.

 

And, hell, if for some reason he actually decides to give it a shot with you, boys that indecisive don't tend to make particularly spifftacular boyfriends. And if he's your age, he ain't likely to become more sure of himself and his feelings anytime soon. You'd really be better off giving it el try with someone who's absolutely sure he wants to give it a shot with you.

 

...Course, I'm basing this all on my (admittedly) limited experience, and perhaps it'll all work out dandily for you, heh. Best of luck, homie.

Edited September 21, 2008 by DuffManBurns

[AFriendlyFace]

Hi

 

From what you've said, he's had a year to indicate if the feelings are mutual. Since he doesn't appear to have done so, I think you have to work at letting him go, at least as a crush. Definitely keep him as a friend, but you need to move on.

 

I'll say now that it is possible that he didn't really understand what you said when you told him you had feelings for him. I don't know how clear you were. If you were clear, then I think you have to accept that he hasn't reciprocated. If you may not have been clear, then I don't know. You seem to have a reason not to approach him again on the subject. If you don't feel you can, then you have to either be clear or move on. Staying in limbo isn't going to help you

 

Good luck!

Good advice here.

 

I agree with Graeme for the most part. However, sometimes there are mixed signals. Some guys will say one thing one day and something else the next. It's like some men are incapable of deciding what they want, which is really sad to be honest. There are a lot of people who might say that you should just make up their minds. If I were you I would just ask him. You may end up being rejected; you might not. However, if you just keep it to yourself, you won't know one way or the other. Take a risk. You may get burned or you may end up with a boyfriend. Either way you can finally move forward.

And perhaps the best advice of all.

 

Ideally, I think perhaps you should move along. However, if you feel unable then it may indeed be time to confront him and be forward and find out once and for all one way or the other.

[hh5]

No matter what happens (BF or no BF)

Always be a friend to him and tell him that.

He maybe afraid to lose you as a friend if he says no to BF.

Remember we're a minority and we need as much support from each other.