rknapp Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 i know you guys are trying to help.. but some people here doesn't have to use those type of tones.. lol but.. thanks for the comments Actually yes, we do. This sort of thing is very serious and if it goes in any undesired direction you would be labeled as a child molester or a sex offender, even if you really are neither of those. John and I first realized we liked each other as more than friends when he was a minor, and we chose to wait until he was an adult (18) before making any sort of public announcement of that (on GA). We didn't even meet face to face until several months after that. I know of a guy who fell in love with another man was A LOT younger than he, well into the minor years, and they did not doing anything until the younger man was 18+. It's a lot safer that way. Mark is right, sometimes you need a slap in the face to get back into reality. We're not saying you can't have Dave, we're saying you need to be very cautious, in order to protect your own future. You don't want it to be a state correctional facility. 1
Mystic4zn Posted June 2, 2009 Author Posted June 2, 2009 Thanks love, But only prob is.. i sometimes have doubts... i swear i need to buy a new gaydar -.- mine really sucks
Benji Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 (edited) Thanks love, But only prob is.. i sometimes have doubts... i swear i need to buy a new gaydar -.- mine really sucks You have let infatuation rule over reality and your brain here, first of you are not sure the 'kid' is even gay, so why try to build on a fantasy later when he is of age? Second your lust is in a very dangerous area, pedophile; an adult who is sexually attracted to young children. You don't see him as a child but he is in fact a child, you may not think so because he is 14 and your 18, and you don't see the age difference. There lies your problem, especially if when you become say 22 and the now 18 year old kid doesn't do it for you anymore, and you look to find another kid for your fascination who is under the legal age of consent. Your constant queries in this site on this subject lead me to believe that you are wavering and seeking advice in your struggle, if this is fact, may I strongly suggest that you seek some counseling to deter your obsession. Frankly, no one wants to see your picture plastered on the news or a kid on a milk carton. If you think I came on too strong, look at the other comments here, look at your post, and then look at your life. Edited June 2, 2009 by Benji
Mystic4zn Posted June 2, 2009 Author Posted June 2, 2009 where an when did i say anything about having sex.... does a relationship have to involve sex?.... in my opinion... no... i know you guys are giving my warning about the system.. i understand it... it's ILLEGAL (he is) and im LEGAL etc etc etc pedophile?... well if you guys think that way.. well there's really nothing i can do not to convince you guys im not.. however, I know im 18, and that should be pretty old and 4 years difference is my boundaries above or below. even if im 50... 4 years would be probz my range... physically yes he's, athlete and all, but if he doesn't feel the same way i won't bug them. It happened to me when i was his age... had an attraction to someone my grade, didn't feel the same way, i left him alone. we are okay friends right now. Only thing i don't want happening is when someone knows what/who i am... changes their attitude, two faced at me... i hate that, been there 2 many times.. i mean i guess that's how ... 'we' are cursed... at least i am.. but either way yes im going to Uni/college, it's not like i won't talk to him anymore, a couple hi's and how are you would be kool. im sure there's a few guys or girls, in your life has been like that, and in the end they might not have been who you think they are, then maybe you left them alone, after you told them how you felt and they didn't feel the same way.
Benji Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 where an when did i say anything about having sex....does a relationship have to involve sex?.... in my opinion... no... i know you guys are giving my warning about the system.. i understand it... it's ILLEGAL (he is) and im LEGAL etc etc etc pedophile?... well if you guys think that way.. well there's really nothing i can do not to convince you guys im not.. however, I know im 18, and that should be pretty old and 4 years difference is my boundaries above or below. even if im 50... 4 years would be probz my range... physically yes he's, athlete and all, but if he doesn't feel the same way i won't bug them. It happened to me when i was his age... had an attraction to someone my grade, didn't feel the same way, i left him alone. we are okay friends right now. Only thing i don't want happening is when someone knows what/who i am... changes their attitude, two faced at me... i hate that, been there 2 many times.. i mean i guess that's how ... 'we' are cursed... at least i am.. but either way yes im going to Uni/college, it's not like i won't talk to him anymore, a couple hi's and how are you would be kool. im sure there's a few guys or girls, in your life has been like that, and in the end they might not have been who you think they are, then maybe you left them alone, after you told them how you felt and they didn't feel the same way. .......I never mentioned sex, as a matter of fact neither did you, until now! You say; "It happened to me when i was his age." Not sure what happened, you don't say here. You further say; 'i mean i guess that's how ... 'we' are cursed... at least i am.." Not sure what your curse is, but I took a guess earlier at your curse. Far from condemning you, I kinda of applaud you in your seekness in this forum for answers, far better then to read about in the papers. Question is what are you going to do? You have opened yourself up to us on your 'curse' to act upon it would be nothing but terrible consequences for you and your 'attraction'. If you took the time to post your concerns in here, maybe you already know it is wrong and you are seeking answers and hope to your dilemma.
Mark Arbour Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 , I kinda of applaud you in your seekness in this forum for answers, Seekness?
Tarin Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 .......I never mentioned sex, as a matter of fact neither did you, until now! You say; "It happened to me when i was his age." Not sure what happened, you don't say here. You further say; 'i mean i guess that's how ... 'we' are cursed... at least i am.." Not sure what your curse is, but I took a guess earlier at your curse. Far from condemning you, I kinda of applaud you in your seekness in this forum for answers, far better then to read about in the papers. Question is what are you going to do? You have opened yourself up to us on your 'curse' to act upon it would be nothing but terrible consequences for you and your 'attraction'. If you took the time to post your concerns in here, maybe you already know it is wrong and you are seeking answers and hope to your dilemma. Okay, first of all he said he's not a paedophile. Second of all that word doesn't even apply in this situation. 14 is not a little kid, depending on his development he may be a mid or even late teen. Just because he one time is infatuated with someone a little "too young" doesn't mean he is consistantly attracted to "young children." A four year gap cerainly isn't terrible anyway, as long as he knows when to act and when not to act on his feelings. I would understand your concern if he said "Dave is 8" instead of year 8, but come on. I'm sorry Benji, I don't mean to rant on you, I just hate how people sometimes jump to conclusions without considering the other person's situation or feelings.
Mark Arbour Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 Okay, first of all he said he's not a paedophile. Second of all that word doesn't even apply in this situation. 14 is not a little kid, depending on his development he may be a mid or even late teen.Just because he one time is infatuated with someone a little "too young" doesn't mean he is consistantly attracted to "young children." A four year gap cerainly isn't terrible anyway, as long as he knows when to act and when not to act on his feelings. I would understand your concern if he said "Dave is 8" instead of year 8, but come on. I'm sorry Benji, I don't mean to rant on you, I just hate how people sometimes jump to conclusions without considering the other person's situation or feelings. You mean it's time to stop piling on Mystic? That perhaps we made our point and the guy got it? Or he didn't, but regardless, now it's just annoying nagging? Makes sense to me.
Tarin Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 You mean it's time to stop piling on Mystic? That perhaps we made our point and the guy got it? Or he didn't, but regardless, now it's just annoying nagging? Makes sense to me. Uh, yeah. Pretty much. Now why didn't I say it like that? Thanks Mark!
Mystic4zn Posted June 3, 2009 Author Posted June 3, 2009 curse meaning... the way people reaction to the situation... and they change since you told them who or what you are...
C James Posted June 3, 2009 Posted June 3, 2009 Guys, Sorry, but I'm closing this thread. Discussing whether a relationship between a below-age-of-consent minor and an adult are okay is not appropriate (below age of consent means exactly that) for this board.
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