Proposed Chat Guidelines.

[Aeroplane]

Proposed by me only, nobody is (yet?) supporting me in this.

 

 

Guidelines for New Users

 

1: Be aware that there is a clique in chat. We are an established community and we have mostly known each other for a long time and so we will support each other - against you.

 

2: Despite 1, we are generally friendly and approachable.

 

3: Be nice, polite, and you'll get along with enough of us just fine. Eventually, you'll become a seasoned member and can take more liberties.

: This point includes talking about established members behind their back. Do not do it. Especially if an member takes you into their confidence about some issue.

: Trying to turn established members against each other is also frowned upon and will not work. It will end in a big argument with the result being: You ejected from chat - for as long as the mods deem necessary.

 

4: Don't expect to be liked immediately unless you are truly special. Give it some time and you will become a respected regular of chat.

 

 

Guidelines for Established Users

 

1: Please try to keep any personal disputes with new/established members personal, not public. Try not to publically involve other established users in your personal issue with another member. This causes big arguments and pisses off the admins and mods.

 

2: Be welcoming and friendly to new users - you were once a new user too. Bear in mind that a new user may be intimidated by the existing clique and probably wont fit in right away. Give them time before deciding you don't like them.

 

3: If you do not like a new user, the chat has an ignore button - use it if you cannot resist the temptation to respond to any baiting. Responding to baiting starts big arguments and pisses everyone off.

 

4: If you feel that enough is enough, and a user has outstayed their welcome, converse amongst yourselves to decide if there is a consensus. Try not to lose your temper about any ongoing issue and instead refer to point 3.

: If you confer and decide you are justified in wanting removal of a user from chat - try to attract the attention of a mod already in chat before you send any written complaint to an admin. This allows any issue to be dealt with informally and will usually have no consequences for the chat room. If you complain to an admin you risk the room being closed for everyone while the issue is resolved.

 

 

 

 

 

I have proposed these as an initiative towards self regulation within the chat room. We seem to have issues specifically in dealing with disputes, and our current method.. sniping at each other until a big argument happens.. is not good for anyone.

 

If anyone has anything to add, or wishes to propose changes to what I've thought of please feel free to contribute. We are a community self-selecting towards intellectual people.. We should not have to have fights lasting months in the chat room to resolve our difficulties - we are better than that.

 

Edit to add: also please note that this is not directed at anyone, nor is it specifically aimed at anyone involved in the current dispute. It was inspired by the current dispute and a critical analysis of the problems we currently have.

Edited February 11, 2010 by Pasta and Cheese

[Mark Arbour]

Proposed by me only, nobody is (yet?) supporting me in this.

 

 

Guidelines for New Users

 

1: Be aware that there is a clique in chat. We are an established community and we have mostly known each other for a long time and so we will support each other - against you.

 

2: Despite 1, we are generally friendly and approachable.

 

3: Be nice, polite, and you'll get along with enough of us just fine. Eventually, you'll become a seasoned member and can take more liberties.

: This point includes talking about established members behind their back. Do not do it. Especially if an member takes you into their confidence about some issue.

: Trying to turn established members against each other is also frowned upon and will not work. It will end in a big argument with the result being: You ejected from chat - for as long as the mods deem necessary.

 

4: Don't expect to be liked immediately unless you are truly special. Give it some time and you will become a respected regular of chat.

 

 

Guidelines for Established Users

 

1: Please try to keep any personal disputes with new/established members personal, not public. Try not to publically involve other established users in your personal issue with another member. This causes big arguments and pisses off the admins and mods.

 

2: Be welcoming and friendly to new users - you were once a new user too. Bear in mind that a new user may be intimidated by the existing clique and probably wont fit in right away. Give them time before deciding you don't like them.

 

3: If you do not like a new user, the chat has an ignore button - use it if you cannot resist the temptation to respond to any baiting. Responding to baiting starts big arguments and pisses everyone off.

 

4: If you feel that enough is enough, and a user has outstayed their welcome, converse amongst yourselves to decide if there is a consensus. Try not to lose your temper about any ongoing issue and instead refer to point 3.

: If you confer and decide you are justified in wanting removal of a user from chat - try to attract the attention of a mod already in chat before you send any written complaint to an admin. This allows any issue to be dealt with informally and will usually have no consequences for the chat room. If you complain to an admin you risk the room being closed for everyone while the issue is resolved.

 

 

 

 

 

I have proposed these as an initiative towards self regulation within the chat room. We seem to have issues specifically in dealing with disputes, and our current method.. sniping at each other until a big argument happens.. is not good for anyone.

 

If anyone has anything to add, or wishes to propose changes to what I've thought of please feel free to contribute. We are a community self-selecting towards intellectual people.. We should not have to have fights lasting months in the chat room to resolve our difficulties - we are better than that.

 

Edit to add: also please note that this is not directed at anyone, nor is it specifically aimed at anyone involved in the current dispute. It was inspired by the current dispute and a critical analysis of the problems we currently have.

 

I probably shouldn't jump in here, but I'm going to. I know you, and I like you, but when I read this post, it doesn't sound like you. Here's what I hear:

 

1. We are a tight group. Chat is ours. If you're not one of us, you have to suck up to us before we will let you in. Then you can be part of our club.

 

2. We will tolerate you, unless you annoy us, in which case we will simply shun you.

 

3. If you get into an argument with one of us, you get into an argument with all of us. We will gang up on you and beat you up.

 

4. We won't like you at first. You have to prove yourself. We may not be nice. Deal with it and maybe you can be part of our club. Don't, and we'll kick your ass.

 

5. If there aren't any new people to pick on, we'll fight amongst ourselves. We're a contentious bunch.

 

I wonder how many of our members put up with just this kind of treatment when they were in high school? Or beyond? Shunned and picked on. That's not what this place is supposed to be about.

 

It is just wrong.

[MikeL]

Rob, thanks for taking the initiative in outlining rules for chat. Everything you have seems reasonable to me. I do think there is one word you might consider changing:

 

1: Please try to keep any personal disputes with new/established members personal private, not public.

[Aeroplane]

I probably shouldn't jump in here, but I'm going to. I know you, and I like you, but when I read this post, it doesn't sound like you. Here's what I hear:

 

1. We are a tight group. Chat is ours. If you're not one of us, you have to suck up to us before we will let you in. Then you can be part of our club.

 

2. We will tolerate you, unless you annoy us, in which case we will simply shun you.

 

3. If you get into an argument with one of us, you get into an argument with all of us. We will gang up on you and beat you up.

 

4. We won't like you at first. You have to prove yourself. We may not be nice. Deal with it and maybe you can be part of our club. Don't, and we'll kick your ass.

 

5. If there aren't any new people to pick on, we'll fight amongst ourselves. We're a contentious bunch.

 

I wonder how many of our members put up with just this kind of treatment when they were in high school? Or beyond? Shunned and picked on. That's not what this place is supposed to be about.

 

It is just wrong.

Youre right, that mostly IS how I view chat, totally bar your point 5.

 

We are a tight knit group, and it is up to the new users to prove themselves. They should have no difficulties if they generally 'fit in'. We do adapt to different people's personalities, though.

 

I dont think new users should 'suck up', just show that they are people we can get on with. I dont want people sucking up to me, I want to talk to people I like.

I dont ask for any 'power' over new users, but I get it through life. It is life that your friends will side with you. I tried to account for that in my proposed guidelines - people should give new users a chance, and not side with their friends before deciding on someone.

 

 

 

Rob, thanks for taking the initiative in outlining rules for chat. Everything you have seems reasonable to me. I do think there is one word you might consider changing:

 

1: Please try to keep any personal disputes with new/established members personal private, not public.

 

Yep, thats a fair alteration. . As long as a dispute doesnt involve the whole room Im happy.

Edited February 11, 2010 by Pasta and Cheese

[Mark Arbour]

it is up to the new users to prove themselves.

 

Wow. I thought chat was supposed to be this friendly place everyone could go, not the exclusive domain of some. But I'm uncomfortable having this discussion with you because I respect that you have been honest about what it is and how you see it, even though I disagree with you.

[shadowgod]

why not just say "Come, chat & maybe we will like you"?

 

I understand what you are trying to do, unfortunately it isn't very welcoming. Not only is it not welcoming to new members, it is not welcoming to existing members who do not use chat regularly. These rules can not be instituted uniformly, anyone enforcing them would have to deliniate who is a "regular" and who is not. Then at what point does a member become a regular? Is it when all regulars like them, or just a select group? If so, who decides that group?

 

Community rules and standards are already in place. Simply put, just treat everyone with respect. No sniping or back biting is wanted nor needed.

[Aeroplane]

Wow. I thought chat was supposed to be this friendly place everyone could go, not the exclusive domain of some. But I'm uncomfortable having this discussion with you because I respect that you have been honest about what it is and how you see it, even though I disagree with you.

 

It is a friendly place. BUT everyone reserves the right to like/dislike any individual. A big theme of my proposal was to give every user a chance and to not spread your own personal issues with any user to any other user(s). Everyone should be free to make up their own mind about whether or not to like/dislike a user.

 

I understand that you are uncomfortable, though. If you want to PM me about it, would that alleviate some discomfort?

[Aeroplane]

why not just say "Come, chat & maybe we will like you"?

 

I understand what you are trying to do, unfortunately it isn't very welcoming. Not only is it not welcoming to new members, it is not welcoming to existing members who do not use chat regularly. These rules can not be instituted uniformly, anyone enforcing them would have to deliniate who is a "regular" and who is not. Then at what point does a member become a regular? Is it when all regulars like them, or just a select group? If so, who decides that group?

 

Community rules and standards are already in place. Simply put, just treat everyone with respect. No sniping or back biting is wanted nor needed.

 

I absolutely agree - treat everyone with respect is a key theme, but the community rules and standards havent been working - chat is closed currently. These aren't rules, but an idea of how everyone in chat can behave to make everything better for everyone.

 

It may not be welcoming, but I am setting out reality as I see it. Cliques are everywhere.. in life, in GA, and people need to be aware of that. It doesnt mean that we are unwelcoming, just that we do not like disruption in the form of arguments lasting months.

[Arpeggio]

I agree, the chat has a tight knit of friends, all who defend each other at the slightest, but it never seems to be with each other, more with newbies who don't understand how close we are.

 

I have some ideas but I wouldnt trust myself to post some right now because Im sleepy. XD

 

I wonder how many of our members put up with just this kind of treatment when they were in high school? Or beyond? Shunned and picked on. That's not what this place is supposed to be about.

 

Mark, Rob is not trying to come off the way he seems to be. A lot of the chat regulars have been talking and we want to be able to set guidelines for OURselves more so than the newbies, learning from our mistakes, and trying to keep from dragging a mod in every day. Self moderation really

Edited February 11, 2010 by Arpeggio

[shadowgod]

Explain to me how, if the community rules and standards are being ignored, A specific set of chat guidelines are going to solve the problem?

 

You are indeed right however, members could not follow the site rules. One of the prescribed consequences for not doing so is the removal of privileges. Maybe now that we are aware that a service can, and will, be removed if it is causing a disruption; we will be more observant of what is and is not appropriate.

 

also to clearly spell out what that is:

 

Disruptive activity includes, but is not limited to:

• (1) posts that disrupt the topic of conversation or steer the discussion away from the focus of the topic,
• (2) multiple posting of the same post,
• (3) posting completely off topic messages,
• (4) messages constantly posted in the wrong forum,
• (5) messages posted in all-caps,
• (6) harassment of any member,
• (7) deliberate misrepresentation of another person's position,
• (8) compromising the privacy of any member,
• (9) inappropriate behavior towards any minor, and
• (10) any other behavior that in the view of GA management is disruptive of the site or poses a danger to any member or author.

 

Pretty simple, and they can be applied equally to everyone, without the added headache of who is a chat "regular" and who is not.

[Aeroplane]

Explain to me how, if the community rules and standards are being ignored, A specific set of chat guidelines are going to solve the problem?

 

You are indeed right however, members could not follow the site rules. One of the prescribed consequences for not doing so is the removal of privileges. Maybe now that we are aware that a service can, and will, be removed if it is causing a disruption; we will be more observant of what is and is not appropriate.

 

Youre right, perhaps this will not work at all.

 

As a member interested in chat being peaceful and fun, though, I have to try to make things better and that is what I am trying to do through this thread. I dont expect anything will change overnight as a result of this thread, but I want to contribute to try and make chat a better place for the users and less of a 'time liability' for the admins/mods. So this is my contribution.

Edited February 11, 2010 by Pasta and Cheese

[zland666]

Hmmm I havent been here to long and I was in the chat, seems friendly but I get accounts deleted to easy so I stay out and just write stories and read the stories from other authors in efiction. I have no intent of joing a "Group" just here to meet new people and make new friends.

[Mark Arbour]

Youre right, perhaps this will not work at all.

 

As a member interested in chat being peaceful and fun, though, I have to try to make things better and that is what I am trying to do through this thread. I dont expect anything will change overnight as a result of this thread, but I want to contribute to try and make chat a better place for the users and less of a 'time liability' for the admins/mods. So this is my contribution.

 

I think it is laudable that you started the discussion. Perhaps a clearing of the air, and an effort to find real solutions (which will rely on member cooperation, not management coercion) will ultimately be successful.

[JamesSavik]

Suggested Amendment: If you are being a flaming asshole, we reserve the right to hunt you down and give you a monster truck wedgie.

 

[shadowgod]

Youre right, perhaps this will not work at all.

 

As a member interested in chat being peaceful and fun, though, I have to try to make things better and that is what I am trying to do through this thread. I dont expect anything will change overnight as a result of this thread, but I want to contribute to try and make chat a better place for the users and less of a 'time liability' for the admins/mods. So this is my contribution.

 

Then make chat peaceful and fun through your actions. Not through some arbitrary set of guidelines that create two separate classes of chat participants. Like I said I don't find fault with your want to create guidelines. I find fault with the "Newbies" vs "Regulars" approach. If you can come up with a set of guidelines that can unilaterally cover all members I am all for it.

 

However, I do believe we have a set of those already. But maybe we need to find a way to make them more clearly visible to people entering chat.

[Lugh]

New Chat Rules

Lugh's Version

1. Be aware that there are cliques in chat.
   
2. Dissenters shall be bitten.
   
3. Noobies must register with their team captian as soon as possible: cut to Linxe; uncut & female to Lugh.
   
4. When there are no mods, Lugh is in charge.
   
5. When there is no Lugh chaos reigns.
   

[Mark Arbour]

Then make chat peaceful and fun through your actions. Not through some arbitrary set of guidelines that create two separate classes of chat participants. Like I said I don't find fault with your want to create guidelines. I find fault with the "Newbies" vs "Regulars" approach. If you can come up with a set of guidelines that can unilaterally cover all members I am all for it.

 

However, I do believe we have a set of those already. But maybe we need to find a way to make them more clearly visible to people entering chat.

 

 

Well put Steve.

 

New Chat Rules

Lugh's Version

1. Be aware that there are cliques in chat.
2. Dissenters shall be bitten.
3. Noobies must register with their team captian as soon as possible: cut to Linxe; uncut & female to Lugh.
4. When there are no mods, Lugh is in charge.
5. When there is no Lugh chaos reigns.

 

The only reason I go into chat is to hit on you anyway.

[Lugh]

I know... shame you don't come by more often so you I can tell you to go to hell more often... anyway... you didn't say if you liked my rules or not... you had a lot to say about Rob's rules... I think you like him better.

[Mark M]

coercion one of the leadership powers....and all it inspires is resentment and dissent.

 

Myself i've enjoyed chat and only joked around. Had a few political arguments but other then that i like it. I'm relitivly old now...in G.A as i have been around for a few....months and agreed i probably am very much "in or Acceptable" to the click. Frankly by some i'm called the Crazy Candian XD

 

 

Either way i do hate the fact that some people won't join in chat because of other's. It's sad but i won't lie if someone was in there i didn't want to talk to i wouldn't go in. I have yet to run into a joining homophob who randomly shows up on the chat just to beak us all.

 

 

Frankly Chat will never be Moderated. The current mods like to joke around alot with there powers too, not that it isn't funny. Sometimes though people can't tell what could be a Possible serious thing, to a Joke. (Not meaning to get on the mod's tail) but Telling people what they can and can't say isn't always negotiable. Some say there are "Youngin's" in the room IE: Under the Majority age. Frankly if your on this site at all it should be 18+ or parental supervision should be done. If it's not.....well....it's the real world here, why dumb it down and have these youngin's be uneducated?

 

Were here to help troubled teens and sometime Flat out is the way to do it. Beating around the bush and making it appropirate (especially though's not Writers or English anythings.) can make it confusing instead.

 

 

Either way I say Re-open Chat! I was gona go in there today. Apperantly not. Anyway Everyone should be welcome.

 

P.S Rooms can be created in the Chat.....for some reason no1 ever uses them. (that way you can even password the room and P.M to though's members you WANT to talk to...thus ignoring the ones you don't.) Sadly this is a type of exclusion which could also end badly.

 

This is my opinion.

[Gregoire]

Then make chat peaceful and fun through your actions. Not through some arbitrary set of guidelines that create two separate classes of chat participants. Like I said I don't find fault with your want to create guidelines. I find fault with the "Newbies" vs "Regulars" approach. If you can come up with a set of guidelines that can unilaterally cover all members I am all for it.

 

However, I do believe we have a set of those already. But maybe we need to find a way to make them more clearly visible to people entering chat.

 

I'm not even a regular, I'm a guest star, and I have to say I do well enough for myself. There are cliques and I don't pretend to be in all of them, but I do try to be included. My desire for inclusion combined with my general awesomeness makes it fun. And I've been known to shut down a newbie or two or completely exclude someone, and I'm not proud of it, but I've been shut down, myself. Basically, my addition to the rules is:

 

"Don't be a bitch."

[Amelia]

Females to Lugh? I don't know if I have sucked up enough to you in your forum for you to be my Captain yet...

 

I just wanted to say that I have been dropping into chat a few times a week for a little over a month now. Besides some teasing from Lugh (which I am fairly sure is all in good fun), I have found it to be a welcoming place despite my newbie status. I can't imagine what has gone on today (and I am curbing my overwhelming and unhealthy desire to beg for details), but I have enjoyed my discussions to date and have yet to have a bad experience.

[Gregoire]

Also, when Lugh is away...I am the usurper king of the chat. This has been established in chat, I just thought I would publish it.

 

So, uh, I can be your captain, too.

[Mark M]

Also, when Lugh is away...I am the usurper king of the chat. This has been established in chat, I just thought I would publish it.

 

So, uh, I can be your captain, too.

 

 

I think not MR. GREG! Even though your super hot u cannot usurpe Lugh! You can have linxes position (Thus being in my group )

[Mark Arbour]

I know... shame you don't come by more often so you I can tell you to go to hell more often... anyway... you didn't say if you liked my rules or not... you had a lot to say about Rob's rules... I think you like him better.

 

I don't like rules at all. I'm such an anarchist.

[Lugh]

Some say there are "Youngin's" in the room IE: Under the Majority age. Frankly if your on this site at all it should be 18+ or parental supervision should be done. If it's not.....well....it's the real world here, why dumb it down and have these youngin's be uneducated?

 

 

To be quite honest Mark M, because sometimes we talk about very adult gay sexual topics in there that young queerlings (those in the 13-16 age group) really do not need to know about and older queerlings (16-17) don't need much info on unless they ask specific questions. I will not get specific here but if you want more info PM me.