Reality and Fiction

[W_L]

It is so hard to get out of the work mindset and write or read a story; play a video game, or watch a movie for me anymore.

 

The higher I climb the corporate ladder, the further removed I feel from other things in my life. 

 

In the last few weeks

, I probably spent only 2 hours on any creative outlets or interactive activity. I watch TV but zone out the details. I even start watching reality TV, which I detest. 

 

I know it is considered a mental issue if you are detatched from reality, but what if you are detatched from fiction.

 

Anyone else feels like this

 

 

 

 

[Cia]

Yes. And it really, really makes me cranky. While a lot of my 'duties' each day involves reading, both for the site and beta/editing, if I don't get time to read fiction on a regular basis because of life simply being too busy, I get very, very frazzled. I find watching TV to take far more focus than reading, oddly enough, so it's my go to 'thing' whenever I have downtime. I even give up sleep for it, such as last night when I read from 10 PM to midnight, even though I was back up at 4 AM to start my day. I'll sleep when I'm dead--I can't read.

[Zombie]

It is so hard to get out of the work mindset and write or read a story; play a video game, or watch a movie for me anymore.

 

The higher I climb the corporate ladder, the further removed I feel from other things in my life. 

 

In the last few weeks

, I probably spent only 2 hours on any creative outlets or interactive activity. I watch TV but zone out the details. I even start watching reality TV, which I detest. 

 

I know it is considered a mental issue if you are detatched from reality, but what if you are detatched from fiction.

 

Anyone else feels like this

 

R.I.P. W_L

He was a good worker and met all his performance targets

 

 

 

This can be you - if you want it

 

[pmdacey]

Don't watch TV. We got rid of it 10 years ago and don't miss it. Fortunately we are able to leave work there at the end of the day. Since a big part of our income derives from my husband's art we have to be engaged in creative activity a lot, sometimes even when we are not in the mood. It does mean it can be hard for me to have time to write. I am learning to say no to some of the outside obligations. I am also learning to make my writing my escape and relaxation. We don't define ourselves by our day jobs. He is an artist that just happens to also work for a parking company and I am a writer that just happens to work in commercial printing.

 

I just had this discussion with my boss (who is awesome and was the one that officiated at our wedding) because she was feeling depressed about work.

[Bill W]

Life is short, so you have to take time to smell the roses or do the things you enjoy.  If not, life probably isn't worth living and it will be over before you know it.  Unfortunately, most businesses feel that their upper echilon should make work their primary focus and put it above all else, as well as those whose primary focus is on the monetary rewards they'll reap, but there's more to life than work.  Save up the big bucks you're making now and then you'll be able to take a less demanding job later, so you can enjoy the benefits you have earned.  

[W_L]

I know I am workaholic; I have my problems stemming from a need to prove my ability and self-worth.

 

It's just recently gotten to a point where none of my usual outlets seem to get me out of the mindset. I am no longer in a relationship, I am working on several major projects at our firm, and my boss is preparing me for a promotion to Exec at the ned of the year. I'd be one of the youngest finance execs in America, who did  not start a business.  When I feel like just slouching and slowing down on my work; I look around me and at what I handle. I've got the livelihoods of 500 people, 2000 contractors, and even more patients from third party insurers to look over.  My problems with existentialism and my needs to express my artistic and creative side comes after their needs.

 

I am not a Steve Jobs, nor a Mark Zuckerberg, I am not an inventor, so my job is more about building on what exists and expanding it. I do like to build and expand things. When I was a kid, my favorite games were Sim City 2000 and  Civilization II. I still play their modern equivalents today, but I just don't have time to really do those things anymore.

 

Sometimes, I just wish I could live a simpler life, writing stories that most people will never read, tending o a moderately sized self sufficient farm, and living my life with someone that can speak volumes to me with just a touch, a laugh, or a smile. That's what I want in the end, but I feel like even my dreams are becoming compromised as I push forward on my career.

 

I get what you guys are saying, but I can't just drop my responsibilities.

[Irritable1]

So much to say.

 

For some reason I was actually thinking of you the other day W-L and thinking that you sound like someone who is questing and working so much and still not really being challenged sufficiently. And I was wondering if maybe the solution is not less work but more? My first idea was just the straightforward IRS work that volunteers do at tax time, but that seems impossible given that you'll have deadlines at the same time. But could you tutor students working on finance or business degrees? Do you have the option of doing finance reviews for small businesses or minority businesses locally? Could you look over loan applications before small business owners take them in, maybe advise on strategy to make them more appealing to the lenders? 

 

And now that you mention working at an executive level--you're talking about locking yourself into roughly 30 years of the same kind of work. Which is fine, but the kind of dull unhappiness you describe really isn't sustainable for that long. At our company, the successful executives usually have long-term welfare projects that they're encouraged to nurture, and they're expected to at least give lip service to work-life balance--most have partners and families. One thing that struck me... are you out at work? Could you be the executive champion for a GLBT work organization? It would add a level of meaning to the responsibility you feel for your colleagues, and maybe it would feel more creative?

 

For me, when I'm too tired to be creative (nearly always) I'm not always too tired to learn something.  If you can't write, can you listen to classical music and study up on it?  I spent a couple of seasons doing that, reading random Dummies Guides to Opera etc. and it was really fun.  Music also doesn't burden you with the need to follow an explicit narrative, which I like when I'm tired.

 

Lastly, and forgive me if this sounds obnoxious, I do think a bit of perspective would be good. No one is really irreplaceable. If you were struck by lightning tomorrow they'd have to promote someone else, and that would be inefficient and it would make people's lives a bit worse in the short term, but it'd be ok. You don't owe it to your place of employment to be unhappy.

 

Hope you feel better.

[W_L]

So much to say.

 

For some reason I was actually thinking of yo

 

 

th. other day W-L and thinking that you sound like someone who is questing and working so much and still not really being challenged sufficiently. And I was wondering if maybe the solution is not less work but more? My first idea was just the straightforward IRS work that volunteers do at tax time, but that seems impossible given that you'll have deadlines at the same time. But could you tutor students working on finance or business degrees? Do you have the option of doing finance reviews for small businesses or minority businesses locally? Could you look over loan applications before small business owners take them in, maybe advise on strategy to make them more appealing to the lenders? 

 

And now that you mention working at an executive level--you're talking about locking yourself into roughly 30 years of the same kind of work. Which is fine, but the kind of dull unhappiness you describe really isn't sustainable for that long. At our company, the successful executives usually have long-term welfare projects that they're encouraged to nurture, and they're expected to at least give lip service to work-life balance--most have partners and families. One thing that struck me... are you out at work? Could you be the executive champion for a GLBT work organization? It would add a level of meaning to the responsibility you feel for your colleagues, and maybe it would feel more creative?

 

For me, when I'm too tired to be creative (nearly always) I'm not always too tired to learn something.  If you can't write, can you listen to classical music and study up on it?  I spent a couple of seasons doing that, reading random Dummies Guides to Opera etc. and it was really fun.  Music also doesn't burden you with the need to follow an explicit narrative, which I like when I'm tired.

 

Lastly, and forgive me if this sounds obnoxious, I do think a bit of perspective would be good. No one is really irreplaceable. If you were struck by lightning tomorrow they'd have to promote someone else, and that would be inefficient and it would make people's lives a bit worse in the short term, but it'd be ok. You don't owe it to your place of employment to be unhappy.

 

Hope you feel better.

Thanks for the suggestions, I am also an Enrolled Agent with the IRS and have a masters degree in taxation, which i rarely use outside of tax season. I majored in accounting for bachlors. I did at one point volunteer at a free tax clinic, but my work caught up to me.

 

As for work life balance, i think it is more of an ideal than reality. Finance and accounting unlike sales is a grind without a visible target. At our firm, ironically, I am the one helping to set the targets based on running estimates and projections against client volumes and potential expansion in new regions. Probably, my job should be split into three managers, but I am the guy at the center. Between account managers haggling to keep their goals flat or grow at a slower rate, an operations team arguing about fees and schedules with medical contractors (I am the referee in those battles), and contractors extorting me for money or else they won't complete their patient examination/reviews (Doctors can be vindicative too), plus everything else, I am just caught in a world wind of issues.

 

The world of American Health care is much more complicated than anyone truly understands and there's a lot of players that have parts in it, beyond just doctors and insurers.

Edited August 23, 2014 by W_L