IMAGINE Magazine Question for 6/15

[JeffsFort]

 

As I get older, I often look back at some of what I thought I was clear about when I was a kid and realize, maybe I wasn't seeing as clearly as I thought I was. This is especially true about some of the friendships I've had.

Now granted, my childhood may or may not be representative of a normal childhood of the late 70's and early 80's but I do know that many of my best friends of the time were absolutely more than just friendships. Crush is the term I feel fits best although thanks to a couple of older friends, I had a few fun activities that I really wanted to share with some of them because I saw them as more than just friends. I had no term for it back then but remember having a couple of friends that I simply couldn't get close enough to. But, were they just friendships with someone I was close enough to for that kind of "play" to be okay or, were they actually full on crushes? Either way, I got some pretty amazing memories and stories out of it all.

What about for you? Did you have a friend that looking back to it really was a crush? Did you think you had a crush that turned out to just be a close friendship? Did you even know the difference back then? 💜

[SilentandBroken]

There were a couple in school for me but I was in the closet the whole time 

[D.K. Daniels]

I had a few crushes in school, but they were mostly just platonic relationships from afar. During the summer, our family owned and vacationed in a mobile home on a holiday campsite in the south of Ireland. There was one boy I met when we were 12/13, and our bond was incredibly close, and it strengthened as the years went on. We only ever met during the summers, so there was always that yearning to see him again when the summer drew close. By the time I was 15ish, I was pretty sure I was in love, but I never acted on those feelings because I valued the friendship more, and was scared of creeping him out. Turns out a couple of years later he came out too, so things could have happened differently if I spoke up. He would have been my first boyfriend at the time, and though having a relationship could have been nice, my memories of a fond friendship outweighs any doubt of a missed opportunity. 

[SilentandBroken]

We really need a hug emoji 

[JeffsFort]

I shot myself in the foot with this question to be honest because there were quite a few over the years that I had to force myself not to openly drool over. But there is one really worth mentioning. The one I will bring up for this answer, I actually had a conversation with Comicality regarding because of his significance to a couple characters I based their personalities on. Let's call him Scott.

When I was in the 4th grade, I began to realize that I REALLY loved spending time with Scott. I knew him for a couple years prior but, we actually hung out from 4th grade through High School before losing touch one of the many times my parents split up and we changed schools.

It really became obvious to me when he talked me into playing baseball after school which is something I would never have done on my own. It was coached by our teacher who took the time to teach me how to hit, field, and even to throw so I'd stop embarrassing myself. Hehehe! Scott wasn't just cute, he was supportive (and cute), he was funny (and cute), and for some weird reason, he liked hanging out with me, of all people. LOL! (I did mention he was cute, right?) Things at home sucked most of the time but he was my escape when I could get away from it.

The day Comsie and I talked about was one of my favorite memories. Scott was on a youth football team when we were in 5th grade and I would make his practices when I could. In the beginning, running drills had him sore and exhausted and when we got back to his house this particular night, he collapsed face first on the couch without even changing. So, I of course gave him shit for hogging the couch, lifted his legs and sat down, dropping them in my lap. When he complained how much his feet hurt, I pulled off his sneakers and socks and very carefully rubbed his feet. It was an odd thing for a friend to just do but we didn't have many boundaries between us so, his only response was a few groans of relaxation before he started to doze off. I remember knowing he dozed off but not wanting the moment to end. His mother came into the living room and just smiled, whispered how cute we were and then wandered off into the kitchen. The physical contact, his tight uniform shorts, my absolute admiration for him...It was a strong crush that spanned a few years and even to this day, some of my favorite memories and imagined fantasies center around that friendship. 

I let him talk me into playing baseball in the beginning, wrestling in Jr. High, and in High School the swim team just so I could be near him! OMG the swim team...there was much horsing around in the showers and locker room for sure. LOL! 

Comsie told me there was a story in that experience but I've never been able to write it. I have no words to describe so much of what I was feeling back then or what it meant to me. That and some of what we shared was kinda private... 🫣 He actually made the comment that it was too bad he wasn't gay so we could do even more than we were doing. If only I had the courage to tell him... I bet he knew. ::sigh::

After the last time I moved, he and I talked on the phone occasionally. It was hard being limited to calls. He had started dating some girl from our school and I remember being both happy for him and jealous that she got to spend time with him and I couldn't anymore. The calls came less often before they stopped all together months later. I've never run into him again since but, he will always live rent free in my memories. If he ever finds this answer and reads it thinking it sounds familiar, I'll go ahead and give him a clue that it's our story I'm talking about: "Next time we run back to your house because you forgot your glove 'again', slow down so I can keep up, dork!" LOL!

[Page Scrawler]

My first "real" crush was my best friend in 5th and 6th grade. Strangely enough,  we have the same first name. Aside from that, we're basically opposites. He likes/liked sports, he has really skinny ribs that you can count, has blond hair, blue eyes, likes to laugh...he's really chatty with other people, etc.

I prefer books and movies, I have dark hair and green eyes, a heavyset frame, I'm usually pretty serious, and I prefer my own company, mostly. One thing that I learned early on, is that he's very ticklish. Like, to an absurd degree. I swear, I never set out to tickle him on purpose.

But, one day, after inviting him over to my house, I tried to give him a little shoulder rub because his muscles were sore from gym class. It left him gasping and convulsing on my bed like he was being tortured! Hahaha! Oops.

If we'd been older and wiser, it could have led to some amazing foreplay, and, although we did experiment a little, we went to different schools in the 7th grade. He lived on the opposite side of town, and being dependent on my helicopter parents for transport meant that house visits were very rare. The relationship pretty much died around the start of 8th grade, but I still remember the time we spent together fondly.