Cia

Okay, I did see the end coming in some ways, but then I've read the Dark Hunter books by Sherrilyn Kenyon. Your portrayal of a person locked in an image just waiting to be freed by/for sexual gratification is one she used in her very first book in that series. Plus the images were just too 'convenient' to not have some sort of paranormal twist. I have to say you certainly have a way of making a story entirely about sex but making the message be so much more. I loved it.

I really liked your story. You have set such an irreverent tone to a sensitive topic. Religion, it's views on homosexuality and the origins of the AIDS epidemic, not to mention the mental stability of those who ascribe to religion. For a story based on such a sad event with such a bizarre main character who ends up in a very pathetic state it made me smile and chuckle.

You showed how a person's mind can be the unwitting accomplice to an attacker. In the end, until we can face them both we remain vulnerable. Yet that never gets rid of the pain, it just makes it easier to bear. What I wonder about your story is why now? What really triggered that memory and was the ER doctor right and all the free time his mind had make it turn against him? I really liked this story, it kept me reading faster and faster until I finally got to find out was happening and what that steel door meant. Well done!

Well you will need to get over that! Your stories, what I've read of them, admittedly not as much as I'd like (darn GA Stories keeping me busy) are great! I hope you make the transfer over to the new system and start getting to know everyone. GA is a great place to get feedback, grow as a writer and also meet a ton of great online people! Welcome!!! Edited to add; *Good lords, how many times did I just use the word great? Note to self *use thesaurus* and less caffeine at this time of night!*

Hmm... the idea of a lost love haunting us by every glimpse we catch familiar places is one I toyed with. You did a great job with this idea and putting an interesting twist on the concept. It's funny how sensory our memories are, sights, sounds, and smells can all bring on those feelings that we used to have so vividly and paint a picture in our minds. Then, when we seek out those feelings deliberately it's never quite enough. I think that knowledge would be quite haunting.

I don't really understand poetry but what I seem to get from most of the things you write is a duality inherent in all people. You draw out the positive and negative aspects of a soul so eloquently. Thank you for continuing to share yours in all that you write.

What in interesting story. It's fragmented and yet it makes sense in a twisted way. The only thing I'm not quite sure on was Tig. I get the sense Tig did not like Catherine at all. Yet your ending line about 'the face of god split open with grief' and the towel falling to the ground seemed to belie that. All in all as I ended my read of this story I could only say one thing with any certainity; you certainly have the disjointed, tripped out and fried mental processes of a drunk tweaker down pat!

I really liked this story. While Chase's constant misgivings could have been a whiny turn off in the story for me you tread the fine line to expose his sense of worth (low) and his equal determination to ignore that as much as possible and simply enjoy what he is being given. The small glimpses you gave us of his life were awful, btw. You basically said he was a drug dealer that shared a bed with whoever wanted him in order to just get by and had been doing it for a long time. Since he's 19 that gives a very bad image to his life as a teen. It made the very things you highlighted the most, his self-esteem and his sense of fatalistic acceptance, make a lot of sense without having to go into the details. All in all, you wrote a very short story that somehow said so much more. Wonderful writing!

I found this story so sad. The character has such a low self-esteem and seems to know it and yet not care. He seemed to base his life around who he was back in high school and he never grew beyond that. That being said I did finish the story with a sense of optimism. The guy is broke and alone, his car is crapping out on him, his apartment is locked to him and yet all those things seemed to be in his life because he could not let go of this high school crush. You have to believe he went to the college close by, he moved back to the same hometown to work and live and all for what? To stay close to the memories of what could have been? Well, as Graeme said, now he knows and perhaps he can turn it all around, free from the ties that bound him all his life to his crush.

The story of Etral is one that had me in tears. The moment when he realizes that he loses both his love and an unborn child he did not know of was so poignant. A lesser man would have allowed his will to be suborned but Etral stood fast to his duty time and time again. I know he was bound by his oath to Ilarius but something eminently worthy inside of him allowed him to make that in the first place. That entire scene you wrote gave me chills. It was so momentous and solemn; full of pain and yet a moment of completion for Etral. Power is a heavy burden and he has borne his share of the responsibilities. I hope that you will continue with this story at some point and give him some of the rewards for holding true to his faith, his power, and his people.

Your beta is very very sorry. We all know I am usually way better than that. hee hee. Okay, so I love the bit of humor at the end. You know I think you could have ended this at a different part but I really do like the new ending you put on it. The story has moments of levity and relief from the drama interspersed with the climactic moments but you left it on a very 'up' point. Much better than after the baby comes and half of Zach's paintings become a mix of art and spit up I still see that in my mind when I read this story. I think you could easily write something for the next anthology that would continue this one considering the topic is "People are Strange". That could tie into seeing ghosts quite well and I am sure your readers would love to see you continue on with a story and develop the characters further. I'll start dinging you after this year is over. *Evil beta powers held at bay for the holidays*.

Woah Woah Woah Vic! Do not try to get me in trouble! I said nothing about him being 30 He's only 29, however facing this last year is almost as bad as facing 30 next year I think. : The age just keeps on coming And you can't kill me for saying that Linxe cause I'm 4 months older than you!!

If you need help when you come back Nephy, let me know. I can move things over without all the troubles everyone else is having. I can also move directly from e-fiction without losing the formatting so it really isn't any trouble. I should be done with the anthologies in the next few days, hopefully! Don't stress in the holiday season, there is enough of that to go around!!

I know you would rather we all ignore this but nope... I'm not gonna let that happen.

Reviews copied for Hollow Reality, as of 12-17-2010 Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Allerron Very disturbing story on several counts. Sad too. But, I've always maintained that literature is supposed to entertain, shock and/or make the reader think. On one level this story did entertain me, it gave me a brief glimpse into someone's pathetic life. It also had a bit of shock value to it and it certainly DID make me think. I'll probably be thinking on this one for a long time to come, reflecting on how losing one's own identity is perhaps the greatest sin in the world. I cannot even begin to express how impressed I am at this one, very deep and intense. KUDOS! Date: 06/15/2010 11:47 AM Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: taina1959 WOW! This was very, very good! Extremely cold but good. And to think that there are people out there that are just like that, who don't care about anything or anyone but themselves. Makes you think hard about our own lives. Date: 06/14/2010 03:57 PM Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Nephylim Bloody hell. Way to go to shock in the first chapter. Woohoo. I love it. There are one or two rough patches but who the hell cares. The best tweed jackets have patched elbows. That was utterly awesome. Date: 06/14/2010 12:40 PM Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Cia It was all you, I just rearranged things a tad It's dark and sort of creepy but a very good story, one of emotional and physical dependence and addiction. It's very much a cynic's story, but since the main character is an assassin that stands to reason, I don't think they are your typical warm and fuzzy types Great work. Date: 06/14/2010 09:40 AM Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: The Nature Nut Whoa, that was different, dark, and fascinating. Original perspective. Nice story. Thanks for being creative. I enjoyed it. Date: 06/13/2010 08:30 PM

The Carthera are a violent race, never failing to respond to battle, they nevertheless are a proud and honorable people. Except for the ferals. Battles for territory, fighting persecution from the humans, for the right to rule, have echoed down through the ages. In these modern times things are different, easier. Laws are made--and enforced--and peace, of a sorts, is possible. Some seek to end that.

Title: Chapter 8 Reviewer: Nephylim Oh shit. Cia you are so good at this. You think things are going uphill and then you fall down a well Nice nice nice nice chapter. I want to watch ... *blush forgot his name* killing more bad guys. Nothing like a bit of torn out heart to relax you at the end of a hard day Author's Response: I'm a deceptive person. I seem all nice and helpful and mom-ish to people in person. But read my stories and you find a whole other Cia A nice bit of righteous retribution is always a nice way to release some tension. Writing it is just as much fun as reading it I think Hugs! Thanks for the review. And eh... without giving anything away; don't worry, there's a whole lot more 'fun' to come! Date: 12/10/2010 02:11 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete]

Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Most definitely still enjoying the story enough to ask! Can't wait for the next chapter! Date: 08/27/2010 12:20 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Any idea when the next chapter will be posted? Author's Response: I am trying to get the next chapter posted tomorrow. Life's been a tad hectic. I'm glad you are still enjoying the story enough to ask Date: 08/25/2010 05:08 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 9 Reviewer: TomasG I wonder if somewhere in all tjis process, Dane finds out about the inheritance. And they are able to put the motive to an attempted murder change against his sperm donor. It'll be fun to see this piece of excrement get his due. Date: 08/18/2010 06:51 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 9 Reviewer: Benjim The man is purely insane, I wonder if always was like this or has some sort of brain tumor, Pete mentions that he wasn't the same Alan he knew in school! Nice chapter, I do hope the Judge doesn't let him out, he is out to kill. Nice chapter Cia Date: 08/18/2010 04:53 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 9 Reviewer: Nephylim Oh what a beautiful chaapter... Okay maybe typed singing is not my forte but hey... It was a beautiful chapter anyway. God Dane's dad is a piece of work. Please don't let him get Dane back. Let him try to get at Tap and let him kick his teeth down his throat. Date: 08/18/2010 04:22 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 8 Reviewer: Benjim Interesting, was Dane drugged? Probably not, the doctors might have found something and being in a car crash sometimes requires the taking and testing of the victims blood. But the police were called in about the abuse, the accident being secondary. Dane's father is a fool, attempted assualt on Tap in front of witness's. With Dane's recovery and statement about his father, I guess they can re-charge him and keep him in jail another night or too! I can't see how Dane's father will be allowed to see his son again. Great 2 chapters Cia! Author's Response: Hmm... we'll see what happened eventually. You have given this a lot of thought, haven't you? Care to tell me how it ends up? C'mon... please? No? Ahh well, I guess I'll just have to wait until I write it. Thanks for keeping with the story and review!! Date: 08/10/2010 08:38 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Montreal Ormolu What a lovely story. I resonate with the feelings which you describe. You pull me into their lives. Thank you .Author's Response: Wow! Thanks for that. It's great to hear that I have managed to bring the story to life enough that you can feel involved. I appreciate you taking the time to leave a review and let me know that you are enjoying it! Date: 08/10/2010 07:49 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 8 Reviewer: Nephylim That was just truly awesome. I totally loved this chapter. These characters have come to life so much for me that i felt every moment of it, from Tap's feet in the carpark to Dane's fear and then the laughter... it was fabulous. Author's Response: I'm really glad I've still got your attention with the story. I have tried really hard to get into the characters with this story, to tell their thoughts, feelings and wants through their body language and interactions as well as the narration. Sounds like it's paying off. Thanks for the review!! Date: 08/10/2010 01:49 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Mykal I really like this story, as I have everything you've written Author's Response: Aww, thanks! That is so sweet of you to say! I'm glad you are enjoying the story. Hugs Date: 08/05/2010 04:42 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: sanman I'm looking forward to reading Escaping the pain, tomorrow evening. I suspect I'm gona need a box of tissues and some munchies. judging by the reviews it seems like its gona be a tear jerker. love them to bits. Take care, i'll writmore tomorrow Author's Response: Thanks sanman! I hope you do enjoy the story. It's not done yet but I promise not to leave readers in the lurch. I'm not sure if this is a tear jerker but it seems to be resonating with readers. I can't wait to read more of your thoughts as to the story. Date: 08/05/2010 01:37 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 7 Reviewer: Jared Wow Cia, I loved this chapter but stop holding out on us .... Anyways I can't wait for the next chapter, please will it be soon ? Love Jared Author's Response: I'm glad you liked this chapter Jared, and I'll try not to hold out on you too much Date: 08/04/2010 07:34 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 7 Reviewer: Nephylim Awesome chapter. Tap is the sweetest guy ever and I want him. Author's Response: LOL, mebbe. You'd have to create him though. I have no clue how to get him out of my head. Drat! Thanks for the review!! Date: 08/04/2010 05:45 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo sorry I haven't posted anything on the forum yet. I have a long review but have been camping with only my blackberry to review which won't get to the forums so it will be another day before I get that up...and considering it has been a whole week since your last post. I think you post another chapter. Now. please. a week is definitely enough buffer time. Date: 08/03/2010 04:09 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Also very curious about taps sexuality, which I'm guessing is gay and taps brother nagging had something to do with that, but I could be wrong... I have a longer review that ill post on the forum soon Author's Response: I can't wait to read your longer review. You'll just have to wait to find out about Tap. Can't be giving away the story to come Date: 07/29/2010 02:52 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo wow. Thanks for posting when you promised. Been thinking about what I wanted to say. That was such beautiful writing. Taps reaction was so intense and heartfelt. I am a softie for big strong guys that have sweet and compassionate personalities. Tap fits that bill perfectly. can't wait to see how Danes dad was related to the accident, I'm suspecting he drugged him and then forced him to drive... Author's Response: I guess we'll just have to see won't we Date: 07/29/2010 02:48 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo wow. Thanks for posting when you promised. Been thinking about what I wanted to say. That was such beautiful writing. Taps reaction was so intense and heartfelt. I am a softie for big strong guys that have sweet and compassionate personalities. Tap fits that bill perfectly. can't wait to see how Danes dad was related to the accident, I'm suspecting he drugged him and then forced him to drive... Date: 07/29/2010 02:48 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 6 Reviewer: Jared Wow Cia, I loved it ... All the emotion, I nearly cried... I can't wait to see what happens next Author's Response: Thanks Jared! I like hearing from an actual teenager that I am doing good with the emotions and relatability of the story. I hope I can continue to live up to the story. Thanks so much for reading and reviewing! Date: 07/28/2010 01:26 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 6 Reviewer: Nephylim Ooooh. Loving it. Very dark and emotional. I wouldn't be surprised if Dane's dad pulls some stunt to get himself out of trouble. I hope they don't stop Tap being with dane that would just be too cruel. Waiting anxiously for the next chapter... and hey lady you better stop telling me my writing is a punch in the gut Author's Response: lol, I figured you would like this story. Full of angst and torment. Though there is always some light. And your writing is a punch in the gut but I never said that was a bad thing! Love ya Nephy! Thanks Date: 07/28/2010 07:32 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 6 Reviewer: PArchment of love My Lord! This is such wonderful writing. It made me cry! more then once! I started reading on chapter one and just didn't stop and now I am waiting on edge for your next chapter! I just want to know what happened!!!! I feel like a five year old waiting to open presents on christmas. Wonderful. Simply wonderful. Author's Response: Aww, you cried? That's amazing! You're the first person to ever tell me that something I wrote brought them to tears. I am so glad you like the story. I promise, no long gaps in posting so you won't have to wait too long. Thanks so much for leaving me a great review! Date: 07/27/2010 11:21 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 6 Reviewer: Benjim Ah! Great chapter Cia! What I expected! I want to see how Dane's father is going to try and explain himself out of this one. I suspect under questionng by a bright detective Dane's father will explode and reveal his mask for all to see. And Dane will get put under the guardianship of Tap's parents. Author's Response: Double review, thanks e-fic Date: 07/27/2010 08:01 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 6 Reviewer: Benjim Ah! Great chapter Cia! What I expected! I want to see how Dane's father is going to try and explain himself out of this one. I suspect under questionng by a bright detective Dane's father will explode and reveal his mask for all to see. And Dane will get put under the guardianship of Tap's parents.Author's Response: LOL, glad I could fulfill your expectations, I hope that is a good thing. I think the story might still surprise you though. Thanks so much for your review. Date: 07/27/2010 08:01 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Awesome:) Could you post the link here? Thanks.Author's Response: Check the end of chapter notes on Ch. 6. Date: 07/26/2010 04:24 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 5 Reviewer: chas WOW thats a powerfull first few pages...Author's Response: Thank you so much Chas. I really appreciate that. The subject matter of the story isn't exactly cheerful but I always appreciate it when people let me know they are enjoying what I've written. Thanks again! Date: 07/26/2010 01:49 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo You know, personally, I think that 4 days is the perfect amount of buffer time between chapters... :)Author's Response: LOL. I'm working on it Adamo. I also started a topic in the e-fic discussion like you wanted I can't guarantee posting today but if not it will be up tomorrow. Date: 07/26/2010 09:36 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo do you have a forum going for escaping the pain?Author's Response: Actually I haven't started one. I just hadn't thought about it, lol. Too busy with other things I guess. I'll get on that. Date: 07/23/2010 10:40 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Tap is so adorable and empathic. Such a great character.Author's Response: He's one of my favorites that I've written. I have a weakness for strong yet gentle types I think. Date: 07/23/2010 10:37 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Oh I really hope you post soon. Im hanging on the edge of my seat!Author's Response: Can't post immediately, that would ruin the buffer I have between what's written and where I'm still writing the story, can't have that! But ch. 6 is written so I promise, no long break. Thanks for all the reviews Adamo! Date: 07/22/2010 11:01 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 5 Reviewer: TomasG Ok! I'm hooked, but I'll be mightly disappointed if Dane doesn't survive and his poor excuse for a father doesn't go to prison for a long, long time on a super bundle of charges. The least of which is attempted murder. I think that Tap has fallen in love with Dane and it is that love that will pull him through this crisis. oh! And I hate cliffhangers! lol Author's Response: Yay! Another reader on the bandwagon. Dane's dad... well Alan Kendricks is a piece of work, but a really smart piece of work. We'll have to see what happens to him! Thanks so much for the review, though I'm sorry about the cliffhanger since you hate them. Oh wait... no I'm not, that was just good stuff To soothe your cliffied nerves though I promise I won't be long before I post again. Date: 07/22/2010 07:28 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Thank's for posting! Intense and gah, cliffhanger! I love them, but I am really bad with them, I get kind of impatient. God, I hope Dane's okay. I bet it has something to do with the will, too. Dane's dad probably was trying to kill Dane so he would get the money from the will... Please, please post soon. Date: 07/22/2010 06:19 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 5 Reviewer: Jared Wow Cia... you were right, it wasn't happy but I loved the emotion - Can't wait for the next partsAuthor's Response: No, it's not a happy chapter but I hope that readers enjoy it. I'm really working to bring out the emotions in this story, I am glad its coming through loud and clear. Thanks for the review!! Date: 07/22/2010 04:40 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Benjim Hmmm, worthy cliffhanger!!! Well Danes father won't get away with this, setting the scene to look like Dane drove and had an accident! What puzzles me is why Dane's mother never divorced? She must have known something about her husband to have taken him out of control of the will, and if she ever caught one of his 'rage' epsiodes, she might have feared for Dane. Especially after Dane came out! Great chapter and story Cia, looking forward to more! Date: 07/22/2010 04:36 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 5 Reviewer: Nephylim WOW. That was... wow. I am fascinated to know what happened. I bet it had something to do with Dane's mother's will. I just can't wait for the next chapter so don't make me right!!!Author's Response: lol, I WOW'ed Nephy! Yay! I am so glas you are enjoying the journey of Dane and Tap. Promise I won't make you wait too long to find out, well, maybe. Date: 07/22/2010 04:33 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Any idea when you will be posting next? I am really excited to see what happens next and I am also wondering when you will address taps sexuality...Author's Response: Okay, 5 is posted, just for you Date: 07/22/2010 01:28 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 4 Reviewer: Jared Cia - I can't remember if I commented before, but this is just to say that i am loving it and i can't wait for the rest.Author's Response: You did, almost an identical comment actually, at least to the loving it and can't wait for more I'm really glad and thanks for leaving a review to tell me so, it's very encouraging. It's been a while since I was a teen, but I want the emotions to be right and since you're not complaining I hope I am. Date: 07/19/2010 04:58 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo intense. Tips just getting sweeter and sweeter. I'm am really liking these plot developments. The money aspect is an interesting twist and maybe a possible catalyst in the future...?...As always your writings fantastic. can't wait to see. What happens next.Author's Response: We'll have to see what incidents the money might incite... can't tell Thanks for leaving a review, I really appreciate each one I get and I like hearing thoughts on the story and the characters. Hope you continue to enjoy it! Date: 07/17/2010 11:15 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 4 Reviewer: Nanmander I'm totally reading this and listening to "Face Down" by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. It's a powerful experience, and you're really wrenching at my heart strings right now. Well-written.Author's Response: Thanks Nanmander!! This was meant to be an emotional piece, it definitely brings up some emotions in me to write and I would hope to evoke the same in the reader. To hear that I've succeeded in that goal is great. Thank you so much. That song is curiously apt, I found it because I was curious and I enjoyed it, if not so much the subject matter. Date: 07/16/2010 11:14 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 3 Reviewer: Nephylim That was a very powerful chapter. Sometimes the small things affect you more than the bigger things, like the little vignette with Tap's mother and the grip on his shoulder that was misunderstood by everyone. The sense of doom and foreboding is growing and I can't wait for the explosion. Personally I hope that Tap beats Dane's dad to a pulpAuthor's Response: Thank you Nephy. I really wanted to flesh out some of the other characters since I tend to focus so much on just the main characters in my writing. I can't say exactly what will happen to Dane's dad but well... I think you'll be happy. Thanks for the review hun!! Date: 07/14/2010 05:07 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Thanks for posting!Your writing is so beautiful. Its so hard to read about Dane's pain... in a good way, of course. And I absolutely adore Tap!Author's Response: Thank you so much. I never had my writing described as beautiful. I'm glad you are enjoying the story... well, as you can. It's certainly not a happy go lucky plot or easy to write but I am happy with it if that makes sense. Tap, well, in my mind he's a sweetie pure and simple. Glad that's coming through. Thanks again for the review. Date: 07/14/2010 12:01 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 3 Reviewer: Jian Sierra Loving it!Author's Response: I'm glad! Date: 07/13/2010 11:50 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Can't wait to see what happens next?Any idea when you will be posting next?Author's Response: Soon I made sure I had several chapters done before I started posting so that I hopefully won't have any large gaps in posting. Thanks so much for leaving a review! Date: 07/13/2010 06:14 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 2 Reviewer: adamo Wow. I am really enjoying your story. The characters really shine through. Tap is so sweet and Dane so hurt. The plot is really interesting. And the writing is great. I can't wait for more! Please continue writing.Author's Response: Thanks again Adamo. Getting compliments and thoughts on my writing is always a high for me. I appreciate all the reviews and I am so glad you are enjoying the story. I promise to post fairly regularly, so don't worry, each installment of Dane and Tap won't be too far apart! Date: 07/10/2010 12:42 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 2 Reviewer: Jared nice cia ...... loved it and can't w8 4 moreAuthor's Response: Thank you Jared! It means a lot that you would take the time to leave a review. I hope you continue to enjoy the story. Date: 07/08/2010 04:53 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 2 Reviewer: Anyta Sunday Wow. That was a very good read. I feel angry at Dane's dad, and sympathetic toward Dane. I think Tap sounds like a generally nice guy. I'm curious to see how this develops. Perhaps as one suggestion--when you switch into a different character's head, perhaps that could stay in a separate paragraph. Sometimes the hopping got a touch confusing (this is really a minor point in what I otherwise thought was a super chapter).Author's Response: I try to avoid switching mental/speaking in each chapter so I am glad you pointed that out. My beta reader and I are watching for that through the edits on the rest of my chapters and I will keep it in mind as I continue to write. Thank you so much!! I am glad the emotions of the plot are coming through. Date: 07/08/2010 12:44 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: blacknight I love this story, every day I'm looking forward to the next part. The little details about things are really fantastic, somehow they still leave room for our imaginations. Great writing :)Author's Response: I'm glad you are liking the story. Thanks so much for leaving a review blacknight! I always like to hear from readers, it keeps me motivated. I sometimes run a fine line between too much detail and just enough so I am glad you feel it isn't too overdone. Thanks!! Date: 07/08/2010 12:11 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 2 Reviewer: mcnc1966 God I feel for Dane! You have a wonderful talent at capturing raw emotion! Keep up the great work and know you have a true fan here.Author's Response: Thank you mcnc! I am glad you are enjoying the story. This is something that can really ring with people who have been through it so I hope I can do justice to the story and the characters. And a true fan :blush: I'm so flattered! Thanks!! Date: 07/08/2010 11:20 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 2 Reviewer: Nephylim Awesome. I hope Tap kicks that asshole from here to Christmas.Author's Response: LOL. If I know Tap... well, let's just say it'll be interesting. Thanks for leaving a review Nephy!! Date: 07/08/2010 10:18 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Anyta Sunday Dane and Tap are really sweet. I like the feeling I get for them. My favorite line was the kindergaten one. hehe. The Dad seems awful. Good tension/conflict. Awesome stuff! Author's Response: LOL. Yes, that was an intended laugh, I'm glad someone got it. I remember having those bullheaded tendencies as a teenager so I wanted to bring some of that out in my characters. The Dad... well, he's a piece of work. Hope you continue to enjoy. Date: 07/08/2010 02:14 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Jian Sierra A very nice start. Dane seems so delicate whereas Tap seems to be so confident about himself. This is going to be a great story. Hope to read the next chapter soon.Author's Response: Thanks you Jian! I appreciate you taking the time to leave a review. I like to offer differing characters that at times contrast and yet compliment each other. I hope you continue to enjoy the story. Date: 07/07/2010 04:03 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Wacko9001 Great start, i love your writing and sensory detail. i find myself relating to tapAuthor's Response: I know that not everyone falls on either side of the spectrum so much but a lot of the time people will relate to one body type or another, even if they aren't the average one. I identify with some of my characters more than others. I'm glad you liked the story! Date: 07/07/2010 03:43 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Menorain Gasp! There seems to be some sort of action going on here! One is very charmed, but it is a momentary effect. From the outset we can tell that this will be a tense one. Disappointingly, the unnecessary detail detracts from what could have been an opportunity for greatness and makes the reader feel as though they are clawing their way through these opening paragraphs. Then, almost impossibly, a miracle occurs. Cia plucks from her pocket, a cute coffee shop, and we are grateful to be presented with the chance to recuperate and wrap our heads around this tricky story. We do. She washes away the foggy atmosphere with intimidating ease and we stumble upon an amusing scene. Cia continues to paint a delightfully engrossing picture that stirs our imagination and wets our appetite for more. The teasing does come to a halt though, and just like Tap, we catch up with Dane. We learn the reason behind Dane's peculiar behaviour. The reader may feel indifferent to the revelation as they have probably seen this borderline cliché coming for a while. However, by this stage we're not interested in being shocked. In fact, it's the original manner in which Cia deals with the subject that grabs our attention. This plausible and widely enjoyable tale has certainly won over this fan. I eagerly await more.Author's Response: Even your reviews are entertaining Meno. Thanks for the compliments, I'll try to work on cutting down the unnecessary wordiness. Sorry, this isn't exactly a mystery story, I think it's pretty obvious throughout where I'm going. I'm glad you like it still at this point anyway. Thanks for the review, comments, criticisms and compliments, definitely something to think and work on! Date: 07/07/2010 01:19 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Nephylim As usual an awesome start to what seems like it is going to be an exciting and moving story. Your description of the desperation and out of control emotions was masterful and the suspense that built right to the end had me biting my knuckles. I am waiting breathlessly for the next installment, Don;t make me wait too long :)Author's Response: Thank you! This idea came out of nowhere for me but I have really enjoyed getting to know the characters. It is a very emotional story, highs and lows. I promise it won't be long before I update! Thanks so much for the review. Hugs Date: 07/06/2010 02:15 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: Renee Stevens This is a very moving story so far!! I love the care and concern that Tap shows to a guy he has just met and look forward to seeing what happens in the future! As for Dane's dad... I get the feeling that I'm not going to like him very much!Author's Response: Like you don't know Seriously, thanks for reading this and reviewing even though you are my beta reader and know how it goes! Tap is so sweet and yet fiercely protective. We haven't begun to see what he will do for those he cares about! Date: 07/05/2010 10:29 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: mcnc1966 POWERFUL! As usual, you have another great one building. Look forward to following Dane and Tap's journey.Author's Response: Thank you so much! I have written a fair bit of this story though it won't be a very long one. I am glad you are enjoying it, I promise to upload the next chapter soon!! Date: 07/05/2010 03:57 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete]

Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Do you think you will be getting the next chapter up soon? Author's Response: Sorry But it's up now Date: 10/01/2010 05:00 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Ahh. Dad's back. Not good. Tap and Dane having all those things in common and Dane getting all excited was so sweet. Beautiful chapter. Can't wait for the next one. Author's Response: Well Dad never went away You just haven't seen him in a while. Thanks for the review hun! Date: 09/25/2010 03:33 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 13 Reviewer: Nephylim Wow that was a roller coaster. There is something majorly sinister going on and i am suspecting everyone of foul play even Denise. You are so evilly clever, to show that there is somthing going on but not who or what is involved so we are on edge all the time waiting for the exe to fall but not knowhing where where or how. Very very nice Author's Response: So many plots within plots and Dane is the helpless center. Perhaps. And I take all my lessons in evil from you my dear Nephy. I'm only the student Thanks for the review! Date: 09/24/2010 12:35 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 12 Reviewer: Louis Keri and Patrick make wonderful parents. Dane and Tap make a wonderful couple. The first kiss and the writing of it, is treated with such respect and warmth and I needed to read that bit again and again. Your story is filled with raw emotion and colourful characters. Your message, as far as I can tell, is triumph in the face of adversity, and the character, Dane is superbly drawn; his character is diverse. I'm being sucked in and I'm enjoying this novel. Author's Response: I really want to make the characters into this story well rounded. I have certain traits that I have purposefully tried to bring to the fore but if I leave it at that then they fall flat as a 'real' person. I want them to be seen as the sum of their parts, not just the emotion or attitude that means the most to the story. That is also why I wrote Patrick to not accept Tap's revealation about being gay right away. There is such a thing as too good to be true and I didn't want to make his parents saints or anything. I've been known to re-read parts of my favorite books over and over so you saying you did that to a scene I wrote is an incredible compliment to me. Thank you so much! I appreciate your thoughtful reviews and the time you are taking to write them. Date: 09/17/2010 11:44 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 12 Reviewer: Nanmander Dane is adorable. I want to give him lots of hugs (he reminds me of my younger cousin). And I love his relationship with Tap; they balance each other out really well. Author's Response: Date: 09/16/2010 08:48 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 12 Reviewer: Nephylim Yay... that was the sweetest chapter ever. Awww... Dane is just so sweet. And Tap is fantastic. I want one Author's Response: I know! Me too!! I like Dane's sweet nature as well as his ability to endure. Tap is gentle and loving but full of fun. It's hard to say which I like more. Thanks for the review! Date: 09/16/2010 01:26 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 12 Reviewer: Montreal Ormolu Lovely story with winsome characters. Enjoying it greatly. Author's Response: Thank you for taking the time to let me know. I love hearing that people are reading and enjoying what I am posting. It definitely keeps me motivated to write, something that has been an issue for me lately. Thanks again!! Date: 09/16/2010 03:31 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 12 Reviewer: PArchment of love You made me get misty eyed and laugh out loud as always! I love how your stroy can go from beautifully sad to comically funny. It is a wonderful balance. Author's Response: Thank you! I write as the story comes but I can't stand just having one emotion truly dominate the chapters. In life I know that I often flash from one mood to the next so quickly, I like to include that in my stories. Date: 09/15/2010 09:24 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Danes response really gave an idea about what is going on inside his head, what he is feeling, the confusion and nervousness and the shock of Tap being gay and liking him.And Omigod Taps little speech about wanting to kiss Dane and his "can I kiss you again?" were so, so sweet and sexy. Fantastic chapter. Author's Response: Aww... I'm glad you liked that. I have to add in a bit of the love now and again though I'm sure it isn't helping Dane's confusion at all. Thanks for the review. Date: 09/15/2010 09:13 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo When you do you think you'll get chapter 12 up? Date: 09/15/2010 12:23 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 11 Reviewer: Louis Well, I am stunned. You'll get my review in the discussion forum. At the moment all I can say is, this rocks. Author's Response: Thank you! I look forward to reading your comments and thoughts about the story so far. Date: 09/08/2010 11:40 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 11 Reviewer: JeyO They kissed! They finally kissed! Aw! I loved the final fill-in on Daniels life and Patricks reaction afterwards... it was all just so sweet. Author's Response: I know Dane's been through the ringer and the story was emotional enough but I felt there needed to be a starting point, some explanation for the way he reacts. This chapter allowed me to fit that in. I'm really glad it worked and you enjoyed it. Date: 09/08/2010 09:10 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 11 Reviewer: Fastreader Yay!!! Dane finally found out how Tap really feels!!! Author's Response: Yes he did, though Tap had to take the situation literally into his own hands for Dane to get the picture, lol. Thanks for the review Date: 09/07/2010 11:48 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 11 Reviewer: Nephylim I bet. that was just awesome. It's beautiful Cia, really beautiful. I love this story. Author's Response: Thank you for always leaving such encouraging reviews and for the pm I'm always happy to hear someone whose writing I enjoy so much is engaged with a story I have written. Date: 09/07/2010 12:00 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Ah! A kiss! Oh Thank you Tap! You are wonderful.I hope you get chapter 12 up soon. I am so excited to see how Dane responds. Author's Response: Tap is amazing. And a good kisser I think I am working on 12, I hope to get it up in a few days. Thanks for the review! Date: 09/07/2010 04:40 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 11 Reviewer: TomasG Finally, glad that is out of the way. Now to put the father down. That piece of crap shouldn't be allowed to breathe the same air. Author's Response: Alan Kendricks is definitely a waste of space. I'm glad you think the long overdue feelings reveal came at a good time . Thanks for the review!! Date: 09/07/2010 12:43 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 11 Reviewer: PArchment of love That was just beautiful. Great work! Author's Response: Thank you! I am glad you are enjoying the story. This was both a sad and fun chapter to write. Date: 09/07/2010 12:15 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 10 Reviewer: Nephylim Yeah. Nice one. Neri I awesome. The power of the female eh? I so totally love this story and I am sooo worried about what Dane's father is up to. No doubt we will find out at some point. Author's Response: Well you have to love a girl that will stand her ground and let the boys have it Alan is one sneaky SOB, but he can't exactly hide what he really is for long. Thank you for your comments, I'm so glad you are still hooked! The good stuff should be coming soon. Date: 08/28/2010 05:40 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 10 Reviewer: adamo SO, so excited to hear the music. I really, really hope your post very, very soon Author's Response: I'll try Adamo Things are a bit busy here but I'm going to try to get this story finished and posted without much more delay. Thanks for continuing to read and review! Date: 08/28/2010 03:50 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 10 Reviewer: Benjim Aha! The first chorus of thye music selection is going to be played!! The intermission will be hell! Author's Response: LOL. Well the intro to the music at least. Thanks for reading!! Date: 08/28/2010 12:27 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete]

Title: Chapter 19 Reviewer: Nephylim WOW, you sure know how to write the suspense girl. I am glad you haven't totally neglected this one because it's a fantastic story. I can't wait for the next chapter to find out what goes on when Alan tries to kill Dane. I hope Tap tears hom off a new aresehole Author's Response: LOL. Thanks. Yes, this is building and building. The peak is coming soon I'm trying not to neglect any one thing too much but my plate has gotten very full lately. I plan to get in more writing time though, it's been sadly neglected for my ongoing stories for some time which annoys me. I will not leave this unfinished! Date: 12/14/2010 03:59 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 18 Reviewer: Frostina Uh oh!!! I tried... I really tried no to finish these chapters since i knew i would be fidgeting till the next one comes along!!Well, i finished them.. and now i'm fidgeting.... It was impossible no not read it all since i read the first two chapters... Please add more soon!!!Frosty Date: 11/25/2010 04:49 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Post soon? PLEASE. PLEASE. PLEASE Author's Response: I'm working on it. Between fine tuning Bonds Unbroken and only making it through 30k of my NaNo story this month my writing is suffering. I'm off for the holiday but I will be working on this. Don't worry! Date: 11/24/2010 12:39 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 18 Reviewer: Kanaye *tosses Alan out of an airplane*Did that work? *laughs*I like the serious talks and the Tap making plans w/o Dane. Naughty Tap. *shakes finger*Good chappy! *starts to count the seconds till the next one*PS. Good luck on NaNo! We can do it! Author's Response: I hope I can do NaNo. I'm being frightfully lazy about writing. It's just not working for me. I'll probably do a last minute marathon We'll have to see if Tap can keep himself out of trouble while I'm busy I'm glad you are still continuing to enjoy the story, thanks so much for leaving a review. Date: 11/16/2010 03:23 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 18 Reviewer: Quonus10 OHH Momma Kendricks SOOO needs a good bitch slappin. I think Keri needs to go have a talk with her, just make sure Pat Sr. is there to take care of the weasel of a son Author's Response: I know. She's a little seen character in the story but one that I love to hate. She has like zip redeeming qualities. Every once in a while I like to make a pure villian Thanks for the review!! Date: 11/13/2010 08:00 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 17 Reviewer: Kanaye Tease!*kicks NaNoWrMo*Good Chapter. Another gay jock? Hmmmm. Dave and Tap can beat Dane's father! Can't wait for the next one! Author's Response: LOL. Yeah, my beta is doing NaNo too so we're both hung up and trying to get that done and keep up with this project. Well I have to say that I think there have to be a lot more gay jocks in high school than one might think. The odds are just in favor of that. So I included a few. I guess I've never said but I believe the school to be fairly large in the story, several hundred high school students. That works with the possible percentages. Anyway, I'm not going to say what exactly happens with Alan and the inevitable confrontation but I hope you will like it. Thanks for taking the time to review my story!! Date: 11/07/2010 02:14 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 17 Reviewer: JeyO Oh GOD I would just die if Dave and Dane ended up connecting some how. It'd be so interesting! At first I was all for Charlie doing that but Dave seems better. Why am I so evil? ): Author's Response: LOL. Break up my lead characters? IDK, that's kinda evil. Gives a good reason to show off Tap's slight amount of jealousy and how cute he is that way though Thanks for the review! Date: 11/07/2010 02:00 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 17 Reviewer: Nephylim That was a very nice chapter. You still managed to get a shiver in there though. Right in the middle of that sweetness you drop the temperature like a stone with Alan - Bleargh. I wonder if Charlie is going to catch them 'at it' ? Author's Response: Hee hee. We'll see, so many options available for why they don't answer Charlie I want to keep Alan 'in the picture' so to speak but not really get into his plans. I'm glad that part is working out. We can't forget this isn't a completely happy story, though things are going well for Dane now. Thanks for the review, I always look forward to hearing what you think about my stories! Date: 11/06/2010 07:20 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 17 Reviewer: Benjim Interesting! Dane's father is till in the picture in this chapter. But the other thing is Mr. Echeheels phone call which ended in the verbage of 'Love you too" Hmm, I'm thinking the lawyer is leading a double life here. Dave is a distraction, but not a nemisis here. Hopefully Charlie just walked in while the two were still in the shower. I don't think Alan could react that quick! Nice chapter Cia, we just need to put the 'accdent' report to rest implicating Alan and maybe his mother, someone had to pick him up from the supposed accidenr scene. Author's Response: Of course. I'm not keeping this to third person limited so I can include Alan's devious dealings. Though I am only giving snapshots so that the reader knows he is still plotting but not exactly what is up. Increasing tension and all that. I promise, accident report and info coming up soon. Thanks so much for leaving a review. I always love to hear what you think is coming next. You are very intuitive. Date: 11/05/2010 02:20 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 16 Reviewer: Benjim Hmmm, the plot thickens! Alan is driven for revenge and still motivated by greed, I wonder if his mother helped him escape the staged accident scene! The cops are getting close to figuring this out, so it is a race with the stakes being Dane's life. I'm guessing that Dane's secret will come to an end soon, but Tap and freinds will keep him safe. Great Chapter Cia, looking forward to more! P.S. why didn't you start a reply thread in the forum? Author's Response: Oh but there is a topic in the e-fiction forum, just no one writes in it and I'm more of an author to respond to posts, rather than posting in there that I've put up a new chapter so that people see it. I appreciate it when they come but as long as I get a few reviews I'm happy with feedback this way as well. The different aspects of the story are all coming together, I'm glad that is apparent and yet you all are still in the dark as to how that will happen! Thanks for taking the time to review!! Date: 10/28/2010 02:31 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 16 Reviewer: Kanaye Bad Tap! Scaring the Poor boy!And I do hope the police find it was Dane's father who was responsible of the accident.Can't wait till next Chappy! Author's Response: LOL. Yeah, Tap can be a butt. I think Dane will keep him in line though. I'm working on trying to get this story all completed so I can post it while I'm focusing on NaNo so hopefully it won't be long before you get the next chapter. Thanks for the review!! Date: 10/27/2010 11:25 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 16 Reviewer: Nephylim Wow. Way to go to keep the pressure on. Sweet one minute, tense the next and shocking the third. I love Tap and Dane. They are awesome.. separate and apart. I love this story. Author's Response: I try! I like to keep the emotions moving through a chapter thoughs sometimes I focus on one or another more completely. Thanks for the review! Date: 10/27/2010 12:04 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 15 Reviewer: Benjim Hmmm, getting interesting with Dane free form the hospital and of his Dad. I'm sure we haven't heard the last from Daddy Dearest. But it does seem to be coming to an end, great story Cia!! Author's Response: Nope, we haven't. Things are culminating but we don't have the end quite in sight yet. Thanks for the review!! Date: 10/17/2010 07:32 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 15 Reviewer: Nephylim Aww that was so so sweet. A lovely respite for us all I think Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it. Getting out of the hospital and back to 'normal' is going to take all sorts of adjustments but life moves on. Things will start getting better now. Until... well, we'll leave that for later. Thanks for the review Nephy!! Date: 10/17/2010 07:39 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 14 Reviewer: Louis Dave! i swear if dave comes between them I'll slap him...LOL kidding. I am so glad gthat Dane will achieve Financial independence. The kid deserves it. You see, this is what I am talking about, getting so involved with the characters, feeling their emotions, living their dreams as though they were my own. Wow. Superb writing Author's Response: Uh oh... Dave. Hmmm... LOL. Don't worry, I won't break up my boys. I like their dynamic too much. I know it's not the most probable of circumstances but I didn't make him insanely rich and never having to work. I just added in enough good fortune to hopefully counteract all the bad things because, as you say, he deserves it. Life is a series of ups and downs for most people. Dane's are just a little bit higher and lower than most. Thanks so much for taking the time to leave a review!! Date: 10/17/2010 05:11 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 15 Reviewer: Kanaye YAY! He's out of the hospital!"Bitch slapping arm" *laughs* I like that. Author's Response: Well come on, we all know those girls on the shows like to slap I wanted that line to end the chapter with a bit of comedic relief but there was another aspect that I'm not sure came through completely. Dane has never had another person accept him being gay so while he may be so he's never had the chance to really think positively about it and joke. Tap in his simple accepting way is giving him that. I am glad you enjoyed the chapter and that he's out of the hospital. Things will be moving along now! Date: 10/17/2010 12:41 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: adamo Wonderful chapter Any idea when the next one will be posted? Date: 10/14/2010 12:40 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] [Respond] Title: Chapter 14 Reviewer: Kanaye Yay! He finally learned he has money! Author's Response: Yes he did. Glad you liked it! Date: 10/07/2010 11:09 PM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 14 Reviewer: Wyndham This is worrying. When things appear this good then something nasty is usually waiting around the corner..... Brilliant story. Sorry I've not been commenting each chapter, but I have enjoyed every one so far Author's Response: LOL. Yeah, I do like to torture my characters. Life is getting better for Dane but I don't think he's forgotten his father. He's a smart guy after all. Thanks for much for commenting; it's fine that you aren't commenting after each chapter, there are times I do the same. I appreciate it when you do though! Date: 10/07/2010 11:18 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete] Title: Chapter 14 Reviewer: Nephylim That was an exciting and hopeful chapter. It bothers me though that Dane is going to be on his own that makes him far too vulnerable to his father. The inheritance explains a lot about the accident though. Author's Response: Well he won't be on 'his own' really. He'll have Tap during the day and Charlie at night. I think you'll find that Dane becomes a lot more social when given the opportunity. The inheritance was introduced earlier and sort of downplayed. It's not a ton but when you have someone as egomaniacal as Dane's dad it's certainly part of the problem. More drama to come though, how could I resist?? Thanks for the review hun! Date: 10/07/2010 11:13 AM Admin Options: [Edit] [Delete]

Title: Chapter 2 Reviewer: phana14 Oops! I was wrong about the people on the phone! Oh well. Maybe they'll turn out to be bastards later on in the story. AND FINALLY! A little hanky-panky! Even the boys knew that they were overdue. For heaven's sake, they didn't even undress! Horny much? I really like the detectiveness of the story(s). A new angle, if you will. Great story, Cia! Thanks. Date: 12/16/2010 07:20 AM Title: Chapter 1 Reviewer: phana14 uh oh! "...we know you just got in last night from an out of town case." How the hell would "we" possibly know that? There's someone in the woodpile here! Cia! I honestly think that this chapter is an improvement over the four in "Double Down". It could be my imagination but I don't think so. Also, thanks for explaining WHY there have been no shenanigans going on. In due time, I suppose. Thanks, Cia. Date: 12/16/2010 06:38 AM

Title: Chapter 4 Reviewer: phana14 I COULD have rated you higher for this very sweet and exciting short story, but I didn't because you COULD have allowed Marc and Nat a tiny bit of the nasty. pOn a serious note, I started with this story because it is dated the earilest of the group, and I thought it might be quite fun to watch as you improve with each succeeding story. And thank you very much for this one, Cia! Date: 12/16/2010 05:41 AM

Since Dane and Tap were driving up to Districts alone Tap decided to leave much earlier than the team would. He had been concerned that the traveling would be a bit hard on Dane and wanted to be able to stop frequently if they needed to. The sky was barely lightening when they got up to leave but the slight coolness was welcome before the sultry heat of the day would hit. They hit a fast food drive-thru for breakfast before they hit the ramp for the interstate and headed out of town. They di

Charlie moved quickly into the living room and noticed the jackets that lay over the arm of the couch. He silently moved to the bathroom and nudged the door the rest of the way open. The shower curtain was open and there were clothes strewn on the floor. The door to the spare bedroom was open and the room empty but the door to Dane's bedroom was shut. Charlie slowly turned the handle and then pushed the door open quickly. The small room was lit by the light shining in from one of the outside

Dane spent the time Tap was in practice at the library. He had managed to stay caught up with his assignments and the teachers agreed to let him take his make-up tests in the library after school while he was waiting for Tap so it actually worked out really well. The library was close to the locker rooms so Dane saw the team coming off the field and down for showers. He packed his books up into his backpack and slowly made his way out of the building over to Tap's car. He was moving slow enough