Andrew Q Gordon

Well since you put it like that. I think that was somewhat clear from the discussion George had with Jervis. He wanted Calder to get there first so George didn't steal his thunder. That said, the person of Sir Elliott Gilbert is apt to put a damper on Calder's self aggrandizement. But we all Know that Jervis was made an Earl for this action and Nelson got Knighted so, they both did okay in the end - or will do okay since it's not written yet.

Nope Sorry Westie, I don't see it that way It didn't 'feel real to me. Sure you can have a 'moment' but that doesn't change supposed deep feelings. If he loved George the way he said - and showed in the story -and he said he loved George since they were young, he wouldn't have dumped him that fast and with no explanation either. So now we find out he also 'loved' his cousin for just as long? Like I said, it felt like a convenient excuse to clear him out for something to come. Not that it kills the story, not by a long shot, it probably makes it more interesting overall, but SOMEONE has to tell the emperor . . . err Mark . . . he has no clothes

What's handwrite? Okay just kidding, I totally type WAY more than hand write, Do you still have a typewriter in your home?

Clearly you're aren't a power top, nor have you dated one if that is what you think. As for them being out of Granger's life, maybe I misread things, but I got the impression that Phillip loved George more than George loved him. It felt like George liked him quite a bit and even may have loved him in a way, but it was not the same deep, Travers/Calvert/Freddy kinda feelings. But this 'switchero' by Phillip, seemed - well forced. Sorry, but I'm gonna be critical for a moment. From the moment Phillip initiated George into the club, it seemed he was in love with him, in fact he said he'd been in love with George forever. Them, while George is giving it to him and Sommers is giving it to George, he has a moment with his cousin and wham, Goodbye George, hello cousin. And they'd been on the ship together for a while, so it's not like this couldn't have been worked out earlier or in a different way. It just felt like a way to get the love struck Phillip out of the way for whatever devious plans you have in the works for the next couple chapters. Oh and as for Lennox, that was basically what I thought, so thank for confirming it. Guess he won't be getting an invite to the 'Branded Wrist' Gentlemen only club.

Oh yes, stupid people doing stupod things drives me to want to hit something, speaking of driving, it usually happens when I'm driving too. Have you ever agreed to a date, then met someone else you thought you liked better and broken the date? (For the record, I have NOT, but I almost did once, Turned out I didn't like the second one better, so I was glad I didn't )

She-ra, Princess of Power - I always wanted to be a Princess If you could thank only one person tomorrow, who would it be?

So Kerry and Sommers - both dumped poor George for each other - whatever! Two Power tops can NOT make a serious go of it, no matter how 'hard' they try. I give that a week or less, before one or both will be back begging for George's tail But this is London and Freddy is still here and so is Lord Chartley. Lennox of course is there as well, but I sense his interests aren't quite as keen as the others. Of course there is always room for a new love to show up as the new 1st Lt. But back to the original theme - I don't think we've seen the end of Sir Phillip.

Well scratch two potential lovers from the List of those Granger might fall in love with. I still vote for Freddy, but what do I know. It is nice that you have ONE straight sailor in the Navy in the person of Mr. Clifton. That said, I'm sure you're put hiim in an uncompromising position soon enough.

What exactly is hidden behind Billy's "X" ?

Having read wayyyyy to many comic books as a kid, If I had to pick one superhero it would be either Silver Surfer or Green Lantern. Interestingly enough, when they did the battle of the two comic universes, and they paired 'like' heros to face off, they had these fight it out. At least I'm consistent

Too many to mention, so yes, there is/are. Since apologizing to people is part of the 12 step program Not that I've ever been to one : Is there something your addicted to?

Thanks Billy, Not sure I can live up to the expectations, but I'll do my best. As for something from Peter's POV - well that's in the works, but I'm not sure how he'll come across. Things can't be roses and cupcakes all the time for these two, else it'd get old fast. And the plot I have might not cast him in the best light - though to be honest, it - the plot - is not final so there is a good chance things will change along the way

Zombie, I don't think you can be 'too beautiful' though Menelaus and Paris might disagree where Helen was concerned. Booth is definitely very cute/hot/beautiful, take your word, but is by no means the most hot/cute/beautiful man I've ever seen, Which is why I say you can't be, because there will always be some who disagee on his status as #1.

Yeah, that's f'ed up. I have a potty mouth that I'm trying to reform and I NEVER use that word.

No promises, I really want the whole thing done before I start posting, though I might, stress might, be persuaded to post it once I get at least for of the 5/6 chapters remaining. but let's see how far I get this weekend

Been a whore's age [i love that phrase, now to work it into a story somehow] since I've updated here, so here goes. Finished a project that may or may not be posted on GA, time will tell, but that's all I can say. Bout to finish writing Purpose got the basics of the next two already written, about 6000 words worth, might be a bit less. Figure I got three or four left after these two, maybe five, not 100% sure. I've started, read wrote a few pages, of a sequel to Second Shot and a companion story. Neither have gotten very far yet, but a start is how all stories begin. I still hope/wish/ and deluding myself, that I'll get to writing ArchAngel into a full story. Same with a Cold Rain. Need to make sure I don't write another anthology story that has a premise I love and want to expand on. That might prove harder than I want, but we'll see. Now that I'm back at work, my time is harder and easier to find to write. I find if I work real hard during my free hours at work, I can get done with an hour to spare and I'm using that to write. That and the hour at night after lil' Q goes to sleep. Here's hoping I can be productive. Andy

I haven't read Robyn's story, but I think I shall have to start. Perfect Pitch is a favorite of mine, and I have to say the reviewer really captured how I felt. Sometimes stories reach out and grab you and you connect to the characters. It's almost impossible for me to say why, or how, but this one does that. If you haven't read it, read it, it's well worth the time. Now I need to make time to read Robyn's story, Cia is not an easy critic, so that's a good sign all by itself.

I've been a bit busy lately and not very active so when you chose a topic I hold near and dear, I figured I try to dip my toe back in the water I feel like I need to go back and edit my comments cause after reading them they don't read so well, but by nature I'm lazy so I'm gonna let it go

Renee, You know I'm quite draconian about head hopping, I just think it's rather disruptive and interrupts the flow of a story so Bravo on the topic. Sometimes writers try to get around it by saying they're using two perspectives for the story, but that is also disruptive unless - as our friend Nightowl does - you separate them into distinct sections and keep the same perspective through the section. One thing I'd like to add, head hopping creates the need for the writer to either name names all the time - Simon says - [couldn't resist] Richard did this, Simon did that, etc, which as Anyta pointed out to me a while ago creates a disconnect with the reader. The idea being you don't go around saying people's name every time you address them, so the characters ought not do it either, but the need to identify the speaker can lead to the need to keep 'naming names'. If you stick to one perspective, in theory you can use, he/she, him/her, his/hers in place of the main characters name all the time. Using your example #2 - I'd suggest editing it further: Old: "I wondered how I'd gotten home that night," Simon answered as he contemplated Richard's answer. "I had to go back to the club the next day to retrieve my car. So did I pick you up at the club?" Simon asked. New: "I wondered how I'd gotten home that night," Simon He answered as he contemplated Richard's answer. "I had to go back to the club the next day to retrieve my car. So did I pick you up at the club?" Simon asked. If you're only using 1 perspective per story or per section, the 'He' is implied, because who else's head are we in that we learn he's contemplating something? [The last speech tag is redundant, give it's still part of Simon's dialogue and there is a question mark at the end and should be eliminated. ] I know folks are resistant to sticking to one perspective because it's so much easier for them to explain things using the other character's thoughts, but any good writing class or book will stress the need to stick to one perspective and if you MUST use more than one, segregate them by distinct sections. My 2 cents.

Replying to you one sentence response to my review - Whatever! I was going to leave it at that, but please, do I look that stupid - wait, don't answer that. What I mean is that's like saying you won't come in. . . err. . . maybe that's not a good analogy, what I really mean is this is a Mark Arbour story with the Randy Captain George who is banging or getting banged by a ship full of hot hung horny seamen. He's gonna have more than one, it's just a question of who and when and where. There, that's the right response.

You go Vic!

Welcome and enjoy your time, if you have questions ask someone, most everyone is rather helpful, and those that aren't . . . err . . . there aren't any of those here are there?

I read this over the summer - riding the bus in Vancouver - **waves to Conner and Ramon** to and from soccer/football matches at Univ of B.C. I understand what the reviewer said and while I can agree with the 'points' about Rory being unredeemed and why would either Luke or Seth like/lust after him given his behavior, I think that isn't the measure of the story. To me where this was so brilliant was that through it all I DID care about the characters, the fact I was pissed as hell at Rory is an emotion every writer should strive for and which Dom achieved so well in this. Yeah you hate how he treated Eddy, how he was such a prick to Luke and how he was so two faced, etc, but that's not liking what the character is doing. The fact I had those emotions showed that Dom reached out through his words and got me to feel something, to connect - even if negatively at times - with his characters. There was also an element of believability. Rory didn't transform over night, he didn't stop being a prick on a dime and make Seth fall for him, it was a slow gradual evolution and even if he never was punished for his actions, he also didn't step off the plane, meet boy and live happy ever after. So for me, this was a great read for all the feelings and connections it evoked when I was reading it. I think it was worth the 5 stars it has earned.

Dave, When you put it like that luck is overrated eh? But I didn't mean to suggest I didn't have it good, just wish me luck finding enough time.

Mark, you really are setting things up to cause trouble for our poor boy George. Let's see, Summers, Kerry, Llywellen and now the dashing and cute young Mr. Lennox. Then there is still Calvert sailing around somehwere, Arthur, Freddy and Chartley back in London, however is a man to choose??? Seriously, I sort of see issues not only on Belvideria, but also back in London. There are quite a few handsome and influencial men who are lusting after George and it seems, all but Calvert - who's not that influencial anyway - are all going to be in London. Who will he pick? Kerry? Chartley? Cavendish? Lennox has to be a player now that he's on board and is clearly enamoured of his new captain. So many men, so little privacy LOL.