Ron

The humor worked into the story all along has been fun. And worth a real laugh here and there as well.

I thought Mark was a bit of a dick and then I didn't but now I do again. Make up my mind for me, will ya. I need vindication - should I or shouldn't I. Yeah.

I keep trying to decide if the character, Mark is a dick or not. Ross has basically been hitting on him since the door knob incident and Marks been behaving like a dick. Then something in the writing, like in this chapter, makes me think he's not such an purposeful asshole after all. Ross seems like one of those successful types that are used to getting their own way, mostly, and he's forceful about getting his way too. That the character also isn't afraid to compromise or apologize when required to do so, moderates his aggressive qualities. Top all that off with a physical description that makes him a walking wet-dream and we get... well, we got Mark having a shower. Good fun.

I could use about double the wordiness that I'm getting easily as I quite like it. But, the story chapters have been shortish from the beginning and the story has been interesting so I guess I'll just read along.

Everyone loves, Matt.

Something was Raging, that's for sure. Really one of the better sex scenes I've read. I didn't gloss over any of it like I usually do in a story. So, yeah, having Michael hesitate was sort of endearing but mostly understandable. Man on man is not his usual modus operandi after all.

My grandmother, from Kentucky, used the term 'flitter' when describing that particular part of the female anatomy when referencing mini-skirts, when they were in vogue. "I can't understand why those women would want to run around showing off their flitters.", she would say. I will say, that this was pretty believable writing. Within the context of the story, all the cussing just made since. As for the rest of what's going on, the dysfunctional relationship the two characters have seems to function quite well at the moment. Good writing, good story.

They certainly were hard to get through. What was it, a whole book to get through 3 days or something like that.

Brandon Sanderson completed the Wheel of Time series in 3 volumes, Kitt. I forgot to mention that much. I think it's the best he could do and still get all the ducks in a row. Don't know if you read 'New Spring' 2004, Jordan which was a breath of fresh air at the time because it harkened back to the beginning of the series and it's ease of writing? Sanderson brought that style and ease back to the series at the end.

Wheel of time has been finished by Sanderson based on Jordan's extensive notes and with the wife's approval. The last novel in the series is on it's 5th printing, I believe. I've been savoring it section by section (not chapter) so I can prolong the finish.

Sorry for the two blank reviews. Normally I read the reviews then hit the bottom right corner to go to next chapter. Well, there weren't any and in my eagerness to get to the next chapter... So..., that waitress, huh. The way she is described is perfect. She's a hoot and would fit almost any small casual restaurant anywhere. You would know her instantly.

This first chapter is very nice introduction to your story. Making assumptions on what I've read here leads me to think that the time I spend reading your words will be well worth it.

The Wheel of Time series - Robert Jordan/Brandon Sanderson The Hobbit / Lord of the Rings series - Tolkien Ringworld series - Larry Niven The Saga of Recluse series / The Corean Chronicles - L.E. Modesitt, Jr. Memory, Sorrow And Thorn series / Otherland series / Shadow series - Tad Williams The Robot series / The Foundation series - Asimov The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant 1st & 2nd series - Stephen R. Donaldson The Trade Pact Universe series / The Clan Chronicles series - Julie E. Czerneda The Tawny Man / The Liveship Traders / The Farseer / The Soldier Son - all Trilogies / The Rain Wilds Chronicles - Robin Hobb A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin The Sword of Truth series - Terry Goodkind The Stone Dance Of The Chameleon - Ricardo Pinto (what an amazing world he created - heavy read but I highly recommend) As you can see, I am a series kind of guy.

I absolutely agree with the importance of this type of lesson for our kind. I use the terms 'our kind' and 'my kind' when speaking to others occasionally when it seems relevant to a conversation or a discussion because I feel a necessity to claim others like me. It's important to have an identity among the many and to know that you belong somewhere in the scheme of things. We need to defend and remind ourselves of our history so we don't forget and to others so it is not forgotten by them. I don't mean to suggest that you think otherwise or were implying anything to the contrary, I'm sure of it. But I would like to remind folks that it is also important for gay people to be inclusive in their thinking where others have experienced similar fates. We should be mindful that others have suffered from hate and bigotry, from being marginalized by society, from being told that there is no reason for your existence and murdered for it. We can't afford to become too insular in our caring. That's a step, however small some might find it to be, that Israel is making by including a pink triangle in their monument. That Jews were not alone.

I watched the video and read the article, Bill. It is an important gesture, I think. Young people I've spoken to about the subject don't seem to be aware that homosexuals were also victims during the Nazi campaigns. Anything that reminds us that more than one ethnicity, group or affiliation of people suffered is important. What I found compelling also, were the responses to the article at the bottom.

The simple answer to the question is no, I did not call the author stupid. The author had written something that I found difficult to accept without some chain of events leading up to what was written. My review stated why it was that I had found it to be so; unless some combination of X, Y or Z proceeded the incident in question and because without any of the progression, it just made the authors characters seem a bit stupid. I also stated that I had liked this, this and that about the story afterwards and that I was looking forward to seeing what the author had done with the story. This was the first review. There was a second review, two chapters later. In this I wrote that I couldn't continue reading the story because what had prompted me to write in the first review, was even more pronounced here. I went on to say why, using a different set of X's, Y's and Z's, that the story had not made the connection that needed to be made. I finished with my thought that had what was written held off until a later time in the story, it might have been a better read. The End. Until I received the author's reply. When I started this thread these two reviews were one continuous review in my mind and not separate creatures. After reading the many posts that expanded upon my original question, I went back to my notes on the altercation. I respect that everyone responding to this thread, and some of those whom are not, have strong views on the subject of reviewing and an author's possible reaction to a less than positive review. It is very evident in the differing opinions conveyed in the posts that this is a somewhat passionate issue. So, I decided to dig up the pertinent facts within the original reviews and present them without giving up too much information in hopes of ending any guessing as to how I used the word 'stupid'. Indeed, that word may not have been the operative point in causing me to get the unpleasant reply to my review. Please keep in mind that I read all the posts in this thread and unless a body is responding to another poster, I consider everything to be directed to me and any other further edification that other readers get out of this is entirely a bonus. I am not offended by anything that has been said I assure you. I quite like the debate and have found it to be of much help. And that is a very good point, Lugh. Without that internalization and the resultant self-examination there might not be growth in an individual. I went in a positive direction after much thought and after some things were pointed out to me. I came to the conclusion that while I wasn't necessarily at fault, perhaps I could have written the review in an different way. At the end of the day I think that I had some positive growth as an individual by writing a review.

The Irish Springers, huh. Hmmm, that reminds me of something. No relation to the Spaniards, right? No, of course not, that would be too much of a coincidence. A shower followed by a bath seems a great luxury. I love to soak in the tub. I haven't had one in years. Shower will have to do.

Absence does not necessarily make the heart grow fonder, I know this from experience. The funny part of it is that the doubt isn't focused on the one who is gone so much as it is one left behind. It can often lead to introspection and self-examinations that might give a strong heart pause. Was it something I've done, what if I'm not good enough, he took the job because he needed to get away from me, etc... Totally believable character behavior. You've got a nice story here, Thorn. Real nice. ps. If Charlie H is a favorite of yours, then it's not really random is it.

I read this for the first time at 12:42 am this morning after, shall we say, 2 or 3 glasses of wine. I had put down the glass and swallowed before coming to that crucial sentence. There was no spewing involved but I almost found myself rolling around on my back on the floor laughing, perhaps with my tongue hanging out, I won't recall. I re-read this short story in the light of the day and sobriety. If anything, it was more amusing the second time around. Not that I didn't notice the first time but to capture those wonderful gems implanted within the tale with more clarity was an absolute delight. May I reference a link to this on my Facebook page? Is it allowed? I have a few dog loving friends that I think will get a kick out of this. And if they don't, their loss.

I found this in response to a search based on Prompt 253 that another writer, inthebrinkoftime had referenced in answer to the creative wedding scenario in his story. Mann, am I glad I did. Like your protagonist, bitch slapping twink vampires are something I definitely didn't expect to run into. Much amused here, really. Very nicely done.

Dear tbot, You have posed the question, poetically even, yet we have not heard of your answer to it. Are you truly looking for advice, dear Sir? I may have some for you... To whom am I kidding, of course I have advice and I'm going to let you have it. Shower in the morn, thereby ending the useless slaughter caused by your careless sling and odiferous arrows. Begone that malodorous whiff of discontent under the sheets by washing those offensive points in the sink. Defend yourself and by opposing end them. There's something very nice about the warm clean scent of a man under the sheets. I don't need the extra wake-up call in the morning either. We won't be forgetting about me, will we. I will stand against the inquisition and answer your question. I. Don't. Stink. And, no, that is not a conceit of mine. Every man who has stuck around long enough to notice has commented on it. "You never smell", they say. I get what they mean. If you were to put a shirt I've been wearing all day over your head and took a big whiff, you would know I have a smell. Just saying by the way, I'm not offering try outs. The scent is warm and clean, kind of like that man under the sheets I was talking about earlier. I had a boyfriend that liked a bit of ripeness but quickly learned that I did not. I was quite vociferous against it and he soon cleaned up his act, for 18 years. So, me, the question, the answer. I do shower every day at some time during the morning or evening. I'm, ambishowerous.

Good advice, Cia and thanks. I have been making the effort to do just this. My emotional entanglements (feelings and or passion) are partially why I post a review to a story and sometimes it is the guiding force. I'm much more cognisant of how that might work to the detriment of what I am trying to convey now. Joann, thanks. Your absolutely correct in that honesty is the way to go. I'm not sure I could write something that I didn't believe to be true in a review. If I couldn't word it without being comfortable with what I'm trying to say, I probably wouldn't post it. thebrinkoftime, would you mind horribly much if I shortened that to, tbot. All lower case, of course. You're absolutely correct in that it is in fact self-reflection that has brought about an improvement. If it had gone differently, as you've witnessed, I probably would have left GA entirely. Damn the torpedoes, full steam ahead and yea, Ron. But it didn't, that's not me and I think I'm a better person for it. Thank you very much for your comments pertaining to my possible writing skills. I'm happy to find that you've picked up my intimation about having ideas. Any illusions I have for writing are in front of me on lined note paper, tissue paper, the back of various receipts and junk-mail envelopes right now. That they may end up in the trash can is a distinct possibility. Thank you, Clumber for coming to my defense. I do understand what your saying and I agree to a point. I thought the reply to my post was out-of-line too but to be fair and I'm not saying that this is true, mind you. There maybe, might have been the word, 'stupid' somewhere in my review. As you probably all know and I learned after the fact, in the rules of behavior on GA, that word is a no, no. A finger shaking, slap on the hands - no, no. In hindsight, and after some self-reflection (tbot), I think I knew on some instinctual level that that was not the way to go when I wrote the review. Yet, those pesky emotions that I have got in the way of common sense. I do think I'm a better person in the end. Life is on going, right, and growth should be part and parcel of the event. I think my reviews are better. I still have the belief that my reviews are sometimes clever and sometimes witty but never at the same time, that would be way too much to expect from me. If any of the few other viewers of this thread would like to chime in, I would be much obliged to hear from you. The more the merrier. I have much to learn.

The funny thing about cowboy stories is that they want to make me speak and write cowboy. Or, maybe I want to do that anyway and your just offering the opportunity to do that inside my head. There doesn't seem to be enough cowboy in the lingo. There's a lot going on in this chapter and because of this the pace of the story seems to be matching the number of things that need to be done. I have mentioned story pacing in the past to you and this is especially applicable here. We are not going to go away if you slow down the story a bit. I like details as well as the next person and I think the old saying, 'The details are in the pudding' may apply here. You're giving me the details but I'm not tasting the pudding so much. Every moment doesn't need it's own short sentence. I'm getting the sense that I'm on a block and chop, chop, chop. Life flows and the sentences need to flow along as well. I am enjoying your story and I quite like the fellas and Ed's wife is just fine as a supporting character. I know what's happened to Hunter and I know what's happened to Seth and we're learning what's going on now with those two and some of the others. What I don't have is a good description in my head of what these boys look like physically. Are they 6'2" or 5'7", whip thin, muscularly lean or beefed up, heavy set, do they have those creases at the corners of their eyes from being out in the sun even though they're still young, maybe it only shows up when they smile, what color or style of shirt does Hunter prefer and are his boots worn or well taken care of. I'm sure you know what I'm getting at. I don't feel I know these fellas all that well even if I like them based on their behavior and their circumstances. To be fair, I did learn that Seth was 6" soft. Now ain't that something. Whip up that puddin' for us, Zandra. Make us fall in love with those boys.