I can relate to Jay being unaware of being treated as the Golden Boy. I was first born and the only boy [first-born son is a big deal in a Jewish family]. I didn't do well at sports but I was award-winning in academics. And I was totally oblivious to being treated differently from how my two sisters were.
Another factor in the unequal treatment is that Jay (mom's first-born baby) moved far away from "home," while it sounds like his brothers still live relatively nearby. That alone could double the royal treatment Jay receives whenever he's visits his folks.
Loren, on the other hand, is oblivious to what a huge contribution he is to people. It just comes "naturally" to him to help out people he knows. You don't have a huge number of on-line followers compared to Jay, Loe to the rescue. Mom doesn't honor and include your fiancées, Loe to the rescue. Jay isn't aware that you're jealous your folks treating him better than you -- just wait for the upcoming chapter in which we'll see Loe to the rescue.
Keep the great chapter after great chapter coming, @Mrsgnomie This story is such a joy to read.