I Am Fire - 1. Chapter 1

The fire met its nemesis, but I also see it as a love story. Very nice.

neatly done. a clear and effective metaphor. a rather sad story behind it, i'd guess. thanks for sharing.

I have to be honest. I read yours pretty early in the game but was hesitant to comment. So, I'm going with honesty. I felt a young earnest young person wrote this looking for help and pleaded within his soul. I loved it. Your writing is very fresh. I enjoyed it so much. At first, I didn't know what to say. After much thought. Here it is. Girl, you should write more poetry:)

I'm reading a story of a energetic person whose contact with a suffocating relationship brings them to a new low and steals their candor. Very poignantly told. Well done.

A hot lover in a relationship stymied be a colder, unfeeling soul. It happens all too often in relationship, but never explained as well as this. Nicely done.

How heart rending! So very tragic. Really well done and illustrative. Great job and thanks!

On 05/02/2014 06:19 AM, Ashi said:

The fire met its nemesis, but I also see it as a love story. Very nice.

I wouldn't call it a love story. There may have been love at one point, but it was quickly tempered. I'm glad you read it and liked it Ashi.

On 05/02/2014 06:27 AM, carringtonrj said:

neatly done. a clear and effective metaphor. a rather sad story behind it, i'd guess. thanks for sharing.

Thanks Carringtonrj, for reading and reviewing. Most of my poems are pretty straight forward with clear meaning. I don't think I'm all that good with Poetry, so my poetry tends to be literal.

On 05/02/2014 11:30 AM, Cole Matthews said:

How heart rending! So very tragic. Really well done and illustrative. Great job and thanks!

Thanks Cole, I struggled writing this poem. I hoped I conveyed the right message, it was a pretty literal one. It doesn't even necessarily have to do with love and relationships, but over all it's sad to think about such a bright soul being controlled in such a way.

On 05/02/2014 11:18 AM, Bill W said:

A hot lover in a relationship stymied be a colder, unfeeling soul. It happens all too often in relationship, but never explained as well as this. Nicely done.

Aww, thanks Bill. Yes, I feel it happens all too often, for different reasons and it is sad when it happens. I'm glad you read and liked the poem.

On 05/02/2014 10:57 AM, Mann Ramblings said:

I'm reading a story of a energetic person whose contact with a suffocating relationship brings them to a new low and steals their candor. Very poignantly told. Well done.

Thanks Mann! Yeah, that is definitely the story I had in mind. I see it happen so many times. It's happened to me once or twice. Thank you for liking the poem.

On 05/02/2014 10:41 AM, joann414 said:

I have to be honest. I read yours pretty early in the game but was hesitant to comment. So, I'm going with honesty. I felt a young earnest young person wrote this looking for help and pleaded within his soul. I loved it. Your writing is very fresh. I enjoyed it so much. At first, I didn't know what to say. After much thought. Here it is. Girl, you should write more poetry:)

Aww don't be hesitant. It's just something that happens with people. The happy go lucky girl runs into a guy that tells her she's stupid.. etc. I see that happening all to often and I think it's just sad. It's sort of a hidden away poem that someone going through this won't share. Not to the person they're involved with, because usually in those relationships they think they're in love, when they're just scared. I hate seeing anyone feel controlled and confined, I know I hate the feeling. BUT, this is a poem that's not about me today, so no worries.. lol. I know I could have scared a few people that have read my other poems, because they were mostly about the hubby or my past.. in a way it is, but I got out of those situations pretty quickly, so they don't bother me today.

Krista, you're indeed fire that no one can tame. It was beautiful

On 05/02/2014 02:33 PM, nostic said:

Krista, you're indeed fire that no one can tame. It was beautiful

Aww thank you. I wish everyone never be 'tamed,' especially in the name of 'love.'

Controlling people often smother others. I hate that they felt they had to stay instead of taking their chances to get beyond the storm and letting their flame burn bright again. Interestingly bittersweet Krista.

On 05/04/2014 01:19 PM, comicfan said:

Controlling people often smother others. I hate that they felt they had to stay instead of taking their chances to get beyond the storm and letting their flame burn bright again. Interestingly bittersweet Krista.

That's usually how it goes, right? The controlled see a glimmer of hope or a little bit of softness, so they stay to see more, not realizing they're fighting ghosts of the person they are with.. it is sad to see someone going through that. I'm glad you liked my poem. Thank you for reviewing.

@Krista -- this is ripe for a sequel, probably a story.  The sequel could deal with a change in the controlling person to where they become supportive, caring, and help rekindle the dying sparks and embers which are almost dead.  It can happen.  I've seen the controlling and the reawakening.

Great poetry.

10 hours ago, ReaderPaul said:

@Krista -- this is ripe for a sequel, probably a story.  The sequel could deal with a change in the controlling person to where they become supportive, caring, and help rekindle the dying sparks and embers which are almost dead.  It can happen.  I've seen the controlling and the reawakening.

Great poetry.

I've seen it in hindsight thinking after the relationship dissolved into nothing. I struggle with poetry. It is an interesting concept. In the perspective of someone who knows they've done someone wrong, irreparable damage really, because that's what it is. People don't get that time back, those feelings magically lifted, there was once a time in that person's life when they were wronged so deeply that it 'changed' them for a time, if not forever. So, writing from that perspective, interesting. I don't know that I could do it justice. 

I also meant to thank you and @Bill W for taking the time to review the poem. It was a nice surprise for me.  

Edited March 6 by Krista