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- 07/28/2019
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Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
Storms - 41. Intermission: Stephen
‘Isn’t there anything we can do?’ Lewis was on the phone with Social Services again. Stephen sat at the kitchen table, listening to his end of the conversation. ‘I see. But—No, I realise that.’
‘Put them on speaker,’ said Stephen, and Lewis relented with a sigh.
Amanda’s voice came over the line. ‘You two would make a wonderful family for him. Mr. and Mrs. Hartman have a claim of sorts, though, as blood relations. But we’re not just sending him up there to stay forever, all right?’
‘What if he hates it there?’ said Stephen.
‘Then we’ll take it from there. And we’ll talk to Dr. Garcia when she’s back at work next week. She can give a recommendation as well. She knows Daniel, knows what he’s been going through. Uprooting him—’ She cut herself off. ‘Sorry, I’m not supposed to express an opinion on this.’
Lewis nodded. ‘Thank you, Amanda.’
‘We’re having a team meeting in an hour to discuss this and look at the paperwork. And like I said, John will drop by this afternoon, for a chat with you all about what happens next.’
‘All right,’ said Lewis. ‘Thank you.’
‘I should go,’ she said. ‘I’ll talk to you both later.’
‘Yeah,’ said Stephen. ‘Thanks.’
They bid each other goodbye and Lewis hung up.
‘So much for trying to adopt him,’ said Stephen, shaking his head.
Lewis put his hand on the back of Stephen’s neck, massaging it slowly. ‘It’s not over yet. We’ll see what John has to say.’ He kissed his husband. ‘It will be okay. I promise.’
* * *
Stephen sat quietly, not trusting himself to speak. If he did, he thought he might cry with relief. John had just informed them that Daniel would not be going away permanently.
‘We do have to make an evaluation, though, and in order to do that you need to spend time with them,’ John was saying to Daniel. ‘We propose that you go see them for two weeks to start with and then come back here for a couple of weeks. Then another two weeks there. A social worker has been to talk to your grandparents and look at their house today, and they’ve agreed to this.’ He paused, studying Daniel’s face. ‘It doesn’t have to be now. We can hold off for a bit, there’s no rush.’
Daniel sighed. He glanced at Stephen and then Lewis. Then he looked at John again. ‘May as well do it now,’ he said. ‘I’ll just . . . I’ll just be walking around with anxiety until I go either way.’
John smiled. ‘Fair enough. Do you feel okay about this? Aside from the anxiety, I mean?’
Daniel shrugged. ‘Doesn’t matter what I feel, does it? They’re not just gonna give up.’
Finally, Stephen couldn’t stop himself from speaking. ‘It does matter what you feel, Danny. This is your life. And if you want to stay here with us—’ He cut himself off. It wasn’t fair to influence him too much. But still, he felt he had to say, ‘We’d like you to stay. If you want to.’
‘I . . .’ Daniel looked distressed now. ‘I don’t want to make trouble for you guys, I don’t want to be a . . . a burden.’
Lewis sighed. ‘You’re not, Daniel. The only thing that matters to us is that you’re happy.’
‘I want you to be happy, too,’ Daniel mumbled, and Stephen’s heart very nearly broke. He wanted to tell him to stay, then, that that would make them happy, but Lewis gave him a look as if he knew exactly what Stephen wanted to say, and he stayed silent.
‘What’s important,’ said John, ‘is that we find a living arrangement that’s beneficial to you and works for everyone. Of course, it’s felt that it would be best if that could be with your family—your blood relations, I mean—but this concerns your wellbeing, Daniel. It’s about what’s right for you.’
Daniel nodded but said nothing.
‘So,’ John continued, ‘you would like to go ahead and go to Dudley on Monday?’
‘Yes,’ said Daniel. ‘No point in, like, delaying the inevitable or whatever.’
‘Right. Then we will contact your grandparents and let them know they can come pick you up as planned.’
‘There’s no need,’ said Lewis. ‘We would like to take him to Dudley. Right, Stephen?’
Stephen looked up at that. They hadn’t discussed this, but he trusted Lewis. ‘Right,’ he said. ‘Yeah, definitely. If it’s all right.’
‘It is,’ said Lewis before John could speak.
‘Quite,’ said John. ‘I’m sure Mr. and Mrs. Hartman will be happy not to have to make the long trip.’
‘I could just go by coach,’ said Daniel.
‘No,’ said Lewis, smiling kindly at him. ‘I won’t hear of it. We’re taking you there and that’s final.’
Daniel nodded. ‘Okay. Thank you, Lewis.’
* * *
They set off for Dudley at nine o’clock Monday. It was a grey, chilly morning, though most of the snow they’d had over Christmas was already melting. Lewis drove, while Stephen sat in the backseat with Daniel. They didn’t talk all that much, just occasional hushed conversation. Lewis made observations about the countryside as they passed by.
‘It’ll be okay,’ said Stephen when they were getting close. He knew he was saying it as much for his own benefit as for Daniel’s. ‘You’ll be fine. They . . . they’re your family.’
‘Yeah,’ said Daniel, nodding. ‘It’ll be fine. I’m sure they’re nice people. I just . . .’ He shook his head. ‘I dunno. You . . .’ He seemed to hesitate. Then he sighed. ‘You’re my family, too.’ He looked away, clearly embarrassed.
Stephen closed his eyes and cleared his throat. He felt like he might cry. He couldn’t do that, not in front of Daniel. He had to be strong for him. Instead, he reached across the middle seat and took his hand, squeezing it in his own. ‘You’re the bravest kid I’ve ever known, Daniel. You can handle anything. Okay?’
They pulled up outside the address they had been given. It was a small, red brick house with a neat little front garden. The front door opened before they had even gotten out of the car and Mrs. Hartman strode towards them. Lewis got Daniel’s suitcase out of the back. It contained some clothes, his laptop, that old DVD boxset of his, and a couple of the books that he had accumulated in the brief time he had spent with them.
‘Good to see you again, Mrs. Hartman,’ said Lewis. Stephen wondered how he was able to lie like that so easily. He hated seeing her stern face, and he was sure his husband did too. Still, they both shook her hand.
‘I trust the drive was all right. Would you like to come inside?’ It was clear from her icy tone that the question was only a formality.
‘No thank you. We had best get back, I have a design job I need to work on. Thank you for offering, though.’ Lewis smiled.
‘All right. Come along, then, Daniel.’ She gestured towards the house.
Daniel turned to them both. His eyes were wet. ‘Thank you,’ he said. It came out in barely more than a whisper. He hugged Lewis. ‘I’ll miss you.’
‘We’ll miss you, too,’ Lewis murmured.
Then Daniel turned to Stephen, and it was all Stephen could do to hold back the tears as he pulled the boy he had come to think of as practically a son in the month and a bit he had spent in their house into a tight embrace. ‘Goodbye, Danny,’ he said softly.
Daniel began to shake in his arms, quiet sobs escaping him. ‘I’ll be home soon,’ he said, so quietly that Stephen was sure Mrs. Hartman couldn’t hear him. ‘I’ll see you in two weeks.’ He had said ‘home’. Stephen squeezed him tighter, needing to hold him for just a moment longer, knowing that there was no guarantee of how many more times he would get to do so.
They said goodbye, Daniel picked up his suitcase, and Stephen and Lewis stood by the car, watching him walk inside the house behind his grandmother. Just before the door closed, Daniel turned to look at them, and the look on his face was so miserable and stricken that it hurt Stephen’s heart to see it.
Stephen got into the car on the driver’s side and Lewis sat in the passenger seat. As soon as the doors were shut, Stephen lost it. He hit the steering wheel hard. ‘Fuck!’
‘Stephen . . .’ Lewis for once didn’t tell him off for swearing. Instead, he stroked Stephen’s back. ‘It’s okay, babe.’
‘It’s not okay! How could it ever be fucking okay?’ The tears came before he knew what hit him and he closed his eyes, drawing a deep, shuddering breath. ‘God, I . . . I love that kid.’
‘Yeah. Me too. He’s easy to love.’
‘I wanted to be his dad.’
‘So did I. And . . . maybe we still can be. Either way, let’s be grateful for the time we get, eh?’
Stephen shook his head. ‘I don’t know how to do that right now.’
‘That’s okay. It’s all okay. Come on, get out of the car. I’m driving.’
‘No, I can drive.’
‘Stephen.’ Lewis’s voice was firm and commanding, and he placed his hand on the back of Stephen’s neck, squeezing gently. ‘I’m driving. I’m taking us home, and then we’ll have a bath and a glass of wine. And another talk about your potty mouth.’ He smiled wryly. ‘Okay? Let me take care of you.’
Stephen nodded. The promise of all that, as well as Lewis’s warm hand on the back of his neck, centred and calmed him. He looked his husband in the eye. ‘What would I do without you?’
‘What would I do without you?’ Lewis echoed. ‘I love you, Stephen.’
Stephen took a deep breath, then leaned over and kissed his husband. ‘I love you too.’
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Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
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