Toto - 4. Chapter 4

They rose once the morning sun was streaming through the fabric of their tents. After taking breakfast together, they struck the camp and began the hike along the ridge to the path back down the hill. Angelo was due to return to the construction site, while Gianni had arranged the morning off work to run some errands.

Angelo made a phone call as they descended the steep earthen path, and this time it was Anna who came to meet them. They didn’t have to wait for long at the top of the road before they saw her small white car approaching from around the corner. Once they had said goodbye to Gianni and Angelo, Toto and Claudia walked back down the steps with Alfredo by their side, and they parted company at the square with the fountain. Claudia was going to stay in town for the morning, and they agreed to meet up again a little later.

Gianni was still arranging the return of the camping gear to its rightful owners, so it fell to Toto to return to the apartment and feed the animals. When he opened the door, Ennio was already waiting for his meal, and approached him with much luxurious stretching of his furry legs and a deep purr rumbling in his chest.

In the quiet of the empty apartment, Toto showered with the bathroom door open and then went to his temporary bedroom. Looking around at his clothes strewn about the place, he gathered them up and began to pack his rucksack. He had a feeling that his time with Gianni and Angelo was coming to an end.

* * *

A short while later Toto, dressed in his last set of fresh clothes, made his way up to Via Roma and headed for the construction site, where he knew Claudia would be waiting. He found Claudia chatting to Anna outside the building.

“Ciao,” Claudia called as he approached.

Anna smiled. “You must be Toto,” she said. “It sounds like you all had a great time up on the mountain last night.”

“We did, thanks,” Toto replied politely.

“He does a good wolf howl, Anna,” Claudia said. “You should have heard him.”

Anna laughed. “Well, now I’m intrigued,” she said, “but I’ll leave you both to it.”

The young woman disappeared into the restaurant with a parting wave.

Toto and Claudia made their way companionably into town, taking the low route so that they passed the ceramics workshop and then walked under the roofless shell of an old stone palazzo as they approached the cathedral square. The morning coffee shift was in full swing at the bars and the cathedral doors were open, revealing the cool, shady-looking interior. In the tall pine trees framing the view across to Scala, the cicadas scraped raucously.

Their attention was soon caught by the unexpected arrival of Gianni, who was making his way down the avenue of oleanders that led into the square next to the corner of the cathedral, and they hastened over at once to greet him.

Gianni was walking arm in arm with a slightly stout older woman who looked to be in her early eighties. She was dressed in a traditional black dress and had a bushy head of long, greying hair. She stomped down each of the gentle stone steps very carefully, taking care not to trip. Gianni smiled as Toto and Claudia approached.

“Ciao, Marina,” Claudia said at once, and embraced the older woman quickly. Marina returned the hug with obvious pleasure.

“Ciao, Claudia,” she replied in a surprisingly rich and husky voice.

“Toto, you’ve met my grandmother?” Gianni asked. Toto nodded, and Gianni turned to the older woman. “And I think you know Toto, Nonna?” he asked.

“Of course,” she said. “I’ve been shopping at Salvatore’s for many years.” She turned to Toto. “But my goodness, Toto, you’ve grown.”

“Buongiorno, signora Bianchi,” Toto said dutifully.

“Such good manners,” Marina said approvingly. She looked Toto up and down, and then glanced over to Gianni, her mouth creasing in a smile. “Looking at him now, he really does remind me of you, the day I first met you.”

Gianni acknowledged this with a nod. Marina looked at Toto once more.

“Gianni has told me all about your problems with your father,” she said soberly, clutching a silver pendant about her neck that was shaped like a cross. “I’d like to try talking to him, if you don’t mind.”

“Thanks,” Toto said in surprise. “But I’m not sure he’ll want to listen. He…”

Marina silenced him by raising a hand and smiled once more. “I think he’ll listen to me.”

“Thank you, Nonna,” Gianni said, and he leant in to offer her quick, polite kiss. “I really appreciate this.”

Marina waved this away. “It’s my pleasure, caro.”

“I’ll see you in a little while,” Gianni said, and repaired to an outside table at one of the bars.

Marina set off along Via Roma at a determined hobble; Toto and Claudia followed at a distance. After a short while, she had reached the entrance to Salvatore’s store, where Toto’s father stepped out to greet her.

“Marina,” he said courteously.

“Buongiorno, Salvatore,” she replied. “I wonder if I could please speak with you for a while?”

Salvatore’s eyes flickered over Marina’s shoulder as he spotted Toto and Claudia watching from a corner in the street.

“Of course,” he nodded. Flicking the sign in the shop door from ‘open’ to ‘closed’, he locked up, led Marina to the entrance to the apartment and ushered her inside. The door closed behind them both with a ‘snap’.

Toto and Claudia exchanged a glance, and then returned wordlessly to the square. Exchanging a wave with Gianni, who was now settling into a coffee, they made their way to one of the benches under the pine trees and sat down together, looking back over the lively scene with its many couples and small groups of tourists.

“Do you think she’ll really be able to help?” Toto asked Claudia.

Claudia looked thoughtful. “I don’t know,” she replied. “I’m kinda surprised. When Gianni came out…”

“You mean when he made a shameful public display at Pietro and Anna’s wedding,” Toto prompted, at which Claudia nodded with half a smile.

“Yes, but Marina… she was one of the people who handled it the worst.”

“Oh,” Toto frowned.

“But then…”

“What?”

“Maybe Gianni’s right. Maybe what your Papà needs is to talk to someone who gets where he’s coming from.”

“Maybe.”

They mooched around the square for a while, looking idly at the displays outside the gift shops and occasionally stopping to chat to Gianni. Soon, almost an hour had passed since Marina had gone to speak with Toto’s father. Toto and Claudia had returned to the shade of the pine trees and now stood leaning on the top of the railings, looking out over the valley.

“So, what are you going to do about Michele?” Claudia asked after a while.

Toto glanced up at her. “I don’t know. I’m not sure how I feel about him now.”

“You still miss him,” she said.

Toto nodded, a little downcast. “Sure. He was my best friend for, like, ever.”

Claudia put an arm around Toto’s shoulders. He gave her waist a grateful squeeze in return.

* * *

“Toto! Hey – look!”

Claudia tore Toto’s attention back to the square and gestured in the direction of Via Roma. Marina had re-appeared in the corner of the square, supported this time by Salvatore; the two were still talking. Gianni was already rising from his seat at the bar.

Toto and Claudia hurried over to the corner once again, just in time to catch the end of their conversation.

“Don’t lose your son over this, Salvatore,” Marina was saying. “I made that mistake once with my daughter Francesca and, Lord help me, I almost did the same with Gianni. When I think about what almost happened that night…”

Salvatore put a pacifying hand on hers. “I understand what you’ve told me, Marina,” he said. He glanced up at Toto. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to talk to my son.”

Gianni ushered his grandmother to his table at the bar.

“Walk with me, if you will,” Salvatore said to Toto.

Warily, Toto nodded, and set off with his father in the direction of the railings. Claudia, who looked like she desperately wanted to follow, reluctantly went to sit down with the others.

The two of them stared out over the view together. Salvatore stood contemplatively with his hands behind his back.

“It seems I’ve been a little unkind to you, Toto,” he said.

Toto looked up at him, but said nothing.

“It hasn’t been easy since your mother died,” Salvatore continued stiffly. Toto, who knew that his father found it difficult to talk about his feelings, did not interrupt. “I have worked every hour that God has given me in the hope that you might, one day, lead a more normal family life.”

“I know, Papà,” Toto replied quietly.

“So I confess I was… disappointed, to see you behaving that way with Michele,” Salvatore added.

Toto looked at his feet miserably.

“However,” Salvatore continued, “Marina has helped me to realise that this is something that I cannot change. I may not like it, but this is who my son is.”

“I didn’t ask to be this way,” Toto said.

Salvatore’s tone softened a little. “I know that, Toto,” he replied. “I take it you are… quite sure?”

Toto looked up at his father. “Michele’s the only one I’ve ever felt this way about.”

“And does he…?”

Toto shook his head. “I guess not.”

Salvatore sighed, and shook his head. “The path you’ve chosen is not an easy one, Toto.”

Toto thought about Enzo and his goons. “I’ve already seen that,” he said. “And Claudia told me all about Gianni and Angelo. I still remember how you told me not to talk to them any more, years ago, after what happened at the wedding.”

Salvatore nodded. “That’s true.”

“But, Papà, I’ve spent time with Gianni and Angelo now and… they’re all right.”

Salvatore glanced warily at his son. “They didn’t do anything to you…?”

“No!” Toto said hotly. “All they’ve done is… be my friends.”

Salvatore raised a pacifying hand. “All right,” he said. “This is not my area of expertise.” He took a deep breath, and then exhaled slowly. “All I know how to do is run a shop.”

There stood in silence for a while. Toto watched his father, noticing how careworn he looked, seeing the crow’s feet around his eyes and the scattering of grey in his receding black hair.

“So what happens now?” Toto asked.

“I’d like you to come home, Toto,” Salvatore said, “if you think you could.”

Toto weighed the question, thinking of his small bedroom, his familiar things and routines. After a while, he nodded. “Yes, I think I could.”

Salvatore closed his eyes for a moment. It was not his father’s way to show his emotions, but Toto could tell he was pleased. “Very well,” he said. “And what of Michele?” he added after a while.

Toto shook his head. “I don’t know.”

The time seemed to have come to tell the others. Reaching this unspoken understanding together, they set off back across the square to rejoin the rest of the group. As they made their way across the sun-drenched paving stones, Toto noticed that Angelo had arrived as well, apparently anxious to hear the news. All four of them stood as Toto and his father approached.

Toto took a steadying breath. “I’m going home,” he announced.

Claudia smiled at once. Angelo gave a grunt of satisfaction, and Gianni beckoned to Toto with his arms. “That’s great news,” he said.

Unbidden, hot tears burst from Toto’s eyes, and he came forward to embrace the young man. “Thanks, Gianni,” he mumbled, “for everything.” Gianni hugged him back.

Angelo came forward to hug Toto too, and then Gianni turned to embrace his grandmother. It was a real hug this time, Toto saw, not at all like the polite kiss he had given her earlier.

“Thank you, Nonna,” Gianni said. “You made a real difference today.”

Marina said nothing, but Toto thought he saw a tear roll down one wrinkled cheek.

* * *

When everything was settled, they parted company. Salvatore returned to re-open the shop, while Toto set off for Gianni and Angelo’s apartment to retrieve his things. Claudia accompanied him as far as the construction site before pulling Toto into a rough hug of her own.

“Don’t be a stranger,” she said, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. “Arrivederci, pretty boy.”

Toto gave her a smile. “You know you like us the best.”

Claudia made a rude gesture, winked, and then disappeared inside.

It didn’t take long for Toto to collect his things; his earlier packing efforts had not been wasted. On the way out, he paused to say goodbye to the animals. Kneeling down by Alfredo’s bed, he received a slobbery kiss to the face for his trouble. Ennio, in his usual perch on the back of the sofa, purred and gave Toto’s outstretched hand a great deal of vigorous rubbing.

Toto let himself out, then chucked Gianni’s spare keys back in through the cat flap. Making his way back out into the sun-drenched surrounds of the square with the fountain, he turned for home.

* * *

Later that evening, Toto, dressed in a clean blue shirt and khaki shorts, hair brushed and freshened up, stood in front of the shrine at San Cosma. The golden rays of the setting sun cast a long shadow over the solitary figure as he stood at the base of the cliff. Having returned home and spent the afternoon helping his father in the shop, he had set out on his own for a walk, wanting to be alone with his thoughts. He wasn’t sure why he had ended up here.

After a while, Toto had the feeling he was being watched. He glanced over to the point where the piazzetta opened out onto the road, and saw a familiar figure standing there.

It was Michele, dressed in a shapeless red hooded jumper and an old pair of sports trousers. Realising that he had been spotted, he stepped tentatively towards Toto and stood a few feet away, hands in his pockets.

Michele seemed strangely diminished since the last time Toto had seen him. He looked a little pale, and there was a graze on his right cheekbone.

“Ciao, Toto,” he said quietly.

“Ciao,” Toto replied, looking the other boy up and down uncertainly. He wondered what other wounds he was concealing. “How are you?”

Michele shrugged and looked at the ground, kicking at the tarmac with a battered trainer.

“Ok, I guess,” Michele mumbled. It was plain to Toto that he didn’t want to talk about whatever had happened to him. For a moment his chest seemed to hitch, but then he brought himself under control.

“I really missed you,” Michele managed at length.

A new feeling, a kind of sad warmth, was spreading through Toto. He took a step towards the other boy.

“I missed you, too,” he replied. “So much…”

Michele looked anxiously up at him. Toto spread his arms to show there was no threat. “I know you don’t… you know… like I do,” he said; Michele shook his head, looking pained. “But… if you like,” Toto added hopefully, “we could still be friends.”

At this, Michele’s composure broke completely. He stepped forward and flung his arms around Toto, burying his face in Toto’s shoulder. After a moment, Toto realised Michele was crying.

Whatever had happened, it no longer mattered. Toto kissed his friend on the forehead and hugged him back, and, for a moment, all was silent.

-End-