Even Stars Die - 24. Chapter 24

I walk between the graves, my torch guiding the way, noting the names and dates and reading inscriptions on thick sheets of granite. It’s earie, walking amongst tombstones in the middle of the night. The light from my torch catches a silhouette. His hand rests on the headstone. His head bowed as if in prayer. His legs are slightly parted and he's wearing nothing more than a loose fitting white t-shirt, worn jeans and sandals. His face is wet from the rain. I hear his words, they resonate with passion as he emplores the Lord to take him now for his journey is done...

'I have submitted to your will and I have transgressed. I beseach you, free me from this world, from this sad place. I failed and I await your judgement, dear Lord. I failed in so many things that I am now so ashamed. I betrayed Keegs, and I interfered in the balance. When I stand before you, I will accept your judgement. I am prepared, oh Lord, to meet with you and if your will allows it, to be your servant..."

'Alex.' I whispered. My voice thick with emotion.

He spun about to face me. 'What? What are you doing here?'

'I've come from your parents who told me the most likely place I'd find you is at your grave. They really don't believe what is happening and neither do I. All i know is that I don't want you to go back to wherever it is, I want you to stay. Will you stay? Please, don't leave me alone.'

His entire body trembles. I reach out for him and pull him into a sincere embrace. This is the man I want to be with. I don't care that he's a ghost. In my arms his skin smells like jasmin. His thick neck is pulsing and his heartbeat...it's no longer there.

I panic, grab his wrist and feel it, the shaking has stopped, there is no pulse, yet he's standing there, staring into my eyes, with a wide smile on his face.

'I'll be going home in a few seconds. You are such a great guy. I'm honoured to have known you.'

I step into his space, the palms of my hands take his cheeks and pull him closer to me. 'Alex, I love you. I love you with all my heart and soul and I can't see a future without you. Please stay. I want you to stay. I will do anything and everything to make you change your mind. Don't make the wrong choice. Please, I'm begging you, stay with me. Please.'

His voice echoes in my brain. The information isn't good. 'If I stay, I won't remember anything. I'll be like a baby without teeth, without focus. I won't even know who I am.'

I glare into his eyes. 'We'll cross that bridge when we come to it, but I'm not leaving you, understand?'

'I will lose all of my powers. I'll be just as human as you,' he pauses, takes my face in hands. 'Keegs, you have been the only thing I can think about. You fill my head. Man, I see you in every empty space. Keegs, I have never said this to anyone, not even when I was alive, but now, I need you to know that I do need you. I do want you. I do want to come home to you and feel your body close to mine, touch you, really feel how your skin feels. I want to do all these things.'

I sigh, 'But'.

'There are no buts. Keegs I love you and I want to do all those things and more with you. Will you be prepared for my loss of memory?'

'I'm a great teacher.'

His lips meet mine and I eat at his mouth, grab him so tight that nothing and no one can separate us.

I don't remember how long we kissed. I know our mouths are wet and hungry for more. He suddenly goes limp in my arms and I place him gently on the grass beside the grave. He's cradled in my arms, his face a few inches from mine. He's not breathing. He's eyes are closed. There's a smile on his mouth. I touch his skin, it seems cooler than earlier. I touch his lips but they curl slowly back. I knew it was too good to be true. Happy endings are made in Hollywood movies. He's so still in my arms and I'm rocking him, and the rain is washing my tears away and the cold pain is returning to dull my mind.

Patrick’s hand touches my shoulder. ‘He’s at peace now.’

I nod. ‘I loved him so much, Pat.’ I whisper through the sobs. ‘Why did I believe he could come back?’

‘Just the same as we believe in other things, faith.’

The rain stops. A sudden peace descends over the cemetery, even the birds in the pine trees are silent. I’m sweating from the sudden blast of warm air around the grave site. I wipe his face with my handkerchief and bend down to kiss his eyes.

They suddenly open.

We stare at each other for several seconds before the inevitable sinks in. He won’t know where or who is.

* * *

I make him comfortable in his room. His mother appears now and then to ask how he’s doing. He slips in and out of delirium, speaking strange languages, he sweats a lot and I’m continually dabbing his face and forehead with cottonwool. His lips are moist, his hands warm.I check the time, it’s 23.58.Everyone is hushed around me.

Patrick has been silent all day, probably trying to make head or tails out of it all. My focus is on Alex.

I clutch his hand and whisper in his ear.‘I love you.’

The room suddenly smells like a chestnut.His parents step forward as he opens his eyes, and smiles at me.

‘Your name is Alex Meyer,’ my voice is trembling. ‘My name is Keegan Mansfield.’

‘Keegan…’

I rub the tears away with the back of my hand.

He begins again with a second chance to make something of his life. With me. We have made a life together and I have not told him that he was a ghost, that he was not human. That is another story.

We are all human.