Red Running Shoes - 11. Men trust their ears less than their eyes

Men trust their ears less than their eyes (Herodotus)

In Rick and Matteo’s backyard again

My hands ran over the sun-warmed tabletop, blindly following rough lines forged into the wood by wind and rain. The crooked branches of the old olive tree above me creaked. The laptop was open and ready, cursor blinking at the right spot; everything was waiting for me to finish. But I couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t.

I could hear the clinking of dishes back in the kitchen. They were preparing the food for lunch. A child was laughing, probably in the parking lot. Somewhere down the street a car horn honked. I was close enough to the beach to smell the sea, and felt the light breeze drying the tears I hadn’t realized were running down my face.

Fuck!

I could see his smiling face, I could feel his hand wrapped around my waist possessively, his chin on my shoulder while he whispered 'I love you'…

Shit!

A glass with iced water appeared beside my arm. Matteo.

His large hand felt warm on my shoulder. "You'll feel better eventually, Jo. Finishing this will be the first step on your way to getting past this. It hurts, I can see that, but you have to face what happened and own it, to be able to heal. We're here for you Jonah; you're not alone, don't forget that." Then he went back to his kitchen.

Matteo was right, I knew that. So, with shaking hands, I started to type…

***

All right Zach… Last year – fast-forward.

You know how it started: with the perfect weekend. Now I’m going to tell you the rest.

We did all the stuff you think you have to do when you’re newly together: We went to the movies, had romantic dinners, and picnics at the park. We visited museums and galleries, took long walks, rode my bike as fast as it goes, went for a run in the evenings, played soccer with our friends on the weekends, went clubbing until the wee hours of the morning, and the nights, aww the nights…

But after a hectic three months we learned how to take it slow: To just be at home, eat something, sit on the sofa, watch a movie or a game, talk about our day, or even to just do our own thing. Together.

Ren had to travel a lot. I always suspected his father was behind this. I wasn’t exactly the type he wanted for his son and heir and there was still Anne-Catherine. But I got to pick him up from the airport or the station and there is some truth in the saying ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’.

You might want to know about Eric, Zach. Well, he wasn’t an issue anymore. After what he did not only to me, but also to Chris and Ren and God knows who else, I pretended he didn’t exist anymore. On occasion, I heard his name. Friends or acquaintances mentioned him, but I blanked it out. I knew Ren was still in contact with him. I was sure he even met him sometimes, but Ren knew I didn't want to hear about that. I didn’t want to discuss it with Ren either. Whatever Eric was doing, if he had a new lover, or was trolling the bars again, I didn't care, so we didn't talk about it.

Of course, we had fights too.

I remember this one time when Ren’s phone rang, he looked at the screen and then left the room.

When he came back I said jokingly, “You know this is classic cheating behavior.”

“What?”

“The phone rings, you look at the screen and leave the room to take the call. Was that your lover on the side?” I grinned.

“This isn’t funny, Jonah. It was a business call and I left the room because the game is on and I thought you wouldn’t appreciate it, if I’d muted it.” He gulped down his drink and put the glass on the coffee table so hard, I almost wanted to look for the dent in the wood.

I rolled my eyes. “It was a joke Ren, nothing more.” Why did I have the feeling he was lying? Well not exactly lying, more like hiding something. I guess I was just paranoid after the stuff with Eric.

“Well, I don’t like being called a cheater, even as a joke.”

The mood was a little tense after that, but in the end we made up. In our own special all-forgiving way…

***

Some weeks later our six-month anniversary came up. We didn’t want to do the dinner-at-a-fancy-restaurant thing, but rather we wanted to be alone, just us. So we went on a hiking tour in the mountains. By nightfall, when we finally reached a quiet place near a little creek Ren knew, I was sweaty and exhausted. My feet burned and I had a fat blister on my left heel. I was ready to doubt the wisdom of our idea, when Ren suggested skinny-dipping in the creek. God, the water was so freezing cold, but then it felt good, invigorating actually, after I was wrapped up in a blanket and holding a hot tea in my hands.

We had a tent, which Ren pitched, thank God, because I suck at those things. I didn’t want to stand around watching him work, so I went searching for some firewood. Later in the evening, in front of a nice crackling fire, we were comfortably in each other's arms, drinking red wine from crystal glasses – because Ren's such a snob sometimes – and I pointed out my favorite constellations. By then I was sure it had been a wonderful idea to come out here for our anniversary. Suddenly Ren took my right hand into his. Seemingly out of nowhere he produced a silver ring and slid it on my middle finger. It fitted perfectly. "Happy six-month anniversary, love."

I could only stare at my hand. The ring had a Japanese character engraved on one side, embedded on the opposite was a black stone.

"It's my name, and er…the black stone stands for the color of my eyes. You always said I had onyx eyes," he said a little insecure.

Never had I expected he’d give me a ring. After six months. “I-it's perfect.” I grabbed his right hand and kissed his bare middle finger. “I have to get one for you. With my name--"

He pressed a small black satin bag into my hand. "Open it."

I found an almost identical ring, only the character was different. When I looked up, he said, "It means your name." And the stone was a deep violet instead of black. "When we make love, your eyes always become this color."

I put the ring on his middle finger with trembling hands. A perfect night, followed by a nearly perfect six months.

***

On the morning of our one-year anniversary, a messenger brought a shiny red box decorated with a black velvet bow and one dark red rose. In the enclosed card, it said, written in red: Wear this tonight…

Before I knew it, I murmured, “This better not be lacy, red panties or something.” When I looked up, the girl winked at me before she accepted her tip. I swear she whistled ‘I’m sexy, I’m cute’ when she ran down the stairs.

Whatever I had expected, it was not the black silken scarf I found in the box.

A few hours later and more than a little nervous, I stood on Ren's porch, about to raise my hand and knock, when the door opened. Ren’s gaze was immediately on me, searching. Finally he gestured for me to turn on my own axis and chuckled when he saw what I had done with his scarf. “You couldn’t just wrap it around your neck, could you?”

“Nope. Too boring.”

Ren pulled me into his arms and kissed me deeply, before he looked into my eyes. "Do you trust me?"

I shrugged. "Sure."

He grabbed me by my shoulders. "No, Jonah, I have to make sure. Do you really trust me?"

"Yes."

"All right." He turned me around, pulled the scarf off my ponytail, and blindfolded me.

"Ren?" That wasn’t what I’d expected.

"You said you trusted me."

"I do."

He pressed his forehead against mine. "Don't worry, love. Nothing will happen to you. You can stop this any time. If I didn't earn your trust yet, I’ll just have to work harder. It won’t be your fault," he whispered in my ear.

Then he took my hand and led me up the stairs, through the second floor hallway until we reached a room, which I supposed was his bedroom. I knew I was right when the back of my legs hit the bed. He took both of my hands in his and said, "Sit down."

After I did, he removed my boots. "Scoot up and lay down on your back."

I admit I still felt a little bit uneasy, but I shuffled back until I was in the middle of the bed and tried to relax. This was Ren, my lover, and I trusted him.

Then I felt the mattress dipping beside me. Ren took my left arm and wrapped something around my wrist. The same happened with my other arm. I heard some rustling, and when I pulled, I couldn't move them anymore. Much.

Did he just tie me up?

"Ren?" I pictured myself lying there, blindfolded, wrists tied up, helpless, at his mercy. Do I really trust him?

I did. It was relieving. I wasn’t afraid. I knew he would let me go any time I wanted. He wouldn't betray me, hurt me. The tension flew out of me.

As if he’d read my thoughts, he said, "I would never hurt you Jonah, you know that." His finger traced my eyebrows, my jaw, my lips, and then his tongue flicked the side of my mouth. I parted my lips for him.

The blindfold enhanced my other senses. I had read about this, but I was still amazed it was true. I could hear his slightest panting, smell his unique scent, and feel the lightest of his touches as if everything was amplified.

His hands on my shoulders. He caressed me through the fabric of my shirt, undoing one button after the other while his mouth wandered over my chest. When he reached my nipples, he sucked first at one, then at the other, biting down hard only to lap soothingly over it directly afterwards.

He stopped on his way down, his tongue teasing my navel. I arched my back. Onwards to the waistband of my pants, kissing, and sucking at my skin.

I felt exposed and secure at the same time; it was almost bizarre.

Then he lay on top of me, nipping at my lips, licking at my jaw and neck, and I could feel his hot skin rubbing against mine.

He was naked. When did this happen? I guess my enhanced senses were easily distracted.

Finally he opened the fly of my pants. "No underwear again, eh? Bad Jonah." He tugged them down in one single move.

I imagined him sitting there between my legs, naked, his hungry eyes on me. I didn’t feel exposed, I felt desired.

I wanted to see him so badly.

His fingers trailed down the inside of my thighs and he kissed both my knees. I writhed under his light, teasing touches.

"So impatient."

Finally he cupped me with one hand, took the base of my shaft with his other hand and ran his tongue along the underside. He knew me so well. Heaven. But then he stopped.

"Ren?"

"Do you remember what you wanted to do during our first weekend but you didn’t have the courage to tell me?"

Oh shit!

And then I felt his naked body on top of me. He reached for the blindfold and took it away.

"For this my love, I have to see your eyes." Next he released my wrists. "And I want to feel your hands on me."

I blinked, even though it wasn't too bright in the room; the light came from a few candles sitting all over the room.

I was a bit startled when he grabbed my straining erection, rubbed some lube onto it, and then positioned himself above me. He locked his eyes with mine. "I've never done this before…" And with that he let himself slowly sink down. I gasped and grabbed his hips to stop him.

"No, Ren stop. You can’t…"

But he didn't stop. “I took care of this, don't worry, love."

I can't describe this feeling; it was unbelievable. To see him on top of me, first slowly moving up and down, his eyes riveted on mine, his lips slightly parted, panting, his hard, leaking shaft in his hand, he was so beautiful, so hot and all mine. No one in this whole world ever made me feel as Ren did that evening.

And nobody ever will.

I knew I had tears in my eyes afterwards, which I tried to hide by nuzzling my face in the crook of his neck.

Much later, after we showered and dressed again, Ren led me to his dining room where he'd already set up a fucking first-class candlelit dinner. I couldn't believe my eyes. The plates, the silverware, the crystal wine glasses, the silver chandeliers…everything perfectly arranged on the plain, black wooden table.

He even pulled the chair out for me. When I sat down I noticed a small black box on my plate. I looked at him questioningly and he nodded, giving me the okay to open it.

Inside I found a key with a red velvet bow on it.

"This is a key to my house. I love you, Jonah and I want to wake up beside you every morning. Please move in with me."

I clasped my hand around the key, a tear running down my face. Yes. I wanted to try that again, I wasn't afraid anymore.

***

A few days later, I had to go on a business trip with Alec. He had invited me to come along with him to a book fair, where he presented his latest publication. It was a large five-day event, which included a dinner party and a sightseeing tour. I didn’t want to go, but Alec convinced me it was a good way to make new contacts so I finally gave in.

I also used the opportunity to get a nipple ring. Yeah, ouch, I know. It was my present to Ren for his birthday. I knew he would love it since we visited a photo exhibition and saw a close-up of a guy wearing a nipple ring with a drop-shaped diamond dangling from it. I had involuntarily flinched, but Ren had been fascinated. “You would look stunning with a piece of jewelry like that."

Three days into the book fair, I sat in my hotel room bored to death, rubbing some ointment on my hurting nipple all the while contemplating if it was really such a good idea sticking a piece of metal through me, when Chris called.

Apparently our friends were planning a surprise birthday party for Ren and Chris wanted my opinion. "There’s this new restaurant everyone is raving about and Aurel wants to try it out, but I convinced him we better ask you first. You know Ren the best, and if we let Aurel do the planning all by himself, we’ll end up with two hundred people Ren doesn’t know and doesn’t care about having around for his birthday."

I was so glad he’d called me. Aurel just couldn’t do small and Ren hated big parties. “Whatever you do, it has to be small, just close friends.”

“That’s what I thought. Is there a chance you could come home early and help reign in Aurel?”

I happily agreed to leave two days early.

The new restaurant was great. It had a glass ceiling, and they had these huge potted palm trees, which separated the room so you could only see a few other tables. It was very intimate almost as if one was dining in their own private winter garden. I loved it. If we decided to celebrate Ren's party here, we could use the terrace, down by the restaurant's own lake. We had to take a look first, but it sounded perfect.

The only question left was whether they could cook. After studying the menu, we decided to share as many different dishes as possible to try them out. I started with a light tomato soup and Chris had a plate of mixed antipasti for starters.

Just when I was dipping my spoon into the soup, Chris stopped talking, and gaped with wide eyes at something behind me.

It was too funny. "Chris? What's up? Chris! Is Don Vito Corleone coming up to our table with a violin case in his hand?" But Chris didn't laugh back; instead, he put his cutlery down, took both of my hands into his and said with an unnaturally calm voice, "Jonah, please, don't turn around for a moment, will you? Please."

"What?" Of course I had to turn around, and then I stopped breathing. Eric and Ren just entered the restaurant with Eric hanging on Ren’s arm. A hostess led them to their table, where they sat down. Eric immediately took Ren's hands and laid the palm against his cheek.

When the waiter came to take their drinking orders he let go reluctantly, but as soon as he went away, Eric grabbed Ren's hands again and they locked eyes. We couldn’t hear what they were saying. Eric played with Ren's ring – my ring - obviously saying something very funny, as they started to laugh right after.

I was frozen in place. I wanted to close my eyes, but I couldn’t. It became more and more difficult for me to breathe. I pushed one hand in the pocket of my jacket where I bumped against cold - Ren's key. I had carried it around as my lucky charm ever since our one-year anniversary. I pulled my hand back as if I had touched burning embers.

When I saw Ren brushing a strand of Eric's hair behind his ear, like he'd done with me on so many occasions, I couldn't stand it any longer. I had to get out of there. Run out as fast as I could. I got up, but Chris held me back. He beckoned our waiter over and asked him something quietly. I didn’t even try to listen. I was too out of it. After a short heated discussion, the waiter led us towards the kitchen, where he pointed at a small door at the back.

As soon as the swinging doors closed behind me, I could breathe a little better. Shoving my hands into my jacket pockets, I felt the damned key again. Slowly I pulled it out of its red velvet bow and looked at it. I knew what I had to do.

I turned to our waiter. "Tyler, do you remember those two guys at the table beside the window?"

"The one with your cheating boyfriend?"

I snapped my gaze back at Chris. He shrugged apologetically. "I had to explain why we had to leave through the kitchen."

I closed my eyes. "Yes, the one with my cheating ex-boyfriends. Could you give this,” I showed him the key, “to the one with the black hair?"

Tyler grabbed the key. "Sure thing. I can't stand cheating scumbags either. I've had enough of that myself." He put the blasted key on a tray and winking, put a white cloth over it. “Surprise.”

Chris gave him a large tip. "As soon as we leave the restaurant, say in five minutes, you give him the key. If he asks you how you got it, you can tell him from a guy who just left. Don't tell him anything else. Can I rely on you, however large his tip might be, that you won’t tell him anything else?"

“I would empty a bowl of hot soup over his head, if I didn’t need my job so badly.”

Like a lost puppy, I followed Chris out of the back entrance of the kitchen, over a yard to his car. When my phone rang I turned it off without looking. It was Ren's ring tone.

I was numb, paralyzed. It felt as if I was out of my body, watching myself sitting beside Chris, staring out the window with unseeing eyes.

Why? Why did this keep happening to me?

Then suddenly it started to hurt. I mean really hurt, like I was physically injured. I read somewhere ‘it felt like something was ripping me apart’ and I had scoffed at the author. Not anymore.

I was a trembling mess. Chris had to drag me out of the car, half-carrying me into his house. As soon as we were through the door I stumbled to the bathroom, sank down in front of the toilet, and proceeded to throw up everything I'd ever eaten, at least it felt like that. Chris sat patiently beside me the whole time, holding my hair back, tracing soothing patterns on my back. After some more retching, my stomach was finally empty. As was I.

Chris wiped my face with a cool cloth, and gave me a glass of water to rinse my mouth.

That Tuesday evening I gave up on trust. Never, never again in my life.

Chris undressed me. I let him handle me like I were a lifeless puppet. My clothes were a mess. He went with me into the shower, without undressing. I don't remember much, but somehow he managed to wash me, dry towel me and steer me to the guestroom.

He settled me down on the bed and covered me with a blanket. When he came back, he wore dry clothes and had a glass of water and some pills in his hand. I swallowed them without asking what they were. I couldn't care less.

Then he turned me on my stomach, pulled the covers down to my hips and gave me a massage. I fell asleep with the scent of lavender oil; the pills were kicking in fast.

I woke up to loud shouting. "Don't you dare come over, you fucker! After seeing you and that scumbag all lovey-dovey, he had a mental breakdown, a real fucking mental breakdown!-….-He's sleeping now, I had to give him a sedative…You come fucking near him ever again and I’ll call the police…I was there asshole, I saw you…Go to hell!"

A few moments later the bedroom door opened. When Chris saw I was awake, he sat down beside me. "Hey, did I wake you? Sorry, for the yelling, I just…never mind. So how are you feeling?"

"Who was that? Ren?"

"Yeah."

I wanted to ask why he had called, but then I realized I didn’t want to know. I didn’t want to think about him. I didn’t want to remember. "What time is it?"

"Almost ten in the morning.” He gave me a glass of water. “What do you want for breakfast?"

"Nothing, thanks. I'm not hungry." Food, the thought alone…

"Come on, have at least a cup of chamomile tea. It’ll help soothe your stomach."

I knew he wouldn’t stop so I gave in. " 'kay."

"Sit with me in the kitchen and I’ll make your tea."

So while he was putting the kettle on, I sat at the table, my head in my hands. "I trusted him. He said he loved me. He… both said they loved me, funny, eh?"

"Jonah…"

"So what is wrong with me? What… After our anniversary, I thought… What did I do?"

"You did nothing. You're a kind and loving person. You're gorgeous and compassionate; a guy who actually listens to others. Maybe you're a little crazy, but in a nice way. I really can't imagine why any guy would cheat on you. They're both fuckin' cheatin' idiot assholes, that's what they are!"

I shook my head. "No, it has to be my fault. It has to be me. Once okay, but twice? It has to be me…"

Chris put the mug with the tea on the table. "Jonah, don't go there. I’ve known you since we went to school. We would go on vacation together for weeks, we even slept in a too-small tent without killing each other. If there were something wrong with you, I would know, believe me.” He pulled a chair around from the other side of the table and sat down beside me. “Maybe they, I don't know, planned this or had some stupid macho bet going."

I shook my head. "Why would they do this?"

"You'd never know with those hormonally hijacked super machos."

"I trusted him. I…I…oh God…" My throat tightened; I felt like I was suffocating all over again.

Chris patted my back soothingly. "Jonah, you need to calm down. Come on, drink some tea, but be careful; it's still hot."

"Thanks." I folded my hands around the mug, trying to breathe calm and even again. I wanted to go home. Then I remembered I didn’t really have a home anymore. I had packed up my apartment before I went to the book fair and Ren had promised to take care of getting my belongings to his house. I had pushed away any thought that I was about to move in with Ren. Now it came rushing back to me. “Oh my God, what am I going to do?”

“What do you mean?”

“My apartment. I sublet it to my landlord’s nephew.”

"Well, you can stay with me for a while; I really don't mind.”

“Shit!” I needed to get away. Everything was closing in on me.

“Maybe you can talk to your landlord, explain everything to him. He seemed to be nice.” Chris frowned. “Ren will come here eventually; he made that very clear when I had him on the phone. He wants to talk to you."

"I know." I needed to get out.

"You could always stay and confront him, you know. Yell at him, beat him, or send him to hell with this cold attitude of yours you sometimes have."

"No, I couldn't do that. I-I just couldn't… see him. Oh God, I’m so embarrassed… They played me; it was all a set up."

“You don’t know that.”

I had all these schemes in my head. I couldn’t decide what to believe. Everything was possible. But I knew one thing for sure. Ren had betrayed me.

Writing this today I’m not proud of it, but I was a mess. After the talk with Chris I went back to the guestroom. I didn't recognize much of what was happening around me. At one time the doorbell rang and then there was more shouting, someone knocked on the door violently, but for me it was still all a blur.

The next thing I clearly remember was Chris sitting beside me on the bed again. "Hey Jonah, how do you feel?"

"I don't know… What time is it?"

"Three pm. Do you want something to eat or drink?"

"Water?"

"Sure. Do you feel like coming with me to the living room? Michael is here…"

Michael?

"Oh… yes, give me a moment. I think I look like fuck."

"Well... Maybe you want to go to the bathroom first."

When I came into the living room Michael and Chris were sitting on the sofa. I thought I'd seen Michael's hand on Chris's thigh…

I looked from one to the other. "Did I maybe miss something important?"

"Yeah …uhm…we've been together since last Friday. Well, it was supposed to be a surprise. I wanted to tell you last night, but…" Chris stuttered. He looked embarrassed.

I couldn’t allow that. "I'm happy for you two.” I took their hands in mine. “I really am. You're my best friends. I-I'm happy for you…"

"We weren't so sure how or even if we should pass on the news to you because of last night, and so…" Michael squeezed my hand.

I sat down in one of the love chairs. "I'm the idiot who is always cheated on. That has nothing to do with you guys. Something is wrong with me; that doesn't mean I can’t be happy for you."

Michael slapped my thigh, hard. “There is nothing wrong with you.”

Chris nodded. “I told him that already.”

I didn’t want to discuss this with them. They meant well, I knew that. I also knew that there had to be something wrong with me. Next time I fell in love, if that ever happened again, it would be under my conditions.

"So Jonah, what're you gonna do?" Michael asked.

I'll visit Rick and Matteo in Sicily."

"Your cousin Rick? The one who has that restaurant…” Chris frowned. “I forgot the name."

"La Bilancia, yeah. But I need to get some of my stuff. I have to go to the apartment--"

"Yeah, about that. We think you shouldn't go near your apartment. Actually, we've already kind of made a plan. Michael will get your stuff. You have to tell him what you need. Hopefully the boxes are still there and properly labelled. Maybe you should call the landlord though, just in case. Explain the situation; make him change the locks perhaps. At the same time I'll try to meet up with Ren, this way we know he won't be at your apartment waiting for you."

"Yeah, and we have to do this very quickly, before Ren comes back and does God knows what and we really have to call the cops. Somehow he thinks he's being wrongfully accused here. Fucker!” I had never seen Michael this furious before.

"Chris, you can't meet Ren. I don't know what he'll do…" It was wrong to let Chris do that for me. The right thing would be for me to talk to Ren. I knew that, but the mere thought of sitting in front of him, seeing his face, made me feel nauseous. I was a coward.

"That's okay. I'll meet him at Bell's. I don’t think he would cause a scene in the middle of a café. At least not a big one… And I really want to know what he has to say.” Chris got up from the sofa. “I’ll call him from the kitchen. Give Michael your keys so he can get your stuff."

With Michael and Chris gone, I went to Chris's computer and browsed through the sites of travel agencies. I needed a flight to Catania, Sicily. It was easier than I had thought. The same night I would be on my way to Rick and Matteo’s. It seemed almost as if fate wanted me to be away from this place as fast as possible. Well, I couldn't agree more.

After booking the flight, I could have looked at my situation, but I didn’t do that. I didn't want to. I felt I had to separate from my soul, protect it behind a closed door, never to open it again. If I locked it away with as many locks as I could get, it couldn’t get hurt ever again. What a crazy idea was that. I actually pictured locks!

Finally, Michael came back with my large duffel bag and my laptop bag, successfully rescuing me from more of those pathetic, morose musings.

"I've got everything you wanted. As far as I can tell, everything is still there, the landlord told me he was waiting for the movers to come tomorrow morning. Apparently there was some delay; otherwise everything would have already been transported to Ren’s house.” Michael laughed. “Good thing you called him and told him I was coming, by the way. After I explained the situation some more to him, he immediately agreed to change the locks. I told him you were going on a longer vacation, maybe half a year or so. He asked me whether you might still want to sublease the apartment to his nephew. What do you think? You don’t have to pay the rent, and he would even give you some extra cash if he could use the furniture and the kitchen."

"I don't know…I booked a flight for 3:30 in the morning. I have no time to--"

"That won’t be problem. Chris and I will take care of your stuff. Just tell the landlord what you want. If there’s anything you have to sign, I’ll send it to you."

We were talking about what to do with the boxes, when Chris came back. He was seething.

"You better forget that fucker as fast as possible.” He paced around the kitchen table. “I thought that maybe…” He ran his hands through his hair. Then he closed his eyes, visibly collecting himself. “When Ren saw you weren’t with me, he leaned back in his chair and sneered that he already reckoned you wouldn't have the guts to confront him. That you sent me, because you probably already did a runner. I really tried to stay calm, Jonah. I asked him how long had this been going on between him and Eric. He only grinned and said that it never really stopped. I asked him how they could do this to you. If it was a stupid bet or something. All he said was 'Because we could.’ I had to get out of there, Jonah. As fast as possible, otherwise…"

***

Sitting in the cab on my way to the airport, I stared out of the window, playing with the ring on my right hand out of habit. Then I noticed what I was doing. His ring. I almost ripped it from my finger with every intention of throwing it out of the window.

At the end I just put it in the pocket of my pants. It might still be there.

The end.