Prophylaxis - 20. Chapter 20

content/trigger warnings: Bad tentacles touching the no-no place, sexual assault, claustrophobic situations, paralysis, freakiness underwater

I was still wrapped in the blanket, so my instinctive struggling was embarrassingly ineffective. It only took a moment to pass through the glass. It had turned strangely gelatinous, it was cool and resisted my body pushing through it into the water beyond. It gave with a tug and closed seamlessly behind me. When I was surrounded by cool water, Takashi’s arms let me go and retreated back through the soft glass. I had a random wondering of whether his arms would be wet when he pulled them free or if the glass somehow kept all the water inside.

That was just my mind spinning though, trying not to panic, because I was trapped in a box of water with what looked like Satan’s pet octopus and panicking seemed really fucking reasonable right then. I fought my arms free of the waterlogged blanket and reached for the glass I’d just passed through. It didn’t shimmer or move anymore, though, and my hands found nothing but a hard slick surface. Then I might have freaked out just a smidge.

My fists pounded the glass as I fought to keep holding my breath. I could see Takashi and Riley on the other side of the barrier, so fucking close, but I couldn’t get to them. Takashi was making little soothing motions with his hands, the universal motion for ‘calm down’. And I did, for about two seconds, and then thick black and gray tentacles began to fill my vision. In my panic, I seemed to completely forget that I’d agreed to this, that this was going to fix me up and make me better. My frontal cortex for reasoning and complex thought was no longer running the show, it was all amygdala now. My brainstem screaming danger in big fucking neon letters.

Because I’m an idiot I actually screamed, like a little girl, while underwater. Bubbles churned from my mouth even as the first long tentacle snagged me. I struggled against the blanket still wrapped around my lower half. Something covered my nose and mouth, not helping to calm me down at all. I grabbed it, trying to yank it off my face. The end over my nose and mouth was attached to a tentacle that was thinner than the rest. It was smooth, with no suckers. The tip that was touching me suddenly ballooned out slightly and I could feel air brushing my face. I sucked it in greedily, then coughed harshly. I stopped yanking on the tentacle attached to my face and just tried to breathe.

The air was cool and damp. It smelled fishy but left a sweet taste on my tongue. I traced my fingers around the appendage covering my nose and mouth. It was shaped much like a breathing mask; the edges went from the bridge of my nose down over my cheeks and stopped at my chin. With every exhale, bubbles trickled from a spot several inches from my face, venting my exhale somehow without letting water in. The seal at the edges of the part on my face wasn’t letting in water either.

I stopped actively struggling, but my heart still pounded in my chest and my eyes were wide, darting wildly even as the salt water burned them. I had a death grip on the tentacle that had attached itself to my face, like that would help at all. The arms of the Pyn Moordenaar seemed to be everywhere I looked, but no more of them reached for me. They moved idly, none still except for the few that had attached themselves to the wall to hold the Pyn Moordenaar in place. The only part of it touching me was the mask-like appendage on my face and a single tentacle around my middle, keeping me from sinking in the cool water.

It was anticlimactic, really.

I’d have said it was watching me and waiting, but I couldn’t find the eyes on the damned thing. I was still feeling freaked as hell, but not to the point of thrashing, screaming, and generally making a fool of myself. I did all I really could do, I held onto the tentacle in front of my face and breathed. The sweetness got stronger, and I didn’t think much of it until it started getting hard to keep my hold on the tentacle I was gripping.

My arms were too heavy, I let them go to float at my side. All of me felt languid and strange. I blinked slowly, stupidly.

The air was drugged.

My amygdala started yelling at me again, but my body couldn’t respond. All I could do was float and breathe. My eyes found Takashi. Riley was yanking at his arm, looking pissed. Takashi shook his head and said something that seemed to calm the sun-kissed fae. Riley peered in at me, eyes worried.

My attention was yanked from my companions when I saw motion. The Pyn Moordenaar must have decided I was doped up enough, because it wasn’t just chilling out anymore. Those fat black arms were reaching for me. My breathing sped up, which did nothing but suck more of that sweet air inside me, making it impossible to move my arms. I don’t know how the blanket had managed to stay around my lower half, but I couldn’t kick or fight as the creature carefully unwrapped me like a present. Blood stained the water and I had a ridiculous momentary fear of attracting sharks, as if this beast couldn’t tear a great white’s face off.

It was surprisingly gentle with me, though, as it touched me. It explored me with the tips of its tentacles, the small suckers almost tickling as they explored my skin. They paused everywhere I had an injury, large or small. I could feel the thick slime being smeared on every scrape or bruise. I think the goo was produced by the little suckers on the ends of the big arms. They traced every inch of me, even between my fingers and toes. At first the slime made the pain in the area flare, but then each hurt receded to a tingling buzz. The tentacles were smooth and rubbery, just slightly warmer than the water surrounding me.

Their touch seemed to linger longer at the letters burned into my chest, the goo coating the Pyn Moordenaar put there thicker than in other places. I closed my eyes, I didn’t want to watch anymore. I told my amygdala to shut up and calm the fuck down. This scary tentacle beast was treating me more gently than most humans in my life.

So, I tried to calm myself and was relatively successful until one of those tentacles slid between my ass cheeks. I’m not sure why I was so surprised, that area of my body was hurt the worst. Of course the pain taker would need to goo me there. My eyes flew open as a slime-covered tentacle found its way inside of me. I was surrounded by black and gray. The creature’s arms surrounded me. While I’d been carefully not looking, the Pyn Moordenaar had moved me closer. I could see the dark mass of its body. Two eyes the size of saucers were on each side of the body, pupil cutting horizontally across the murky gray iris. Both were tilted towards me, watching. Lower on the body was a place with fewer of the large tentacles. There was a mouth there, with a jet black beak like a parrot, bigger than both my fists put together. Surrounding the mouth was a nest of much smaller tentacles. They reminded me a little of the tentacles squid have that flair out into a wider diamond shape on the end.

I was so going to have nightmares after this.

I gasped as the tentacle pushed deeper, coating my insides with its slime. The pain was sharp at my asshole and throbbing in my guts. Thick black tentacles wrapped around me, holding me still so the one inside me could delve deeper. I felt it curling and moving, finding every tear and cut Lester’s brutality had inflicted. My mind went there again, the ragged plastic of the chewed up screwdriver handle was cutting me, the thick metal of the flashlight was ripping me open and tearing up my insides.

My breaths came in quick terrified pants, the sweetness in the cool humid air thick on my tongue. I think my hyperventilation made me take in too much of whatever drug was making my body loose and heavy. My head spun and my eyes had trouble tracking. Everywhere seemed to be black and gray octopus arms. I felt nauseated, and worried that if I threw up I would choke on it and die. What a lovely way to go. The muscles in my fingers and toes started to spasm and twitch even as that thick arm explored inside me.

I would never be able to watch Japanese tentacle porn ever again.

The slick arm inside me slowly pulled out. My hole twitched, full of the creature’s slime. Slowly my breathing returned to normal and I realized the Pyn Moordenaar was holding me closer, gently rubbing its long arms up and down my back and arms. I couldn’t be sure, but it felt like it was trying to soothe me. Maybe I was just putting my own interpretation on it, but my empathy seemed to be flickering back to life now that my pain wasn’t so all-consuming and I felt the brush of concern coming from the pain taker. I didn’t know why its gentleness and worry for my well-being surprised me. I knew it was a sentient creature capable of communication and even bargaining. Shame burned in my chest that I’d judged this being more as an animal just because it looked so different from myself. If I’d been able to move, I’d have patted one of the tentacles apologetically. I didn’t want to be some kind of cephalopod bigot.

When my breathing no longer hitching in my throat and the strange tingling left my extremities, the Pyn Moordenaar stopped petting me and just held me steady with its strong dark arms. The smaller tentacles stretched out slowly, tentatively. I got the sense the being was trying not to startle me. I remembered what Takashi had said and tried to relax. The larger tips slid over where the slime coated my skin. Every once in a while a tentacle would retreat back to that sharp black beak and deposit the collected goo into the Pyn Moordenaar’s mouth. The beak opened and closed, swallowing the stuff down. After a few minutes the horizontal pupils of those huge eyes began to dilate and a giddy euphoria emanated from the pain thief into me everywhere a tentacle held me or brushed my skin. Riley was right. The Pyn Moordenaar was getting fucking high.

I giggled into the tentacle masking my mouth. My pain was gone. Nothing hurt. I felt amazing, but I also had nothing to shield me from the minds around me. My thoughts were dominated by the Pyn Moordenaar… its name was Swartbek. The name floated through my head. He’d been named after how lovely his beak was, dark and shining like obsidian. He was a little vain about it, keeping it sharp and gleaming.

He liked me, not only because my pain was tasty, and it was. I was small, pale, soft… something to be protected. Swartbek didn’t think Takashi deserved me if he couldn’t keep me safe from such injuries. Riley had been half right, the Pyn Moordenaar did sometimes steal fae away. However, they didn’t keep them just to hurt them and steal their pain. They kept ones they felt couldn’t be allowed to continue living in the unsafe environment that left them so hurt they turned to the Pyn Moordenaar for healing. The pain takers would bring those fae to a secret place and keep them safe, fed, clean, sedated, and happy. It was only fair that those that were cared for also gave the Pyn Moordenaar a little pain to consume. Just a little, given as compensation.

I shook my head, the tentacle covering my face following the movement as I pulled out of Swartbek’s mind. This was more than reading emotions and catching fleeting images from a person. I could sift through the Pyn Moordenaar’s mind, following his thoughts like meandering streams. It was too easy.

When the pain taker’s high started to really hit him I was swept along. I blinked dazedly, my head feeling too large for my neck and filled with static. I giggled as tingles went through me, seeming to linger in my chest. It was kind of like the buzz I got from really amazing weed.

The smaller tentacles collected the last of the slime from my body. I huffed a little sigh of relief, thinking I was nearly done. I was starting to feel overwhelmed with the Pyn Moordenaar’s euphoria that seemed to keep increasing.

I forgot about one part of my body that still was… gooey.

I gasped as the first small tentacle stroked against my ass. I wanted to struggle, at least clench my buns a little, but I couldn’t. I was still drugged with whatever was in the air Swartbek was giving me. I was also high as a fucking kite. As one and then another thin tentacle twined into me I could only mewl, knowing any noise I made would be muffled by the water surrounding me. Useless.

I clenched my eyes closed, since I couldn’t clench anything else. I felt nauseated as more tentacles wriggled inside me. Each would enter me to find its prize to take back to that slick black beak to keep Swartbek’s euphoric buzz going. My mind was swirling right along with the pain taker’s. It felt like my head was trying to short circuit, but shit it felt good.

Then one of those tentacles rubbed against just the right spot inside me. I moaned and the tentacles stilled for a moment, then that damned squiddy appendage hit that sweet spot inside me again, on purpose this time. I felt the Pyn Moordenaar’s curiosity and amusement through my heroin-esque haze. I wanted to pull away but I couldn’t move. I had to take the pleasure without being able to even squirm, making the sensations that much more intense. My eyes fluttered open before I slammed them closed again when all I could see were thick black tentacles and those two large strange eyes.

I knew I was getting hard and tried to will it away, but no amount of imagining Queen Elizabeth naked or thinking of my Uncle Chuy showing off his appendectomy scar would make that wood go down. I knew what Swartbek was going to do even before I felt the cool smooth surface of one of the smaller tentacles wrapping around my dick. The little tentacle slid over the tip, finding precum that had been milked out by the tentacles inside me rubbing incessantly against my prostate. There must have been enough that it all hadn't been washed away in the water swirling around us. Swartbek pulled back that tentacle, holding that bit of my precum in the cup at the wider tip, until it reached the obsidian-beaked mouth. I was horrified as the Pyn Moordenaar tasted, and somehow worse, enjoyed my precum. He was curious and delighted, he wanted more.

I moaned as one of the larger tentacles wrapped around my cock. It tried to stroke up my length, but the rubbery flesh dragged on my skin, making me yelp. The Pyn Moordenaar was instantly contrite, long arms waving apologetically. The tentacle secreted more of the slime it had first put on all my wounds, now it slicked my cock so the pain taker’s black and gray tentacle could slide smoothly up and down my hardness. I was being jerked off and butt-fingered (Is it still called fingering if the one doing it has no fingers?) by a giant mutated squid high on pain goop.

This was my fucking life.

I felt my own forced pleasure and Swartbek’s amused curiosity fed by his high. I was trapped in my own body, I couldn’t do a damn thing to stop what was happening. A stronger person would likely have figured out a way to hold their breath until the gas wore off or something; a stronger person would have fought to the last.

I wasn’t a stronger person.

I admit I gave in. I tried to forget where I was and who or what was touching me. I was fucking blazed by the literal contact high, which made things easier. I fell into the pleasure and let it happen. I thought for a moment that Lester was right to burn that word into my chest. I was a fucking whore. I pushed that painful thought away as quickly as I could.

I let myself enjoy the rippling pressure in my ass, always rubbing persistently at my prostate and filling me without pain. I didn’t think about exactly what was filling me so carefully and pleasantly. Pretending it was a hand or mouth on my erection was much more difficult. My cock was being teased and stroked in a way I’d never been before. The flesh of the tentacle around my length was smooth and rubbery with suckers that could suction and release. When one of those round suckers found my cockhead I moaned roughly and my eyes rolled back behind my closed lids. The suction varied though the sucker kept in place covering the head as the rest of the tentacle stroked up and down my slickened shaft.

I gasped as the smaller tentacles in my ass pounded my prostate harder, moaning as the larger tentacle gripped and slid up and down my shaft as the sucker worked over the head, drawing and releasing. I felt my orgasm building in the base of my spine, zipping like electricity through my paralyzed body. When I came it hit me hard, my balls contracting almost painfully. My body shivered, unable to do anything else, even as the smaller tentacles swarmed the water in front of my spurting cock, collecting what semen wasn’t lost as little soft white clouds in the water.

When my heart stopped trying to beat out of my chest and my breathing finally slowed, the world seemed to come back to me. I’d just been penetrated and jerked off by a tentacle monster. It would just be me and Japanese school girls at the self-help group I was going to need after this.

My eyes opened and rolled to the side to see Takashi pounding on the glass and shouting angrily, Riley standing beside him with a hand over his mouth.

And they had seen. They’d seen everything. Fuck. I wanted to curl up and disappear.

Of course I couldn’t even curl up, let alone disappear. At least Swartbek was happy. He was happy as an over-tentacled clam, still flying high on the buzz my pain had given him. He also had enjoyed playing with me. Long dark tentacles petted me soothingly even as I caught the horrifying thought from Swartbek that he thought he really ought to keep me. My gaze sought Takashi’s, trying to beg with my eyes to get me the hell out of this frigging fish tank.

I don’t know if it was the eye contact or my post-orgasmic endorphins settling down, but suddenly I could sense Takashi very clearly. His mind was cool and calming, even as anger and concern raged through him while he pounded on the glass. He was equal parts worried about me and enraged at the Pyn Moordenaar. Yet, still, his thoughts were smooth, almost fluid. I had to jerk myself out of his head before I let myself become happily lost in his rolling thoughts. It was more peaceful than nearly any aspect of my real life, especially right then.

My eyes found Riley’s. The green of his irises seemed to glow. Worry for me radiated off him like heat from a fire. It almost seemed to make the air shimmer around him, but that might still have been my contact high from the Pyn Moordenaar. Riley’s mind was still in pretty good shape since I’d unraveled him. The threads of his thoughts were easier to follow than they should have been, though. He only had a few minor tangles caused mostly by my disappearance and then bloodied reappearance. At this distance I shouldn’t have been able to read him so easily, I thought I could even untangle him if I wanted to.

I broke eye contact with Riley and tried to pull back. The Pyn Moordenaar began to dominate my thoughts and feelings. I tried to push it out, to quiet my head. I felt Swartbek’s mind as he happily petted me, Riley and Takashi in the room past the glass, but then I felt more. Beyond the door someone or something was passing by, hurrying down a hall, worried about if he’d made a fool of himself in front of the half-pixie he had a crush on. Doubt and embarrassment swirled around him like dark ribbons, he walked further down the hall and it was gone. Luckily, there either weren’t rooms next to the one I was in, or there was no one in them. I was overwhelmed with the three minds in the room I was in. It was wrong. I normally couldn’t sense people so well unless I was touching them. Even then, I couldn’t wade through their thoughts and feelings easily. It was so simple now, I could hardly stop myself. Riley and the Pyn Moordenaar were especially transparent. I could peel their minds open and find their every secret if I wanted to. Takashi’s thoughts were more slippery. I could still wander in his mind more than I ought to, but the things I saw and felt slid past me like shining fish in a river. I caught a glimpse and they were gone.

Takashi was banging harder on the glass, the noise reverberating in the water like a muffled gong. Fat tentacles wrapped around me until I couldn’t see anything but swirling black and gray gesturing emphatically to my angry dark-haired friend. I heard an ungodly screech, like nails dragging across a chalkboard. The tentacles surrounding me loosened enough I could see the room. A huge black cat I recognized as Takashi had his front paws pressed against the glass. Four long gouges trailed along the glass from the sharp black claws unsheathed from black furry toes.

My muddled mind fixated on the fact that the pads of Takashi’s paws were all pink, not black like I’d expected. I wanted to play with his paws, push under his toe-tips to make his claws come out and then retract. It made me think of how his paws must have been absolutely adorable as a baby… er, kitten. Pink toe-pads like little beans. Toes like beans! I giggled.

Fuck I was still high.

Swartbek decided he wanted to keep all his tentacles more than he wanted to keep me. Two big black arms slapped the glass. The space between them flexed and shimmered. I didn’t see Takashi change back, but it was his two strong arms that thrust through the magicked glass demandingly. Swartbek held me tighter for a moment, tentacles curling around me, before thrusting me forward into Takashi’s arms.

Then I was out of the water, though a few tentacles followed me. The one over my mouth detached and I sucked in eager breaths of unsweetened air. A final black and gray arm stroked my thigh affectionately before Riley surprised me by slapping it away. The Pyn Moordenaar’s arm pulled back behind the glass. He hovered there in the water for a few moments before retreating to the dark hole in the wall behind him. I blinked blearily as Swartbek disappeared from my sight. After a few moments more, I couldn’t sense him in my head either.

Stranger than that though, was how the things I’d felt from Swartbek faded almost as quickly. That was fucking new. I’d felt a lot from the Pyn Moordenaar. There’d been curiosity, amusement, annoyance, fear, irritation, and regret. Normally, that much contact with so much emotion would involve a serious shower and some quality time with my shiny little blade. Now, though, it faded after the source of the emotions was far enough away. Even the euphoric buzz that had been bouncing in my brain faded, leaving me way more sober than I wanted to be.

I was wet and cold in Takashi’s bare arms. I shivered, still unable to move more than that. I loved the feel of Takashi’s warm skin and warmer thoughts. His care and concern flowed over me, warming me more than his skin against mine. He was naked, clothes shredded and discarded when he’d shifted into a big-ass kitty. I admit, I enjoyed all that bare skin. It was like cream tinted with coffee. His skin was fair, but without the red tones so common in pale people. Like me, I was sort of fair-skinned. I didn’t tan well, I burned well. Although, I didn’t know if that had just been my glamour. Takashi was fair without that ruddiness. It made me want to lick his skin and see if he was sweet like cream.

Then he was turning and I was distracted from all that yummy bare flesh. The little yellow-haired man was back, and he look concerned. I felt his worry, bitter in the air. He was tugging at his beard and frowning.

“Your rooms aren’t far,” Uruisg told Takashi. “Do you want to go there directly, or would you like me to find you both some clothes first?”

There was no judgment in his tone, as though he’d be perfectly happy with either choice. Takashi surprised me when he simply hugged me close to his damp chest and nodded for Uruisg to lead on. I thought he’d at least grab us a sheet or something. I supposed he wasn’t shy. Honestly, I was too shell-shocked by that point to care if someone caught a peek of my ass anyway. Riley followed behind us quietly, also looking nonjudgmental. It made me wonder if the fae commonly wandered around the halls starkies.

Before I could put much more thought into it, we’d made it to our rooms. When Uruisg asked, Takashi and Riley both said they didn’t want separate rooms, they wanted to stay with me. Uruisg just nodded like that was expected.

“I think you’ll find everything you might be needing,” the little man told us with a smile. “Let me know if that turns out not to be true.”

Takashi and Riley both gave Uruisg a deep nod of their heads. It looked like a mini bow. I felt I should thank him for leading us around and helping, but I was too distracted. I was bad enough before we made the short trip to our rooms; semi-paralyzed, wet, shivering, and vaguely traumatized. It had made it hard to focus.

Then in the halls I realized I could feel every mind within about ten feet of me, and if I wanted I could snoop through those minds like a peeping Tom. It was easy as fucking pie, easier than lifting a finger. Not that I was able to lift any of my fingers.

We had walked through the halls, and it wasn’t the architecture or strangeness of the rooms that caught my attention this time, it was the minds of the people we passed. Some were behind walls, in other rooms. It didn’t seem to matter if they were hidden behind stone or wood walls, if they were in my little sensory circle I could see into their heads.

There seemed to be quite a few different kinds of… species there. Calling them creatures or beings seemed weird. Each had a different kind of flavor or feeling. I knew when I felt another fae like Riley, like a sunny blip in my radar. Then we walked further and he was gone. It felt like if I tried I could have reached out further for that mind again, but I was tired and didn’t really feel the need to go poking around in some stranger’s head.

The other thing that hit me was that the residuals of the things I sensed seemed to slide off me not long after the person was out of range. It was terrifyingly amazing and completely unprecedented. I knew it had to be temporary, probably some odd side-effect of the healing. It couldn’t last. Nothing so perfectly wonderful could be something I’d get to keep.

Takashi’s thoughts were quiet and undemanding. If I tried I could feel his determination and worry, along with the gears in his head grinding, thinking, planning.

After Uruisg left us, Takashi turned to Riley.

“Did you learn in the Court of Light how to keep out prying eyes and ears?”

Riley looked a little offended. “Of course.”

The flame-haired fae walked the perimeter of the room as Takashi gently set me down on a bed at least twice the size of a king. I couldn’t speak yet, but I gave him permission to look me over by blinking twice. It was awkwardly clinical, but it was nice to have someone confirm I was healed.

“There are still some scars, though,” he said touching my chest. “I don’t know why your burns scarred but the other places didn’t.”

Well, that was good to know. I was glad to be healed, not as excited about the scars. Maybe I could make it funny or ironic even if I couldn’t get rid of the scars. Like, get a tattoo around it of a name sticker so it said, ‘Hello, my name is WHORE.’

Hilarious.

Riley toed off his shoes and slid into the bed next to me.

“Find anything?” Takashi asked.

Riley nodded and dropped what looked like a few odd seeds and a braid of small grass into the shifter’s open palm. Takashi stepped away from the bed a few feet before his hand was engulfed in a sickly green flame.

“Holy shit,” I croaked.

Hey, I could talk again! Yay!

The flame extinguished and Takashi blew the ashes from his palm.

“You know all kinds of useful little things,” Riley smirked playfully as he tucked a soft blanket over me.

“Tch,” Takashi rolled his eyes. “Calling the flames is sometimes useful, but not very difficult. Bakeneko learn to control it not much after they learn to walk.”

“I’m inviting you to my next barbeque,” I rasped. “When it’s windy it’s a complete bitch keeping the charcoal lit.”

Takashi didn’t smile, but he looked like he wanted to. Instead he sat next to me on the bed and looked at Riley.

“He seems healed except for some scarring.” Eyes like honey went from the small fae to me. “How are you feeling?”

I thought for a moment, taking stock of my body. “Surprisingly good, all things considered. Not being able to move is a bit less than fun, but nothing hurts.”

I tried to move, starting with my fingers and toes.

“Oh!” Riley exclaimed. “You just wiggled your finger!”

I smiled and was surprised to find I could shake my head at his cute excitement.

“You just shook your head,” the petite fae continued. “Doesn’t that make you happy?”

I couldn’t help but snort. “Are you quoting ‘The Princess Bride’ at me?”

“It seemed appropriate.” Riley looked sheepish. “You’ve been mostly dead all day.” His warmth was welcome as he snuggled close. “I like this much better, even if you can’t dance a jig yet. I think you’ll get there.”

“I don’t think I knew how to dance a jig before,” I muttered.

“Jig dancing is underrated.” Riley told me with a smile before laying a soft kiss on my cheek and looking suddenly serious. “You scared us, Mick. It seems like your glamour didn’t just break, it exploded.” He tugged a lock of my now-silver hair. “I do like this, though.”

“What does that mean?” I asked. “That it exploded?”

“Someone can’t just magically put your old glamour back together on you, like stitching a ripped seam,” Riley said. “Someone, probably you, will have to remake your glamour.” He blew out a breath. “Your old glamour was complicated and hard as steel. You should be able to learn to put on a simple glamour to look the way you did, but there might’ve been other things worked into your old glamour that you won’t be able to get back.”

“Like what?” I wondered as I worked on wiggling more fingers back to life.

“I have no idea.” Riley shrugged. “If you really were a changeling, then there might have been regulators put on your abilities.” When I just looked confused he continued. “I’ve never heard of a Sift being given up as a changeling, but there are some fire fae that do it. I think they are just snooty and don’t want to deal with small children, but whatever. They make their baby’s glamour not just so the little one looks like the human baby, but also incorporate regulators so that when he gets older he doesn’t accidentally burn the house down. Changelings are usually recovered just before puberty. They’re reintegrated into their family and the glamour with its regulators are removed.” Riley cocked his head slightly and looked at me. I could feel his mind ticking as well, trying to put things together. “If you were left as a changeling with a regulated glamour, you’ve been suppressed for… How old are you again?”

“Thirty… I was found when I was about three though, not a baby.”

Riley waved his hand like it didn’t matter. “So, about twice as long as that kind of glamour should have been kept.” He sighed softly and brushed my hair away from my face. “I just want you to be prepared if you feel different or if odd things start happening with your empathy. Also, you can learn to weave your own glamour. If we can get something worked out with the king, you can go home again.”

I didn’t tell them that my empathy was already different, that I could feel more than Riley’s sincerity. I could see his personal experiences with other changelings, like videos on fast-forward. I could feel his distaste for those that used the practice, but the bitter-tasting emotion didn’t stick to me. It passed when Riley’s thoughts moved on.

It was too new and I didn’t trust it was going to stay. Almost like talking about it would shatter some spell and things would go back to the way they were. If this was permanent, the implications were life-changing for me.

I tried to imagine a life without hurting myself, drinking, or drugs to help control the side-effects of my ‘gift’. It was hard to imagine, not even having to do all the little rituals worked into my daily life to keep me sane. The money I’d save in hand-sanitizer alone…

“Do you know where you are?” Takashi asked, interrupting my thoughts.

“The Unseelie Court?” I was pretty sure, but I’d been kind of out of it.

Takashi nodded. “We couldn’t just take you to a hospital in Iowa City, you don’t look human.” His long ebony hair pooled next to me as he reclined by my side. “But you were too hurt to just patch you up and let you get better on your own. The only places we would be able to find a healer on short notice would be the Unseelie court or the Seelie Court, where there is a bounty on the head of any of your kind.”

“Makes sense.” I nodded, happy I was able to do so.

“We spoke to the king’s representative, and he to the king.” Takashi explained. “He allowed us safety and protection in his court, healing for you, and a boon to Riley for finding the last known Sift.” Riley looked decidedly uncomfortable as Takashi continued. “But there will be a price.”

“What price?” I asked while experimentally wiggling my feet and toes.

“We don’t exactly know yet.” Riley said haltingly. “We put some limitations on it, but we were pretty desperate. It might be bad… hopefully not too bad.”

Riley looked so upset I kind of just let myself slump over a little to kiss him. I was going for his cheek but missed and had to settle for his neck and chin.

“Hey, you did the best you could in a shitty situation,” I murmured. “And I appreciate it, thank you.”

Takashi stiffened a bit. “That’s another thing. You don’t know enough about the fae right now. Now that you’re healed we can only stall so long before you meet the king. We need to teach you enough to keep you out of trouble.” Takashi stroked my arm to soften his words. “Like just then, you should never openly thank a fae. It’s an old thing among them. To humans it’s just an expression of appreciation, to the fae it means you recognize that you owe them something for what they’ve done. Many would hold it against you.”

“I wouldn’t.” Riley cuddled me soothingly. “Don’t worry.”

It made me think of every movie I’d ever seen where the lowly peasant had to be taught to pass for royalty. Only for this, if I flubbed I could be totally fucked, not just tossed out of the party.

I must have looked worried as hell, because both men embraced me.

“It’ll be alright.” Riley spoke softly. “Takashi spent decades in this court, and a lot of what I know from the Light Court will aid us, too.”

Takashi raised a hand and gestured. The lights from no source I could see dimmed. I was comfortable and warm between the two men as they wrestled the covers over the three of us.

“Rest.” Takashi whispered. “Planning and preparing can wait until morning. I even had Uruisg make sure a message got to Guy letting him know you’re healed. There’s nothing to be done for now but rest.”

I shouldn’t have been able to sleep. My mind should have been whirling in a thousand directions, worrying about what would happen. I was exhausted, though, and I was out even before I’d gotten all of my body to be able to move.

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