Camp Lore - 40. Chapter 40

After I dropped Andy off near the HQ, I expected to slip into my dark bunk but instead found it all lit up. The guys were loose and laughing, and they’d had help getting there. The six of them were sitting around the table in their half of the cabin, cards out before them, but less playing than celebrating.

“There’s beer,” Jim said, and Greg pointed to the table, where several wet cans sat.

I opened one, took a gulp, then asked, “What’s up?”

Since it was the last week of camp, and everyone was partying, I didn’t expect much. But I was wrong.

“We’ve got the funniest story,” Dan began.

I sat on the edge of Steve’s bed, taking off my shoes.

“And this is new,” Paul added.

“In fact, it’s still happening.”

“We’re not even sure how it’ll turn out.”

“But it’s gonna be great.”

“And funny.”

“And legend.”

Even Greg agreed.

I took another drink. I knew if I waited, the guys would tell me.

“To begin with, Brian slammed in here, roaring drunk, right after we got back from the Canteen.”

“When was this?” I asked.

No one seemed to know.

“Maybe an hour ago.”

“Longer than that.”

“Was it really?”

I’d noticed Brian wasn’t there, but figured he sleeping or swimming – though it was pretty late for that. There was the even the chance he was out with Laura. In any case, I needed to return his keys.

“We were just sitting down to play,” Steve said.

“That’s right – you’d dealt,” Jim confirmed.

“And we were opening the beer one of the counselors had brought us.”

“End of camp present.”

“Thanks for the good service.”

“Only tips we’re allowed to take.”

“Then Brian slopped in here raving.”

“You could tell he was drunk.”

“He could barely stand up.”

“It’s amazing he got back to camp.”

“Where was he?” I asked.

“Guilford.”

“The bar outside Guilford.”

“Guilford Center.”

“He somehow staggered the mile and a half and then in from the front gate.”

“Good thing he didn’t drive.”

“He’ll have to get his car tomorrow.”

“Later – it’s already tomorrow.”

And they laughed. Evidently, they’d forgotten I had Brian’s car.

“Anyway, he was ranting about what a louse he was.”

“And how Julie didn’t deserve him.”

“And Laura didn’t deserve him.”

“And how he ought to be punished.”

“He was kinda crude about that – about how he should be treated.”

“A lot more permanent than a Scarlet A.”

“What’s that?” Paul asked Nate.

“You didn’t read it in like seventh grade?”

“No.”

“Then look it up.” He turned to Greg. “I can’t believe it wasn’t assigned.”

“Public schools.”

“Anyway, after he ranted a while, he passed out.”

“Brian?” I had to ask.

“Who else?”

“He smelled like booze.”

“Not beer – booze.”

“It was all over his shirt.”

“Like he’d spilled it.”

“Or thrown up.”

“He said he’d been kicked out of the bar.”

“After they quit serving him.”

“Said he tried to thumb a ride.”

“But no one’d pick him up.”

“And they couldn’t even smell him.”

“But anyone could see he could barely stand.”

“At first, we were laughing at his rants.”

“Then they got boring.”

“So we went back to playing cards.”

“And he flopped down on my bed,” Dan said.

“Not even flopped – fell.”

“Tripped.”

“And passed out.”

“And we were fine with that.”

“At least, it was quiet.”

“‘Cept for our noise.”

“And we’re not exactly monks.”

“But no one can hear us out here.”

“Except the drama counselors.”

“And who cares about them?”

“Then Dan realized we were missing something.”

“Thanks for giving me credit.”

“I mean, Brian was just lying there.”

“Sleeping.”

“Helpless.”

“He wouldn’t even know what we were doing.”

“What anyone was doing.”

“But that created a problem.”

“A big one.”

“‘Cause we had the perfect target.”

“But didn’t know what to do with it.”

“To it.”

“So we ran through all the camp stories.”

“As many as we could remember.”

“We thought about shaving his head.”

“That’s about all the hair he has.”

“We thought about shaving the rest.”

“But no one wanted to go near that.”

“We thought about shaving his eyebrows.”

“But that’s just mean.”

“We thought about stripping him and tying him to the basketball pole.”

“But no one would see him.”

“Or not enough people.”

“We thought about tying him to the flagpole in front of the HQ.”

“But there were still too many counselors around.”

“Bunk patrol.”

“And we’d get in trouble.”

“Then we remembered about a guy who’d been stripped...”

“And tied in a rowboat...”

“And pushed into the lake...”

“Drifting.”

“But that seemed too dangerous.”

“I mean, guys die that way.”

“Then we thought about the island.”

“The island?” I had to ask.

“You know – the one just across from the waterfront.”

“The one they warn the kids about.”

“The scary island.”

“With the ghosts.”

“That eat campers.”

“That’ll get them if they even come close.”

“I think that’s Linden’s doing.

“His idea of water safety.”

“Skull Island.”

“No one’s ever called it that.”

“But we figured we’d take Brian there.”

“And strip him.”

“And handcuff him to a tree.”

“I knew my handcuffs would come in handy,” Dan gloated.

“And let him wake up.”

“And wonder where the heck he was.”

“And how he got there.”

“And how he’d get back.”

“And if someone would see him in the morning.”

“And tell Linden.”

“Who’d fire him.”

“Well, we couldn’t let that happen.”

“‘Cause we’d all get fired, too.”

“They’d trace it back to us.”

“I mean, who else would do that to him?”

“Except his friends.”

“So we thought we’d let him stay there for a while.”

“Then one of us would go back and get him.”

“‘Cause it’ll be too late for more than one.”

“The camp’s already quiet.”

“Even one guy’ll have to sneak around.”

“But that’s okay.”

“‘Cause it’s gonna take him a while to sleep that off.”

“And his head’s gonna hurt.”

“So that’s what we’re doing.”

“Playing cards.”

“And waiting.”

“And drinking.”

“And drinking.”

And they all laughed.

Like they’d pulled off the best prank ever.

And maybe they had.