Never say love - 2. Chapter 2

"Sandy, are you alright???" his tone sounded so concerned. He was then holding my face with his both hands to take a look at my forehead once again. He might have thought that I lost my mind due to the accident. His amazing dark eyes were looking at my face so closely; I found it hard to breathe.

"Sandy, are you there???" he asked me again.

i regained my composure and replied "yeah, I am fine". I saw a sigh of relief from Varun. He was smiling now...

"Thank god, i thought you have lost it" he said with a grin, it was so boyish.

Yep, i completely lost it, I was standing there like a stupid moron looking at him. He was looking like a Adonis.

"Dude, are you here to buy something?" Varun asked me. I looked at him for the hundredth time trying to collect words to say. He looked at me with raised eyebrows and shown me at the direction of Popcorn stand and said "popcorn?". I nodded my head like a 3 year old baby. How stupid was that???

He slowly put his right arm over my shoulder. I felt like an electric shock passing through body, he dragged me towards the popcorn stand. He had that mind blowing aroma like a sweet lime and chocolate around, i wonder what deodorant he was using.

"So what do you like caramel chocolate or salt pepper?" Varun asked me, his thick eyebrows were raised.

I couldn't get words out of mouth. All the things I dreamt were finally coming true ..but….

"Are you there?" Varun asked me again.

"Yeah, Chocolate" I said.

He ordered two chocolate popcorns, paid for it and gave me one. Like a good 3 year old child I took the popcorn, shook my head and went back inside. Before Varun left he gave me this funny look as if I was a weird looking puppy and left.

To say it in short I was in a complete dizzy. I behaved like a stupid 13 year old virgin girl. And I was damn sure that he would never talk to me or look at me once again. Who would talk to a clumsy little kid behaving like a mentally disordered? My first real moment with my long time secret crush was a complete disaster and I felt like I would never look at him again.

I stood there (for God knows how long) watching him leave gracefully and then I returned to my seat. Rishi was complaining

"Dude, where is my coke? And why do we have only one popcorn" he asked

"Stop bitching, I forgot" I tried to shut him up.

He looked at me for few seconds and then said "I don’t know dude, but lately you are like a weird looking alien abandoned by a spaceship, I don’t know why" Rishi said. 'Exactly the point' I thought to myself.

'So let me get this straight, not really, little bit curvy, i mean my secret crush story, its neeeeveeer going to happen, a guy who look like a Dolce & Gabbana calendar model, like a walking sex dream is ever going to like me? ‘Forget that for a second he is damn fucking straight, but who cares’? I am a hormonal rushing teenager; I can dream all I can, right?' I thought to myself once again.

After few more minutes not-so-handsome Harry Potter finally killed the monster, the film ended. God, the film was so horrible. And why on earth Daniel Radcliffe had to wear a full size black gown in the entire movie when he could happily pose nude with a placid cock along with a male horse in London theatres. Somebody should put some sense into the filmmakers here...Any which ways we finally returned home and guess what Rishi decided to stay over at my place for the night.

I have been friends with Rishi ever since my Fourth standard. Before my mom and I moved into this house Rishi was kind of my neighbor. We have clicked from the very first moment we met. Rishi grew up to become a relaxed cool dude. He got this don’t-care attitude and we have been through our best and worst times. When my dad departed from Earth 6 years before, Rishi was like my rock, he stayed with me for weeks. He has been my best buddy. But unfortunately I have not gathered enough courage to tell him that I am gay. There had been few times I secretly had 'hots' for him at the time of puberty. Even though, lately he grew up to become a good looking guy now with his awesome hairstyle, tall toned framework and seductive lips, I am over that. My feelings towards him kind of drifted apart over the years. And now, my entire world revolves around Varun.

"So dude tell me, what’s happening in your college" Rishi asked me lying in my bed stretched his arms above his head. I could see his smooth well toned chest shirtless but jeans on. Little bit of hair down below the navel.

'On any other day in the past if Varun minus in my mind I could totally dig that' I thought.

‘Nothing really exciting, How about yours?’ I asked. Rishi was studying in a popular Arts college. Unlike me, he knew exactly what he wanted.

I removed my shirt and jeans and wore my favorite shorts. Rishi was kind of staring at my body for 2 seconds and then said "Dude, I think you put on some muscles there, are you working out or something without my knowledge?"

"Nah, i am just doing regular pushups".

Well, I was never into sports but little bit conscious of my physic like any other gay man. Rishi like any other straight guy was into sports. He plays basketball for his college now.

"Is there any hot girls in your class you like? Man, it’s so boring in my boys only college" Rishi said.

Moments like these I so wanted to tell him that i am only attracted to boys, but I couldn’t. I was afraid that I could lose my friend over that. I was not even sure how he would react. And then I said