i've read it. read it before Guarded actually. i liked it then, i'll like a second time around.

I’ve read it and it’s a beautiful story. I look forward to reading it a second time around when you publish it on here.

He was recently diagnosed with HIV, and he was wrecked.  I'll never forget the last two lines he ever wrote to me - "Who could love me now?  Who could possibly love me now?"

How sad he had to feel this way. I'd liked to have answered him. 

tim is HIV+.  He told me that on our first date. As a police officer it was something I dealt with per our procedures. As a boyfriend/lover, it's different again. First you have to learn about this disease and understand what you can do to protect yourself. 

And then the hard work starts. You have see him first and not the disease. 

And love is so very possible... I wish he'd have written you again, Wayne. 

1 hour ago, MichaelS36 said:

He was recently diagnosed with HIV, and he was wrecked.  I'll never forget the last two lines he ever wrote to me - "Who could love me now?  Who could possibly love me now?"

How sad he had to feel this way. I'd liked to have answered him. 

tim is HIV+.  He told me that on our first date. As a police officer it was something I dealt with per our procedures. As a boyfriend/lover, it's different again. First you have to learn about this disease and understand what you can do to protect yourself. 

And then the hard work starts. You have see him first and not the disease. 

And love is so very possible... I wish he'd have written you again, Wayne. 

I know.  I still hope that he read my work, that he internalized it, and more - that he explored the options for counseling and treatment I researched for him and sent along.  Rural Louisiana is a pretty awful place to find yourself in his situation, but even there I dug up options for him to explore.  I just hope he did.

I work in healthcare, and we have a great program for PrEP and HIV prevention.  We also have a wonderful treatment program for those who are already positive.  I see patients reclaim their lives from the disease.  These are people, not a condition.  Though, it takes work for many of these folks to see themselves that way - for them to move past that.

You're right - love is possible and probable.  It requires education and work.  But, man, what a payoff.

He was the push I needed to write Camp Refuge.  Though he never wrote again, many others did.  I take solace in that, and in the hope that he found a way to see himself as a person deserving of love.

Thanks for the comments, Mike.

Edit: By the way... I think it would have been so powerful for him to have heard from you, Mike.  This young man wrote to me almost two years back, but there will be others.  I may call upon you for help in the future if that's all right.  I can only speak to the clinical side of things, but you have lived experience.  That's powerful in a way I can't match.

Of course, if I can help...I will.

1 hour ago, MichaelS36 said:

Of course, if I can help...I will.

Thanks, Mike.  I appreciate it.

1 hour ago, Thorn Wilde said:

Well, when you do decide you want to go back and rewrite and edit, I'll be here. I've been meaning to read it for a while, but if you're planning on doing that I'll definitely wait.  

Thanks, Thorn.  It may end up my next project after I finish the two I'm on now.  It'll take a lot of work, but it'd be worth the effort.