Full sails and long winded, forward straight ahead steady!

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My so called "boredom" slowly seeped away as Memorial day faded, the week continued without falter. I started some classes I am getting out of the way when I return for school and an influx of people returned from school. I could descend from my earthen tower upon the town below and enjoy.

And I did enjoy.

Road trips were planned and some crazy trip to Rome might happen, so that is exciting news. However as Thursday rolled around my own "fake" Friday since I don't have class on Friday, party invites were sent out for some birthday party. Birthdays were big here at least in the summer. No prior obligations, parents usually escaped to their mountain retreats or some country far across the sea. My parents recently left for a week and a half to New York. I'm kind of irritated they did not offer for me to go, but I did not complain. I had the place alone to do whatever. Which could amount to a myriad of things, use your imagination.

Summer tends to bring people together again, which is all well and dandy but it does lead to awkward situations. Friends seem to fade away, they found better ones at college or ex-lovers return to tell stories of their new affectionate conquests. None of the above applied to me, in a sense. A lover did return as he always does, we went through high school together and nearly could be called best friends but never really made it official. It was secretive and behind the scenes.

I felt it through the ground, rising and swelling, some sick storm I knew I'd have to combat. It was inevitable, we moved in the same circle and usually ended up finishing nights off together. I figured it was necessity and nothing more. The substance lacked and the tangible, metallic taste of 'love' was never there.

We were both masters of our craft; simple charm. We both spoke soft, delicate words that wrapped about your brain and tickled your emotions. We both had an exalted form of thinking, we were thoughtful and righteous and equally as zealous on various opinions. Dirty reflections of the other. For some background, this came to light (this being whatever we are) after my first ever so called "boyfriend" moved away. I jumped around between then with various girls and boys during college but this thing, us, he and I right after Christmas and slowly dripped into summer until most of us departed for college.

I had gotten text messages of his arrival, only a handful of my close friends knew of our relations with each other. His relations with men seemed to be far more quiet on his side than mine. I did not mind and people knew but rarely spoke about it. I did not receive any more, or less attention for it either way. I could see why he was hesitant to pursue anything considering his family was a hardcore Catholic. Hardcore.

Hardcore.

During the process of our "figuring out" stage - before now at least, right now I mean - I felt it was some sort of game. Conquer the Catholic. Beat the whole "ew kissing boys" thing some of them seem to exude. I don't mind religion, it isn't a big deal to me. I don't even really care but it was one of those things on my to-do list. I completed it naturally.

The event first occurred after leaving a party incredibly wasted. We had gotten to talking and knew of each other through school. We shared a similar love for music and text and prattled on about that as we walked up the Hill (where we live, it was easier to walk while drunk than risk even driving) - I offered to walk him up since we were in the same vicinity. It ended with him making out with me. I enjoyed it and informed him in my drunken stupor we should continue another time. And we did. Eventually later on I lost my man virginity with him (I keep relations with males and females completely separate) and it was great. The best clandestine affair yet and his affection was frothing. I'm a cold lover, if anything and he made up for it but at the same time he took the cake for taking up a wilder stance on life.

College happened and we parted. We spoke over Facebook randomly and it faded to that. Occasionally texting on a major holiday. I remember him calling me on New Years, drunk. I forgot what I said to him, I was probably drunk too.

Now summer has come and he is back and really now that I think about it, its not THAT big of a deal. I make him seem like a celebrity but really he isn't. I had already intricately planned on getting with him if I had not gotten any throughout the summer. I figured he wouldn't mind and it was a mutual thing, providing we were still on speaking terms.

Anyways, so Thursday night somebody held some get together. Small, there was booze and T.V stuffs. It was a decent beginning to a weekend. He, the boy who I will call Maryland since he goes to school there - and I am tired of typing "he" , was there. I was accompanied by a few girls of mine and we inserted ourselves flawlessly. There were a lot more people than I had imagined, but I rolled with the punches. I got a drink. The drink didn't do much so by my fifth shot I was enjoying myself. Maryland made way towards me and throughout the night I had been thinking on what I would say.

And frankly we can all just cut the shit and admit that we've been interested in a certain person for however long and you're always plotting and brooding on how you'll deal with them once you meet again. We small talked and exchanged college stories which became a eloquently worded pissing match on who drank more. I at some point asked him, "Do you still kiss boys?" and Maryland looked at me and nodded lightly to himself. I figured it was college, everybody kisses everybody in college. Feeling remotely annoyed I was about to get more to drink when he offered, "I'm seeing somebody, actually