BeaStKid Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 Second Chances is a beautiful story about two boys who have both lost someone close to them. It is a story that tells of their ordeals, their lives and the challenges they face and at the same time learning to live with their mistakes and loses. It is a beautiful story. One that I'd recommend. Good going, tiger!! BeaStKid Link to comment
FrenchCanadian Posted January 6, 2008 Share Posted January 6, 2008 I can't agree more, the only one big complain that I can make is that : you coulda spend more time developing the prologue. other that that, the story is just interesting! great going! Link to comment
Site Moderator TalonRider Posted January 7, 2008 Site Moderator Share Posted January 7, 2008 It is a good and interesting story if I do say so myself. I'm saying this as a reader and not because I edited it. Link to comment
CarlHoliday Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 I certainly have to agree, this is an interesting story. The two boys have at least one thing in common and quite possibly might have more. The only thing I have trouble with is the drugs, but I'm an old fogey who can't remember my own dalliances into the world of chemical stimulation. Considering one of the boys is supposedly dealing with addiction, I was hoping for a little more strength on his part, but I'm not the author, so I'll have to wait an see how it all turns out. I hope for the best, though. I like the characterizations, too. Lexis is especially interesting and should be fun in future chapters. This is a great story, read it! Link to comment
Tiger Posted January 7, 2008 Share Posted January 7, 2008 I certainly have to agree, this is an interesting story. The two boys have at least one thing in common and quite possibly might have more. The only thing I have trouble with is the drugs, but I'm an old fogey who can't remember my own dalliances into the world of chemical stimulation. Considering one of the boys is supposedly dealing with addiction, I was hoping for a little more strength on his part, but I'm not the author, so I'll have to wait an see how it all turns out. I hope for the best, though. I like the characterizations, too. Lexis is especially interesting and should be fun in future chapters. This is a great story, read it! They are teenagers. The chemical stimilation is a reflection of my experimentation when I was younger. I do NOT advocate drug use at all. Do not forget that one of the characters died of an overdose. FYI, his death is based upon my personal experiences. One of my underclassmen died when I was a junior in high school. Lexis is a spoiled rich girl. She almost always gets what she wants. I look forward to writing more about her. I would like to thank you all for the feedback. Link to comment
Site Moderator TalonRider Posted January 7, 2008 Site Moderator Share Posted January 7, 2008 Considering one of the boys is supposedly dealing with addiction, I was hoping for a little more strength on his part, but I'm not the author, so I'll have to wait an see how it all turns out. I hope for the best, though. Even if he hadn't smoked with the rest of the group, it wouldn't have helped him when the special Brownies were brought out. He had no idea that Lexis was known for doing that. Jan Link to comment
Tiger Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 Even if he hadn't smoked with the rest of the group, it wouldn't have helped him when the special Brownies were brought out. He had no idea that Lexis was known for doing that. Jan Lexis can be quite devious. The special brownies had a sticky substance in them. I'm surprised more of the teens did not puke after having brownies and booze. Link to comment
C James Posted January 12, 2008 Share Posted January 12, 2008 You're off to a good start! One criticism I'll make is that the chapters stop at #2. A higher number would be much better. Seriously, you're off to a good start here. Lexis is very interesting, and I like characters who are a little unusual. I also like her reasons regarding the swim team. Oh, and the ending of Ch 2? Definitely a Cliffhanger. Link to comment
Tiger Posted January 12, 2008 Share Posted January 12, 2008 You're off to a good start! One criticism I'll make is that the chapters stop at #2. A higher number would be much better. Seriously, you're off to a good start here. Lexis is very interesting, and I like characters who are a little unusual. I also like her reasons regarding the swim team. Oh, and the ending of Ch 2? Definitely a Cliffhanger. Coming from the Queen of Evil Cliffhangers, I do not know whether to take that in offense or if I should consider it a compliment. Yes, Lexis is rather naughty, but she is not the story's heel. She's just a naughty girl in need of learning important life lessons. Link to comment
C James Posted January 20, 2008 Share Posted January 20, 2008 Coming from the Queen of Evil Cliffhangers, I do not know whether to take that in offense or if I should consider it a compliment. Yes, Lexis is rather naughty, but she is not the story's heel. She's just a naughty girl in need of learning important life lessons. Hey now, you know I never use cliffhangers! But, yes, that was a CLIFFHANGER! I like Lexis, she reminds me of someone I knew in college. She caused all kinds of trouble. LoL Link to comment
BeaStKid Posted January 21, 2008 Author Share Posted January 21, 2008 Hey now, you know I never use cliffhangers! Me thinks that is another cliffhanger!!! Link to comment
old bob Posted February 15, 2008 Share Posted February 15, 2008 Second Chances is a beautiful story about two boys who have both lost someone close to them. It is a story that tells of their ordeals, their lives and the challenges they face and at the same time learning to live with their mistakes and loses.It is a beautiful story. One that I'd recommend. Good going, tiger!! BeaStKid I just came randomly to this story. BeaStkid wrote all what I want also say to it. Go on, tiger Link to comment
GaryK Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 Yeah right, CJ. You're not the Queen of the Cliffhangers. Sheesh. Tim, I reviewed both chapters in detail so you can look there for my comments. At least in Chapter 2 you've learned CJ's cliffhanging tricks very well. As for the drugs. Well, I'm speaking from experience as an addict who's been clean since 1979. Let's face it, drugs and especially alcohol are part of the teenage experience. To deny it is to deny reality. Including them in your story, Tim, is part of what helps make it seem realistic. There are also varying degrees of staying clean and sober. I'm a coke and heroin addict. Not a day goes by that I don't think about both of them even though I haven't used either one in decades. I do smoke pot on occasion, but I rarely touch alcohol. So to me Jesse's use of pot and beer isn't all that atypical. I just hope it doesn't turn out to be a gateway to the worse stuff he used to do and possibly ruin what could be a great relationship with Markus. Second Chances has so much potential. Please don't abandon it. Link to comment
Tiger Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 Yeah right, CJ. You're not the Queen of the Cliffhangers. Sheesh. Second Chances has so much potential. Please don't abandon it. I could never be as good at creating evil cliffhangers as our king. I am not abandoning Second Chances. I am working on Dark Earth: The Prophecy and my anthology for now. Look for new chapters after the first part of the Dark Earth trilogy is finished. Link to comment
Benji Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 (edited) I could never be as good at creating evil cliffhangers as our king. I am not abandoning Second Chances. I am working on Dark Earth: The Prophecy and my anthology for now. Look for new chapters after the first part of the Dark Earth trilogy is finished. ..........So we should see that about the same time you or Frenchy hit that 1,000th post, right? Edited February 20, 2008 by Benji Link to comment
GaryK Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 Yeah, I guess you're right about CJ and cliffhangers, . He and I correspond frequently via PM and I really him and his stories; including the damn cliffhangers, ! I'm not much for sci-fi, but I'm willing to give your story a chance. I look forward to starting to read it later this evening, . Link to comment
Tiger Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 Yeah, I guess you're right about CJ and cliffhangers, . He and I correspond frequently via PM and I really him and his stories; including the damn cliffhangers, ! I was one of the first to defend his usage of evil cliffhangers, but I draw the line at allowing him to get away with deny using them. Link to comment
GaryK Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 but I draw the line at allowing him to get away with deny using them. I'm with you on that, Tim. I love how he tries to play Mr. Innocent when it comes to the cliffhangers. Not that any of us actually believes him, right? And I certainly don't let him get away with it either. I've teased him mercilessly about it! Link to comment
Tiger Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 I'm with you on that, Tim. I love how he tries to play Mr. Innocent when it comes to the cliffhangers. Not that any of us actually believes him, right? And I certainly don't let him get away with it either. I've teased him mercilessly about it! .Why am I not surprised. I tease him about it as well. He still denies it. :wacko: Link to comment
GaryK Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 It'll be kind of difficult for him to deny it now that he's won the 2007 King of the Cliffhangers award, eh? Link to comment
Tiger Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 It'll be kind of difficult for him to deny it now that he's won the 2007 King of the Cliffhangers award, eh? He's still trying to deny it, blaming Steve (Shadowgod) for adding the evil cliffhangers in beta. Link to comment
GaryK Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 I won't divulge confidences, but there's more to that award than meets the eye and it's very funny. Link to comment
Tiger Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 I won't divulge confidences, but there's more to that award than meets the eye and it's very funny. Who would I need to talk to for details? Link to comment
GaryK Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 On the off chance you're serious I would talk to CJ. But you really already knew that didn't you? I'm heading off to CJ's forum to post my take on his latest chapter. It's kind of different than what everyone else is posting and might make some people mad at me. Link to comment
FrenchCanadian Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 Second Chances has so much potential. Please don't abandon it. I am not abandoning Second Chances. I am working on Dark Earth: The Prophecy and my anthology for now. Look for new chapters after the first part of the Dark Earth trilogy is finished. Yeah, his new chapter will be a nic one,, tho with no cliffie in it,, unless Mista hide the end of the chapter to me. ..........So we should see that about the same time you or Frenchy hit that 1,000th post, right? Most likely, LOL, but you shoulda said, "you and frenchy" and please don't call me frenchy... no offense to anyone, but it sounds too much like france,,, and I don't like that Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now