Cool Quotations

[ricky]

 

Bessie Braddock (to Winston Churchill): Winston, you're drunk!

 

Churchill: Bessie, you're ugly! But tomorrow I shall be sober.

 

[ricky]

[Former Member]

I too am an absolute quotaholic, so just some of my favorites

 

 

Giving advice to a stupid man is like giving salt to a squirrel - Kashmiri proverb

 

Use what talent you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except those that sang best. - Anonymous

 

 

When your candle burns low, you've got to believe that the last light shows you something besides the progress of darkness - Tennessee Williams

 

 

Edited January 10, 2010 by Jiv'undus

[Rebelghost85]

First my favorite insult:

 

"May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your crouch"

- Middle Eastern swear

 

Then my favorite from Vonnegut:

"...I now ask you to look precisely at one[star], and then precisely at the other."

...

"Even if you'd taken an hour," he said, "something would have passed between where those two heavenly bodies used to be, at, conservatively speaking, a million times the speed of light." "What was it?" I said.

"Your awareness," he said. "That is a new quality in the Universe, which exists only because there are human beings."

...

"I have thought of a better word than awareness," he said. "Let us call it soul."

-from Timequake

[JamesSavik]

They have us surrounded? Those poor dumb bastards. Now we can attack in all directions.

 

General Chesty Puller, USMC at the Chosin Reservoir in 1951

[myself_i_must_remake]

To pretend, I actually do the thing: I have therefore only pretended to pretend.

-Jacques Derrida

 

Oh Yes,

there are worse things than

being alone

but it often takes decades

to realize this

and most often

when you do

it's too late

and there's nothing worse

than

too late.

-Charles Bukowski

[KJames]

They have us surrounded? Those poor dumb bastards. Now we can attack in all directions.

 

General Chesty Puller, USMC at the Chosin Reservoir in 1951

 

James, that's the first time I've heard someone mention his name since I watched a documentary on him on the History channel about 2 1/2 years ago...he really accomplished quite a few things, didn't he?

[KJames]

"Ya can't teach a Cat to Bark!" ~~Jim Donley's Grandmother

 

But they can learn to chirp like a bird without our help!

 

-----

 

A good leader cares more than others think is wise. - Unknown

Edited January 12, 2010 by kjames

[Fishwings]

"Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend." ~ Unknown [often associated with Albert Camus].

 

 

 

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." ~ Dr. Seuss.

 

 

 

"Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill because they ticked me off."

[Phantom]

Everyone is wise until they speak - Irish Proverb

 

All of us are crazy in one way or another - Yiddish Proverb

 

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. - Albert Einstein

 

Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living - Albert Einstein

 

Do. Or do not. There is no try - Yoda

 

A computer is a lot like an air-conditioner... it works just fine till you open windows - Random IT guy

 

And my current favorite:

A falling object will land where it can do the most damage - Murphy's Law

 

The greater the value of the rug, the greater the probability that the cat will throw up on it.

[JamesSavik]

James, that's the first time I've heard someone mention his name since I watched a documentary on him on the History channel about 2 1/2 years ago...he really accomplished quite a few things, didn't he?

 

Chesty Puller is a legend in the Marine Corp. He started off as an enlisted man at 17 at the very end of WWI and fought all the way to Korea. He made it all the way to General.

 

He was a soldiers soldier. He never ate until his men ate and had the same stuff they did. At forty he could walk or run teenagers into the dirt. He was one tough son of a bitch.

 

At Guadalcanal in 1942 he took a six shell fragments and only went to relieve aid after the battle was over and all of his wounded men had been tended to. One of the shell fragments was too close to his spine to remove anywhere short of a major hospital so he told the surgeons to leave it in.

 

He ended up the most decorated Marine in history.

 

BTW- he fought the legendary Sandino rebels in Nicaragua in the thirties. It turns out that the idealistic revolutionaries were simply horse and chicken thieves and raped any women that they caught alone. Puller ran them out of the country and was considered a hero of the people for decades until Ortega rewrote history.

[JensenC]

First my favorite insult:

 

"May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your crouch"

- Middle Eastern swear

 

 

I love this one, but the whole thing is

 

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your crotch

and may your arms be too short for you to scratch.

 

lol

[JensenC]

Dear Lord,

So far today I've done all right.

I haven't gossiped, cursed, or lost my temper.

I haven't been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish or over indulgent.

I am really glad about these things.

But, in a few minutes Lord,

I am going to get out of bed,

and from then on,

I'm probably going to need a lot more help.

 

 

 

[TetRefine]

Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterward.

-Vernon Law

[JamesSavik]

Experience is a comb that life gives you after you have lost your hair.

 

-unknown

[zland666]

stupid is stupid does.

 

~ Forrest Forrest Gump~

[John Doe]

"You have to realize you are not the only one in this world that is suffering." - I dont remember who...

 

"Yes, by the end of Grease, Sandy had become your basic 1958 model ho: the girl who, after suffering months of rejection for being a party pooper prude who didn't drink or smoke, has finally realized that you do have to pet to be popular, you do have to put out to get the guy, and it's not the blondes who have more fun - it's the sluts"- Bitch- by Elizabeth Wurtzel

 

"All things with a form eventually perishes, but these feelings inside <us> won't." - Can't remember this one either...

[JamesSavik]

"I've been rich and I've been poor; Believe me, honey, rich is better."

 

"From birth to 18 a girl needs good parents. From 18 to 35, she needs good looks. From 35 to 55, good personality. From 55 on, she needs good cash. I'm saving my money."

 

"Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere."

 

"Four things a woman should know: How to look like a girl, How to act like a lady, How to think like a man, And how to work like a dog"

 

-Sophie Tucker

[rknapp]

My favorite is the very same that you see in my signature. At the moment:

 

"Scientists discover the world as it is; Engineers create the world that never has been." - Von Karmen

[Red_A]

My favorite is the very same that you see in my signature. At the moment:

 

"Scientists discover the world as it is; Engineers create the world that never has been." - Von Karmen

 

Well I am an engineer too.

 

And this quote was used to explane why an extremely complicated electronic field theory had to be broken down into very simple explanations, that contradicted each other. However I believe it applies to everything!

 

To Simplify is to Ly

To Understand requires Simplification

Explanations are Lies

G.N.Patchett 1968

Edited January 18, 2010 by Red_A

[JamieD]

"Remember, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Except for herpes. That shit'll come back with you."

Jeffrey Tambor in "The Hangover"

I'm sorry I just find it really funny

[TetRefine]

"The more you sweat in practice, the less you bleed in battle" -Unknown

[Phantom]

"The more you sweat in practice, the less you bleed in battle" -Unknown

 

The marines have a similar saying:

 

"Pain is only weakness leaving the body."

[KJames]

Sir Winston Churchill, former PM of Great Britain (RIP), was addressed by a rather plain, well-to-do wife at one of his social functions thusly: You, sir, are drunk!

 

To which he replied without breaking stride: And you, madam, are ugly. But I shall be sober in the morning.

 

Bear in mind, there's a saying, "Kids and drunks tell the truth."

Edited January 23, 2010 by kjames

[lav20]

my favorite quote is from Strangers With Candy.

 

Jerri Blank: "Orlando, you can't be a pilgrim. The pilgrims had snowy white skin to match their pure Christian souls. They didn't sacrifice coconuts to their monkey gods."