Yuki Winchestor Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 (edited) hey guys. The question is: can a person have a phase of intense attraction towards the same sex and be straight now? Edited March 23, 2011 by Yuki Winchestor 1
Yuki Winchestor Posted March 22, 2011 Author Posted March 22, 2011 (edited) yahoo! I finally edited the question. I want to apolologise about the confusion. I am still learning how the site works. So thanks to the other respondants for being so patient Edited March 23, 2011 by Yuki Winchestor
Bumblebee Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 the question says it all. Lets not mix dis up wid bi dunno... I've never been attracted to guys, I could understand on some level what my friends were going on about how hot guys are, but I'm attracted to women, and only women
Tenebrae Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 I'm not really sure exactly what you're asking. The "dis", "dat", and "wid" stuff aren't words I recognize, so I'm withholding my answer until I know what the question is. 2
Michael9344 Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 There was this girl I had a mild attraction for. Nothing sexual just.., well, attraction. I compare it to van der waal's attraction. But I intensely attracted to a guy at the same time. This one I compare to electrovalent force. It was much more intense.
Yuki Winchestor Posted March 22, 2011 Author Posted March 22, 2011 to Tenebrae, the question was, whether a person could have a phase of intense attraction towards the same sex at a point of time and be straight at present? I am sorry for the confusion. I am still getting used to this forum and am not very phone internet savvy yet 1
JamesSavik Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 LOL- that sounds like some of my redneck friends that say I'm not really queer except at deer camp. All they are doing is rationalizing away the social baggage that comes with the labels of gay or bi. Sexuality is a continium. It's not really black and white. It's best illustrated by the chart created by the sex researcher Kinsey: People that are completely homo or hetero sexual are rare. Most people seem to fit somewhere in between. Here's a few links that discuss it in more detail: http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b54/jamessavik/kinsey_scale2_001.jpg[/img]"]Kinsey Institute Kinsey Scale at Wikipedia Hope this helps and totally understand how hard it is to use smartphones and type. Especially with auto-incorrect. 2
Site Administrator Cia Posted March 22, 2011 Site Administrator Posted March 22, 2011 I have to agree with James. It's hard to find someone who, if they are truly honest, can say they don't have any attraction for the same sex, ever. I fall about a 2 on the Kinsey scale, not so much by preference but by habit. I like looking at men and women equally in terms of what attacts me to do that, but I'm married to a man and have been for a long time so I find myself gravitating more to men.
TrevorTime Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 There are some women that I find attractive, but the attraction isn't so strong that I would want to have a "relationship" with them. And I've never really had a close female friend; I've always hung out with "the guys". So there is no question in my mind that I am gay.
TetRefine Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 (edited) When I first starting getting sexual feelings, it was very much directed at girls. Guys were something nice to look at and to be curious of, but I was definitely more interested in girls. Then as middle school went on, I became more and more attracted to guys, but girls were still #1 in my book. Then high school hit, and I quickly (for reasons unknown) started to lose interest in women and grow more strongly sexually attracted to guys. To this day I am still baffled at how I went from being Bi, Strongly Leaning Female, to Bi, Strongly Leaning Male. I've been trying to figure it out for years, but I've given up and just accepted the fact that it happened and this is what I became. Do I still find some women attractive? Oh yeah, but I don't have a strong urge to get into bed with them like I do men. Edited March 22, 2011 by TetRefine
Nephylim Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 i don't suppose I can answer as I am not straight and never have been, although I have heard it said that just about everyone has some attraction to a member of the same sex at some point. I don't know
Leah Ray Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 hi yuki, it was a bit difficult to get the question initially. Anyway, i hope that this helps. I dont believe in stereotypes. People are unpredictable and are driven by multiple reasons to do what they do. I had a phase of attraction too but now i dont. Someday i might again. But i am not really sure about whether i am attracted only to one sex. Attraction is relative and shouldnt be confused with real love
Tipdin Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 Many people see sexual orientation as a "this-or-that" issue. In reality it's not so simplistic. Sexual orientation is on a sliding scale and can often change to some to degree. It follows then that many people will have attractions one way or the other and back again in varying degrees of intensity. There don't seem to be too many people like me, that have NEVER for a split second wondered about their sexuality and NEVER had any change at all in where they are on that sliding scale. (That would be slammed up against the peg and wrapped around it at the gay end...)
Tenebrae Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 Ok, now that the question has been refined, I am a category 3 on James' sliding scale thingy. I am attracted to both my own gender and the opposite one equally. There is no "wanting" one more than the other with me. Beauty can be found in all things, and I am lucky enough to be able to find it in both boys and girls without leaning to either side of the fence. It's not just outwardly appearances that attract me either. I can see beauty inside as well as outside. I have always been that way and, God willing, I will always be that way. 1
Tipdin Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 Ok, now that the question has been refined, I am a category 3 on James' sliding scale thingy. I am attracted to both my own gender and the opposite one equally. There is no "wanting" one more than the other with me. Beauty can be found in all things, and I am lucky enough to be able to find it in both boys and girls without leaning to either side of the fence. It's not just outwardly appearances that attract me either. I can see beauty inside as well as outside. I have always been that way and, God willing, I will always be that way. I have always thought that being bisexual was the most advantageous way to go about it. It's just that very, VERY few people are willing or able to explore "the other" side of their sexuality. I think that there are lots and lots of people that are actually more bisexual than what they will admit. I used to manage a heath club and a big part of what I had to do was break up the sexual situations in the men's locker rooms. Then I would see those same men leave the club with their wives and kids...
Tenebrae Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 I have always thought that being bisexual was the most advantageous way to go about it. It's just that very, VERY few people are willing or able to explore "the other" side of their sexuality. I think that there are lots and lots of people that are actually more bisexual than what they will admit. I used to manage a heath club and a big part of what I had to do was break up the sexual situations in the men's locker rooms. Then I would see those same men leave the club with their wives and kids... I know there are more that aren't willing to admit it. My best friend is one of those. I try not to goad him when I catch him looking at a dude's arse, but sometimes he's so blatant about it --- I can't help myself. I'm hoping as he gets older he will grow more comfortable with his own sexuality and be able to let that side of him bloom. There's nothing worse than being split into two people --- the one the world sees and expects, and the one inside that you want the world to see and expect.
Tipdin Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 I know there are more that aren't willing to admit it. My best friend is one of those. I try not to goad him when I catch him looking at a dude's arse, but sometimes he's so blatant about it --- I can't help myself. I'm hoping as he gets older he will grow more comfortable with his own sexuality and be able to let that side of him bloom. There's nothing worse than being split into two people --- the one the world sees and expects, and the one inside that you want the world to see and expect. I assume it's difficult for them to be so conflicted. Although, it's nice that coming out is far easier today than it used to be.
Eros Posted March 29, 2011 Posted March 29, 2011 Hmmm... you know, I really can't say... I would usually probably say just straight up "no", but I guess that would be totally ignorant. I guess anything is possible, and human sexuality is whack anyway, and hella complicated... To me, I consider a "straight" person as someone who hasn't, nor never will, find a member of the same-sex attractive. Well, sexually attractive. Just because a guy compliments another dude on his rad, cool-looking eyes, or awesome hair doesn't make him gay, but you know what I mean. But, like I said, anything is possible.
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