Depression

[joann414]

I am with Mark. It seems lately that everyone is meshing, reaching out talking to each other, and learning to communicate, voice their feelings and opinion,in a helpful or respectful way. The more we communicate, be willing to be there for each other, the easier it will be for someone to come here for the first time, and post their feelings if they need, and ask for a little boost. That is the first impression I got of this little group. You can come here, voice your doubts, your feelings of inadequacies, or fears that you would not share anywhere else, and feel comfortable in doing so. This is one of the posts here on the site that I think is really helpful to many, and hope everyone will stay supportive of it.

 

Hope all are starting out a great week. Hugs to all.

 

Also, I am a person who loves to correspond through the mail, if you are comfortable. I love to send cards, small gifts, and definitely a holiday buff. If you feel comfortable, I would love for you to pm me your address, and i will be glad to reciprocate.!

[Bumblebee]

Joann, I actually hate writing my feelings up on here, but I think that for anyone who cares to read what I ever have to say, will somehow start to slightly get why I might say things that seem strange. This is going to sound insensitive but I don't really care about what's going on in other people's lives.. That's just how I am and it's not something I can change. It probably wouldn't worry me all that much if I never spoke to any of you again. As much as I despise it, I'm smart enough to realise that sometimes when I feel suicidal or just having a bad day, that when I get what I'm feeling off my chest and share some bits, that the problem doesn't seem so bad.

 

This is worse then pulling my own teeth out but I have to agree with what you've said Joann (and believe it or not, I do mean that in a nice way)

[harcallard]

I have been absent for sometime now.. The reason for this is because I have been spending some much needed time with Kalen, working, and trying to figure out some things in my life......I have missed you all and hope things are going the way you want them to be.. I am not sure when I will be on again, but I will never be far away if anyone needs to talk....

 

Keep a smile on your face and love in your heart.

[joann414]

Hang in there Har. You sound ten times better than you did when I first came here. Whatever you are doing is agreeing with you. Keep it up, and visit when you can. Hugs, Jo Ann

[Mark92]

Hey all

 

Yeah Tim, we can all see the differnce, you are so much better. Keep it up. We are all here if you need us.

 

 

Hugs all round

[Mark92]

Hey folks

 

Well it's term time again for Stuby, and I have to find something to focus on. So to that end, and still on the track to better myself, hold on wait for it.

 

I've signed up to the Open University to do full time study.

The three courses combine to give me a BA (honours) degree in 3-4 years time. I'm doing Art and Humanities, which has a creative writing path. Because it's the Open University I get to study at home, and have online tutoring, I can even take the exams that way, because of my circumstances.

So a new life change to focus my thoughts on. Onwards and upwards!

Hope everyone else is doing okay??

 

Hugs all round

[Breeze]

As I just stated in your status' lol that is so wonderful Mark! Congratulations!

 

I'm doing ok I guess. I put myself back in counselling again. Not weekly like it was, but once a month, so that s good. I've been stuck , so this helps me moving forward again.

 

Hope everyone is doing good. And Happy Canadian Thanksgiving! I am so thankful for the people in my life and especially the people here on GA.

 

Hugs all

Shelly

[Mark92]

Thank you Shelly

 

May I ask what you do day to day? Just curious

 

My first psychologist was a first class prick (excuse language) My second was just recently, he couldn't have made it easier for me. He made an out of hours visit with my doctor. And didn't sit asking me questions. It was more observation. I baked most of the day after showing them around the farm. I made tea and cakes and cooked them a dinner. It was relaxing and friendly with no pressure to speak about me at all. It was also on a Sunday, so they both gave their time up for me. I'm looking forward to next visit.

 

Hope you feel better soon Shelly, and if you need an ear please email me.

 

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving too

Edited October 7, 2012 by Mark92

[joann414]

Breeze, hope you are doing better, and hope that you are happy.

 

Mark, I am so glad for you being able to go to school at home. You are so knowledgeable anyway. It blows me away. I wondered when Stu would return to school. Will be thinking of you both. You see so happy when you talk of him. I am here if you need an ear, a shoulder, and just want to smack someone around.

 

 

To everyone else, have a good week. Hugs to all, Jo Ann

[comicfan]

Breeze- wishing you the best and Happy Belated Thanksgiving

 

Mark- I couldn't be any prouder of you! Hope everything continues to go your way.

[Conner]

That's just the greatest news, Marky! Good on ya!

 

Hi to everyone!

[Mark92]

Hey All

 

Thanks to all, I'm doing some of the free courses they offer, to get me into the mood. It's interesting and absorbing. I lose track of time.

 

Thanks Conner Good to see you here

[Xtro]

From my time studying with the OU back in the early 1990s (no on-line stuff, though you could word process your assignments, provided the ribbon in your dot matrix printer was still good for ink) you should have a pretty good time of it. Not sure if they still do Summer School as a requirement, but if so then you might also find it useful to go for a week - though the Student's Union used to jack their bar prices up something terrible when the OU were on campus (Uni of East Anglia in Norwich - the land of the six fingers and web toes!)

[Mark92]

LOL They still have summer school, though it isn't a part of the course I've chosen. I've always loved art, writing and poetry. I am already so into the free courses.

Because of my circumstances they can allow for me to do my assignments online and have a home visit for the examinations. Progress eh?

The OU is very good academically as its next after Reading and that is very good. It's also where Stuby is at

 

Good to see you here Xtro and everyone gets a hug

 

Hugs all round

[comicfan]

Well if nothing else you are getting your education, Mark. As a former teacher you know what an education means to me so I am as happy as can be to see you go for it.

[harcallard]

I haven't been on for awhile..actually it feels like forever... I have been working through some personal things which needed to be dealt with. I don't even know what is going on with everyone. It makes me feel lost. I have been working a lot lately and not much time off...I hope everyone is doing well....

 

Hugs and love

 

Harc.

[Mark92]

Hi Tim, Did the personal stuff go well? I still visit everyday, just dont post everyday. I hope your doing better?

 

I think everyone just has very busy lives and catch up when they can.

I'm doing okay, the studying is taking my mind off other things. I got told off last night by Stuby's mum for having no heating. Because I am so remote it would cost a fortune, and I dont think my turbine is up to creating enough, so going the electric route means a huge cost too for a bigger turbine.

Am I staying here after I get through the gate? I dont know. So I'm still weighing things up.

 

Hope all are well

 

Oh, and Tim I've told you before mail me and i'll answer

Edited October 15, 2012 by Mark92

[comicfan]

Mark

 

What do you mean you still don't have heat? Doesn't that also mean you have nothing to cook on?

[Mark92]

I bought an electric cooker Unc, don't worry. I've just ordered a halogen heater for in my room until I know what I'm doing.

[Xtro]

Hey, my mother came from Norton-le-Clay by the moors. She was born in 1920, so we have a pretty good idea as to what it can be like, even in the 1970s.

 

Don't get cold - and don't go to sleep cold either. Sometimes the nights up your way can get cold enough to freeze the nipple rings off a teen queen - and I, for one, don't want to read about you from a clipping of a local newspaper.

 

Maybe, instead of electrical, look at LPG - for one, it's designed to be contained outside - most gas appliances need little (or no) modification, and you can (with respect and a little know-how) treat it like plumbing when it comes to extending the feeds (though remember to use regulators and flow-cutoffs for the safety they provide.)

 

Just don't get cold, okay?

 

Love & Hugz!

[comicfan]

Mark always going to worry but wanted to make sure you were ok.

[Mark92]

Hey all

 

Okay, will you lot quit worrying, I'm fine.

When the wind turbine was finally up and running 8 years ago now, there was central heating put into every room but this one, I almost live in and the kitchen. Because this room and the kitchen had heating from the Aga.

Now my Aga has broken, I have a brand new shiny electric cooker.

Gas is out completely, the nearest road is 3 miles away, and I would have to pay for the piping to bring it here. You can have a guess at what that could be. I can afford it, but I don't know if it's worth it, or even if I'm staying here.

So, I have ordered an ocillating hologen heater, my wind turbine can't take on much more. So I dont want to stress it. And I still need to sell some to the grid if I can. The reason it's extra cold here is I'm in a horse-shoe of hills so a sun trap in warm weather but howling winds and drifting snows in winter. Unc you'll remember I was snowed in for 9 days one winter. Not funny.

So I'm fine, and if I do get cold I can knit myself another blanket or jumper Thanks all

 

Hugs all round

 

Norton-Le-Clay is very pretty Xtro, this house is victorian so would have been here then

[joann414]

Mark, glad you have some form of heat. I wish I was as self sufficient as you are. If hubby had to go somewhere for a long period of time during the winter, and I lost power, I would probably burn the house down trying to start a fire. I can get a fire started in the fire pit though, so I guess I could stand outside all day by the fire. Seriously, and I can't knit , or sew. That's pretty pathetic huh? My siblings say that it is because I was so spoiled growing up, and all of them did everything for me. The hubby sews on buttons because the one time I did it, it fell off when he went to button his shirt. So, I guess I will stick to cooking and cleaning.

 

Stay warm. I am still fighting this cold or sore throat or whatever the hell it is. I threatened to just sit down in a chair and sip boubon until I either knocked it out or killed me. Just leave a note behind explaining that the empty bottles were not the result of me being an alcoholic, but I just had a cold.

 

Hope everyone is doing well and outruns the flu and cold this winter. Hugs, Jo Ann

[Mark92]

Sorry Jo but I laughed my head of at that.

You are never to old to learn, everything I do I learned out of necessity. I learned to crochet and knit to make blankets when I was younger. I learned to cook to feed us. That sort of thing, so you can learn. These days there are step by step lessons on the internet for everything. I do what I do because as yet I have no choice and never have. I enjoy my work outdoors though so thats a good thing. And now I have Stuby, GA and my studies I'm good indoors too.

 

Hugs all

[Xtro]

The first sewing machine I learned on was my mother's - three-quarter horsepower electric motor, around 2,000 stitches a minute - it was an industrial thug, but she was a seamstress. Hence learning to knit, crochet, hand sew, etc. Used to make tidy money in the RN when it came to repairing dress uniforms and the like. It's second nature to me, like sorting out general household stuff, DIY, etc. Like you say, you do what you have to when you're out in the wilds - and at 7 years old the family moved into the wilds of Suffolk for over 40 years...